**** it, lets get married

[Bokanovsky]

A new age marriage would be more of a partnership with both parties working paying bills(whoever makes the most pays the most), doing even amounts of house work and sex without having to work for it..

Why can't you do all of those things without getting married? To use your won expression "lol it's 2016". It is no longer illegal to "live in sin".

 

[Juanto]

Again, blame the guy. If he tries to setup a good mood for sex, he is an a$$hole. If he doesnt, that means he is fooling around with others. No mention to the fact that husband was there way before any kid came along....

 

[Yewki]

I feel like if you tell her in the beginning that if she starts withholding sex you will divorce her and have her sign a prenup, you might be ok.

If a girl leaves you because you won't sign a piece of paper, she's replaceable

 

[cola]

Why can't you do all of those things without getting married? To use your won expression "lol it's 2016". It is no longer illegal to "live in sin".

Because a lot of times if you meet a good woman who is easy going, even if everything is great, the relationship will come to the point where she starts pushing for a ring..

So once you get to this point several times and let a couple decent ones go because ypu wont marry them at what point are you like
"**** it lets get married?'" with someone?
Just figured at some point you'd get tired of starting again

 

[cola]

If a girl leaves you because you won't sign a piece of paper, she's replaceable

I guess.. but dont you get tired of replacing? I mean i get a new phone every year but last year I was like **** it, im used to this phone ill keep it.. figured at some point you would feel that way about a woman

 

[marmel75]

Here's a good link about what happens in a marriage when a woman doesn't want sechs....read the comments section bout how its the man's fault......
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/samantha-rodman-phd/i-save-childrens-lives-yet-my-wife-wont-have-frequent-varied-sex-with-me_b_11644430.html

And it's his fault for allowing it to go on this long. All he simply needs to do is grab his balls if he has any left and get dressed up nice, put on his best cologne and let her know he is going out for the night.

She will get the hint REAL quick.

 

[Trump]

What would it take for you to say these words to a woman?

I mean how many chicks can you really lay? And it may sound soft but after a hard day in the world sometimes its nice to have someone to come home to.
I feel like if you tell her in the beginning that if she starts withholding sex you will divorce her and have her sign a prenup, you might be ok.

Bro you want to legally commit yourself emotionally, financially, spiritually and sexually to one woman because you like someone to talk to after work? Thats a bad trade off.

Getting married is not about not being able to 'lay chicks.' You are entering into a legal contract with the girl, where she has you committed in every portion of your life. If she decides to change her mind about this commitment based on market forces, you will have to pay for her changing her mind. You have to look at marriage as a 'contract', and not look at it as 'love' or 'feelings.' If you want her to sign a prenup, she can sign one. Later she will tell the judge she was confused and under duress and the judge will void it. Notice I am not saying don't get married or marriage is bad.

But don't do anything for 'personal' reasons. Do it because it helps you out in other ways. If you came in here and said 'I am going to get an x million dollar contract from x country, but the condition is I have to be married. Then it's not a bad idea to get married (and protect yourself). But if you do things for 'personal' reasons, people will eventually destroy you since you are working on emotional feelings rather than accomplishments.

 

[CMNILS87]

But in the end, after a certain amount of time....does a woman start pushing for a ring because that's what society tells her will make her the most happy or because she actually wants it?

1. Separate checking accounts. Joint account to pay mortgage and utilities. Every guy works too damn hard for a gf or wife to go to the store spend all her money and then spend his on beauty products and such. My whole family is women and they're terrible at saving money

 

[Slash Dolo]

When I'm with someone for 10+ years and I need a tax benefit.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Because a lot of times if you meet a good woman who is easy going, even if everything is great, the relationship will come to the point where she starts pushing for a ring..

So once you get to this point several times and let a couple decent ones go because ypu wont marry them at what point are you like
"**** it lets get married?'" with someone?
Just figured at some point you'd get tired of starting again

You either have to explain to them why you don't believe in marriage or capitulate and enter into a legally binding agreement with potentially severe consequences under duress.

 

[Bible_Belt]

**** it, lets get married

I actually saw a Craigslist casual encounters ad, man seeking woman, that said just that - let's get married on the first date. I have to hand it to the guy for being original.

 

[The Duke]

But in the end, after a certain amount of time....does a woman start pushing for a ring because that's what society tells her will make her the most happy or because she actually wants it?

From my experience it is rarely because she truly wants to.
Its always one or more of these reasons:

-Feels pressure from parents.
-Her friends are all getting married.
-She's nearing a certain age and never been married.
-She is nearing her "expiration" date.
-Its what society expects.
-She believes in fairy tales.
-Financial Gain disguised as "security"!

I haven't seen one yet that did it for LOVE!

The "experts" say the average length of marriage that ends in divorce is 8yrs in the US.
And lets assume on average you could have girl friend and make it last 5yrs before she bailed due to no marriage contract.

So take your pick.....a new long term girl friend every 5yrs or a new wife every 8yrs.

 

[Yewki]

I guess.. but dont you get tired of replacing? I mean i get a new phone every year but last year I was like **** it, im used to this phone ill keep it.. figured at some point you would feel that way about a woman

Depends how important it is for you to replace one. A girl that is

The nice thing about cell phones though is when you get a new one you always upgrade. With girls it's more or less the same thing all over again

 

[cola]

You either have to explain to them why you don't believe in marriage or capitulate and enter into a legally binding agreement with potentially severe consequences under duress.

But once a prenup is on the table what do you have to lose? If shes been a good girl after 5-10 years of being together why not just give her the damn title and if she acts up divorce her.. just seems stubborn

 

[stevo]

Funny I was thinking about this some days back.

When I was married, I'd tell my single friends to never get married.

I went to a comedy show, two different comedians, one divorced, the other still married 30some years, both said to never get married.

The book I'm reading now says to not get married - before 35. Especially since you'd be at your peak then and a 35 year old woman is also cruising downhill and wrinkled.

All of these just counteract the momentary interest in getting married "soon".

Monogamy should not be the goal.

I would say this though, just like the movie FOCUS (good alpha movie btw), be yourself, when you meet a good one, a very good one with some good head on her shoulder, nurture it.

As to the sex thing and prenup for sex, that don't mean sheet to women. It's a fact, sex decreases drastically after the words are said, ask any married/divorced guy.

She doesn't have to compete with other women anymore, she knows she's your primary and only source of sex so if you leave your frame, she'd hold her punani over your head. Women don't give two sheets about what they said or signed if it doesn't benefit their immediate need.

If you stay improving yourself, stay attracting other women, you continue holding frame, she'll stay fcuking your brains out.

As to overall prenup, I like the concept of it, to feel protected especially already being divorced but prenup comes from a place of fear. Fear that someday the union would break and I don't do things from a place of fear.

If she aint worth it all, she aint worth it to begin with.

 

[BeExcellent]

Pre-nups can be broken or set aside. They are not bulletproof. I seriously doubt I'd get married again. I have no desire to co-mingle my life/children/business with a man's life/children/business. Your perspective changes greatly once you've done divorce court and been the party with a lot to lose.

 

[cola]

She doesn't have to compete with other women anymore, she knows she's your primary and only source of sex so if you leave your frame, she'd hold her punani over your head. Women don't give two sheets about what they said or signed if it doesn't benefit their immediate need.


If she aint worth it all, she aint worth it to begin with.

This is where guys mess up in a marriage. They stop working out, get fat, and then she has you, because far less women find you attractive. When you marry stay fit and hot looking and women will flirt with you infront of your wife, because women are just catty that way and this will keep her on her toes.

Furthermore just because you are married dont make her feel comfortable. Remind her when she acts up just because you married her doesn't mean you wont leave her if she stops pleasing you.

 

[PantyWhisperer]

The only happily married long term couples I've encountered are those with very conservative morals who got together out of common goals be it career-related, to start a family, etc. Almost handshake agreements where their respect and love grows over time. They can't find the same investment anywhere else.

If they got together out of passion, romance, if he had to use "game" tactics... As soon as that energy fades they get divorced or cheat.

I think the real downfall in how we view marriage is that we assume it's supposed to be "passionate"... When in human history has marriage been passionate? It was almost always a prearranged agreement between families to start a new family. Passion was injected into marriage by modern magazines.

Women nowadays expect marriage to a 40 year long hookup where he keeps inventing new ways to thrill her. He never takes me spontaneously salsa dancing or breaks out singing and tap dancing with a cane for me so I want a divorce. Pure fantasy.

This is one of the more insightful posts on this topic that I've seen so far. My first marriage was born of passion, drama and childishness and ended up with her cheating. My current marriage was built on a much stronger foundation - it always lacked the passion, but it's a solid, stable marriage and she is a great mother to my child and wife to me. She's even a great daughter in law to my parents. So many women chase butterflies and think that their marriage should be just like those books she read with Fabio on the cover.

 

[dustmuffin]

Here's a good link about what happens in a marriage when a woman doesn't want sechs....read the comments section bout how its the man's fault......
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/samantha-rodman-phd/i-save-childrens-lives-yet-my-wife-wont-have-frequent-varied-sex-with-me_b_11644430.html

It's always that mans fault.

 

[BeTheChange]

And it's his fault for allowing it to go on this long. All he simply needs to do is grab his balls if he has any left and get dressed up nice, put on his best cologne and let her know he is going out for the night.

She will get the hint REAL quick.

THIS. As far as I'm concerned consistently withholding sex is just asking to get cheated on. If you're a woman and you don't believe this then you're an idiot.