Posters that give advice but really have no success themselves.

Look, I'm all for helpful posters but let's face it; this site is to get success with women.

What that means is, we have a bucket load of posters dishing out advice which is basically just poorly verbalised theory from people that actually have experience.

If every one is just going to quote existing theory and post advice coming from a place of failing with women themselves, this place is going to turn into a pyramid-scheme where by the posters that actually need help get 'taught' from a poster that could use a hand himself.

The blind leading the blinder.

I was just wondering who does this?
Name and shame.

I'm sure there's virgins here replying to threads created by virgins trying to get laid.
Me, I never cold approach; every thing else, top-gun.
Therefore you won't find me telling someone how to get over AA.

I agree with you. It's human nature though. People will generally give advice about stuff they don't know much about in all areas of life.

As a support community, its nice to have people chiming in from all stages of development.

If you're receiving advice, best read with a grain of salt.

There is strength in numbers, even if they aren't strong voices. I've had my friend give me amazing advice on a situation, then told me he was just spitting out word for word what i told him a year ago.

That's like saying unless someone is a succesful football athlete, they can't give you any advice on your game. Not true. It's possible to technically know the game of football pretty well, enough to give someone else some advice, but not be much of a football player yourself. I watch MMA and see mistakes guys make mistakes all the time when viewed from an outside perspective, yet I am not a successful MMA fighter and would probably get my butt kicked in the ring. Same thing to me.

speakeasy said:

That's like saying unless someone is a succesful football athlete, they can't give you any advice on your game. Not true. It's possible to technically know the game of football pretty well, enough to give someone else some advice, but not be much of a football player yourself. I watch MMA and see mistakes guys make mistakes all the time when viewed from an outside perspective, yet I am not a successful MMA fighter and would probably get my butt kicked in the ring. Same thing to me.

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Cosign
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and like the thread in my sig, there's a dude there giving me advice who ends up making a thread about his situation which is a little like mine.

Your point is well taken. But there are some guys getting girls that might not always give the best advice either. Maybe the guy uses a style of game that wouldn't work for the person needing advice because they aren't congruent with it or experienced enough to pull it off. Maybe the guy giving advice is good looking and thinks his game is better than it actually is and his advice wouldn't work for a less attractive dude. Or maybe he is more of a natural that isn't consciously aware of all of his tactics to get girls.

You could also have a guy not getting girls who understands the fundamentals. Or maybe he had the experience of many failures and wants to warn others about certain mistakes.

Anyway I appreciate and listen to all advice on here experienced or not and see if it makes sense to me. If someone prefers to only listen to the more experienced guys that's fine too.

I only listen to a few posters on here anyhow

it's called keyboard jockeying... when you have guys who know all the stuff but have never put it to use... or giving advice they don't/can't follow themselves...

or a guy who last week was asking for advice in his AFC situation and this week turns around and starts giving others advice...

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As far as the sports analogy - i can't imagine a serious MMA competetitor taking advice from someone who's never done a contact sport (aka: a fan) seriously... no matter how good the advice was... you'd get laughed at... doing and watching are two different things...

same with football... listen to sports talk sometime... all these armchair quarterbacks who think they know better than the coach calling up and saying "we need to run the ball more" blah blah...

yes, you can have an opinon... but imagine a professional taking advice from a fan... in any sport.... it's just stupid to even consider...
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I personally barely pickup anymore, and more or less am into relationship stuff...
So i try to stay out of pickup threads and post only in relationships/sex threads... which are things i practice regularly =)

or a guy who last week was asking for advice in his AFC situation and this week turns around and starts giving others advice...

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:crackup:

we might as while close the forum.
just because you have experience with one situation does'nt mean you'll have experience in another.

hell, i still don't believe woman sh!t test.

LOL so true. Went out with a few guys from this site a few years ago to sarge. Jeez, I thought my game was lacking. These guys were terrified to even look at other girls. Fast forward to a few days later, I see some of the same scared guys I hung out with giving advice as if they were David D'Angelo or something. That's when I learned most of the stuff on these forums is just rehashed advice learned from a bunch of reading.

Phenomenal One said:

just because you have experience with one situation does'nt mean you'll have experience in another.

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What does that have to do with the what i was talking about? I'm taking about a guy who comes onto this board for help (normally within his relationship or with a girl who he likes a lot but seems to be failing with) he makes his post (obviously not knowing a thing about male-female dynamics) and he gets some good advice from "seasoned" people who have been doing this stuff for a long time.... His thread fades away, he may or may not have been able to fix his situation... Maybe during this time he reads some threads, maybe a book or two, listens to some podcast... Then a week later is on here suddenly giving other guys advice...

YES i do find that outlandish!

another issue: Part of the reason so many guys get confused when they have real issues... I often notice a guy will make a thread and be getting some real good advice, but it'll be hard advice to take (leave the woman, ignore her, punish her, don't be needy, etc) And he'll be making a lot of "but" type post, just looking for some way to not do what we're telling him to do. Then suddenly somebody pops into the thread who has 2 post and joined last week and he'll be like "just talk to the girl about it, that always solves my problems"... and BAM! that guy responds back "you know what? you're right... I'm going to talk to her. You're the man!"....

hell, i still don't believe woman sh!t test.

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Even if you can't comprehend that it's done a lot on a subconsicous level, and you don't want to believe that... YOU REALLY DON'T BELIEVE THAT THEY ALSO DO IT ON A CONSCIOUS LEVEL? pick up a cosmo or some woman magazine sometime and look for articles that read something like this "Is your boyfriend psycho? 5 Test to figure out if he is or not" And trust me - women try these out and pass them on to their friends.

LOL so true. Went out with a few guys from this site a few years ago to sarge. Jeez, I thought my game was lacking. These guys were terrified to even look at other girls. Fast forward to a few days later, I see some of the same scared guys I hung out with giving advice as if they were David D'Angelo or something. That's when I learned most of the stuff on these forums is just rehashed advice learned from a bunch of reading.

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as good as sum of these guys advice is, i'd never go sarging with em.

What does that have to do with the what i was talking about? I'm taking about a guy who comes onto this board for help (normally within his relationship or with a girl who he likes a lot but seems to be failing with) he makes his post (obviously not knowing a thing about male-female dynamics) and he gets some good advice from "seasoned" people who have been doing this stuff for a long time.... His thread fades away, he may or may not have been able to fix his situation... Maybe during this time he reads some threads, maybe a book or two, listens to some podcast... Then a week later is on here suddenly giving other guys advice...

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ohh i understand, yeah that is pretty messed up.
if a guys post sounds to good to be true, i check his past post.

another issue: Part of the reason so many guys get confused when they have real issues... I often notice a guy will make a thread and be getting some real good advice, but it'll be hard advice to take (leave the woman, ignore her, punish her, don't be needy, etc) And he'll be making a lot of "but" type post, just looking for some way to not do what we're telling him to do. Then suddenly somebody pops into the thread who has 2 post and joined last week and he'll be like "just talk to the girl about it, that always solves my problems"... and BAM! that guy responds back "you know what? you're right... I'm going to talk to her. You're the man!"....

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guys that come here seeking advice want someone to tell them what they wanna hear. they don't wanna take advice that they're to scared too follow.

Even if you can't comprehend that it's done a lot on a subconsicous level, and you don't want to believe that... YOU REALLY DON'T BELIEVE THAT THEY ALSO DO IT ON A CONSCIOUS LEVEL? pick up a cosmo or some woman magazine sometime and look for articles that read something like this "Is your boyfriend psycho? 5 Test to figure out if he is or not" And trust me - women try these out and pass them on to their friends.

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i understand woman test guys, but guys here talk about how a guy entire interaction with woman is a sh!t test. how everything a guy does is put under a microscope.

Great post OP. As for me, I never give advice unless I've tried and tested it myself. I would feel like too much of a pathetic hypocrite if I started, say, giving advice on how to get over oneitus if I was paralysed by it myself.

bukowski_merit said:

What does that have to do with the what i was talking about? I'm taking about a guy who comes onto this board for help (normally within his relationship or with a girl who he likes a lot but seems to be failing with) he makes his post (obviously not knowing a thing about male-female dynamics) and he gets some good advice from "seasoned" people who have been doing this stuff for a long time.... His thread fades away, he may or may not have been able to fix his situation... Maybe during this time he reads some threads, maybe a book or two, listens to some podcast... Then a week later is on here suddenly giving other guys advice...

YES i do find that outlandish!

another issue: Part of the reason so many guys get confused when they have real issues... I often notice a guy will make a thread and be getting some real good advice, but it'll be hard advice to take (leave the woman, ignore her, punish her, don't be needy, etc) And he'll be making a lot of "but" type post, just looking for some way to not do what we're telling him to do. Then suddenly somebody pops into the thread who has 2 post and joined last week and he'll be like "just talk to the girl about it, that always solves my problems"... and BAM! that guy responds back "you know what? you're right... I'm going to talk to her. You're the man!"....

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eh i see where you're coming from but some people just want to hear the advice that sounds good to them whether it be from an "AFC" or from a "DJ"

Phenomenal One said:

ohh i understand, yeah that is pretty messed up.
if a guys post sounds to good to be true, i check his past post.



guys that come here seeking advice want someone to tell them what they wanna hear. they don't wanna take advice that they're to scared too follow.

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Pretty much... seems we agree so i guess there was some confusion as to what i was saying in my first post... Good that it's cleared up =)

i understand woman test guys, but guys here talk about how a guy entire interaction with woman is a sh!t test. how everything a guy does is put under a microscope.

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It really depends on how big the test is on how serious it should be taken... Sometimes that "test" should be taken with extreme seriousness if the guy cares about the relationship... For example: A girl saying "i need space" should NOT be meant with words of extreme neediness from the man. Yet, that is what most guys do when women utter those words. ("But i don't understand! We were so good. Don't you need me?")

But yeah, women don't actively analyze how you're treating them (put everything under a microscore)... They just feel the overall vibe of it... By calling it a "Test" men have actually rationalized something that's almost entirely done on emotions....

I like all types of advice because it gets you different viewpoints on everything. Depending on your beliefs you'll take the advice that matches those beliefs best.


I also don't see a problem with the advise in general. If somebody giving bad advise then that can be debated by the posters who know better. So in that sense everybody learns why the advise is bad.


Its up to each individual to learn from their mistakes so the individual will eventually know himself what the best advice is.


There are some posters who do know what they're talking about but struggle to get women. They consciously know but their old sunconscious limiting beliefs stop them from succeeding.


So all in all I don't see a problem.

You are not here on sosuave to help anyone but yourself. And so am I.

When i do post, I basically talk to myself. The post is something that helps me. I read the post and if I relate or did relate to it, I post the solution which i think will help me, or did help me.

Guys who become 'experts' and preach what they practice don't stick around; they move on to something else they are lacking in, or make money out of their knowledge.

The only person that can really help the poster is the poster himself. No 'expert' is going to hang around here and hold their hand without a fee- or stick around to carry others unless there is something in it for them.

All the 'great' posters (guys who became experts) here have moved on. And one day so will I. And hopefully you too.

V

I see some dudes giving out "advice" and "lines" that sound like (and definitely are) they're STRAIGHT OUT OF the Mystery Method book.

You can just smell that the guy has never really tried this out himself and the line or advice is very fvcking cheesy. It's textbook "game" rehashed straight out of a book and you'd get laughed out of the bar for saying it (despite whether it works for Mystery or whoever).

Guys, in my opinion, shouldn't really be giving advice on picking up girls unless they've fvcked a fair few themselves -- and that's just common sense. Would you want someone totally unqualified teaching people medicine, engineering or astrophysics?

And if you do get advice from a keyboard jockey...a handful of salt would compliment it well.

Maybe we can get a rep system going on where only the experienced get reps and based on them people can easily figure out who to listen to...and the rep system isn't based on how many girls you slept with or w/e but how the top DJs on this site perceive you based on your past posts.

oh wait...there is already a rep system..didn't see them greens before lol.

Myself, I used to post here over 6 years ago and then moved on. SInce then I've come back in an entirely differently life situation (married) to give advice when it's something I can relate on and give advice to where I know because I've had experience.

I notice some guys here who have been on here 2 or 3 years and have thousands of posts. I've been registered over 7 years now and only recently hit 200 posts.