How do you handle this?

oboman

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I'm going through a divorce. The problem is we have one year old baby together. My wife has been making all the rule while the divorce has not been finalized. First, she only lets me see the baby only at her parents' place. I went along. I used to see my baby 2 to 3 times per week at her parents place. Then, she said I can only see my baby on Sunday, every Sunday. Then, this time, she said I can see my baby two times a month- 3rd and 4th Sunday. Now, I told my lawyer to help make me see the baby more. The lawyer hasn't done so.

Tomorrow, Sunday, I'm suppose to see my baby, as I used to. Then, a few hours ago, Saturday night, she text and say she's taking care of baby 1st and 2nd Sunday, meaning I'm not allowed to see the baby.

It seems as if she's trying to make baby see me less and less.

How should I handle this?

Anyone has gone this experience? I need your help.

Thanks anyone.
 

window

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You need to get advice from a family court lawyer...you should be able to get this service for free. Use the internet and source advice from people in similar situations. I'm not sure about this but be careful as the divorce will have conditions about custody of the children etc etc
 

dark god

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Unfornately there isnt much u can do untill u get to the court house. Why hasnt ur lawyer done anything yet?
 

oboman

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thanks guys. she kicks me out of her house. I don't want to get into physical fight for the baby. This would be cruel and unhumanely. The sake of the baby is the most important.

I'm working with my lawyer right now. Thanks for the tips.
 

Warrior74

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Lawyer, lawyer, lawyer!

The game is rigged. You have a hell of a fight on your hands and the deck is stacked against you. Get your lawyer on his fricking job.
 

mrRuckus

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Espi said:
Respectfully--get used to it. Even if you can afford legal counsel, the laws of the land favor women...you have absolutely no recourse in this situation.

Sorry to be so blunt...but you have to face facts.

Or break laws for the good of your child.
 

In$tinct

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Danger said:
Wait, were you living in HER house? Or is it both of yours?

Stop giving her all of the high ground. You are by default making her the custodial parent!
Best post in the thread.


I am a father with Full-Custody of my 2 sons. They are 2 and 4 years old, and I was awarded custody, they couldn’t chose.

How did I accomplish this, by doing exactly what you are allowing your wife to get away with. She is beating you to every punch my friend.


This she isn’t allowing me to keep them as often will be
"He seemed to lose interest in his child and stopped coming to see him/her as often".

Without a court order, no one besides your wife can keep the child away from you. If you can actually provide a quality life for your child. It is time for a Recon mission and snatch up your child the first chance you have. That is why you are only "allowed" to see them at her parents. She knows this! And I did the same exact thing to my ex. The best part was that her and my parents don’t get along, so she went 8 weeks without visiting her sons. The Judge about **** himself when he heard.

As far as the house is concerned, unless there is a restraining or court order saying it is either hers, or you are not allowed within so many feet. Go over there when she is at work or whatever; kick in the door if you cannot get in. Change the locks, and get a restraining order against her because of abuse. It is legal, google this if you don’t believe it. Possession is 9/10 of the law, and that goes for custody as well.

Just for some bonus points with the Judge.

-Sign up for some counseling sessions so whenever witch tries bringing up anything in court. Cussing, Smoking, Drinking... Whatever... The session is private, so whatever she brings up. You just reply "Yes your honor, I had a problem with ##$^@#@, but I recognized it and have been meeting with Dr so and so to get past it.

-Sign up for stupid single parenting, cooking classes... whatever just for more fluff.

It will be ok, but you have to take control!
 

ATX1001

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There's some great advice in this thread already.

I was in the exact same situation 8 months ago. My ex wife restricted my time with my daughter, down to 4hrs per week. My problem is that although I want to see my daughter "a lot", I don't want full custody.

So what I did was continue to make requests (written, ie. sms or email) to see my daughter all the time (when I was free) and kept getting turned down. I kept a diary of all the times I asked and she said no. When we got to court, I brought it all up in my affidavit and put a proposed schedule together for the court. She wanted to drop my time to 3.5hrs per week, I wanted to increase it to 12hrs (8 on sat, 4 on sun) and the judge sided with me.

My daughter is only 2, so no overnights yet but my lawyer says I'll get that next time we go to court in 6 weeks. I also had an assessment done with a child psychologist and I'll get the results soon as she tried every trick in the book - saying I was a bad parent, that I couldn't provide a balanced diet, etc.

Note that this method is not cheap. I'm already 20 grand in the hole and am probably only halfway. The only satisfaction I've got from it is that I know she's spent more and she's now run out of money..

If you do it early enough, you can get away with the "possession is 9/10th's", but I left it too late.. plus as I said above I didn't want full custody as I have to work full time. I'm going for around 40%, which I'll eventually get when she's a little older (so my lawyer says..)

btw, after a few months everything settles down and she realises that she can get free childcare at the drop of a hat, you will see your kid a lot more.
 

Nutz

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Danger said:
Wait, were you living in HER house? Or is it both of yours?

Stop giving her all of the high ground. You are by default making her the custodial parent!
They're married so half is his if he's in the US regardless of who's name is on the mortgage or who paid the bills. Marital property is pretty much a 50/50 split. She can fight over the kid, but he can fight over the house. In the end the lawyers are the ones that will win though.

If no judgements have been made and she merely kicked the OP out of the house, then he can just take the kid one night and disappear and file for divorce. Possession is 9/10ths of the law, and that's the way it is with kids too. Just get a solid apartment set up with a regular babysitter. Fight tooth and nail to show you're the stable environment and that's how you go about getting custody. Women have shown us the rules for years now, guys just need to adopt their plays out of their game plan to come out on top. The key is to ensure she doesn't know where the new apartment is at. Even better is if you can get a TRO against the mother. When women fight dirty guys need to respond in kind. Taking the "high road" just means you'll get screwed harder at the end of all this.
 
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