How To Deal With Silent Treatment From Gf

exhausted

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Why are you arguing with a woman? No, why are you arguing with anyone...?

You can stand up for yourself and respect your own point of view without resorting to arguments. She's going to have her little tizzy fit one way or another anyway, so why get yourself riled about it?

Regards the silent treatment, they'll usually get over it if you leave them alone. If they don't, well, like has been said, they've got deeper issues going on that you don't wanna get yourself involved with.

When people get p!ssy with me, I treat them like a toddler having a tantrum; ignore them until they calm down and back down.
My ex used to stay about 3 nights a week. She would get mad or start a fight over nothing or something little (BIPOLAR) and her natural tendency would be to go silent like this, the first year i would try to resolve it and talk as i didnt like being ignored in my home as she stomped around then i just lst her be as she would usually go to bed early so i would plays ps4 or play pool or something downstairs. It got to the point sometimes i would tell her to leave she can go pout and stomp around at home. At a lot of times if she was not here and started arguments i would just go ghost for a few hours as feeding into a bipolar rage is literally pouring gas on the fire. Id say going to lift or hit my bags or something. She would be upset either way but it kept me from being a punching bag in an unwinnable fight.
Its not like she thought i was out with other girls but i kept my frame that i wasnt going to argue over petty things or be brought into those unstable outbursts.

When she calmed down and became logical i would return to converse and communicate.

She would say i was pouting or punishing her i would say NO i am not getting attscked for nothing iam protecting myself. U want to talk dont be disrespectful
 

exhausted

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Its incredible to me how the more she needs you, the worse she acts. She(and many other women) grossly misinterpret when it is "ok" for them to start mistreating a man. I would take it as a total lack of respect, she truly believes(falsely) that she "has" you and can do what she wants. If i moved to be with someone, I would be walking on eggshells kissing their A$$ bc if I didn't I'd be homeless.
Lack of respect but moreso a lack of control as she is emotionally unstable.

My ex wanted us to get land and build a house as it was both our dream. I ssid im not leaving my house to move in one with u to have u leave or kick me out half the time. I wont be homeless.
Get along here and now and if u grow and we have the right security then that is the path.

She NEVER straightened up and i refused to make the move. She always bitched about it but never focused on being better.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Lack of respect but moreso a lack of control as she is emotionally unstable.

My ex wanted us to get land and build a house as it was both our dream. I ssid im not leaving my house to move in one with u to have u leave or kick me out half the time. I wont be homeless.
Get along here and now and if u grow and we have the right security then that is the path.

She NEVER straightened up and i refused to make the move. She always bitched about it but never focused on being better.
She probably didn't hear you... You where speaking to her narcissistic shell. They don't hear anything they don't want to.
 

dude99

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Is there any point in reading her text messages? Or just delete and try to move on.
Just delete. Again anything positive ever come from dealing with this woman? Delete move on. Reading the texts will only benifit her agenda.

March to the beat of your drum. Not hers.
 

dude99

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Lack of respect but moreso a lack of control as she is emotionally unstable.

My ex wanted us to get land and build a house as it was both our dream. I ssid im not leaving my house to move in one with u to have u leave or kick me out half the time. I wont be homeless.
Get along here and now and if u grow and we have the right security then that is the path.

She NEVER straightened up and i refused to make the move. She always bitched about it but never focused on being better.
She probably had a plan to have you build her dream home on your dime then kick you to the curb when her name was on title. We all know how the laws favour women. She didn't focus on getting any better because you were probably her short term plan. The house was her long term plan.
 

exhausted

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She probably had a plan to have you build her dream home on your dime then kick you to the curb when her name was on title. We all know how the laws favour women. She didn't focus on getting any better because you were probably her short term plan. The house was her long term plan.
I understand ur point but what she had in mind would take both our incomes, we do pretty decent. She genuinely wanted me forever just doesnt have the emotional ability to get along
 

dude99

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I understand ur point but what she had in mind would take both our incomes, we do pretty decent. She genuinely wanted me forever just doesnt have the emotional ability to get along
Ah ok. Still amazes me the gall of todays woman though she wanted you to comply with her " i wants" but refused to look at her own behaviour
 

exhausted

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Ah ok. Still amazes me the gall of todays woman though she wanted you to comply with her " i wants" but refused to look at her own behaviour
Yep.
She would break things off all the time over nothing and try to get back tog immediately.
I told her thats no way to live. Wont do it.
No man can marry a woman down the road with that instability
 

dude99

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Yep.
She would break things off all the time over nothing and try to get back tog immediately.
I told her thats no way to live. Wont do it.
No man can marry a woman down the road with that instability
Agreed. Had a few girls try that power play in the past with the " if you won't give me my way then we are through. "

It's incredible how they squirm and panic when you say " ok goobye. " then when they blow up your phone, and you remind them you have a 1 chance per lifetime rule. They realize they made the biggest mistake of their lives
 

soulforge

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Lack of respect but moreso a lack of control as she is emotionally unstable.

My ex wanted us to get land and build a house as it was both our dream. I ssid im not leaving my house to move in one with u to have u leave or kick me out half the time. I wont be homeless.
Get along here and now and if u grow and we have the right security then that is the path.

She NEVER straightened up and i refused to make the move. She always bitched about it but never focused on being better.
This is very similar to my situation, one of the reasons she gave me of not being happy is because, she misses her home town, friends etc.. she at one point suggested i leave everything here, quit my job and move into her house, in her town.

But I straight refused.. she could kick me out of her house at any moment.. the relationship was already somewhat unstable, so dropping everything to go to her was a HUGE risk..

But she was unhappy here, so for me it's no win situation.. i couldn't carry on seeing her, long distance once a week, as we already have done that for over a year
 

exhausted

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This is very similar to my situation, one of the reasons she gave me of not being happy is because, she misses her home town, friends etc.. she at one point suggested i leave everything here, quit my job and move into her house, in her town.

But I straight refused.. she could kick me out of her house at any moment.. the relationship was already somewhat unstable, so dropping everything to go to her was a HUGE risk..

But she was unhappy here, so for me it's no win situation.. i couldn't carry on seeing her, long distance once a week, as we already have done that for over a year
Yes very similar.
How far away are u two from eachother?
How old is she?

Im 38. I love my friends but at this age dont revolve around living near them.
 
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soulforge

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Yes very similar.
How far away are u two from eachother?
How old is she?

Im 38. I love my friends but at this age dont revolve around living near them.
Her house is around 55mins drive from mine.. we both work full time, so seeing each other from that distance is not always easy, especially with us both working different shifts.. this is why we thought it was best for her to move in with me...

She is 48 and i am 41... in reasonable traffic she could quite easily go see her family or friends maybe once a week, if she wanted.. so this idea that she is missing her friends and family sounds like garbage to me
 

dude99

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This is very similar to my situation, one of the reasons she gave me of not being happy is because, she misses her home town, friends etc.. she at one point suggested i leave everything here, quit my job and move into her house, in her town.

But I straight refused.. she could kick me out of her house at any moment.. the relationship was already somewhat unstable, so dropping everything to go to her was a HUGE risk..

But she was unhappy here, so for me it's no win situation.. i couldn't carry on seeing her, long distance once a week, as we already have done that for over a year
She definately wanted to have all the power if she expected you to quit your job leave your house and move in with her.

Then in a few weeks she would be bitching that you werent working and she would kick you out, then where would you be
 

exhausted

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She definately wanted to have all the power if she expected you to quit your job leave your house and move in with her.

Then in a few weeks she would be bitching that you werent working and she would kick you out, then where would you be
I agree u only ask that of your spouse or if u are engaged.
A year together and asking u to drop ur entire life including your means for survival is a bit selfish and flawed.
 

exhausted

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Her house is around 55mins drive from mine.. we both work full time, so seeing each other from that distance is not always easy, especially with us both working different shifts.. this is why we thought it was best for her to move in with me...

She is 48 and i am 41... in reasonable traffic she could quite easily go see her family or friends maybe once a week, if she wanted.. so this idea that she is missing her friends and family sounds like garbage to me
Ya that is rough. We were 35 mins and was a huge issue. I would have lived w her of she was stable. Did 3- 4 days a week for like 8 months as it saved her 35 min drive to work as her job was literally one mile from my house. She sounds like ur gf where she csnt get along and being ignored in ur own home is bs. That is what i told mine. I wont be ignored for hours in my home while u are stomping around or in bed at 730. Im not quieting my son or dog because u are pouting. Hey im all for the occassional argument and not talking i have tons to do ay my house but that **** is all the time that is no life.
If anything do what i did say move in here and if things progress the right way buying a house tog in the future is the goal. But dont give up ur home to be homeless
I refused.
 

l_e_g_e_n_d

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Exhausted, I notice you've been in this story now with your ex for a few months. Time to move on and meet the thousands of women who are better-looking, grounded, and more compatible.

Not sure if you are a masochist, but this exercise of revisiting your ex, especially over a few months, is self-deprecating.
 

soulforge

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I agree u only ask that of your spouse or if u are engaged.
A year together and asking u to drop ur entire life including your means for survival is a bit selfish and flawed.

This is exactly what she originally was asking of me.. In order for me to move to her city, i would have to quit my job, quit my apartment, probably depend on her financially till i found a new job.. then probably get booted out if things went wrong..


As for her moving to my house.. her job is transferable, so she can take her job back to her home town, also she owns her own house, and her daughters live in it, and pay her rent.. so if things went wrong with me and her, she always has a house to go back to, and keeps her job.

This is why she moved to mine, and not me to hers..
 

exhausted

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This is exactly what she originally was asking of me.. In order for me to move to her city, i would have to quit my job, quit my apartment, probably depend on her financially till i found a new job.. then probably get booted out if things went wrong..


As for her moving to my house.. her job is transferable, so she can take her job back to her home town, also she owns her own house, and her daughters live in it, and pay her rent.. so if things went wrong with me and her, she always has a house to go back to, and keeps her job.

This is why she moved to mine, and not me to hers..
That is preposterous

Women are terrible at being people.
 

daddymonsterpoodle

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Just no. On so many levels this relationship is broken. Instead of worrying about her disrespecting you how about you learning to respect yourself.

This is toxic. Move on.
 

exhausted

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This is exactly what she originally was asking of me.. In order for me to move to her city, i would have to quit my job, quit my apartment, probably depend on her financially till i found a new job.. then probably get booted out if things went wrong..


As for her moving to my house.. her job is transferable, so she can take her job back to her home town, also she owns her own house, and her daughters live in it, and pay her rent.. so if things went wrong with me and her, she always has a house to go back to, and keeps her job.

This is why she moved to mine, and not me to hers..
Another thing this is controlling.
I bet u already know she is controlling.

My ex played that a bit last year now that i remember she wanted me to sell my house and get one w her i said no move in here and 1 make sure we can live tog and 2 pay off ur debts as u dont have money for a home and she said no she didnt want to live in my house. When i ended things she complained i wouldnt let her move in. Wtf.
 
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