walk away

backbreaker

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I'm going to tell you now, i now i'm not ever going to win a spelling bee lol, but i'm i'm particularly tired today and dont' feel like going over this but i really wanted to talk about this beucase I think it's important.


Look, I'm not gonna lie and say that **** is in our favor out there in the ongoing dating war. It' s not. women have all sorts of weapons to their disposal.




however, as a man, you have one weapon, that if used correctly, is the ultimate game changer.


And that weapon, is the ability to get up and walk away


Now we talk about this a lot here. However, I dont' think most people understand the premise behind walking away and why it's such a deadly weapon. Most guys when you tell them to walk away, they think of it in terms of getting the girl that they are walking away back. In other words, "yeah, if i go no contact she will see i have other options and blah blah blah", etc. no. that's the polar opposite effect of what you are going for.


Out of everything on this site, this was probably, the most important thing that i have learned, for a multitude of reasons that i will attempt to half ass explain.

1. setting standards,rules, and taking the ball and going home when they aren't meat, are the building blocks to self esteem.

The results aren't tangible. at least not at first, they wont' get you laid. they won't get you numbers. From an AFC, ****, even a DJ standpoint, it's conuterintutitive. If the point is to get ass, why am i walking away from it? this is a very logical question.

I have an extremely high opinion of myself. Partly because I do things on a daily basis that allows me to pat myself on the back. But also beucase, I refuse to let any0one in my life, who can possibly lower it.
every woman i dated/plate i spun got placed on a see-saw, and the milisecond that the woman rose higher than my self esteem which is on the other end of the sea-saw, i would jump off.


2. It gets rid of minutiae information and allows you to focus only on relevant information

the best way I can explain this is to use an example from my web design business.

for 2 years give or take, i sold **** the same way. i would introduce myself, give a bold sales pitch, pick 4-5 sites out of our portofilo that i thought best fit, hten tell some additional information about what we do. and I mean, this worked. But i never really liked this approach. Mostly beucse this is not how i think mentally. I hate having to boil down a 5-6 thousand dollar project to 5-6 sites and then "hope" they can figure out that this site has this functionality it that you want in your site, etc.


but see.. that's only part of it. here is the real dilemma. what i really liked to do, is to take all of the functionality in a site, say a site is an ecommerce site that has a video on the home page and ales shirts.. i would take 4-5 of our best designs, i would take 4-5 ecommerce sites, i would take 4-5 sites that we built video players in, then i would flip it and give them admin access to a site just like theirs and show point by point how they will manage all of this.. this takes about 2 hours to do right.


now with that laid out you can see my delimia. most people aren't going to bother reading a response that takes 10 minutes to read. tl;dr. and the only way i coudl get the clients is to dumb down my approach and i hate dumbing down ****.


Then one day i got.. actually.. my wife got an idea... backbreaker, why don't you take a sheet and pick your 10 fav jobs /clients and write down as much as you can about each job, what you liked, what the client was like and see if you can find any similarities between them. so I did this and lo and behold it took me all of 30 minutes to realize there was a very distinct pattern between all of my fav clients. all were extremely tech savvy. all knew wht they wanted to a T. all were just as much or at least, very much detail oriented / meticulous people, people who would send me feedback on jobs that was 3-5 pages long every daythen i flipped it and i said what are some of the characteristics from some of my worst clients... so i added things like, most had been on 3-4 programmers before us, most had ****ty attitudes, most were cheap as **** most were hellbent on using platforms that their sites weren't the intention of the platform to be built on (i.e a guy wanting a 4, 000 dollar adult website built on wordpress beucase his brother's wife built a 5 page business website on wordpress and she likes how easy it is to manage and well that's what i want lol)to make a long story short, i put all this info together and came up with a pretty detailed checklist. then i had another Epiphany and realized, that not only could i target my clients.. the sales pitch feedback that i was taking in and adjusting for.. none of this feedback came from these people.

in other words, i was making adjustments to my game for pepole who i didn't' even want to sale.

Not only did I start doing my sales pitch how i wanted to do it, but i used to spend all day long talking to clients. now i might.. might talk to 2. lol but i will sale one. I'm going to close 50% of all the clients i talk to because i know exactly who I'm talking to now, i know how they think for the most part, i know what they are looking for in a design company i know what's important and what' snot. i am not coming with some generic sales pitch beucase i don't deal with generic clients anymore. i am not trying to have a one size fits all sales policy.


This sounds utterly rediclous when you asy it out loud, but 90% of you do the same thing with women.

how does this apply to game bakcbreaker you might be asking right now. simple... ghetto women never did really like me too much. this used to beat me up when i used to get rejected by really cute black chicks in the past. but yo know as i got older and more experience i realized, that i never meshed ell with them anyway. we are just too different. so i stopped giving a **** about whatever feedback they had for me.


I'm not a party guy/animal. never have been, never will be. so i really don't give a **** what the 22 year old party girl thinks about me because she's not my type. i'm not going to waste my time imputing any data into my database about what it takes to get a girl that i know at the end of the day i don't even want. I don't like thick women. so even though honestly.. i don't have the biggest **** on the face of the earth, i don't really get small **** jokes beucse i am not fighting through 20 pounds of fat to get to your coon. my **** is big enough for the girls (girl) i ****. why get your self esteem hurt by taking into consideration feedback from a girl that you aren't even compatible with ?


anyway, that's what i got for you today. walk away. walk away beucase it allows ou to build self esteem. walk away beucase it allows ou to only consider data from sane women who are interested in you and who are comp table with you.
 

Purefilth

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I agree, I used to scrabble and bargain to pick up any work I could, dropping prices, doing extras for free. The first time i stood up, said **** it, find another contractor, I'm not dealing with this **** anymore was so liberating.

Walking away from a woman is just as liberating, hell it even feels like floating sometimes, when you say to yourself "Self, she is a fittie - but fuuuuck this!"

Sadly there are so many who wont walk away - clutching at the tiniest straws of IOI's desperate for this woman for she showed interest a month ago, so she must be 'the one'.

Well said BB - pick your **** up, and walk away.
 

Fatal Jay

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Back breaker,I applaud you

Because that's the one and most powerful weapon is blowing the girl off and walking away

And trust me women are so use to afc behavior that their not use to that, they are use to the begging and whining for the girl to get her act together or come back
 

Harry Wilmington

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Ah, backbreaker, backbreaker....

Love this post, and I agreee 100%. Ironically enough, I have also found that, even if you're with the right girl, if she starts acting up and you walk away - and are able to do it with the thought that you really ARE walking away and don't care if they come back or not - if she DOES decide to come back (or you decide to take her back), her attitude is much better 'cause she now knows she can LOSE you if she's not acting the right way.

More guys should really become okay with being by themselves in the first place, then they wouldn't cling on to all these false-hope girls.
 

JohnChops

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Harry Wilmington said:
Ah, backbreaker, backbreaker....

Love this post, and I agreee 100%. Ironically enough, I have also found that, even if you're with the right girl, if she starts acting up and you walk away - and are able to do it with the thought that you really ARE walking away and don't care if they come back or not - if she DOES decide to come back (or you decide to take her back), her attitude is much better 'cause she now knows she can LOSE you if she's not acting the right way.

More guys should really become okay with being by themselves in the first place, then they wouldn't cling on to all these false-hope girls.
Yessssir to the bold. Be comfy in your skin and if a girl doesnt like who you are, if you fake sh1t how will it ever workout? Think!

Also Jophils walk away post is the king of walk aways. Go read it, its in the mature mans forum in the stickies. Freaking amazing and funny :D
 
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