Reyaj, I don't think you're out of line here.
The number one precept of my own, the one that has saved me in countless relationships, and probably the number once concept we learn here in our dealings with women, is the notion of spinning plates.
And almost all the time when we spin plates we have to do so without telling the girls we're dating. I know of very very few quality women who would be ok with either (1) an open relationship or (2) their bf/sex partner banging other women.
At some point it would be wonderful to be faithful to one woman, but at what point does that come? If we all agree that the number 1 rule here at SS ( and probably the rule that has helped me protect my own heart the most in my relationships) is spinning plates then you will basically either
(1) cheat on every female you ever date even if it's only early on, or
(2) basically tell every girl you ever date that you want an open relationship.
And either choice is, in my opinion, morally wrong.
The question is, which immoral behavior - personally for you - is the lesser evil? And which one allows you to protect your own heart while also allowing you to make the single most important decision of your life which is who you are going to spend the rest of it with?
You can always take the equally morally reprehensible path and just tell your girl you are fvcking other women. But then if she decides to stay, and if you tell her, she will be banging other dudes and potentially expose you to a long list of STI's. And while you have control over which sexual partners you pick and how "clean" they are and you will know whether you used a condom with them or not, the same will not be true of your sexual partner. You will simply never know who she is fvcking and whether she is using any protection with them.
In my view, it is not only a matter of good common sense NEVER to tell your gf or any girl that you are banging that it is ok to fvck other people but it is downright a matter of your own life and death.
What an awesome post... Are you like the only one on this forum that gets me lol....
What you posted in this line is so true and it seems to be something that either most of this board won't admit or maybe just live in fantasies..
"And almost all the time when we spin plates we have to do so without telling the girls we're dating. I know of very very few quality women who would be ok with either (1) an open relationship or (2) their bf/sex partner banging other women."
AMEN dude!
"In my view, it is not only a matter of good common sense NEVER to tell your gf or any girl that you are banging that it is ok to fvck other people but it is downright a matter of your own life and death."
AMEN and as extreme as that statement sounds it really does put it in perspective.
I think in addition men have a biological desire to have sex with other women at some points in their life. Rather than trying to fight it or feel abnormal this biological sexual desire should be embraced. PBAJ mentioned the concubines in biblical times as a good example of how this used to be accepted. Listen the world has evolved and now there's supposedly equal rights.. and I'm all for it.. however Men and Women are bioglically different... just wired differently.
41186 or whatever posted:
I just think that this world is run on karma. Every man thinks that they can get away with it, but eventually, you'll get caught up.
Everytime I am thinking about cheating, my ex was able to read it on my face. It's just a weird things.
You can keep it up for a while, but yeah, eventually, you will get caught and if not that, you will feel guilty and spill the beans. And even if you are a sick ****, the misstress will fall in love with you and will force you to spill the beans.
Obviously, there are exceptions, but check it out, people who get away with it, get away with it because they treat it as a full time job. If that is something you are prepared to do, by all means, go for it.
I think your ex was able to read it because you felt guilty about it. You felt guilty about it because you didn't embrace it and you felt you were doing something morally wrong or even perverted. As far as the mistress....no doubt she could be an issue thats why you need to cover all your bases and tracks. This is paramount if you have a family. I do hear you about the full time job... I think that's what might deter me from this behavior as it's quite a lot of upkeep.
Glass Half Full says
Basically the modern world is led by women. Relationships in every way are completely
normally controlled
exclusively by the woman. (Briffault's Law 101.)
The "nice" side of me (which has expired after many years of female injustice and treachery) would have said "do the right thing".
Our world doesn't apply any more. Women do what they will. We have no real control over that other than the choices we make with them. They play with a loaded deck of cards.
Basically being a DJ is learning the game of living our lives, our way and not society's way in my opinion. Being in control of who controls us (only us!).
Just always keep in mind that half of marriages fail, and, how many did but were held together for the kids sake, or money? Yeah, do the math. Modern marriage is not fair anymore in most cases (I'm willing to bet 70% at least).
More proof that a man should take advantage of a sexual opportunity he desires.
