Depression and avoiding women

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DonGorgon

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I have 2 main FBs and one casual F...

I am prone to depressive bouts where i become very dysfunctional and disconnected in all aspects of my life. I have found that when i am in one of these times i become terrible with women, my speech is off and my character becomes very dark and literal which illiminates my sense of humor.

So I will not say the right things that keep them interested and ultimately i damage the relationships but i dont care cause im in a disconnected mood. Im typing this to advise other members here who have similar depression issues to avoid your main hos during your low time so that you dont loose them.

Aside from that i have a new cute co worker that i am clicking with she is super cool and thus has many dudes after her. we became cool very fast and have been to lunch two times already and she payed .. we have decided to hang out after work next week.. Im actually not running any game on her at all just being kool .. i hope it can turn into something since she is the type i like but its doubtful to happen ...

Im getting older and tired of hos and really would like a companion but its soo damn hard to find even though i am tall ok looking educated and employed.. I get nothing form hos laying in my bead naked lying to their boyfriends. :(
 
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mikeyb

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Maybe see a professional to get rid of the depression? As you said you're gonna have trouble being in a "steady" relationship if you're all over the place. And BTW, a co-worker?? :nono:
 
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Maxtro

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Wow, why would you be depressed? You have three women you are regularly having sex with.

I believe 100% that women are the cure to my depression so to hear that a man is depressed while he has women is puzzling.
 
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GetOveIT

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Having women isnt a cure to all things :crackup:
 
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Mister T

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you have depression.

We all go through phases of that in our lives.

The important thing to ask yourself is --- is it clinical depression (major depression) or just "depression" (like sadness).

How long has this been going on and what have you done to iron it out?

Do you exercise? Do you eat clean? Do you have a good support group (FAMILY, "BRO" FRIENDS, etc.)?

We're social beings, and the most important thing is that you have a gang (not a literal gang) of friends to hang out on a weekend or afternoon kind of basis, and have a purpose in life.

Do you have a purpose besides sex? Sex is only a fraction of your life, probably 1/20th of what compromises it, so you have to be fulfilled in other aspects too.

I think for most men, that means being someone solid in life (has a definite goal --- probably a job/profession) which is a good first step.

It just requires a little hard work (which is hard to muster up when you're depressed admittedly), and though I am averse to medications, maybe taking some antidepressants for a short period to get you through a rough patch in life may help but ask a medical professional if you think you need that. You may also want to get tested to see if you just have "Low energy" i.e. because of hypothyroidism which is very common.
 
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Sandow

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I find I'm happiest when I have a good balance in life. Friends, family, girls, work, self-appearance. Yea it's hard to balance all these out perfectly, but if you put a lot of effort in all these aspects you can come pretty close and you'll find that you are much happier.

I been in your position before, after awhile, banging the same 'ol hoes gets old. You'll start asking yourself what's the meaning of all this? You'll want more substance, something more meaningful.

But once you get settled down, you'll start wanting to go out more, meeting new girls. The girl you're dating starts getting boring and repetitive...every damn girl on the street is looking hot, and soon you're over it. The cycle goes on and on.

Like I said, for me, everything is a balance. Put time and effort into the things that are important to you. If you're doing too much of one thing, start focusing on something else to balance things out.

Also you may wanna see your doctor about some anti-depressants. I got on some and it made a huge difference on my outlook, I stopped becoming result-oriented and began appreciating the finer things.
 
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Kerpal

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Maxtro said:
Wow, why would you be depressed? You have three women you are regularly having sex with.

I believe 100% that women are the cure to my depression so to hear that a man is depressed while he has women is puzzling.
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I wish you were right. If you're depressed and you think finding a woman to **** is going to fix your depression, you're in for a nasty surprise :(
 
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Igetit!

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Kerpal said:
I wish you were right. If you're depressed and you think finding a woman to **** is going to fix your depression, you're in for a nasty surprise :(
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+1 rep Kerpal.



This is EXACTLY what I was thinking when I read Maxtro's reply.


If you're down or have some type of depression in your life,I don't see how some chick making you have an orgasm will "magically" make eveything right in your world.



The sex may feel good and you might have a moment of excitement while the encounter is going on,but once it's over and the girl has gone home,you're still left alone to face whatever it is that's causing you to be depressed.


A "hot" girl may temporarily distract you from problems,but she won't fix them.
And if she hangs around long enough,eventually she may even add to them.




You need to change the way you think Maxtro.
 
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Maxtro

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The problem is that I basically have everything I want in my life, except for women. It's the only piece of the puzzle missing.

I've never had any sexual intimacy in my life, which I believe is the reason for the depression. I have no reason to doubt that getting the need fulfilled will make me feel better.

BTW sex and sexual intimacy is a need in order feel good and have mental stability. I present Exhibit A

And no, I'm not talking about just sex. I could get a hooker today, feel good tomorrow but feel down again the day after. Of course I could get a hooker that day too, but that's just a quick way to being completely broke.

It's about sex, connection and companionship.

Another aspect is the sense of accomplishment that comes after achieving a goal. That's how confidence develops.
 
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DonGorgon

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The thing is that i know what my issues are.. they have been there for many years and no i am not on any medication for it nor am i seeing a shrink, i just try to function best i can but yes it does get worse and harder and harder over time..

Sex does not cure depression it simply provides a moment of euphoria that when over can often leave you feeling emptier than before. I have hos and access to sex but in the end i am left with me...lol

One of my FBs is my good friend but women cannot process sympathy or empathy for men they are romantically involved with so she cant relate to my situation at all.. nor should she have to ..

I would ay its once per month that i get like this but it does linger .. I am not looking for pitty .. just wanted to warn other members that depression destroys your game and relationships with women.
 
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S0LID

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Ah that sucks man... but hey, if you've got fbs, you've clearly got some skill with women :)

I don't know what it is with me... I'm just getting over the flu, and my brain is warped... My sense of humor isn't working, and I haven't got the energy to even think of dating despite having a few options. I'm not depressed, but sometimes it's like my brain switches off.... How annoying would this be if it turns out these are early symptoms of AIDS.

Anyways I need to make 2010 a good year, which means doing things even if I feel at 20%.
 
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Bladerunner

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If you think your depression could be clinical, go see a licensed therapist or psychiatrist. They could really help you, and there is zero shame in seeking out help when you need it. If your depression is that debilitating, sounds like you do.
 
DonJuanit0

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Maybe you should have more goals in your life?!? How about reading? When I had the same feeling a while back my father advised me to read a book and it really helped me understand things like, I should always have goals and not wishes!

I think your problem is that you THINK you have conquered everything besides a good woman! Find other interests !

The tittle of the book I read is "Alchemist" of Paulo Coelho! It will help you understand that you have to chase after other things in life and everything will come while you're after your goals! Give it a try...
 
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DonGorgon

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S0LID said:
Ah that sucks man... but hey, if you've got fbs, you've clearly got some skill with women :)

I don't know what it is with me... I'm just getting over the flu, and my brain is warped... My sense of humor isn't working, and I haven't got the energy to even think of dating despite having a few options. I'm not depressed, but sometimes it's like my brain switches off.... How annoying would this be if it turns out these are early symptoms of AIDS.

Anyways I need to make 2010 a good year, which means doing things even if I feel at 20%.
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if you worried get tested..lol
 
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DonGorgon

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DonJuanit0 said:
Maybe you should have more goals in your life?!? How about reading? When I had the same feeling a while back my father advised me to read a book and it really helped me understand things like, I should always have goals and not wishes!

I think your problem is that you THINK you have conquered everything besides a good woman! Find other interests !

The tittle of the book I read is "Alchemist" of Paulo Coelho! It will help you understand that you have to chase after other things in life and everything will come while you're after your goals! Give it a try...
Click to expand...

i like this post :up: :up:
 
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