why am i a bad person?

Today i lost two friends. Both of them were girls, but i wasn't trying to game either of them. I was just friends. This one girl had a crush on one of my friends to the point of obsession, and my bud didn't like her, so i finally told her, "(Friend) doesn't like you at all. It isn't because he doesn't want a boyfriend. It's because you annoy him. He doesn't even like you a little." Apparently i made her cry.

This next girl is a person i was better friends with. She's a really cool person, and I like her alot, although not in a sexual way. Anyways, we both knew a mutual person. This kid who she is friends with is a kid my church helped out during christmas. This kid's family was homeless, and everyone at my church other than me ostracized him. I was really nice to him, and I gave him my cell phone number and everything. I thought that we were at least aquaintances.

This past week, the girl finds out that i knew her friend. Her friend doesn't talk to me at all everytime i try to message him on facebook just to see how he's doing, and the girl tells me it's because, "He doesn't like me because i remind him of a bad time in his life." This really bothered me. Why wouldn't he like me? I was really kind to him, and i actually treated him like a person while my church friends treated him like dirt, and so me and the girl get into it about this, and she calls me insensitive because i don't even try to relate what he's gone through. So i tell her "i hate her because she reminds me of a bad time in my life." and she goes on to call me an *******, and to never talk to her again.

Why do i take things too far? That girl actually told me to be more like my best friend because he's a better person than me. I'm better than my friend at a lot of things though. He's even told me he's jealous that I'm so smart, and that he wishes he was as smart as me, and he's done morally wrong things too like smoking weed and drinking; while i've never even considered it. Why is he a better person than me? Why am I a bad person. Why do i toy with people's emotions just because i can? I really want to become a better person. I"m sick of losing friends because of the way I am. I'm really actually feeling the full effect right now. I always morally justified my wrongdoings to myself and i got over it, but this time it's different.

I also realized today that even though my friends are better people than me, i'll be a more successful person than them. My friends might not even get into college, while I'll get to go almost anywhere. I'm smarter than almost everyone i know, and I'm also a worse person.

Are bad people really the most successful? Because, i'd rather be a good person than a successful bad person.

Well, I've had friend who think that just because they are doing something nice for you. Gives them the power to try to manipulate you and be inconsiderate. From what u wrote you remind me of those kinds of friends and I don't like that about them. Also you did nothing wrong in telling that girl how ur guy friend felt about her. Maybe ur delivery was harsh. Sometimes it's not what u say but how u say it.Some ppl feel being frank means to be rude and inconsiderate and people like that piss me off. Well, you've lost some friends. Contact them and find out what makes u such a bad person and reflect on it. Maybe it doesn't all have something to do with u. I on the other hand have found that lots of people want to be my friend and a lot of times I don't even like things about these people or share common interests. Yet I wonder why they want to be friends with me.

"Why do i take things too far?"

You are probably bored with life and push buttons to see people's reactions which even though momentarily filling you with tasty excitement and drama ultimately end up not completely satisfying you and then before you know it you are bored again.

It could be that, it could be your simply an assh0le, it could be you have no empathy, tact or common sense. There are so many possibilities from once again the first one I mentioned ie the jaded at life option or perhaps you are an asperger's sufferer or a sociopathic personality.

"Why do i take things too far? That girl actually told me to be more like my best friend because he's a better person than me. I'm better than my friend at a lot of things though. He's even told me he's jealous that I'm so smart, and that he wishes he was as smart as me, and he's done morally wrong things too like smoking weed and drinking; while i've never even considered it. Why is he a better person than me?"

Its not that he's a better person than you its that the girl is judging him likely from a lack of information to be more quality a human being than he actually is.
Basically she's ignorant of the totality of his being but has picked and choosed what she knows of him and likes best and has hastily judged him to be a prize.
Not that I find smoking weed or drinking to be morally wrong but a lot of retarded religious people and others find these things to be. The only way I could agree with society on the moral wrongness of either drug is if a person tries to drive or operate heavy machinery while under the influence of either drug.

"Why am I a bad person. Why do i toy with people's emotions just because i can? I really want to become a better person. I"m sick of losing friends because of the way I am. I'm really actually feeling the full effect right now. I always morally justified my wrongdoings to myself and i got over it, but this time it's different.

I also realized today that even though my friends are better people than me, i'll be a more successful person than them. My friends might not even get into college, while I'll get to go almost anywhere. I'm smarter than almost everyone i know, and I'm also a worse person.

Are bad people really the most successful? Because, i'd rather be a good person than a successful bad person."

Depends on how you define success. The psychopathic white collar criminals ie the snakes in suits usually end up in prison of some sort even if it is a veritable country club of a prison. They may see having remained out of prison for so long as a success or having accomplished certain things on the job as a success even if it hurt millions of people. It all depends on what your personal goal is and what kind of success it is that you are trying to attain.

KontrollerX, I think you're right. I do these things because I'm bored sometimes, and do things to trigger excitement, but it still doesn't excuse how wrong it is. I have a habit of doing this, and I need to learn how to control myself.
I don't really care about smoking or drinking either, but my friend and I are both under age so it is wrong.
I define success in terms of power. That's really all i want in life, but the people who want it are the people that don't deserve it.

Look, if you are really so smart as you say then read back what you have written in your first post!

Jokerlsk said:

This kid's family was homeless, and everyone at my church other than me ostracized him.

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I don´t know what kind of religion do you follow, but I´m pretty sure you are surrounded - forgive me for my words but that´s my opinion - by bigot idiots. If I were you I wouldn´t give a single fvck about the opinion of "the people at your church". Bad things, bad persons... you are not a bad person, but you are fvckin´ brainwashed man!

Alcohol and smoking are not bad, only unhealthy.

Dude. you are not a bad person

you're actions could be seen as harsh, but really who cares

you shouldn't care so much about what others think of you. who cares if that boy doesn't like you. if he wants to be like that then let him

if you cared as much as you say you did, you wouldn't make it mandatory that he like you because you were kind to him

he is not right. he seems alittle trouble. the best thing to do would be to let him settle watever is troubling him and her and offer you support if needed

I think your female friend there overreacted a little. but like Kontroller said, she was merely putting that guy up on a pedestal. he is not a better person than you. you guys should not be judging each others worth anyway. is that what friends do?

A lesson in life i have learned is to try to end disagreements, not push them farther and farther, because then it becomes worse than it ever needed to be. and you can break relationships fast doing that

stop trying to hurt and aim to resolve. you could be bored. but i think you aim to try and hurt the other person more than they have hurt you or annoyed you. try to stop doing that man

as for your first friend. you had no right to tell her unless she asked you. If she wanted to know she would've asked. that was an ******* thing to do

but doing things does not make you a bad person. you are good, you just need to believe that you are and stop letting your friends dictate your character

Raikojo, that first girl asked for my friends number, and i told her no, and she still wouldn't leave me alone, so i pretty much told her what was up.

Your friends are immature idiots. Drop them and make more productive use of your time.

Why let such insignificant people dictate your emotions and your life? I only care about what my family thinks of me, and that's about it. If my friends bad mouth me or throw a tantrum with me, I have no problems dropping them until they crawl back and earn my respect back day by day.

Jokerlsk said:

I also realized today that even though my friends are better people than me, i'll be a more successful person than them. My friends might not even get into college, while I'll get to go almost anywhere. I'm smarter than almost everyone i know, and I'm also a worse person.

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Read this part carefully. Even when you're confessing sins you have to be righteous. You think you're smarter than everybody else and you like to let them know about it. The key part to having successful relationships is to be a social giver, not a social taker.

I think you are TAKING your friends' failures and flaws and throwing them in their faces. Because you are bored, insecure, just an a-hole, etc. If you figure out your motivation you'll be able to change.

Jokerlsk said:

I don't really care about smoking or drinking either, but my friend and I are both under age so it is wrong.

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The problem here is that you think it's wrong because other people said so. If YOU have no problem with it, or couldn't care otherwise, is it really all that wrong?

Jokerlsk said:

I define success in terms of power. That's really all i want in life, but the people who want it are the people that don't deserve it.

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Interesting, and I agree. Yet I only find it interesting because YOU desire power, yet lack the ability to think for yourself (based on the previous quote), which clearly demonstrates that you don't deserve power either...

I think it's wrong because it's against the law. That's not letting other people think for me. I abide to the law.