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Lack of REM sleep causes manic behaviors

Pierce Manhammer

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I’m in my 50’s as such my normal age targets are 35-55 and I am long term relationship minded. As such I have always had a standard set of screening criteria.

The first and most important of which is “how do you sleep?”.

You’d be amazed how many women in these age groups struggle to sleep well.

I’ve also come to the conclusion that if she sleeps like a baby she’s happier and more well adjusted.The ones that don’t are neurotic train wrecks if unmedicated. It’s kind of a no brainer.

But now there’s scientific research:

 

AmsterdamAssassin

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One of my kittens has anxieties that keep her awake and restless. She loves sleeping over at my place, where she doesn't feel anxiety and can finally sleep. There's a night/day difference between how she arrives on Friday evening and how much more balanced she is on Saturday. Even one night of restful sleep can make a huge difference.
 

Money & Muscle

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I get 6 hours of sleep on a good night, 4-5 hours on average. I have an 8 Sleep bed and it's telling me I get less than 90 mins REM nightly, most nights are about 60 mins.

So I'm basically fvcked then?
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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So I'm basically fvcked then?
Do you feel sleepy in the middle of the afternoon? Are you grouchy from sleep deprivation?

I mostly go to bed around 2 and get up at 8-9, rarely go 8 hours of sleep, but not to ill effect. Not everyone requires the same amount of sleep.
 

Money & Muscle

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Do you feel sleepy in the middle of the afternoon? Are you grouchy from sleep deprivation?
Yeah, I'm a diagnosed hypersomniac. Whether I get good sleep or not, I'm still tired. It is what it is, that's why I got the 8 Sleep bed - going to maximize my sleep for what I can manage.
 

PlatoPacks23

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Yeah, I'm a diagnosed hypersomniac. Whether I get good sleep or not, I'm still tired. It is what it is, that's why I got the 8 Sleep bed - going to maximize my sleep for what I can manage.
you need to black out the curtains/windows in your bedroom so no sunlight wakes you up and no electronics 2 hours before bed.
 

Money & Muscle

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you need to black out the curtains/windows in your bedroom so no sunlight wakes you up and no electronics 2 hours before bed.
My dude, I bought a $2,000 water cooled/heated bed cover that auto adjusts temperature based on the sleeping patterns it senses from my movement in bed, because it has sensors that can tell me what stage of sleep I'm in and for how long.

I have curtains on my windows, lol.
 

DreamAgain

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My dude, I bought a $2,000 water cooled/heated bed cover that auto adjusts temperature based on the sleeping patterns it senses from my movement in bed, because it has sensors that can tell me what stage of sleep I'm in and for how long.

I have curtains on my windows, lol.
Sorry for your suffering man. My best advice is not to overdue it with worrying about your sleep quality, and to just relax and reduce your anxieties as much as possible.

I spend some time each night analyzing how may day went, being thankful quietly for the things that went well today, and having optimism tomorrow, or any point in the near future, will go well.

Without this optimism I feel my anxiety increasing and my fears increasing as well, and it's no wonder insomnia kicks in.
 

DarwinTaurus

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I'm an insomniac, most likely due to working shift work, however, my sleep has improved *dramatically* over the past few months by the following decisions:

* Eliminating all forms of Caffeine from September 2023. No Coffee, No Iced-Coffee (which I loved), No Energy Drinks (which I used to drink a lot working shift work), No Coca-Cola, No Tea (just herbal now, such as Camomile).

* Purchasing a new King Size bed in November 2023. New amazing mattress. 1,000 thread count cotton sheets. Duck feather pillows.

* Quitting drinking Alcohol in January 2024.

These three factors have contributed greatly to my Sleep Health, and improved my REM sleep exponentially, to the point that my dreams are like coherent, logical, movie-like dreams.
 

The Duke

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When I am overloaded with work and have a ton on my mind I struggle to fall asleep. It's nothing to go on 4hrs sleep. Sometimes its like I closed my eyes and laid there for several hours. I do have a lot of shoulder and back pain. I've got a special orthopedic pillow that helps somewhat.

always been a nocturnal person. My brain really comes alive about 9-midnight, it's when I really start to figure schitt out. I can drive 10-17 hours non stop and never get tired.

I've got $600 sheets, an amazing pillow top mattress, ultra dark curtains. Sometimes I lay on top of the comforter and sleep with only a super soft blanket, That helps more than anything. I've always found comfort in soft things. Soft skin on women helps a lot.

My body gets hot and wakes me up a lot. Also my pre-work out C4 and protein shakes make me pee.

Alcohol might help me get to sleep but it always wakes me up later.

When I do wake up, my muscles are weak for 2-3hrs. No way in he11 I could work out in the morning. I don't even like to talk to people for the first few hours after waking up.

I miss the days I could fall asleep in 30min, sleep thru my loud alarm, and wake up to drool on my pillow.

I'm not into drugs but when I have a cough NyQuil sure helps me sleep.
 

DarwinTaurus

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I'm not into drugs but when I have a cough NyQuil sure helps me sleep.
Have you tried taking Valerian tablets? They are non-prescription, they can help. I've also used antihistamines such as Phenergan (again, non-prescription), because one of their side effects is causing drowsiness. Camomile Tea is meant to help sleep as well.
 

The Duke

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Have you tried taking Valerian tablets? They are non-prescription, they can help. I've also used antihistamines such as Phenergan (again, non-prescription), because one of their side effects is causing drowsiness. Camomile Tea is meant to help sleep as well.
I will look into it. Thank you.
 

DarwinTaurus

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I get 6 hours of sleep on a good night, 4-5 hours on average. I have an 8 Sleep bed and it's telling me I get less than 90 mins REM nightly, most nights are about 60 mins.

So I'm basically fvcked then?
My Sleep has been like that for 20 years. Only now in the last six months, and the changes that I've made, is it starting to get better. But I was able to survive on little sleep.

Perhaps you, like me, are a part of the "Sleep Elite"?

This article is more than 1 year old Elite sleepers: are you one of the people genetically programmed to need less sleep?
 

Pierce Manhammer

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For the past few years, my sleep hygiene was crap, doing 13 hour shifts, sometimes overnight, didn’t help. I’ve never really gotten more than six hours as an adult, if I ever slept longer, my back would hurt. This was the case even when I was at peak physical condition, and with a brand new high-quality mattress.

Over the past six months been working really hard on getting at least eight hours of sleep, one thing I began to take that really helped was CDB gummy‘s, super high-quality ones like 50 bucks a bottle. No THC. In my case they really help. The other thing that has helped is doing a workout. Two hours before I go to sleep.

I am a hot sleeper as well, I tend to sleep on top of covers with a light blanket I can move around to regulate my body heat.

I cannot even begin to explain the difference this made in my life. My recall is better. I feel better during the day and I don’t yawn all the time. My Fitbit monitors my sleep and I’ve never scored better.

I never thought it would make this much of a difference, but it certainly has.

You can also try taking 50 mg of diphenhydramine which is Benadryl.
When I am overloaded with work and have a ton on my mind I struggle to fall asleep. It's nothing to go on 4hrs sleep. Sometimes it’s like I closed my eyes and laid there for several hours. I do have a lot of shoulder and back pain. I've got a special orthopedic pillow that helps somewhat.

always been a nocturnal person. My brain really comes alive about 9-midnight, it's when I really start to figure schitt out. I can drive 10-17 hours non stop and never get tired.

I've got $600 sheets, an amazing pillow top mattress, ultra dark curtains. Sometimes I lay on top of the comforter and sleep with only a super soft blanket, That helps more than anything. I've always found comfort in soft things. Soft skin on women helps a lot.

My body gets hot and wakes me up a lot. Also my pre-work out C4 and protein shakes make me pee.

Alcohol might help me get to sleep but it always wakes me up later.

When I do wake up, my muscles are weak for 2-3hrs. No way in he11 I could work out in the morning. I don't even like to talk to people for the first few hours after waking up.

I miss the days I could fall asleep in 30min, sleep thru my loud alarm, and wake up to drool on my pillow.

I'm not into drugs but when I have a cough NyQuil sure helps me sleep.
 

Money & Muscle

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Perhaps you, like me, are a part of the "Sleep Elite"?
Personally, I don't feel like I am... but the people that know me, know how I train, what I do, etc. All say that I'd fit this category.

I feel just as rested at 6-6.5 hours as I do at 8, and I often outperform people (in gym, school, work, life) with maybe 5 hours sleep average. I start to suffer pretty hard at like 4 hours, and anything less than that I feel like a raw nerve.

I guess it's telling that I know how I respond to such sleep. Working full time with full time school, 2 hours daily commute, lifting and having a young family will do that. Only way out is through.
 

Money & Muscle

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I am a hot sleeper as well, I tend to sleep on top of covers with a light blanket I can move around to regulate my body heat.
If memory serves, you make good money - probably more than myself.

I'd look into 8 Sleep. It's a godsend and it's ruined all other beds for me. I genuinely dislike sleeping in hotels because no other bed compares.
 
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