Being "alpha" is not all it's cracked up to be

Darth · Feb 15, 2013

So I have gone through some personal changes and have basically became "alpha" or "hot" or "top 1% of men" or whatever you want to call it if you're an egomaniac, I don't see myself that way.

I see people on here striving to be that way but let me tell you it is not all fun and games.

Actually it's extremely annoying and genuinely irritating because you get these fat old ladies (who you have no interest whatsoever in) touching you and just invading your personal space.

You get interest from EVERYBODY- and as you know, 90% of the female population is unattractive, middle aged or elderly, single moms, divorced, etc.

And they're all having hot flashes, taking up a bunch of your time (wasting your time running at the mouth with pointless conversation just so they can keep you talking to them so they can look at you), and the TOUCHING! It is so damned annoying, Im ready to kill somebody. But then I'd look like an *******. So I have to alternate frowning and smiling/laughing politely so I don't come across as a jackass.

It is really, really annoying I am telling you. Sure it is nice to be able to attract the models/actresses, etc. but when you are a magnet you attract every single little scrap of metal whether you are trying to or not (and 99% of the time that's not what I'm trying to do. I'm trying to get a cup of coffee, or buy a newspaper, or minding my own business without people constantly intruding on you.

Watch this clip again of Jason Statham.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dD7qdNqozOs

Do you see the irritation on his face when the girls start rambling on about bull**** and having hot flashes? That isn't for the purpose of "gaming" women. He is genuinely annoyed at them. I know exactly how he feels. We should have a beer sometime, lol.

Anyway, if you want to truly work on all of your psychological hangups to get to this point, I salute you--but be aware that once you get there, there are other problems to contend with. Life is never perfect. Darth out.

goundra · Feb 15, 2013

to me, jason and Bruce Willis, even when young, look real routine/plain. Chris Reeves, Pierce Brosnan had/have them beaten by miles.

Darth · Feb 15, 2013

^^Based on what I've seen, it's not the physical looks that attract women so much as the personality.

Your ability to attract women is directly related to how threatening you are to other men. Imagine yourself in a giant boxing ring with all of the world's men. Would you be a threat to them? Or would you be running for the nearest exit? This is what attraction is all about IMO- the more threatening a presence you are in relation to other men, the more attractive you are. If you want a quick way to improve your attraction to women, you should actually hang out with other dudes and try to be the best dude- play soccer or rugby or something (although it occurs to me that if you are trying to be better than others as a goal you will never hit the highest level. I don't try to be better than others, I don't care).

This experience is so weird, though. From repelling everyone to attracting everyone in one lifetime.

You find yourself trying to dress down, worse than you used to dress, just so you can feel more normal and more anonymous- but it doesn't work.

Whereas I used to have equal friendships with dudes, now 85% of them turn into servants around me, running to and fro and giving me things I don't even want as if I am holding a gun and they are trying to appease me so I don't shoot them. It's bizarre. The other 13% hate my guts. I'm estimating around 2% who act like normal people around me. It is kind of sad.

Ironically, the most competition I have gotten from guys have been in the 70s or 80s. My theory is that they remember the old culture when there were a lot more masculine men walking around and masculinity was valued, and so they instantly go into "hardass" mode.

Just tonight I was talking with a guy, must have been around 80. He tried to intimidate me with a boy scout handshake, holding it there for seconds and staring me right in the eyes. I stared back and laughed. Then he started talking to me but started using a threatening tone (I detected an attempt to control me, to boss me, to assert dominance). So I put a little anger into my voice, a little more threatening.

And there was a crowd just hanging around watching this, including the old dude's wife. It was like they were watching a fist fight to see who was more of a man.

I won at the very end when we were both silent and he was the first one to speak. But we were similarly matched. It was annoying though that he was trying to dominate me because he saw me as a threat. I don't see anyone as a threat, just trying to be friendly with everybody and make things as normal as possible.

But this is the world you live in as an "alpha"- vastly different from normal,more animalistic in many ways.

Thing long and hard before taking this path! (it's worth it though).

German Soldier · Feb 15, 2013

Real smart. Threatening other men. That's really going to get you somewhere in life.

Darth · Feb 15, 2013

^^(13% who hate my guts)

Actually I was not threatening him jackass, I was simply responding naturally to his own aggression rather than trying to suppress my anger.

Thank you for playing. Have a nice night.

German Soldier · Feb 15, 2013

"Your ability to attract women is directly related to how threatening you are to other men."

Packers2010 · Feb 16, 2013

Darth said:
^^Based on what I've seen, it's not the physical looks that attract women so much as the personality.

Your ability to attract women is directly related to how threatening you are to other men. Imagine yourself in a giant boxing ring with all of the world's men. Would you be a threat to them? Or would you be running for the nearest exit? This is what attraction is all about IMO- the more threatening a presence you are in relation to other men, the more attractive you are. If you want a quick way to improve your attraction to women, you should actually hang out with other dudes and try to be the best dude- play soccer or rugby or something (although it occurs to me that if you are trying to be better than others as a goal you will never hit the highest level. I don't try to be better than others, I don't care).

This experience is so weird, though. From repelling everyone to attracting everyone in one lifetime.

You find yourself trying to dress down, worse than you used to dress, just so you can feel more normal and more anonymous- but it doesn't work.

Whereas I used to have equal friendships with dudes, now 85% of them turn into servants around me, running to and fro and giving me things I don't even want as if I am holding a gun and they are trying to appease me so I don't shoot them. It's bizarre. The other 13% hate my guts. I'm estimating around 2% who act like normal people around me. It is kind of sad.

Ironically, the most competition I have gotten from guys have been in the 70s or 80s. My theory is that they remember the old culture when there were a lot more masculine men walking around and masculinity was valued, and so they instantly go into "hardass" mode.

Just tonight I was talking with a guy, must have been around 80. He tried to intimidate me with a boy scout handshake, holding it there for seconds and staring me right in the eyes. I stared back and laughed. Then he started talking to me but started using a threatening tone (I detected an attempt to control me, to boss me, to assert dominance). So I put a little anger into my voice, a little more threatening.

And there was a crowd just hanging around watching this, including the old dude's wife. It was like they were watching a fist fight to see who was more of a man.

I won at the very end when we were both silent and he was the first one to speak. But we were similarly matched. It was annoying though that he was trying to dominate me because he saw me as a threat. I don't see anyone as a threat, just trying to be friendly with everybody and make things as normal as possible.

But this is the world you live in as an "alpha"- vastly different from normal,more animalistic in many ways.

Thing long and hard before taking this path! (it's worth it though).

this is what it is like here in perth.. but 10000 times worse. cos all dudes do is drink then want to fight you. they are protective to the hilt. i mean.. i remember one time i was talking to a girl and she brought her bf into the convo.

he started getting angry at me and was staring me down. i mean.. she he has to protect his property, but he doesn't have to be like that.

i guess maybe i was just scare of him. first time anything like that happened. i obvs just ejected the set because there is no point me going after a girl who is taken.

nroug7 · Feb 16, 2013

If you say you are an alpha, then in my honest opinion you aren't alpha.
The reasoning behind my logic is simple, by saying you are alpha you have set yourself a role, a mental barrier that separates you from other things.
Live without boundaries, without definition placed by others.

zekko · Feb 16, 2013

When someone comes on here and says they are in the "top 1% of men" I get a little suspicious, epecially when that claim comes from a 22 year old kid.

I do agree that real dominance comes from how dominant you are over other men. Any normal beta dude should be able to be dominant over a woman. Think about it, if women want the big, strong man for protection, the guy should be able to defeat most other men in battle. Otherwise, why would she feel safe?

Slickster · Feb 16, 2013

You can't be very alpha if you are letting fat old grannies get you down.

alpha_ash · Feb 16, 2013

nroug7 said:
If you say you are an alpha, then in my honest opinion you aren't alpha.
The reasoning behind my logic is simple, by saying you are alpha you have set yourself a role, a mental barrier that separates you from other things.
Live without boundaries, without definition placed by others.

Awe ****! That means I'm not alpha????!!! I gotta come back with a different username. How about AFCAsh?

goodfoot · Feb 16, 2013

Wow, that was painful to watch

Darth · Feb 16, 2013

Packers2010 said:
this is what it is like here in perth.. but 10000 times worse. cos all dudes do is drink then want to fight you. they are protective to the hilt. i mean.. i remember one time i was talking to a girl and she brought her bf into the convo.

he started getting angry at me and was staring me down. i mean.. she he has to protect his property, but he doesn't have to be like that.

i guess maybe i was just scare of him. first time anything like that happened. i obvs just ejected the set because there is no point me going after a girl who is taken.

That's OK dude. We all start somewhere and at least you are getting out there in the real world approaching girls in an honest manner. Thanks for your post.

Nah I'm not in the top 1% of men but gosh to watch people react to me they seem to think I am. I see myself as average quite honestly.

zekko · Feb 16, 2013

Darth said:
Nah I'm not in the top 1% of men but gosh to watch people react to me they seem to think I am. I see myself as average quite honestly.

I like your posts, Darth, you have some good insights. And most importantly you actually think for yourself, which is something I really appreciate, especially around here where it seems like most posters just parrot what other people say.

This thread is pretty funny though. AMOGing 80 year old men? Lol.

Darth · Feb 16, 2013

zekko said:
This thread is pretty funny though. AMOGing 80 year old men? Lol.

It was a sight to behold. LOL

Kbomb · Feb 16, 2013

This thread is the tits. Love a good old fashioned mirror.

Darth · Feb 21, 2013

Another annoying part about being "alpha" for those who are curious is that every once in awhile someone will get a hot head (or jealousy maybe?) and try to take you on directly or do some subtle almost-putdown in order to knock you from your perch. You must then swat them down which I don't like any more than anybody else because all men are my brothers and I love them all. It grows tiring to have to do this but I guess it comes with the territory.

user43770 · Feb 21, 2013

I can't tell if you're being serious or just trolling.

Either way, it's humourous.

Darth · Feb 21, 2013

Hahaha...still ticked that I kicked your a$$, fatso?

user43770 · Feb 21, 2013

You're so alpha, bro. I can tell because of the excessive name calling and constant need to prove yourself. On an internet forum.

Being "alpha" is not all it's cracked up to be

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