How do u handle chicks that blow u off?

[Magas]

Here is my dillema. Ive been seeing this girl now for like 2 months now. We have gone out a few times etc. Messed around a bit ( no sex yet). We were supposed to go out today and she said she would call me but I have yet to hear from her nor do I think I will. She has to go to work at 4pm today so theres still an hour left till 4pm and I dont think its gonna happen. How do I handle something like this? Im not gonna call her...at least for a few days unless I hear from her first. But should I act mad or just pretend like I didnt care. As a side note to this we had plans last saturday and she cancelled on me cause she was doing something with her best friend. She was like youre gonna be mad at met etc. And I acted like I it didnt bother me too much. I did tell her that hey im not mad but dont make a habit out of cancelling plans when u have them with someone. I also feel that its necessary to say here that..I have told this girl in the past that I wanna take things slow etc. and not talk on the phone every day got out constantly cause it will just kill things for us. Im not looking for a relationship from this girl...but at the same time I think I deserve a little respect here also. Anyone have any opinions on this please post em.


Thanks
Magas

 

[Anti-Dump]

Magas,

Sounds like a 'dump' in progress. What the hell WAS she doing last saturday? Yea, right.

Protect that heart my friend.

 

[Max Kool]

Whatever you do, don't get mad - this radiates insecurity. Instead, get her on her toes by calling on your backup chick.

Works all the time.

You DO have a backup chick, don't you?

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"Character makes life immortal. It survives even death. Some say knowledge is power, but this is not true. Character is power."

 

[mellow mel]

Originally posted by Magas:
Im not gonna call her...at least for a few days unless I hear from her first.[/B]

You've got the right ideal. She blew you off so the last thing you want to do is call her, that is her job. When and if you hear from her, don't say anything. Let her squirm for a while and figure out what she needs to say to you. More than likely, it will be some lame @$$ excuse. "You never believe what happen.." Just listen to it, and don't
tell her "It's okay" or "I understand" or "I'm not mad". Don't say anything. Finally, give her a sigh and then say something like, "you know you should have called regardless if you weren't going to be able to make it, I could have made other plans If you had let me know. If we go out at this point, your going to have to plan it and make the effort because I feel like I need to ease up on the effort right now to see what your all about."

But should I act mad or just pretend like I didnt care. [/B]

Don't do either. Don't act mad. Don't pretend you didn't care. If you act mad, your showing insecurity. If you act like you dont care, she might blow you off again on a date in the future because she feels like she can get away with it. Also, women can tell when your pretending and that tells them that you aren't being totally upfront and honest with them. That's a turn off to women.


------------------
Mellow

 

[Magas]

I understand the advice you guys are giving me here. But im dying to have some closure to this ordeal here. Why u ask? Well i will feel weird when my friends ask.."hey what happened to that girl? etc..." What should I tell them..."we just stopped talking for no reason..." I dont think that sounds too good. I havent heard from this girl now for like 3 days here. I mean she hasnt given me any hints that maybe shes not interested...thats why im so friggin confused. When I last asked her to get together she was like ok. She didnt give me no lamo excuse or nothing. Somethings gotta be up here obviously...i would just like to get some closure thats all. Heres me idea..im thinking of calling her say tommorow...im not gonna ask or say anything about her not calling me. And then ask her something like "hey where do we stand here?" My guess is im not gonna get a straight answer out of her..u never seem to in these situations. I will probably end up finding out the real reason from my friend that knows her and her friends better.


Thanks for the info
Magas

 

[Krynnster]

If you need closure, the direct approach is the way to go. When you talk to her, you want to sound serious, even business-like. The mindset you should be in is that you are giving her a chance to change her evil ways before you move on to better things, not the other way.

Hope this helps...

K.

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If at first you don't succeed, don't let anybody know you've even tried - unknown.

 

[Vassago]

This is the best piece of advice I have seen in this forum. Why put all your eggs in one basket?

As far as the problem at hand, I wouldn't call her again unless she called me twice!

Originally posted by Max Kool:
Whatever you do, don't get mad - this radiates insecurity. Instead, get her on her toes by calling on your backup chick.

Works all the time.

You DO have a backup chick, don't you?

 

[NEANDERTHAL SUPERSOLDIER]

bump.

 

[SoSuave.com]

bump

 

[Hart_House]

I can relate to you Magas. I was chilling with this girl for about a month, going to shows, events and dancing. She was showing me huge IOI and giving me Kino which was great. There was no talk of a boyfriend from her when we hung out, but I knew she had a b/f from her friends talking about him. We have an awesome time together with lots of laughs. The funny thing is she never mentioned a boyfriend ever when we were together, so I figured she was looking for an upgrade.

I'm with this girl on a Saturday afternoon and I ask her what she was doing for the long weekend and she said she was busy on Sunday, so I said it's ok, I wanted to do something with you on a Monday. She said she was going to work out, so I said kewl, we can do it after you work out because the event starts at 8pm. She said she was going to be working out from 8pm to 11pm. I laugh at her and say that's kewl but she better be in an amazing shape when she's done. Next thing you know, she's throwing me a shyt test and says "that I should still go out" to see the fireworks. I respond with "I wouldn't miss it for the world".

About 5 minutes later my phone rings and one of my other target calls me, and I ask me what I'm doing, I tell her I'll meet her in an hour to talk about it. I tell the Flake that I'm off to meet someone and I will see her around. From that day on, I've never made a single effort to ask her out again. I see her often, but I don't give her any of my time or attention.

My advice to you Magas, is to use the 3 strike rule. Ask her to do something with you on 3 different occasions, in a relative short period of time. If she strikes you out all three times, you need to stop asking her out and completely ignore her.

Act yourself and have lots of fun with other girls. Act as if she's never existed in your life and that she's missing out and all this was her own decision (decline). I'm currently, ignoring this girl and when I do see her she flirts with me but I don't give her the time of day. When she sits near me I stand up and walk to another girl. This really got her upset. Which is a good sign. I like it when girls get upset, means they are starting to have feelings for you. You don't get angry if you don't feel something for someone.

Hart House

 

[Someone Much cooler]

females r flakey, ur not high on her priority list, pull a another chick, get wit her and cross the bridge of this other girl when the time cums

 

[ARrocket]

I can relate to you Magas. I was chilling with this girl for about a month, going to shows, events and dancing. She was showing me huge IOI and giving me Kino which was great. There was no talk of a boyfriend from her when we hung out, but I knew she had a b/f from her friends talking about him. We have an awesome time together with lots of laughs. The funny thing is she never mentioned a boyfriend ever when we were together, so I figured she was looking for an upgrade.

I'm with this girl on a Saturday afternoon and I ask her what she was doing for the long weekend and she said she was busy on Sunday, so I said it's ok, I wanted to do something with you on a Monday. She said she was going to work out, so I said kewl, we can do it after you work out because the event starts at 8pm. She said she was going to be working out from 8pm to 11pm. I laugh at her and say that's kewl but she better be in an amazing shape when she's done. Next thing you know, she's throwing me a shyt test and says "that I should still go out" to see the fireworks. I respond with "I wouldn't miss it for the world".

About 5 minutes later my phone rings and one of my other target calls me, and I ask me what I'm doing, I tell her I'll meet her in an hour to talk about it. I tell the Flake that I'm off to meet someone and I will see her around. From that day on, I've never made a single effort to ask her out again. I see her often, but I don't give her any of my time or attention.

My advice to you Magas, is to use the 3 strike rule. Ask her to do something with you on 3 different occasions, in a relative short period of time. If she strikes you out all three times, you need to stop asking her out and completely ignore her.

Act yourself and have lots of fun with other girls. Act as if she's never existed in your life and that she's missing out and all this was her own decision (decline). I'm currently, ignoring this girl and when I do see her she flirts with me but I don't give her the time of day. When she sits near me I stand up and walk to another girl. This really got her upset. Which is a good sign. I like it when girls get upset, means they are starting to have feelings for you. You don't get angry if you don't feel something for someone.

Hart House

Good for you man

However, I personally have a 2 strike rule

 

[CosMoenTropic]

How do I handle chicks that blow me off? "Keep sucking it baby" lol Just kidding

 

[get1]

Look I tend to agree with most of the above advice however I wouldn't use the "3 strike rule." As when interest levels are wavering asking her out and out and out again in short succession can be like leaving a needle in your arm. Take the needle out. Build the attraction up again by limiting supply. Call her up. Being a female she will expect you to try to catch up with her, ask her what she's up to this week. She'll tell you and ask you. Say you have a hectic week, dinners, lunches, your friend is down from interstate and wants you to show her around. then say, "hey, just ran into someone. call you soon." call message a bit later on. LIMIT SUPPLY!!!!!!!!!!!! over supply kills attraction..

 

[get1]

ps "How do I handle chicks that blow me off? "Keep sucking it baby" lol Just kidding " this advice i can't fault..

 

[Colossus]

If it's an overt blow-off--ONE strike yer out.

If it's seemingly sincere or maybe a fluke, I'll giver ONE more chance. 3 blow-offs in a short time (or at all) is not a coincidence.

 

[SuavePlaya]

Pick up other chicks. She will probably call you or probably not, but you will forget her faster if you just get another girl. If your tv breaks you won't sit around until it fixes itself you will just go out and buy another.

 

[Romjuan]

The advice here is actually pretty bad. I can GUARANTEE you, shes been flaky beacuse there is another guy in the picture. You have become the second string. When a girl gives you less, its because shes giving another guy more. The best thing for you to do in this situation is, DO NOTHING. Dont reply to her or reach out. Write it off as experience and relfect where it was and what you did that made her lose interest in you. My guess was when OP says, " I did tell her that hey im not mad but dont make a habit out of cancelling plans when u have them with someone. " and " I have told this girl in the past that I wanna take things slow etc. and not talk on the phone every day got out constantly cause it will just kill things for us. ". These statements make me cringe. Dont tell her that. Just do those things. Let your actions speak loud and she will follow. . Best thing to do now. Pull back. If she reaches out again, be indifferent. Dont ask her out. If she brings it up, say you forgot and its no big deal.

 

[member160761]

Damn, a post to a 20 years old thread. I was five years old when this was posted, didn't know of the internet. Wonder where OP is at in his life.

 

[AureliusMaximus]

Damn, a post to a 20 years old thread

22 years old forum thread to be exact dudebro