Masked_angel
Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 13, 2009
- Messages
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Hello fellow comrades,
I’ve been spending a lot of time thinking about rejection and how people handle it and I would like to share those thoughts. First some general stuff about how people react to rejection.
The nice guy
We all know the typical nice guy or what some people call AFC. He would probably thanks to his insecurities put all his happiness, pride, his world on some random girl that is soo special. And when the rejection comes, what happens? His world collapses and the part of himself that should be filled up with happiness and pride instead fills up with, sadness, more insecurities and defeatism. He would probably continue on his life with addiction to porn or find a new random girl and continue in his tortuous cycle that only gives him false hope so that he could again put his happiness and pride on a woman.
General tips
If you are in a recovery mode from perhaps the nice guy scenario and is trapped in a tortuous cycle and fills up your emptiness with a new girl. Try instead find something else that occupies your mind, that can fill up the part of you that is empty. Alas, when I was filled up with depression, sadness, insecurities I did affirmations, kaizen and it made me a lot happier.
The more happy you are -> the more attractive you are
Recommendation
I recommend the book 100 simple secrets of happy people David Niven, PH.D. if you have a hard time finding happiness in your life other than women. And articles like "kill that desperation", "be a man"
The Jerk
In another scenario, we have the typical jerk-playerish guy. He doesn’t but his happiness and pride on a woman. Alas he puts his value on a woman and this comes also from insecurities for what happens when he gets rejected? He feels that he lose value. Either he wants to get his “value” back by putting the girl down. Example of this would be by spreading false reputation about the girl, calling her a hore? Becoming violent? Hitting her?
In his mind he screams, “I’m the f**king king, that h*e is nothing f*ck that, im gonna motha-f**k”
Controlled by his testosterone.. and ego. That’s not good at all. But still, his happiness and pride doesn’t come from the girl. But his value, that makes him gangster in front of his friends comes from the girl. You would usually define the jerk by the girl he is with. Becuase he has nothing else going in his life.
General Tips
Solution to this is probably is self-knowing, know who you are and don’t let someone else have control or put a value on you and kill that ego. This has been also discussed in this site, as the article “Let's talk about EGO”, “Stop being so sensitive guys”.
Recommendation:
I recommend the book No more mr nice guy, cause it deals with approval which is kind of close of what a jerk is going through.
“Let's talk about EGO”
“Stop being so sensitive guys”.
Conclusion
So do not put your source of happiness, pride and value from a woman. Easy to say. We can see that some people:
- Try to use the “I’m the prize mentality” but fail because they still let a girl affects their value (ego).
- Some people try to see it as a feed back and still get hurt, because it still conflicts with their happiness.
So how do we fix this? You can, work with your happiness, pride and value and thereafter rejection will not hurt you as much as you think!!
But how can rejection become a source for happiness?
This first accord by a friend of mine, he asked a girl out, and she said no. He smiled and answered with, “aww, girl, now you have had your chance” and laughed. He went away as a real don juan. He wasn’t bothered by the rejection and still when I meet him when he taks about it we all laugh, because the facial expression of the girl was priceless. She was used to see guys begging and offering stuff. Treating her as a queen. "please, give me a chance?" "let me buy you dinner", "just once come out and get to know me"
Lesson:
When rejection accords, do something memorable. If two girls are playing you and want you to buy them drinks? Give them two glass of water.
Do they say something stupid? Repeat what they said in a funny way or act if you didn’t hear what they said “So was it five or seven I should pick you up”.
The key is to have your source of happiness, pride and value from the inside and thereafter persistent. I love being persistence and playing with girls. Evan if they reject me it’s still on. Example from a girl that I met in school we talked a little and then I found her facebook randomly. Look how i handle the her rejections and "no"s
Me: Hey did the thing I said work?
She: hahaah don’t even remember what you said
Me: What? Don’t worry you are still my favorite girl or top 50
She: yeye masked_angel don’t let us get started, I know I am by the top 5
Me: aww your cute, know you have my permission to be my friend
She: gotto think about that, don’t know if I want to be your friend
Me: You could start with buying me dinner. I have heard it’s a Turkish tradition to buy people dinner.
She: hahaha what do you want, samma or kebab. Its only to ask and I will invite you for wonderful dinner you know.
Me: Let’s go then, we meet one afternoon, and then you’ll buy me dinner. You have my number, give me yours too.
She: Absolute dail the numer 07000000000000084 do you want my home number also. Yea I have your number its long and cute as mine, cya
Okey, so here I am rejected by this hot girl. She doesn't remember what we talked about, doesn't't give out her number. Should I
A) Cry, about it buhu
B) Ignore her
C) Spread rumors about her
D) Just have fun
E) Think for my self, Im I so bad looking?
F) Gangsta m*THa F*ucka
Because im persistence and by feeling very unaffected and not caring about what this leads to, I continued on playing, just for fun. No outcome dependent. I never really thought that the conversation would continue on but here it is.
Me: Awww, you are almost cool.. almost
She: Im over cool and you know it
Me: Not cool enough to buy me dinner, (1 - 0 to masked_angel)
She: Haha it’s the guy that buys dinner to the girl
Me: I’m not a guy, I’m a man. By the way how adventoures are you from 1 to 367996?
She: 367995, and that’s the way it is
Me: Good because I need a bodyguard. So next week Friday wanna go out with me on an adventure?
She: hahhahaha don’t think so
Me: Oh my bad, I’m busy on Friday let’s say Thursday instead
She: haha yeye
So try not to put your source of happiness, pride and value on a woman. Turn every rejection around. Don’t become, sad, hurt or angry. Try not to put the girl down. Be not afraid of approaching. Try not for the best opener or routine. If you want to have some lines ready have comeback lines against rejection.
- I have a boyfriend
Oh, that’s cool a girl like you should get more experience before going with a guy like me OR A girl like you should have 2 guys.
- I don’t want you
Girl you do not want me yet, alas, my time Is expensive. So you had your chance OR Girl you do not want me yet, alas, so let us meet on friday 04.00?
- Lets be friends
I have enough friends, and I don’t need one more. (I said this one, and days after I heard the girl was crying over me saying that she was deeply in love. Remember girls are more afraid of losing something than gaining something better)
- Your ugly
Look at her in a why as if it is the first time you heard it. Then just say, bye you hade your chance.
- Im busy at that day.
Skip your plans, your going to have a lot more fun with me
- I cant that day
When I think about it. Neither can I, lets say ______.
If you use these line, or perhaps you have some better or other thing you do say. I will promise you that you will look back to that moment and not see the rejection. But see the moment you made a comeback and laugh.
Remember rejection can be a source of happiness.
One failure that i always laugh and make me in a good mood is when I was dancing with a girl and she said.
She: I have a boyfriend
Me: So have I
She: What? Are you gay?
hahahha! Failure.
Recommendation
Zan Perrion talks about it I the way of natural. That when he gets rejected he usaually continue on with the girl as if she didn't say anything.
David X talks about it rulez of david x that he would grab the girl and always say the last word.
“Being Persistent vs. Being Pushy”
Guys, this is fun stuff, We should all laugh about it
Memories should be positive and fun. You should all look back at
"Once a girl said this…."
"Once a girl rejected me but I answered with this…"
And laugh.
Best Regards
Masked_angel
I’ve been spending a lot of time thinking about rejection and how people handle it and I would like to share those thoughts. First some general stuff about how people react to rejection.
The nice guy
We all know the typical nice guy or what some people call AFC. He would probably thanks to his insecurities put all his happiness, pride, his world on some random girl that is soo special. And when the rejection comes, what happens? His world collapses and the part of himself that should be filled up with happiness and pride instead fills up with, sadness, more insecurities and defeatism. He would probably continue on his life with addiction to porn or find a new random girl and continue in his tortuous cycle that only gives him false hope so that he could again put his happiness and pride on a woman.
General tips
If you are in a recovery mode from perhaps the nice guy scenario and is trapped in a tortuous cycle and fills up your emptiness with a new girl. Try instead find something else that occupies your mind, that can fill up the part of you that is empty. Alas, when I was filled up with depression, sadness, insecurities I did affirmations, kaizen and it made me a lot happier.
The more happy you are -> the more attractive you are
Recommendation
I recommend the book 100 simple secrets of happy people David Niven, PH.D. if you have a hard time finding happiness in your life other than women. And articles like "kill that desperation", "be a man"
The Jerk
In another scenario, we have the typical jerk-playerish guy. He doesn’t but his happiness and pride on a woman. Alas he puts his value on a woman and this comes also from insecurities for what happens when he gets rejected? He feels that he lose value. Either he wants to get his “value” back by putting the girl down. Example of this would be by spreading false reputation about the girl, calling her a hore? Becoming violent? Hitting her?
In his mind he screams, “I’m the f**king king, that h*e is nothing f*ck that, im gonna motha-f**k”
Controlled by his testosterone.. and ego. That’s not good at all. But still, his happiness and pride doesn’t come from the girl. But his value, that makes him gangster in front of his friends comes from the girl. You would usually define the jerk by the girl he is with. Becuase he has nothing else going in his life.
General Tips
Solution to this is probably is self-knowing, know who you are and don’t let someone else have control or put a value on you and kill that ego. This has been also discussed in this site, as the article “Let's talk about EGO”, “Stop being so sensitive guys”.
Recommendation:
I recommend the book No more mr nice guy, cause it deals with approval which is kind of close of what a jerk is going through.
“Let's talk about EGO”
“Stop being so sensitive guys”.
Conclusion
So do not put your source of happiness, pride and value from a woman. Easy to say. We can see that some people:
- Try to use the “I’m the prize mentality” but fail because they still let a girl affects their value (ego).
- Some people try to see it as a feed back and still get hurt, because it still conflicts with their happiness.
So how do we fix this? You can, work with your happiness, pride and value and thereafter rejection will not hurt you as much as you think!!
But how can rejection become a source for happiness?
This first accord by a friend of mine, he asked a girl out, and she said no. He smiled and answered with, “aww, girl, now you have had your chance
” and laughed. He went away as a real don juan. He wasn’t bothered by the rejection and still when I meet him when he taks about it we all laugh, because the facial expression of the girl was priceless. She was used to see guys begging and offering stuff. Treating her as a queen. "please, give me a chance?" "let me buy you dinner", "just once come out and get to know me"Lesson:
When rejection accords, do something memorable. If two girls are playing you and want you to buy them drinks? Give them two glass of water.
Do they say something stupid? Repeat what they said in a funny way or act if you didn’t hear what they said “So was it five or seven I should pick you up”.
The key is to have your source of happiness, pride and value from the inside and thereafter persistent. I love being persistence and playing with girls. Evan if they reject me it’s still on. Example from a girl that I met in school we talked a little and then I found her facebook randomly. Look how i handle the her rejections and "no"s
Me: Hey did the thing I said work?
She: hahaah don’t even remember what you said
Me: What? Don’t worry you are still my favorite girl or top 50
She: yeye masked_angel don’t let us get started, I know I am by the top 5
Me: aww your cute, know you have my permission to be my friend
She: gotto think about that, don’t know if I want to be your friend
Me: You could start with buying me dinner. I have heard it’s a Turkish tradition to buy people dinner.
She: hahaha what do you want, samma or kebab. Its only to ask and I will invite you for wonderful dinner you know.
Me: Let’s go then, we meet one afternoon, and then you’ll buy me dinner. You have my number, give me yours too.
She: Absolute dail the numer 07000000000000084 do you want my home number also. Yea I have your number its long and cute as mine, cya
Okey, so here I am rejected by this hot girl. She doesn't remember what we talked about, doesn't't give out her number. Should I
A) Cry, about it buhu
B) Ignore her
C) Spread rumors about her
D) Just have fun
E) Think for my self, Im I so bad looking?
F) Gangsta m*THa F*ucka
Because im persistence and by feeling very unaffected and not caring about what this leads to, I continued on playing, just for fun. No outcome dependent. I never really thought that the conversation would continue on but here it is.
Me: Awww, you are almost cool.. almost
She: Im over cool and you know it
Me: Not cool enough to buy me dinner, (1 - 0 to masked_angel)
She: Haha it’s the guy that buys dinner to the girl
Me: I’m not a guy, I’m a man. By the way how adventoures are you from 1 to 367996?
She: 367995, and that’s the way it is
Me: Good because I need a bodyguard. So next week Friday wanna go out with me on an adventure?
She: hahhahaha don’t think so
Me: Oh my bad, I’m busy on Friday let’s say Thursday instead
She: haha yeye
So try not to put your source of happiness, pride and value on a woman. Turn every rejection around. Don’t become, sad, hurt or angry. Try not to put the girl down. Be not afraid of approaching. Try not for the best opener or routine. If you want to have some lines ready have comeback lines against rejection.
- I have a boyfriend
Oh, that’s cool a girl like you should get more experience before going with a guy like me
OR A girl like you should have 2 guys.- I don’t want you
Girl you do not want me yet, alas, my time Is expensive. So you had your chance OR Girl you do not want me yet, alas, so let us meet on friday 04.00?
- Lets be friends
I have enough friends, and I don’t need one more. (I said this one, and days after I heard the girl was crying over me saying that she was deeply in love. Remember girls are more afraid of losing something than gaining something better)
- Your ugly
Look at her in a why as if it is the first time you heard it. Then just say, bye you hade your chance.
- Im busy at that day.
Skip your plans, your going to have a lot more fun with me
- I cant that day
When I think about it. Neither can I, lets say ______.
If you use these line, or perhaps you have some better or other thing you do say. I will promise you that you will look back to that moment and not see the rejection. But see the moment you made a comeback and laugh.
Remember rejection can be a source of happiness.
One failure that i always laugh and make me in a good mood is when I was dancing with a girl and she said.
She: I have a boyfriend
Me: So have I
She: What? Are you gay?
hahahha! Failure.
Recommendation
Zan Perrion talks about it I the way of natural. That when he gets rejected he usaually continue on with the girl as if she didn't say anything.
David X talks about it rulez of david x that he would grab the girl and always say the last word.
“Being Persistent vs. Being Pushy”
Guys, this is fun stuff, We should all laugh about it
Memories should be positive and fun. You should all look back at
"Once a girl said this…."
"Once a girl rejected me but I answered with this…"
And laugh.
Best Regards
Masked_angel