for Pook

cutler91

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DISCLAIMER: to all pook-haters and those who will inevitably scoff at this post and continue ridiculing pook until he moves on permanently, go f*ck yourselves. I wrote this intending to send it to pook personally but then thought that maybe it could help someone else that’s been in similar situations. I know to some it’s going to be seen as ass-kissing but then I don’t give a f*ck – this is about respect. This is a thank you post, my first and last, and I’ve made a promise to myself never to respond to this thread once sent.

Ok, first of all pook this is meant directly for you. I just read a post by a guy talking about a paradigm shift of thought thanks to this site, and it’s so close to what happened to me I decided to share this with you. I could easily make this into an autobiography but will try to keep it as short and sweet as possible. Two and a half years ago I was the textbook definition of an AFC. My entire life was spent trying to please others, never embracing what it is to be a man. Tragically I think this is very common these days because how many young men have influences in their lives teaching and guiding them into manhood? Very few. My success with women was very limited, and I was extremely introverted to the point that I had a reputation for being a shut-in or ‘hermit’ as I was ridiculed. I was a complete p*ssy.

To make a long story short, I had been burned badly by three different women over my life and the last one hit the hardest. They were not long or sexual relationships at all – I was just strung along, used, and then discarded before I got anywhere or knew what hit me in each relationship. It was compounded by the fact that I was a 3-time highschool dropout, had no passion in life for anything, and a body that I absolutely hated since my early teens. I literally had zero social life (never ever went out) and was a 21 year-old boy living with his parents who had written me off as the ‘loser of the family’.

The only positive thing in my life was that I had a job at a restaurant – it gave me a reason to get up in the morning. But pretty soon even that wasn’t enough. I can’t remember the exact date but one day at work, I had an epiphany. I saw myself five, ten years from that moment and suddenly a deep sense of terror and sadness came over me. It dawned on me that nothing would change in my life until I f*ckin changed. But at the time I saw no hope at all for the future. I became so depressed, I was suicidal.

For months and months all I thought about was ending my life. What was the best way to kill myself? I decided on hanging or shotgun to the head. To give you an idea of how serious it was, I slept in an undeveloped basement where only I went, and acquired a special type of rope that would hold my weight and fixed it to a beam. I also had the shotgun shells literally a foot beside my bed ready to go with the 12-gauge neatly beside them. The only thing stopping me was the fear of actually doing it.

One day in early 2002 I decided I had enough. It was the middle of the night and my old man's winchester was ready to go. I decided to write a suicide note to maybe give my parents some comfort or to say f*ck the world, I hadn’t decided. Thinking back on this it really made logical sense to me at the time, not crazy or selfish at all. I think people that have not been to the brink of taking their own life can’t understand this. You really get to the point of numbness, not feeling pain or pleasure, and truly believe you’re doing everyone a favor by checking out.

Anyway, so I sat down to write it all out and then – nothing. Couldn’t think of a damn word to say. Then I remembered kurt cobain of nirvana, one of my favorite bands, and remembered the note he left behind when he offed himelf back in ’95. So I decided to get some ideas from that and look it up on the net one last time. I had no idea my life was about to change forever.

What happened next - to this day - I can’t recall in detail. I’ve tried many times but simply cannot remember. All I know is that somehow when I was searching for cobain’s note online, for some f*cked up reason I ended up on a site called sosuave.com at a post called the secret of the jerk. This may sound f*cked up and even like bullsh*t but I don’t care – believe me or don’t. For the next 3 hours I read and read and read. I believe in God and was raised a Christian but I’m not a religious or even church going man. And I don’t know if this was divine intervention or just a f*ckin fluke – all I know is that it stopped me literally minutes from blowing my head apart with buckshot.

For the first time I began to understand the role of nature in life. And it was like I was being revealed the truth that was so obvious to me before but never had acknowledged in my entire life. As corny as it sounds i sat back and simply devoured the revelations, insights, and inspiration! Although others had good points here and there to keep discussions going, you were the main catalyst for my transformation. I actually looked at it like a metamorphosis. Like the caterpillar becoming the butterfly.

I won’t get too much into specifics, but the main ideas that changed my life were:
1 – Embrace your testosterone
2 – Embrace your sexuality
3 – You are the prize
 

cutler91

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That’s it. It sounds insanely simple but those three thoughts, when I truly understood them in detail and applied them with full force in my life, turned me inside out. You wouldn’t believe me (or perhaps you would) if I told you the stories of how much I’ve changed. I can hardly believe it. I studied for hours every week going over all your posts and articles, along the way making my own discoveries and insights. I don’t agree with everything you say but we agree on the basics – that’s all that matters. I then applied them in my life with great intensity. So many things in my life improved that every week was like one step closer to my dreams. Because the truth is the old me died on that dark night and the new me was here to stay.

The most difficult part of the last few years has not been the insane workouts, various cosmetic improvements (teeth veneers, liposculpture, six-pack, clear skin, stylish clothes, etc.), discipline in eating six to seven times a day (I need to invest in a chicken farm), or the crashing and burning lessons from women. Not even the backlash from family, friends, and coworkers who all became extremely uncomfortable about the big change was the hardest part of it all. Most thought I went insane because I no longer tolerated **** or disrespect from anyone. It took some fights and standing up for myself when it was very difficult to do so for everyone to back the **** off. It didn’t hurt that I’ve put on about 25 lbs of muscle (stripped the bodyfat) and love powerlifting and mixed martial arts or that I was a bartender in a busy restaurant constantly around women. You’d think those closest to you would be your greatest supporters, but as I’ve learned – most people never improve their lives and hate it when you do. Like they say: change is inevitable, progress is not.

No, the single most difficult part of the whole process has been PATIENCE. When you have a vision in your mind of how you want to be and what you want your life to be like, it’s torture waiting for it. You’ve heard of watching the grass grow? How about hearing the f*ckin grass grow! I know you can relate. I came to the conclusion that lack of patience is why most people fail in so many things. Like you said in one post, ENDURE! It’s not like I was sitting around waiting to become perfect – I embraced action and risked it all no matter what – but major improvements and healing time was also necessary for me to become emotionally, socially, physically, and even spiritually sound. Like you said, I untied the knots in my mind – that’s where the real battle begins and ends.

Now drugs and counseling may have been necessary for some with my background, I’m not a doctor, but I also want to mention that I refused to take any psychological or anxiety medications of any kind during my ‘rehab’. The single difference I can only attribute to the increased testosterone from the physical training, eating, and sleeping. I also believe that the new way of thinking combined with fully embracing my sexuality somehow skyrocketed my testosterone to very high levels. It truly changes you physically and mentally. As well I’ve had absolutely no counseling other than your advice throughout my transformation. That alone is remarkable when you think about it; I was once a blink away from taking my own life – now I live through my imagination and make it my reality!

I know I’m rambling and this all sounds corny as hell but the point is that my life today is so different than two and a half years ago it’s like I’m in another world. My world. The world that I imagined, planned, and then set forth to create. A world that I have absolute passion for and will never stop striving to improve. A world full of beautiful women (ironically not even close to my main priorities but pleasant distractions nonetheless) that I never thought I could have but now bloody flock to me and motivate me even more to become a better man. Earl nightingale once said: “Success is progressively realizing a worthy ideal.” That pretty much sums it up. To OVERCOME all that stands in my way so that I become the man I truly want to be.

Now don’t get me wrong. I don’t want to give the impression of a don juan living in a perfect utopia of manhood, having orgies daily. It’s more like weekly. Joking. I’ve been through it all on my journey (your review of the seven stages from afc to dj is so accurate it’s scary) and progress always seems slow when you’re living it. I’ve learnt more about women than I ever cared to know but in the process learned more about myself than I thought possible. Ironically there are more struggles, problems, and responsibilities in my life than ever before. The difference is that I now embrace them all and rise to meet them each day with vigor. I’ve learned that you must face all your demons and overcome the motherf*ckers on a daily basis. I love new challenges and enjoy the fact that I can now face them as a man. That’s what life is all about.

Pook, you’ll never know how much your single influence has meant to me but I hope at least now you’ve got a glimpse. Thank you for everything. I just want you to know that if I died tomorrow, I’d die happy knowing I’d become a man I respect. And before you die, know that at the very least you literally saved my life and helped me achieve what I thought was impossible. No matter what happens from this day on, yours can always be considered a successful life.

Pook I regard you as a mentor and inspiration, but most importantly my friend, you are a MAN.

I’ll leave you with my favorite quote:


It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement; and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.
Theodore Roosevelt
 

2xp

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congrats cutler

i was thinking if sosuave change people's live, there would be in 10/20/30 years world-class CEOs, presidents, artists, sportsmen, great artists who become what they are thanks to suave.com amongst a world full of lazy people
maybe we need a sign or a symbol so that we'd recognize ourselves. :D just joking
 
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I didn't read your post. I do want to comment on something.

If your going to stand up for somebody don't do it from the dark. Step into the light. You created a new screen name to hide your true identity or your using a 2nd screen name.

Thats punkish. You only have 2 posts on this screen name pal. That was your mistake. I am sick of people doing cowardly stuff like this. It's ok to speak out for Pook as who you normally come onto this site as...you dig.


Oh mod's know what your ip address is. If one of them wanted to invest the time into it they can tell us who you truely are.
 

CyranoDeBergerac

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Originally posted by Player_Supreme
I didn't read your post. I do want to comment on something.

If your going to stand up for somebody don't do it from the dark. Step into the light. You created a new screen name to hide your true identity or your using a 2nd screen name.

Thats punkish. You only have 2 posts on this screen name pal. That was your mistake. I am sick of people doing cowardly stuff like this. It's ok to speak out for Pook as who you normally come onto this site as...you dig.


Oh mod's know what your ip address is. If one of them wanted to invest the time into it they can tell us who you truely are.
Or it could be he's a newb and never posted before.

Man, it must get real boring knowing everything, huh?:rolleyes:
 

Create self-fulfilling prophecies. Always assume the positive. Assume she likes you. Assume she wants to talk to you. Assume she wants to go out with you. When you think positive, positive things happen.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Duke

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Yikes, Cutler, your story sent chills down my spine. Pookster definitely jumpstarted me on my self-improvement journey as well.

While we're dropping names, might as well mention Photo1 and Senor/Mister Fingers.

I think Pook's availability and popularity is responsible for the guys that don't like him. Seriously, some people will just start disliking something JUST BECAUSE most people like it. Pook gets all the respect I can muster.

Like you, Cutler, sosuave was a turning point in my life. I wasn't suicidal, but I was totally unsatisfied with the direction of my life. Sosuave put things into perspective and made me realize my worth as a human being and as a man. For that, I am eternally grateful to this site, to David D, to Allen, to Pook, to Photo1, to Senor/Mister Fingers, to all my sosuave AIM buddies, and to everyone on this site who's ever helped me.

Damn, *big hug*!
 

SOLDIERM16

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U know what? if it wasnt for this site. Id be in hell. I got an ulsur from a woman a couple of weeks ago. All because she put me in the friends-zone. And she stood me up. The morning after, i woke up to stomach problems. I went to the restroom and there was blood in my stool. I knew i had let this AFC'ness go too far. The next morning i found this site. And because of all the info,smiling, and good feelings i have learned, etc... i have been pretty much stress free.... And im even breaking out of the friends-zone as fast as can be. She wants me, and i know that i can deal without her if i want.

All i can do is thank everyone who has given the time to unselfishly post every bit of useful information they can to help improve this world. Ive never seen a place where a bunch of men can honestly promote positive values like this. All u DJ's are truly good MEN. And the world can use more REAL MEN like US in the world. We can do good. And we will do good. Thank you all.
 

Titus

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Originally posted by cutler91
You are the prize
Capitalistic, arent we?
It seems doc love's articles went to you head...

Just a fair suggestion to all of you guys out there who think the same way:
WHEN YOU TIGHTEN THE RULES OF THE GAME ON OTHERS, THEY TIGHTEN IT BACK ON YOU!

I hope at least a few of you "DJ" boys understand what the sentance above means in a wider meaning, not just concerning your own dillywackers.
 

Beethoven

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Re: Re: for Pook

Originally posted by Titus
WHEN YOU TIGHTEN THE RULES OF THE GAME ON OTHERS, THEY TIGHTEN IT BACK ON YOU!
Welcome to the evolutionary arms race, Titus.

I don't like it much either, but it's how things seem to work. There's not enough hot girls to go round, and life isn't 'fair'.
 

Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Titus

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Re: Re: Re: for Pook

Originally posted by Beethoven
Welcome to the evolutionary arms race, Titus.

I don't like it much either, but it's how things seem to work. There's not enough hot girls to go round, and life isn't 'fair'.
Evolutionary arms race? EVOLUTIONARY ARMS RACE?! MAN, ARE YOU FUKKIN INSANE????

Evolution is adaptation! It takes millions of years and it's natural! It replaces old ways of living/feeding processes so they can adapt and survive with new living/feeding processes. What was before and after is both nautral just as it is natural for us to eat, syht, fukk or sleep!

And you compare that with capitalistic brainwashing??? (no, something that is definitly NOT natural)
You really do deserve to call yourself a "DJ"

Good luck in your life. You will need it with that kind of thinking i can assure you.
 

Beethoven

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Re: Re: Re: Re: for Pook

Originally posted by Titus
Evolution is adaptation! It takes millions of years and it's natural! It replaces old ways of living/feeding processes so they can adapt and survive with new living/feeding processes. What was before and after is both nautral just as it is natural for us to eat, syht, fukk or sleep!

And you compare that with capitalistic brainwashing??? (no, something that is definitly NOT natural)
You really do deserve to call yourself a "DJ"

Good luck in your life. You will need it with that kind of thinking i can assure you.
I'd discuss this further, but it's besides the point... I'm real glad that this guy has turned his life around, props to him!
 

Alexis Zorba

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capitalistic brainwashing
UUU capitalism, the big bad evil system responsible for all the things that are wrong in our world...:rolleyes:
 

WestCoaster

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Again: The U.S. society is AFC

Great initial post. Not sure the problems you had with other guys on this board, but I liked this post. I didn't get through the second one.

As I've said numerous times, we are inundated daily with AFC messages from TV, billboards, radio commercials, print media, our friends, women, and sometimes sadly our parents.

We've been taught the wrong things.

We get confusing messages left and right, that we're supposed to surrender ourselves to women ... I see the latest AFC movie out appears to be "The Notebook."

We're taught to give up our manhood, our career, our passions and hobbies, all for women; and all for the dream of marriage, an institution that definitely needs fixing in the U.S.A.

And it goes so far as this post shows, attempted or at least thoughts of suicide. Why? Well, mostly because of our desire to give up everything for women, like society drills into our heads.

Glad you pulled out of it, and great job sosuave.com.

Too bad this is the only information out there on how to honor yourself and take ownership of your own life -- with our without a woman.
 

Do not be too easy. If you are too easy to get, she will not want you. If you are too easy to keep, she will lose interest in you. If you are too easy to control, she will not respect you.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

chicksrock

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Cutler, you have re-confirmed to me how powerful the material on sosauve and what pook says is.
I feel the same you do in many ways...

I think one really has to be suicidal at one stage, and then dramatically turn things around....

Keep up the good work
 

waldo

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Originally posted by 2xp
congrats cutler

i was thinking if sosuave change people's live, there would be in 10/20/30 years world-class CEOs, presidents, artists, sportsmen, great artists who become what they are thanks to suave.com amongst a world full of lazy people
maybe we need a sign or a symbol so that we'd recognize ourselves. :D just joking

How about a secret SoSuave DJ handshake?! :D
 

waldo

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That was good to read cutler91, don't worry about creating a new screenname, it's no big deal whatever anyone says.

I've never been in quite the same situation, but I do know SoSuave has changed my life, especially when it comes to women.
 

Dirtheart

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Well, I am impressed. Personally I have paid more attention to the threads and responses on this board than to Pook and the DJ Bible. In fact, I think there is a lot of VERY underrated advice in the tips section that doesn't appear in the Bible.

But generally I extend my personal gratitude to everyone on this board who has posted advice and shared the experience of their failures. This time last year I was at the lowest point of my life where suicide was an option I had considered. I got through that without this board that time, but it was a very painful 6 months! Earlier this year I almost fell back into the spiral, and this board saved me just before I did.

I didn't get the advice I wanted to hear, but I got the hard truth and an invaluable insight into issues that had held me back for half of my life! I have been an avid poster and reader since, have applied so much of what I have learned and have seen startling results. I hope I can go on to inspire others in much the same way.

Posts like this just go to show the value of this site and the people on it.
 

Spike_the_cowboy

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Pook - Theres only one!

Posts like this are what keep me comming back. :cool:
 

Do not be too easy. If you are too easy to get, she will not want you. If you are too easy to keep, she will lose interest in you. If you are too easy to control, she will not respect you.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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