What exactly is an ex?

[sazc]

That's what I assumed as well. They were friends before the husband came into the picture. Women act on how they feel at that particular moment in time. That's when all logic goes out the fvcking window. She didn't give a damn that she was ruining two marriages and a lengthy friendship.

My current GF doesn't hang out with her friends when their significant other is in tow. They go out and do girly things together, and I actually prefer it that way.

Unhappy women get into this weird state of thinking that someone new is going to solve their issues. For whatever weird reason, they think that this other dude is a magical solution that would 'never' be like their current dude (boyfriend or husband). (please note that I am in no way assigning blame for the females state of unhappiness on the male)

One would think in this day and age, with the amount of information available at our fingertips, the majority of females would know that insta-replacement dude aint going to fix what was broken and, in the case of disrupting other relationships, it's such unsavory and trashy behavior to be 'that female'

 

[l_e_g_e_n_d]

Women act on how they feel at that particular moment in time. That's when all logic goes out the fvcking window.

Quoted for truth.

Gentlemen, herein is why high IL alone does not guarantee loyalty. Women DO act on how they feel at the moment. And a scorned or angry woman may act in spite. Hence, why you don't give exclusivity to women with male friends, as these "friends" are waiting to capitalize on her vulnerable moment (assuming she is hot, which she better be if you are on this site), and when she does act in spite, a higher quality girl will not slvt herself to a random dude but will fvck her friend, as "he has always been there for her."

 

[SkrooU]

Quoted for truth.

Gentlemen, herein is why high IL alone does not guarantee loyalty. Women DO act on how they feel at the moment. And a scorned or angry woman may act in spite. Hence, why you don't give exclusivity to women with male friends, as these "friends" are waiting to capitalize on her vulnerable moment (assuming she is hot, which she better be if you are on this site), and when she does act in spite, a higher quality girl will not slvt herself to a random dude but will fvck her friend, as "he has always been there for her."

Exactly why I won't commit to the plate I was talking about. One of her "friends" kisses her on the mouth when he meets her, buys her gifts, etc. She admits to me that he's suggested a relationship with her in the past. Has she fvcked him? Hell if I know. He's either one patient dude or completely pathetic. All I've ever done for her is buy a glass of wine on our initial hook up and let her pick out some movies from Redbox.

I've played the game before with women. If I want exclusivity, I just start throwing female friends in her face. Then suddenly they start finding reasons to eliminate their "friends". I believe there are some women who just want you to prove you're valuable enough for them to dismiss their backup men. They are simply using people as bargaining chips. If you don't have chips, you get no respect. Yet I don't feel these women are worth it anymore. You win the game and just end up with someone who will default to using people as bargaining chips. Relationship not going well lately...suddenly a new friend appears, and you have to play the game again. But it doesn't mean you can't have some great sex with them.

 

[SkrooU]

Do they know about each other?

In my distant past, no. I've grown as a person since then. Yet without that experience, I'd be naïve today. I've been on all sides of infidelity: the cheater, the guy who's banging the girl who's cheating, the "friend" who has lured a woman into cheating, the guy who's been cheated on. It's why I have my boundaires today. I'm good at sniffing out the garbage I once participated in.

 

[DamnSon]

I committed to a chick who had male friends, one in particular "best" friend from highschool. Was a cool dude, super looked up to me and loved me... but she was clingy with him, always hugging and taking pictures with him. I didn't say anything because I didn't want to look bothered or insecure, I figured who am I to walk up in someones life and tell them who they can and can't have in it? If i'm choosing to trust the girl then whatever, if she ****ed him it was before me. In the past I imposed such rules, I would dump girls if they went to the bar with her girlfriends even. Lol

I assume that maybe when there isn't a main guy in her life they might **** around. Who knows. One time she dropped a comment "Yeah, that's your competition" then cracked up. I almost blew up

 

[Juanto]

Exactly why I won't commit to the plate I was talking about. One of her "friends" kisses her on the mouth when he meets her, buys her gifts, etc. She admits to me that he's suggested a relationship with her in the past. Has she fvcked him? Hell if I know. He's either one patient dude or completely pathetic. All I've ever done for her is buy a glass of wine on our initial hook up and let her pick out some movies from Redbox.

I've played the game before with women. If I want exclusivity, I just start throwing female friends in her face. Then suddenly they start finding reasons to eliminate their "friends". I believe there are some women who just want you to prove you're valuable enough for them to dismiss their backup men. They are simply using people as bargaining chips. If you don't have chips, you get no respect. Yet I don't feel these women are worth it anymore. You win the game and just end up with someone who will default to using people as bargaining chips. Relationship not going well lately...suddenly a new friend appears, and you have to play the game again. But it doesn't mean you can't have some great sex with them.

Does she frequently tell you about this guy, when she meets him, what they talk about, etc?

 

[SkrooU]

She mentions him when she tells me about her plans that include him, or if something that we're talking about is relevant to him or something that happened when she was hanging out with him. He doesn't surface in our conversations much. Why? Think you might be him? lol
I don't know what they talk about or what they do. I don't care enough to ask. Maybe they fvck or just talk about the weather. Hell if I know. I think she just likes the dude as a friend but knows he likes her more so she does just enough to keep him around with false hope. I'm betting she hasn't mentioned me to him because I haven't brought up exclusivity with her. The last time I saw her, she told me to let her know when I fall in love with her.

 

[Once Bitten]

I had a GF in '90 who introduced me as her "friend" whenever I met her friends/family/aquaintences. I was naive. I could never figure out why she did this, but I knew better than to ask. This chick played head games like the best of them.
If this were to happen now, I'd make some sarcastic remark using the nickname later and flip her friends with it. Maybe ask how her friend's "friend" is doing this evening (picking a close friend of hers, of course).

 

[Desdinova]

All attractive women have orbiters.

All attractive women over age 23 have orbiters. After they've been alpha-widowed, they're destined to have multiple orbiters to try and fill that empty void. It's orbiters or cats; they'll both give her unconditional love and attention.

 

[l_e_g_e_n_d]

Good discussion, but it's important to make the distinction between "orbiters" and "male friends." Although male friends can be considered orbiters, or contrariwise, the terms are disparate.

 

[Desdinova]

The hot women I know 18-22 also have many orbiters ime, in fact more of them

I'm not saying that women in that age bracket don't have them. From what I've seen, women over that age are more likely to have them. I don't think I've dated a woman older than age 23 who didn't have orbiters, but I've dated women under age 23 who had no male acquaintances to be found.

 

[Dingo]

Great Thread...

 

[Once Bitten]

To answer the question, what exactly is an ex?

The old saying rings true here, about "sharing my old toys with the less fortunate".
After all, this is often what we get when we land someone's ex.