ABUSED MY GF. BREAKUP. Get her back? Help!

[EvilSpirit22]

I abused my gf because she talked to a guy who was a great friend of hers and she knew her since last 7 years and that guy had all her old numbers and came to know that he was like a brother to her.

I called her a ***** and abused her to the extent that she started crying and promised to never come back and she said she can never move on.

I apologised and almost begged her to come back but she says she hates me and has started talking to other guys on facebook but I know she's addicted to me.

What can I do to get her back? Because I know it was my mistake that I couldn't control my anger.

Help! I love her a lot. We have completed 7 months. And after every fight she was the one to call or text me first but this time its been 2 days and she hasn't called.

I called her at night I know **** move. And said sorry.

 

[( . )( . )]

I abused my gf because she talked to a guy who was a great friend of hers and she knew her since last 7 years and that guy had all her old numbers and came to know that he was like a brother to her.

I called her a ***** and abused her to the extent that she started crying and promised to never come back and she said she can never move on.

I apologised and almost begged her to come back but she says she hates me and has started talking to other guys on facebook but I know she's addicted to me.

What can I do to get her back? Because I know it was my mistake that I couldn't control my anger.

Help! I love her a lot. We have completed 7 months. And after every fight she was the one to call or text me first but this time its been 2 days and she hasn't called.

I called her at night I know **** move. And said sorry.

You tiger you. And here I was thinking "abused" to your average Indian was giving her prolonged eye contact. *Ba dum tsh* I'll be here all night.

What can I do to get her back?

Go phuck 10 other women. Men get angry (over meaningful things though usually) she will live. Don't feed her ego like that ever again.

she says she hates me and has started talking to other guys on facebook

She sounds like a real winner.

 

[El Payaso]

You lost your power when you begged her. Never, ever beg a woman. It doesn't matter what you did. You never, ever beg.

When you do something wrong such as being a jerk, insulted her or whatever. You simply let her walk away. After a day, you call her and say "Mistakes were made last night and the results were not what I intended". Do NOT apologize and start begging. Simply acknowledge your wrongdoing and let her come around on her own. If she does, fine. If she doesn't, fine. When you beg, you give her all the power.

9 times out of 10, if you've been with a woman long enough and her interest is still high because you always maintain your frame, there's nothing she won't forgive you for. If you're going down, she'll go down with you because she believes she's in love with you.

So yeah, just acknowledge your actions and let her come around on her own. I find the best apologies to be the ones where you say you're sorry without actually saying "I'm sorry".

 

[EvilSpirit22]

But I have said sorry now and even begged. What can be done now?

 

[VikingKing]

Bradd80 gave you great advice already

Op this is what you do:

1. stop acting like a girl

2. how do you do this? get a life. Find some new hobbies, start working out. I can tell you don't work out because fit guys don't b*tch and complain much, and if they do it's just a motivator to get sh*t done.

3. Once you get a life, you will be less dependent on her. How do you expect her to be addicted to you when you are the one who is so addicted to her? You need to break this addiction. Once you do this, she will start to miss you. Gradually, her desire for you will naturally grow since we as humans subconsciously want that which we cannot have, or which is just beyond our grasp.

4. The reason she is acting rudely towards you is because you keep calling her and act like she is the centre of your universe, and this for her is unappealing and kills the attraction she has for you. Once you step back, her love for you will grow again. You have to be careful not to go back to being the way you were, or else she will also go back to being the way she was (ie rude)

5. Understand that you are really in a very strong position, if only you know how to play your cards right. She lost her virginity to you, so right there she has a very strong emotional bond to you. The only way you will break this is by acting like a girl, ie being too emotionally dependent on her, calling her all the time, being whiny like a girl, not giving her space, and not being a fun guy.

6. When you are with her, focus on being fun and really good in bed. Giving women orgasms can cure A LOT of problems in a relationship, you'd be surprised.

7. Come back here and thank us for the great advice.

 

[EvilSpirit22]

Bradd80 gave you great advice already

I am doing all of this. Working out and building a life and everything was ****ing good until this **** happened. I am still working out and not giving a **** but I just don't wanna lose someone over a silly thing. And lol I know it was my fault. What should be my current plan to get her back. Call her and tell her that I know I said **** and its ok for you to react in this manner. But sometimes you need to count the good things and ignore the bad ones.

 

[VikingKing]

I am doing all of this. Working out and building a life and everything was ****ing good until this **** happened. I am still working out and not giving a **** but I just don't wanna lose someone over a silly thing. And lol I know it was my fault. What should be my current plan to get her back. Call her and tell her that I know I said **** and its ok for you to react in this manner. But sometimes you need to count the good things and ignore the bad ones.

You live in India. Many single unused women. :rockon:

Edit: Oh wait, forgot there is a shortage in India. That sucks.

 

[jake-a-roo4]

I abused my gf

Abuse is too strong of a word bro

I called her a ***** and abused her to the extent that she started crying and promised to never come back and she said she can never move on.

I apologised and almost begged her to come back

You lost your sh1t bro now she had enough. For real bro if she loved you caling her a b1tch wont make her decide to leave ya like that. She used the fight as a way out when you begged her. she wanted to leave you that was her whole plan. get it on with some other girls asap.

 

[EvilSpirit22]

@Noobology: Yeah right! But 1.2 billion population still offers a decent percentage of women.

Jake; I know man! I got all worked up and boom I flipped like a mofo. The thing is that I feel bad for making her cry. Her interest levels were pretty high before this. And a friend of mine talked to her she said that she loves me and Is waiting for me to call and lol when I call she is like I wanna sleep. Well it was 3.40am. wtf is wrong with me.


Oneitis Alert!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[VikingKing]

@Noobology: Yeah right! But 1.2 billion population still offers a decent percentage of women.

Jake; I know man! I got all worked up and boom I flipped like a mofo. The thing is that I feel bad for making her cry. Her interest levels were pretty high before this. And a friend of mine talked to her she said that she loves me and Is waiting for me to call and lol when I call she is like I wanna sleep. Well it was 3.40am. wtf is wrong with me.


Oneitis Alert!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well if you enjoy her constantly talking to tons of guys on facebook all the time, and it doesn't bother you, then you should continue pursuing this relationship.

Btw, shes probably not going to stop. She will just hide it from you.

feelings started to take over my mind I became possessive and jealous of all the other guys she was talking to on facebook. Although every time some guy asked her out she told them that I have a bf . We broke up many times but got back together in just few hours. Sometimes we fight just because of my insecurity.

I dumped my girlfriend of 7 months yesterday because she gave her number to a guy on facebook and the guy was her facebook friend since a very long time. She gave her number and didn't told me.

I later on read her facebook inbox where the guy thanked her for the number. Although she has told the guy about me and he knows it. I have seen his texts and I would categorize him as an AFC. NO POTENTIAL THREAT.

I abused my gf because she talked to a guy who was a great friend of hers and she knew her since last 7 years and that guy had all her old numbers and came to know that he was like a brother to her.

Why do you think she is ALWAYS talking to other guys whether it be face book, or on the phone, when she knows you don't like it, you probably let her know that before the incident in the first thread you made here.

Your relationship sounds very immature (both of you). She sounds like she just LOVES attention from males. So does she only want attention from them? Or does she like having other options around? If she likes having other options around, do you think she will go and explore those options?

What are your thoughts spirit?

 

[EvilSpirit22]

Well if you enjoy her constantly talking to tons of guys on facebook all the time, and it doesn't bother you, then you should continue pursuing this relationship.

Btw, shes probably not going to stop. She will just hide it from you.








Why do you think she is ALWAYS talking to other guys whether it be face book, or on the phone, when she knows you don't like it, you probably let her know that before the incident in the first thread you made here.

Your relationship sounds very immature (both of you). She sounds like she just LOVES attention from males. So does she only want attention from them? Or does she like having other options around? If she likes having other options around, do you think she will go and explore those options?

What are your thoughts spirit?

Well let me give you a little info about her. She's 18, and her parents hate her. Her dad ignores her completely. And because of this she found comfort talking to other guys. She tried dating a few guys but got bored in just a few days. 2 months being her longest relationship with any of those guys. Then we met and I escalated things pretty quickly on our first date and we became exclusive a week later. She had this smoking addiction which she later on quit because she said she loved me and would do anything for me. She stopped talking to all the other guys who were her friends. But then as months passed I became a little possessive about her and we fought many times because of me checking her facebook and phone always and picked up fights for calling her classmates for college work. Everybody in college know about our relationship. Then as the fights grew over the time our breakup periods grew longer. But every time she called up and said sorry even if it was my fault. Then I said you just can't live without me and after that things went south.

She has never given her number to a guy and this was the first time and I know that because I keep a check on her phone. One time she smoked again and I slapped her a few times then we broke up but came back together and that was a HELL because I never thought that after this she would come back.

And this time she isn't willing to come back because I think I am trying too hard as I can see the building of our relationship crumbling down into pieces because of the orbiters around her. But I know she can never find a guy like me thanks to the community.

Prior to earlier breakups I never called or texted her because I wasn't invested in her. But right now I am invested in her a lot and that's why I don't wanna lose her.

I hope it explains everything you need to advise me.

 

[EvilSpirit22]

wow nobody can help me?

 

[goldengoose]

All of these break up stories are the same. The only way you will get her back is if she will wants you back. Crying, begging, talking, trying to be nice isnt going to do sh1t for you until she decides in her own mind that you are worth going back to. Your behavior didn't help your cause any. She has other guys that she's talking to that she respects more right now. Get yourself together and work on your emotions including getting a stronger mind set. If you don't get this taken care of now it will affect your future relationships with women. Don't contact her, let her come to you, but you have to change to make it work. There are better women out there man, she isnt the only one. Start looking for new prospects because a damaged relationship is hard to repair and I don't really see her putting in the effort to do so.

 

[EvilSpirit22]

All of these break up stories are the same. The only way you will get her back is if she will wants you back. Crying, begging, talking, trying to be nice isnt going to do sh1t for you until she decides in her own mind that you are worth going back to. Your behavior didn't help your cause any. She has other guys that she's talking to that she respects more right now. Get yourself together and work on your emotions including getting a stronger mind set. If you don't get this taken care of now it will affect your future relationships with women. Don't contact her, let her come to you, but you have to change to make it work. There are better women out there man, she isnt the only one. Start looking for new prospects because a damaged relationship is hard to repair and I don't really see her putting in the effort to do so.

Yeah I talked to her on the phone and said that yes some harsh words were exchanged and I know you are hurt and blah blah. Its ok that we don't talk and I don't see if we could repair this relationship so yup your anger is acceptable and we should just move on with our lives. And then I wished her all the very best for her future and said goodbye.


But lol we are both in the same college and we will see each other almost every day so I don't know what should I do about it.

 

[DonGorgon]

its done ...let shed goo ca0use what yoiu don't know is that she was intact Fing that guy...lol yup. "best guy friend" = secrete **** buddy in 2014

He is her permanent F and the guy she wants to marry .. he knows more of here secrete than you and he knows some of the mother guys she cheated on you with.. she is not with him only cause he his smart enough too know than wing with here his foolish when he can just stay on the side lines and get easy sex..

what is have told you is the truth..take it or leave it. men need to understand and accept that there are always other men in you GF or wives life.. thats why you have too focus of the benefits she bring too you other than loyalty and commitment cause you can thane those things

 

[EvilSpirit22]

I know but I am crying right now I know it sucks but I love her a lot and its difficult for me to focus on anything right now I just ****ed up my diet for today and I am so ****ing sad right now. I gave her everything but can't she just come back to me for once and forgive me for doing that **** to her.

 

[TheVirtualMind]

I gave her everything but can't she just come back to me for once and forgive me for doing that **** to her.

And after every fight she was the one to call or text me first but this time its been 2 days and she hasn't called.

Grow up. You're 22 and you are whining like a 16 year old. You two fight a lot and she keeps coming back. This time, you two fought and she took her ball and said "to hell with you."

Like others have said, no amount of crying, whining, begging, pleading, or whatever you do will make her come back. She will come back ON HER OWN TERMS.

You two are in the same college? Tough. Man up and deal with it. Think this will be the only ex you run into? No.

Grow a pair and move on. You sound extremely immature and insecure.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

Dude, this is the girl that LIED to you about this guy. If she had nothing to hide then why did she lie?

She was lying because he said she can't have any male friends. And she wanted one.

It's like the kid who's parents won't ever let him have any candy. What happens, sooner or later, they need that sugar fix, as kids do. So they start sneaking it....and lying about it. One of my friend's growing up parent's were exactly like this. Anti- anything bad for you. Couldn't watch any R rated or PG-13 movies, or even play video games. Needless to say we spent a lot of time at my place growing up. <------And, when his parents would aks him what he did, he would LIE. I'm not sure what ended up happening to him, but I do know that his sister ended up dealing drugs at one time. Good kids, good schooling, the parents meant well and never abused them or anything like that, but sooner or later they rebelled and/or didn't take anything their parents said/taught seriously. Slippery slope

You left that part out because your emotions are lying to you. This guy is a long term fvck buddy more than likely. Most women have them.

He said she was a virgen when they met, right? Plus didn't he live out of state?

Where's Exception been at lately, I need him to get in here and back me up.

 

[EvilSpirit22]

She was lying because he said she can't have any male friends. And she wanted one.

It's like the kid who's parents won't ever let him have any candy. What happens, sooner or later, they need that sugar fix, as kids do. So they start sneaking it....and lying about it. One of my friend's growing up parent's were exactly like this. Anti- anything bad for you. Couldn't watch any R rated or PG-13 movies, or even play video games. Needless to say we spent a lot of time at my place growing up. <------And, when his parents would aks him what he did, he would LIE. I'm not sure what ended up happening to him, but I do know that his sister ended up dealing drugs at one time. Good kids, good schooling, the parents meant well and never abused them or anything like that, but sooner or later they rebelled and/or didn't take anything their parents said/taught seriously. Slippery slope


He said she was a virgen when they met, right? Plus didn't he live out of state?

Where's Exception been at lately, I need him to get in here and back me up.

Yes she is not a *****! Its just that she was living alone since a very long time and she doesn't care if anybody stays with her or not. And she was a virgin. Stays at home with her parents. Leaves house at 9am and leaves college at 4pm and goes back to home. And that guy was her classmate and it was my fault that I could not keep myself together and I was enraged. Although I read her texts they were all about me that how much she loves me. She says a lot many things but never means it like I would leave and all that ****. I know her very well and that's why I don't want to leave her because this was a small thing. An alpha would never abuse or fight with a girl just because of an AFC . I will get her back and I would try to be a little more in control because I am the one responsible for her attitude.

She's a great girl already dealing with many problems but always said that I will leave my parents to marry you.

The problem is in me. I am insecure. I know I can get any girl but I will repeat the same **** again and again. And I gotta change that. Right now.

 

[EvilSpirit22]

We met today. She hugged me and cried a lot and said that she was actually quite hurt with what i said. She bought a new number and we are back together.