she implies she likes italian guys, should i be threatened?

i had a date with a beautiful girl today, from how she seems she appears to be a good girl. when i met her she wouldn't let me even greet her with a kiss on the cheek, which i thought was weird.

then when i kissed her good night and went in for the kiss on the cheek again she was like 'whoa what are you doing??' i said 'im just kissing u on the cheek good night, i understand it's too early for kissing so i respect what u said' but that may have ruined my date completely cos she thought i was going for it.

anyway, during the date she mentioned her sister married an italian guy and generally women from her country think italian guys are hot, im not italian, should i be threatened by this?

she has a class mate she studies with who appears to be a non-afc good looking italian guy so i do see him as a potential threat. is my mindframe wrong?

i feel that if i get involved with her she may end up cheating on me with this guy if he makes a move..

Yes your mind frame is wrong.

You should be wondering what you did (or didn't do) on that date that made her weird out over a kiss on the cheek.

Dollars to donuts next time you ask her out she flakes away.

Even if mister slick hair is bending her over the library study tables, that should not be in your frame whatsoever. You should be attrating her and exciting her so she doesn't even think about him or any other dude.

scrouds said:

Yes your mind frame is wrong.

You should be wondering what you did (or didn't do) on that date that made her weird out over a kiss on the cheek.

Dollars to donuts next time you ask her out she flakes away.

Even if mister slick hair is bending her over the library study tables, that should not be in your frame whatsoever. You should be attrating her and exciting her so she doesn't even think about him or any other dude.

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i am wondering.. but we did discuss how she said how she doesnt like people she doesn't know touching her or getting too close, like she hates going to clubs cos guys keep grabbing her arm or trying to get in too close. i know people like this who dont like people invading their personal space

the fact she wouldnt let me kiss her on the cheek when we met signifies that my kissing her good night on the cheek is the same behaviour.

she seemed to be excited about me taking her out again this weekend, when i said i'd call her in a couple days to let her know what day we're meeting up, i mentioned i'd keep it a secret what we'd do/go but then realised she wants to know so she can dress accordingly for the occasion so i assume if she doesn't flake she's still interested.

tho she could just be saying this, tho this was literally 5 secs before i attempted to kiss her on the cheek good night.

i see what you're saying about the other guy, but hes her type physically, we're here studying for 6 months, i just dont want to look a fool with her cheating on me with him cos hes her type.

should i completely change this mindset and just worry about why im not creating more interest in her on the date?

i still really dont know what to do on dates talking wise to convey what i want or what im suppose to convey. how do i touch her emotionally so she feels that attraction?

she implies she likes italian guys, should i be threatened?

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Unless you're italian you're safe I think. But watch out, she may jump on you anyway.

More to the point, worry about getting the girl for now. In general, look up "onetis" and "scarsity mentality".

she doesnt like you

I dunno, should you feel threatened because she said she likes Italian guys? No! Why would you feel threatened over this? You're looking too much into what she said.

pete101 said:

i had a date with a beautiful girl today, from how she seems she appears to be a good girl. when i met her she wouldn't let me even greet her with a kiss on the cheek, which i thought was weird.

then when i kissed her good night and went in for the kiss on the cheek again she was like 'whoa what are you doing??' i said 'im just kissing u on the cheek good night, i understand it's too early for kissing so i respect what u said' but that may have ruined my date completely cos she thought i was going for it.

anyway, during the date she mentioned her sister married an italian guy and generally women from her country think italian guys are hot, im not italian, should i be threatened by this?

she has a class mate she studies with who appears to be a non-afc good looking italian guy so i do see him as a potential threat. is my mindframe wrong?

i feel that if i get involved with her she may end up cheating on me with this guy if he makes a move..

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Sounds like she's not really into you. She never really warmed up to you during the date. Did she ask you $hit test questions? Those statements about liking Italian guys was exactly that, a $hit test, and sort of letting you know she's not into you. When a broad likes you, she will not sabotage, at least initially, the possibility of starting a good relationship with a guy.

They all have their "preference", yet most of the time end up with somebody who is at least slightly different. You and I have prefferences. I like girls with double D's. Very often I end up with girls who have much smaller breasts, because they are attractive. She was throwing the Italian comment/excuse to test you and communicate she wasn't into you. No biggie. Just learn to recognize it next time it comes up, and you'll know how to handle it.

pete101 said:

i had a date with a beautiful girl today, from how she seems she appears to be a good girl. when i met her she wouldn't let me even greet her with a kiss on the cheek, which i thought was weird.

then when i kissed her good night and went in for the kiss on the cheek again she was like 'whoa what are you doing??' i said 'im just kissing u on the cheek good night, i understand it's too early for kissing so i respect what u said' but that may have ruined my date completely cos she thought i was going for it.

anyway, during the date she mentioned her sister married an italian guy and generally women from her country think italian guys are hot, im not italian, should i be threatened by this?

she has a class mate she studies with who appears to be a non-afc good looking italian guy so i do see him as a potential threat. is my mindframe wrong?

i feel that if i get involved with her she may end up cheating on me with this guy if he makes a move..

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After reading that alone I gotta say you need to read a lot more around here. Of course this next statement from me isn't true but live by it for now, WOMEN ARE DISPOSABLE.

As for the details about her liking for Italians, that's just non-sense. You don't listen to that and definitely don't take it to heart, if you want say something like "And this is entertaining me how?" Bottom line if that statement stuck out to you on your date then it's not a good date.

Pete, I'm going to tear your post apart piece by piece, make comments, and and otherwise give you the dose of tough love you need.

pete101 said:

i am wondering.. but we did discuss how she said how she doesnt like people she doesn't know touching her or getting too close, like she hates going to clubs cos guys keep grabbing her arm or trying to get in too close. i know people like this who dont like people invading their personal space

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She said. She doesn't know. She hates. You got this information how? By listening to what comes out of her pretty little mouth? You are 1000% better off not listening to what chicks say, but observing what they do.

pete101 said:

the fact she wouldnt let me kiss her on the cheek when we met signifies that my kissing her good night on the cheek is the same behaviour.

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It signifies you didn't build enough attraction during the date. Did you actually build anything on the date, or just try and stare down her blouse for a peek at the goods?

pete101 said:

she seemed to be excited about me taking her out again this weekend, when i said i'd call her in a couple days to let her know what day we're meeting up, i mentioned i'd keep it a secret what we'd do/go but then realised she wants to know so she can dress accordingly for the occasion so i assume if she doesn't flake she's still interested.

tho she could just be saying this, tho this was literally 5 secs before i attempted to kiss her on the cheek good night.

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A RED FLAG GETS THROWN TO THE FIELD! DO NOT discuss the next date. Its like you're playing with a toy, nothign real. Oh, I know, the PUA book says create mystery so I won't mention where we're going. Create a little damn mystery by not letting her know if there are future plans.

Not only that, but she's easily working you to pull info out of you. Comes up with a simple excuse.... "Well how would I know how to dress if you don't tell me where?" You're playing by her rules, not yours. If dress is an issue, tell her what to wear.

pete101 said:

i see what you're saying about the other guy, but hes her type physically, we're here studying for 6 months, i just dont want to look a fool with her cheating on me with him cos hes her type.

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What guy? Huh, I can't see another guy. Oh, her a-spicy a-meatball on the side. Cheating? Cheating assumes committment. Have you proposed yet? You barely know her. She owes you no committment. Neither do you.

pete101 said:

should i completely change this mindset and just worry about why im not creating more interest in her on the date?

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As a start. You're either a leader or a follower in this world, and the followers worry about everyone else.

pete101 said:

i still really dont know what to do on dates talking wise to convey what i want or what im suppose to convey. how do i touch her emotionally so she feels that attraction?

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What do i say to touch her? You don't say anything. You want to touch her emotionally, touch her physically. Flirt. Do you flirt? Do you have fun? I know! Tell her you love her and buy her some flowers. How do you attract a girl? By being the kind of man that attracts women.

Gangster Of Love said:

Sounds like she's not really into you. She never really warmed up to you during the date. Did she ask you $hit test questions? Those statements about liking Italian guys was exactly that, a $hit test, and sort of letting you know she's not into you. When a broad likes you, she will not sabotage, at least initially, the possibility of starting a good relationship with a guy.

They all have their "preference", yet most of the time end up with somebody who is at least slightly different. You and I have prefferences. I like girls with double D's. Very often I end up with girls who have much smaller breasts, because they are attractive. She was throwing the Italian comment/excuse to test you and communicate she wasn't into you. No biggie. Just learn to recognize it next time it comes up, and you'll know how to handle it.

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i think i need to clarify, she never actually said she liked italian guys, nor did i ask this.. her family member married an italian guy and she said women from her country generally think italian guys are hot/sexy.

is this implied then? she never actually said what she liked nor did i ask.

thing is literally before the end of the date, i said to her i'll call her in 2 days to let her know what time and when we're meeting but not what we're doing.. then i backtracked and said 'well actually maybe i should let u know cos u need to know how to dress for me that night.' she agreed saying that i have to think like a girl from her country so that info is much needed (i.e. if i took her rockclimbing or somewhere which requires a lot of walking, high heels aren't ideal etc)

but then i went for the kiss good night on the cheek, i already knew she doesnt like people touching her or getting too close too soon but i thought cos we spent 2 hours together a kiss on the cheek goodbye was no deal, she says to me 'what u doing??' i say 'im just kissing on the cheek goodnight, i know its too early to kiss u properly and i respect that'

she waves at me goodbye in a hand gesture (maybe a wave of bye bye you'll never see me naked) but im surprised something as simple as going for a kiss goodnight on her cheek would rattle her and for her not to like me anymore cos i supposedly didnt respect her space. granted i shouldnt hav

Does anyone remember the movie in which Eddie Murphy pretended to Italian? He starred with the dude from 2 and 1/2 man

mindset is wrong, but I gotta say...us Italian guys ARE some sexy mofos.

Pete, what Gangster said was on the money.

This chick had low interest in you from the get go.

As a man you shouldn't accept this kind of behaviour from a girl. If you are going on a date then a kiss should be warranted. A kiss is an indicator that things went well so if your advances are rebuffed by your attempt to kiss then it means the date did not go so well.

I would next this cold fish so she can be fvcked by a guido and be tossed aside after a week.

pete101 said:

anyway, during the date she mentioned her sister married an italian guy and generally women from her country think italian guys are hot, im not italian, should i be threatened by this?

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Should you be threatened by her saying that women from her country think that Italian guys are hot? Well answer me this...

Where were the two of you at when she said this to you? You were ON A DATE,right?

This is where I disagree with some of the other posters. I don't think she had low interest from the beginning.

This girl did her hair,her make-up,wore perfume,probably went through 2 or 3 different outfits before deciding on one to wear,didn't flake,and she did ALL THIS for you,a guy who's NOT ITALIAN.

And not only that,but SHE KNEW you weren't italian when she accepted the date with you.


That doesn't sound like low interest to me.



Seems to me like it was somewhere during the date that her interest took a nosedive.



It's already been said before a thousand times..."Go by what a woman does,not by what she says". Well,what did she do here? She intentionally,ON PURPOSE,went out on a date with a guy WHO'S NOT what she said women from her country are attracted to.


So no,you shouldn't feel threatened by her implying she likes italian guys. I mean for pete's sake,(lol,"pete's" sake),she was ON A DATE WITH YOU when she said that.



If she had told you that during the approach,then yeah,I could understand what you're saying,but not after she's done said yes to going out with you,gotten herself all prettied up,actually showed up to the date and didn't flake.



To be honest,when it comes to dating,you have other more important things to be concerned with besides your ethnicity.



Like Scrouds said,you need to work on your frame. Your frame is caused by your beliefs,and your belief,by your thoughts. You obviuosly have some skills,I mean you got her to go out with you...EVEN THOUGH she claims she only likes italian guys.


So you did something right.


Whatever that "something" was you did,THAT'S WHAT YOU NEED TO FOCUS ON IMPROVING...not worrying about whether some chick only dates italians or not.

You're worrying too much about the Italian guy she hasn't yet fooled around with or even met. You have other things to get neurotic over.

Like why are you even giving any thought to a girl that's obviously not attracted to you? If she was, you'd know it by now.

Cheers!

DJDamage said:

Pete, what Gangster said was on the money.

This chick had low interest in you from the get go.

As a man you shouldn't accept this kind of behaviour from a girl. If you are going on a date then a kiss should be warranted. A kiss is an indicator that things went well so if your advances are rebuffed by your attempt to kiss then it means the date did not go so well.

I would next this cold fish so she can be fvcked by a guido and be tossed aside after a week.

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this is what is so confusing for me.. im pretty sure she had high interest in me from the get go.. she constantly kino'd me when we first met and gave me her phone number.. i never felt such high interest before unless it was feigned.

her admission that women from her country think italian guys were hot was on the basis of me discussing the topic as she mentioned her family member married an italian guy.

she never actually told me specifically or impllied that she did (although she probably does) but was speaking for the general female population of her country, bear in mind she never would have said this had i not asked her about how her family member ended up marrying an italian guy as in how did they meet cos they live so far away. does that make things a little clearer?

she didnt actually say this to spite me or disrespect me, i asked her about it in an indirect way so she complied with an answer. it's not as if she just suddenly came out and said 'oh by the way women from my country generally think italian guys are hot.'

i agree with everything you say but it really confuses me cos i could have sworn she has interest or had some interest, she doesnt like to be touched, i know this even though i should judge from how she behaves not what she says, but the fact she wouldnt even let me kiss her on the cheek when i greeted her at the beginning of the date suggests to me shes not the touchy feely type until she knows someone better?

or should i assume she saw me and changed her mind cos she doesnt feel comfortable around me even on initial meeting?

The fact that you're worrying in the first place is enough to scream "I'M NOT ALPHA! I'M AN AFC! I LOST MY BALLS AND CAN'T FIND THEM!"

You are not the leader. Not good. You are a follower, as evidenced by you worrying about the competition. Not good. Insecurity has shown on your character. Not good.

It sounds like she was FORCED to date you. The fact she wouldn't let you kiss her on the cheek (WTF?) was one sign that she's just not that into you.

Then she brings up Italian guys (sexy as hell BTW, no homo), that could be a sh*t test but you are at a disadvantage. She wanted to let you know that at that time that she just wasn't that into you. She could dump you in a New York second, and the fact that you showed no mystery didn't help.

You need to spin more plates. You now know what to do for the next time this happens to you. And don't go around this same girl while driving an Italian car i.e. Maserati/ Lamborghini.

Case closed.