Agent Zero's Direct Approach Journal #2

Finally back to direct approaching...I'm crossposting this from direct method forum since that place seems to be dead.

Approach #1

I was waiting for the train at about 2 AM and I see this hot girl with a friend waiting for the other train. I want to approach, but there are people in the vicinity so I hesitate before finally approaching. I approached (knowing my train was arriving in 1 minute) and opened with "Excuse me, but you two look gorgeous tonight". She said "thanks" then I asked how their night had been and they kinda complained about the people here in DC (said they are from PA). I wish I had approached earlier cause then I had to get on my train. I didn't go in intending to number close since I just wanted to get the rust off, but man I wish I had started the interaction earlier cause she was fine...and nice too.

At least you approached. Good for you on that.

Next time you feel that anxiety coming on, just ask yourself, "Would I rather be feeling that sting of regret all night like I did before, or would I rather get a rejection and at least be happy that I approached?"

Shout out a big "@!#$ THAT!" in your head, and go for it.

Well,let me drop in my two cent on this approach of yours.

Agent Zero said:

Approach #1

I was waiting for the train at about 2 AM and I see this hot girl with a friend waiting for the other train.

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While I give you props on having the courage to at least get out there and do something,to me,this was a bit of bad judgement here. You're approaching girls at 2am in the morning? At a train station? I guess anything's possible,I just don't think this enviroment at 2 in the morning is the best situation to approach.

I think it's unlikely you'll get a girl's number,but if your goal was just to "get the rust off" like you said,then I guess it's ok.

Agent Zero said:

I want to approach, but there are people in the vicinity so I hesitate before finally approaching. I approached (knowing my train was arriving in 1 minute) and opened with "Excuse me, but you two look gorgeous tonight". She said "thanks" then I asked how their night had been and they kinda complained about the people here in DC (said they are from PA).

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Bad opener. Horrible. You lowered your value to these girls AS SOON AS you opened your mouth. "Excsue me"? You should NEVER say excuse me when you approach a girl. If you were selling something,asking for the time or directions,then this would be ok. But as far as you generating attraction in her to cause her to be intertested in you...no. And as if that wasn't bad enough,you told them they were gorgeuos??? Come on man.
You've been here longer than I have,you should know better than this.
All you did was plant the seeds of her becoming an attention WH0RE to you.


You put them on a pedistal because of their appearance. Now they'll look down on you. They HAVE NO CHOICE but to look down on you because YOU elevated them. YOU CAUSED THEM to emotionally feel superior to you. This is why women act snotty and stuck up. They (because of thier beauty) get all this attention and compliments making them feel like they're somehow ABOVE BEING HUMAN. Then when a guy approaches them,they turn their nose up at him like,"Eww,how dare he! He's not worthy of someone with my beauty".

That's caused by years and years of guys LOWERING THEMSELVES either knowingly or not to women.

Then by the time you get around to approaching her,she's spoiled rotten. The previous 5000 guys who told her she was "hot" have already got her conditioned you respond to you that way.

Agent Zero said:

I wish I had started the interaction earlier cause she was fine...and nice too.

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All women are "nice" when you first meet them. But trust me,had you been able toget her number,if you had spend the next week or two still "praising" her,you'd probably had made another thread talking about how nice she was in the beginning,then all of the sudden her turning rude and having a "better than you" attitude.

Like I said,you have the confidence to get out there and approach,so you're WELL on your way to improving your dating skills,you just have a few little "odds" and "Ins" you need to clear up that'll help things go better for you.


Your verson of a "direct approach" is VASTLY different from mine.

Here,check out this thread of mine. To me,THAT'S a direct approach.

Approach #2

This one wasn't that good, but I have found the perfect spot for approaching so hopefully I step up the volume a bit. I was sat down on a bench about 5 feet from a cute girl with the intentions of approaching. I started reading my book and was there for about 10 minutes before I decided I gotta approach so...

"Excuse me, I just wanted to tell you I think you look gorgeous"
She pauses for a sec, looks up, and says, "thank you, that's really nice of you"

I just left after that. I'm going back to my "are you single" opener cause the compliment opener needs a follow-up which I am not sure of right now.

Dude gotta give it to u, going out there in the wild its what makes u truly alive, keep at this u will figure a way to do direct approaches and make it work. Don't be afraid to try new things, because if something is not working mix it up till u develop that agent zero style.

Work hard and believe in urself and u will get there.

Keep it up

copying and pasting the ones I missed from direct-method

7/22
Approach #3

Crappy approach today. I had been walking around like 30 minutes, no approaches, about to leave and was walking towards the metro. I see a cute girl turn the corner and quickly I decide to approach direct and I say "Excuse me, I just wanted to tell you you look gorgeous". I was totally uncalibrated. She was in a rush and didn't even stop, but said "thanks". This super direct stuff is harder than I thought. But, every approach is a good learning experience cause at least you see it's not the end of the world no matter how bad of an approach you make!

7/24
Approach #4

Changing up my game plan a bit now. I am walking home from work and approaching there instead of in this big crowded park area.

I see this HB8, thin, petite brunette and I approach.

"Excuse me, can I ask you a question real quick?"

HB: "Yeah"

"I was just wondering if you were single"

She giggles and shows me her ring, then we part ways.

It was a pretty weak approach, but I feel much better about my new game plan. The crowded area wasn't working for me and there are enough girls just walking home from work. Also I find it a bit easier cause they are in a relaxed mood, but when I was doing it downtown I felt like it was very hard to get their attention. Sooner or later I'll learn both environments though.

7/25
Approach #5

Walking down the street, see this HB7 approaching. So I approach:

Me: "Excuse me, can I ask you a quick question?"
Her: "What?" (not the best response, but it was a curious tone, not angry)
Me: "Are you single?"
Her: "No, sorry" (starts smiling and walks away)

Oh well...

7/31
Yes! 2 approaches tonight and 1 # close

My night started off sucking cause I was supposed to meet these guys, but couldn't find the bar so I just had to go home. Anyways I decided all was not lost and went into approach mode.

I was waiting for the train and sat down on this bench next to these 2 really hot girls dressed to go out. I waited like 5 minutes, then opened with my "are you single" line. She said "no", but I felt she was lying. So I just bantered for the next 5 minutes or so and I think I sorta won them over, but it showed me that some girls will lie about being single, especially in night game. That's okay though. I think by the end I had her wishing she hadn't lied. This was my first approach of a 2-set too.

Then, when I was getting off the Metro I see this other 2-set waiting by the street. So I walk 50 feet out of my way to approach (first time going out of my way to approach), almost turn back, but go in with "are you single". I talk to them for like 8 minutes and get to know her a little bit and sorta win her over. She tried to **** test me with "where are your friends" but I told her I was going home and my apartment is right up the street. Then I go for the number close and first she's like "give me yours", then I give her a disapproving look, and she agrees to give me hers. So after a minute, I get her number and hopefully it's realy cause she was a 9.

8/1
# is real. I sent her a quick text last night to anchor myself in her mind and so she would recognize my # when I call her on Sunday. She texted back with "haha you're sweet" and I didn't respond.

8/2
After I got laid through online game tonight, I was waiting for the train home back from her place, unattractive (but not ugly) girl sat next to me so I opened her indirect, "what are you reading?" She told me about her boring book, I DHV'd, then she chatted some more about well I wasn't really paying attention, then we stopped talking cause I didn't want to close. I'm going to see how this simple indirect opener would work on a hottie next time I get the chance. Practice is always good. Always practice, even if it's not a hot girl. She was actually not bad though..if her book had interested me, I may have gone for a close.

Weekend Update

Did 2 approaches this weekend.

On Friday night I was barhopping and on my way to one of the bars I go up to this 2 set dressed kinda sexy standing outside a bar. I got up close and they weren't that attractive, but I approached anyways. I think I opened with "Hey, how's it going?" and bantered for a few minutes, but they were just being cold. Oh well, they were the worst kind of woman, woman who aren't hot but think they are.

Just got back from approaching at a coffee shop. I had been stewing over this one for like an hour and approached as I was leaving. She had been aware of my presence though as I walked by her to sit down when I got there and said "bless you" earlier after she sneezed. So anyways I was sitting behind her the whole time, then I got up to leave and turned to her and asked what she was studying. She told me the GMAT and I told her about how I am a tutor. Talked about the test for a little bit and her studying. She asked me to sit down if I had time to help with a problem so I sat down and we worked on a problem. LOL I was basically pitching my business rather than doing a real approach. Anyways I gave her my website (haha a website close) with my phone # on it. I doubt this will go anywhere since she is going to see me as a tutor, but she was kinda cute. I got over major blockers with this one. There was definitely an audience of 1 guy listening in and at least a few other people who may have overheard and definitely saw me approach. I have always been bad at approaching in closed environments like this so it was a major breakthrough. Also being that I approached from behind was a break through.

Did a few today.

In the morning, stopped a woman as she was leaving her house, said "can I ask you a quick question?", she's like "sure", but then I realize that she isn't that hot so I just ask for directions. Her body was nice, but I wasn't attracted to her face.

I went to this meetup happy hour and started off approaching a 3-set, talked to a few guys, then approached another 2-set. It was alright, nothing to really say here. The whole venue was for this meetup so everyone was really there to meet new people so these were more warm approaches.

On the metro home, I was waiting on the platform looking for hot girls cause I want to work on metro game, then I hear these 2-girls behind me saying they hate cats so I say, "why do you hate cats?" but it doesn't hook them and I don't feel like chatting up another 2-set so I don't say much.

Did an approach in Dupont Circle today. Saw a girl sit down on the grass reading something, took about 15 minutes to get the nerve, then went in. Dupont has been tough for me cause it's a big circle and everyone can see you approach, but I was like **** it cause it's also a good place where there's usually hot women so I need to get good at it. I opened with, "excuse me, I just noticed you over here and thought you were cute so I wanted to meet you." or something to that effect. From a distance I thought she was a tanned white girl, but turned out she was Uruguayan. Didn't seem that attracted to me, but we had like a 5 minute conversation. One thing I'm noticing is most girls are skeptical after your opener so you need to immediately follow up with something to get her comfortable and I'm getting good at doing this. At the end, I used Paul Janka's close asking for the number so we can get a drink around there sometime. She said she wanted my # instead. Oh well, I gave it to her even though she's obviously not going to call. Also, when I was walking up to her I noticed she was smoking and I don't like smokers so I almost turned away, but I'm glad I didn't because more practice is better. ALWAYS PRACTICE. The goal is to get good enough at this stuff so when you actually see a girl you like you don't hesitate.

Approach #13

Approached this morning...the morning's gotta be the worst time to approach before work but whatever.

Saw a 9 in a hot dress crossed the street so I'd be passing her. Opened with "excuse me, this is kinda random, but I just thought you were cute and wanted to meet you". That's all I said...froze up. She was backing off and finally said "thanks" after an awkward pause and then said "but I have to go to work". I was basically a robot saying this, no smile or anything. In the morning, everyone is low energy so it's my responsibility to go high energy and I need to plow more, should have at least shaked hands and tried to banter.

Approaches 14 & 15

Went to park for my lunch break. Saw a hot girl, but was starved so took like 10 minutes to sit down and eat lunch. I saw some IOIs and she was still there so after I ate, I opened with "excuse me, I only have a second, but I thought you were cute and wanted to meet you." Names, job, number, bam I'm out.

Another approach in Dupont Circle after work. I'm walking through, see a girl sitting on a bench. Same opener, talked slightly longer, names, what are you up to, job, number, bam I'm out.

Both took like a minute.

Update: Texted today, 14 looks to be a flake, 15 we are discussing a date for next week.

It seems to me that these direct openers aren't as effective as they could be. What's your reasoning for these? To get laid immediately?

I think if you can make these girls laugh they will be more receptive.

great that you're approaching..but

you should really switch up your approach style/lines...
the beautiful/gorgeous thing is too common/afc

and the "are you single" is WAY too direct...

in the dj bible..there's a line for people who aren't very experienced with approaching..it goes something like this

"Hey, i have to get going..let me have your number..and i'll call you up sometime so we can get together."..you're subtly demanding her number..that's the main point...

and it would be best if you had some small talk leading up to that..her name..how she's doing...bla bla

and a big part is how you're asking..body language/tone/etc.

Why should I change anything when I just got 2 numbers for 2 shots on my new opener?

Personally I'm no expert or anything, but I've noticed that opening can be about anything, I don't think your openers are the reason why they are into you. That being said, telling someone they are cute can backfire at times, because it takes away the mystery and the prize mentality. I opened a girl today with "is that a dead hello kitty on your laptop? You are an evil girl". Then she knows a couple things:

1. I'm fun & not creepy
2. I'm not scared to give her crap, and therefore may be a valuable guy vs. all the other dorks out there

I personally try everything, I've called girls gorgeous or whatever, but what seems to be most successful in the long run is to convey fun and challenge. It doesn't have to be at the actual opener, again opener can be "Hey you're wearing shoes too, we have sooooo much in common"
or "do you smell that" or really whatever u want, but for later on in the interaction that prize mentality (chasee vs. chaser) will make life so much easier for you.

remember, they don't like you for your lines, bro...they like u for u

haha...they may like you for you..

but they will never want to get to know you if you come off as a creep/desperate/loser/anything negative basically

so why ruin the chance for them to get to know you with a bad line?..use a simple line that is neutral and allow for a chance for her to get to know you..

unless of course you're just ****ing around..then do whatever you like

Agent Zero said:

Why should I change anything when I just got 2 numbers for 2 shots on my new opener?

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I think you're doing fine. I think your direct approach sounds refreshing compared to the contorted stuff you usually hear around here.
Telling someone they're cute doesn't kill the mystery, because "cute" is not a word that is that big of a deal. It's not like gorgeous or beautiful. A dog or a cat or a baby could be cute.

Anyway, on cold approaches like this you never know what the reason for a turndown or a flake is. Chances are they already have someone.

And jeffthechef said:

in the dj bible..there's a line for people who aren't very experienced with approaching..it goes something like this

"Hey, i have to get going..let me have your number..and i'll call you up sometime so we can get together."..you're subtly demanding her number..that's the main point...

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That's not really an approach, it's the end of a conversation.

Approaches 16 & 17:

#16: See this hot looking woman from behind at Potbelly sitting by facing the window at the bar-like seats. I pay for my sandwich, then approach....WHOOPS, she must be in her 40s and her face wasn't hot...I did my cute opener, then talked for like 30 secs when she mentioned her husband and kids haha so I bailed.

#17: I ate outside at Potbelly, then afterwards opened a cutie I had noticed next door sitting outside reading at Caribou Coffee. This one we talked a little longer and she asked me some questions. I think when I'm not in work attire she is going to want to make sure I have a job and stuff so she asked what I do, where I live, etc. Got her number...first time I acccidentally erased it so I had her enter it again. I keep forgetting names though so I just hand her the phone and she has to enter name & number. She probably figures out I forget her name when I do that so it could hurt my results.


When I ask for the #, I say, "how about we get a drink around here sometime?"...she agrees, then it's like duh I need your # so I ask for it. Basically the same as the DJ Bible.

And on my opener, its like duh, of course I'm approaching her cause I find her attractive...she knows this, I know this....the premise of direct game is you don't hide your intentions.

Approach 18:

I am walking up to Dupont Circle and see this hot petite girl sitting on the bench from behind. I get to the circle do a quick look and yep she's hot from the front too so I approach. I do my standard opener, banter a bit about a book she was reading, then number close. BTW, there was a guy sitting about 3 feet from her who I'm sure was hoping he'd magically get to meet her haha then he witnesses how easy it is...maybe I did him a favor for next time he's in that situation if he'll learn.

Approach 19:

I am walking home and see this girl in a black dress walking towards me, kinda crowded on the street. I get her to stop with my opener, but she says she is on her way to a date and it was bad timing. I said, "yeah really bad timing." Obviously I should have plowed, but I don't have enough experience with street game yet. This is what happened last time with the girl who was going to work. I'm unstoppable if they are sitting down on a bench, but my street game needs work. Next time I get an excuse like that I'll just counter with "Yeah, I'm in a rush too", introduce myself, and ask for her name. It's just getting experience I'm not worried.


BTW, had a great date with Approach 17 the other night. She's hot, smart, and fun to talk to. We kissed pretty good at the end, definitely expecting a 2nd date and we texted yesterday. I'm going out with Approach 15 tonight.