Am I in Friendzone?

I met this girl online, got her number and set up a first date to meet for a drink. We met at a bar. The conversation went well. After about two hours, I ended the date before she did.

We walked out to the parking lot and she told me "it was nice meeting you. If you want to hang out again, call me." But she stood far away so kissing her was not an option.

We texted a few times and she asked if I wanted to hang out Saturday night. I said yes and we met for dinner. Again the conversation was ok, but more low key. At the end of the date, we again walked out to the parking lot and she kind of hurried to her car and rattled off "enjoy your Sunday. Bye.". or something to that effect.

Is it worth trying to set up date three or write this off as a loss?

I'm going to have to say no.

I see absolutely no sign of friendzone in the situation as you describe here.

All I see is a few signs of disinterest.


I can see why you'd be confused,though. On the one hand,she (according to her bodylanguage) seemed disinterested not only to not give you a kiss at the end of the date,but standing far away from you as well.

Then the "enjoy your Sunday" comment after the secoond date. That's basically the same as "Have a nice day",which is just politeness,not attraction/interest.

Then on the other hand,she tells you to call her if you were interested in hanging out again,plus her asking you out.


I guess you can go out on date number 3 if you want to,although I don't see what the point would be. You'll be the same person you were on the first two dates,and so will she.

Unless something changes,you'll just get another "polite" comment and be out of more money at the end of the date.


But to answer your question,no,you're not in the friendzone with her.

She just doesn't seem interested.

You didn't escalate the initial spark...which has caused this situation to be....well boring.

You need to establish your interest and lead the interaction. If it felt like you were hanging out with a friend....its because you didn't establish the frame.



PIMP

I agree, you probably aren't asking the right questions or making her feel the right vibe dude.. What are you guys talking about? Do you even know what she is looking for relationship wise?

SleepyRangerMedic82D said:

I agree, you probably aren't asking the right questions or making her feel the right vibe dude.. What are you guys talking about? Do you even know what she is looking for relationship wise?

Click to expand...

We were fluff talking about work, family, vacation, etc. Her ad said she was looking for someone to have fun with.

ask her if she consider sex fun.

Mike32ct said:

We were fluff talking about work, family, vacation, etc. Her ad said she was looking for someone to have fun with.

Click to expand...

She can talk about that with anyone... sure you gotta fluff a bit in the beginning, but you never took control of the interaction and lead her to think of you as a potential anything (fuvk buddy, relationship, one night stand), that's why your stuck in neutral.




PIMP

Mike32ct said:

We were fluff talking about work, family, vacation, etc. Her ad said she was looking for someone to have fun with.

Click to expand...

So the date was full of "fluff talk".

And there's your problem right there.

Like Pimp-sicle said,she was BORED.

A little fluff may be ok at the beginning,and it's good to use between emotional highs,but too much of it will cause the interaction to become a snoozefest.

She was probably bored on the first date,but decided to go out with you again in hopes that the boredom she intially felt was just first date jitters.
So she went out on the second one hoping things would be better...which they weren't,hence the hurrying out to her car and "enjoy your Sunday" remark.

I like what Pimp-sicle said about you being in "neutral",but you WON'T stay there. The INSTANT you talk with her again,you'll AUTOMATICALLY gravite to one side or the other...friendzone or romantic interest.

You started off in the right direction. Because if you didn't,she wouldn't have bother even going on 2 dates with you. Seems to me that she "likes" you.
You're probably a good,decent person. Have a cool personality and good looks. Since you have all of that,she was searching for the fire,the passion/excitement that turns women on.

You're basically like a Christmas tree. Tall,has a star on the top,is decorated with candy canes,glitter,silver and gold,a wreath,and different color lights wrapped around it.

It's ALL decorated,everyone is hyped up with anticipation and excitement waiting to see how it'll look when the lights are on,then when you plug it into the outlet....NOTHING HAPPENS.


That's what happened with her. She repeatedly went out with you hoping for that "spark",that "electricity" to show up...and it didn't.

I'd be surprised if you were even able to get another date with her,but if you do,you need to do SOMETHING different.

Or you will be in the friendzone.

She this she that... it's not all about her, fellas!

Forget about the Friend Zone for a sec.

Mike, did you enjoy dating this chick? Did the things she say or do (little things like body language) turn you on? Your posts are telling me it's a NO to both.

Change your mentality around, mate. Instead of wondering "does she like me? Am I in the Friend Zone?", think "do I like spending my valuable time with this chick? Is she worthy of my company?" Let women do that likes-me-likes-me-not BS.

Last but not least, sometimes you just don't click with a chick, regardless of how good you are with The Game.