How to get your girl to lose weight

DJinTraining06 · Jun 30, 2009

My gf keeps gaining weight. I been with her 2 1/2 years. She's never been a thin girl, she was thick when i met her. I wouldnt say chubby, thick is a better word. But she was hot, guys are always hitting on her and checking her out cuz she's really cute and has a big rack. Well the past yr she seems to be putting on weight. She definately moved into what I'd consider the "chubby" category, and now when i look at her in certain clothes, she is just plain fat. It's beyond chubby. I would be so happy with thick again. I love her and everythigns goin good with her now but i mean c'mon, this is bad sign of things to come aint it? Shes in her mid 20's and is already becoming fat. Im not a big guy i feel ridculous with her and im starting to be turned off by the weight. Rolls of fat on a girls back is nasty. Maybe im being shallow but whatever. Shouldn't a girl her age be trying to lose wieght? She doesn't even seem concerned. She never works out and i see her eating pizza and quesadillas and fattenign stuff liek that all the time.

Is there any way to get her to lose weight without actually telling her i think shes becoming a whale? Like some kind of mind trick i can play lol

PRMoon · Jun 30, 2009

Have some out door dates, like hiking or jogging with your dogs some after noon. Tons of fun things you can pass of as "quality time" to get her in shape, you just have to change both of your lifestyles a bit. Don't try to force it but suggest it as a way for you two to further get to know one another. Girls eat that sh*t up with a spoon.

Also go online and fine some low calorie meals that taste good. I did that with my girl. She started complaining about her weight over and over again. She's always been hot in my eyes but I can't stand her whining about anything so I just switched up the shopping in the house a little bit and cooked a bit more. After a few weeks she lost noticable weight she loves me even more, and most importantly, the b*tching stopped...objective complete.

Controlling yours or the weight of anyone you're tight with is easy. Just have to mask it the right way.

worship · Jun 30, 2009

LOL what a predicament.

If I was in your situation I'd bail, no man should have to have sex with a fat girl.

Or you could find a clever way to make her insecure enough about her weight to do something about it. If you tell her overtly she might get angry and eat you.

Rollo Tomassi · Jun 30, 2009

Still clinging to that losing horse (or should I say cow?) DJINTRAINING?

Alle_Gory · Jun 30, 2009

I'm getting less attracted to you. You're still cute but if you keep this up, we're not going to be having sex at all.

You need to hit the gym. Come running with me once a week.

Or you can avoid it all together. Just take her one some gym and running dates like others have mentioned.

azanon · Jun 30, 2009

This advice is only for one's wife and worked for me per personal experience:

If you want them to workout, you have to at least workout yourself. They have to see your high standards for your own body and you taking care of it in practice. You have to verbalize how important to you bodily health is pretty much all the time.

Unless the woman is really dumb, she'll take the hint and follow by your good example.

Now since this is only just a girlfriend, take RT's advice and just move on. In fact, I'm not sure I even believe in girlfriends. I think I personally only support plate spinning or marriage.

DJDamage · Jun 30, 2009

Your girl got too comfortable and complacent in your relationship and therefore isn't thinking about trying to look better.

Maybe if you had the DJ mindset and had chicks always flirting with you in front of her, the anxiety of prehaps losing you would make her want to hit the gym and watch what she eats.

You could still sign a gym membership together and hope that she will stick with it and if she doesn't, then prehaps it will be time to end things because she will only get bigger from here.

DJinTraining06 · Jun 30, 2009

Alle_Gory said:
I'm getting less attracted to you. You're still cute but if you keep this up, we're not going to be having sex at all.

You need to hit the gym. Come running with me once a week.

Or you can avoid it all together. Just take her one some gym and running dates like others have mentioned.

She hates jogging. She usually says no to walks too, cuz shes tired from work. She works the normal 9-5. She walks 8 blocks to the train to and home from the train so when she gets home she says shes too tired to walk cuz she "walks" all day. 8 blocks is exercise for a 60 yr old man, not a young woman thats riduclous aint it? She's also always taking naps for no apparent reason too. Its hard to get the point across to her that fatness is not acceptable to me. Lately ive been trying to make hints at her. I keep telling her that im trying to lose 10-15 pounds this summer (i'm not fat, i didnt let myself go, like her, but id like to lose a lil extra weight i put on) I keep making a point to tell her stuff like "i worked out alot today", and "i ate a healthy lunch today." I also make funny comments about fat girls i see on the street and i tactfully say certain girls are hot. Im careful how i say it or else id be in trouble. But other than this im not sure wat to do. I guess ill only say yes to healthy food when we go out to eat and ill drink less so maybe she drinks less. She drinks so much i think that contributes to it. No matter where we go she has to have several glasses of red wine or mixed drinks. She can never just get buzzed she has to get drunk. But other these ideas i dont know wat to do cuz im not home before her most of the week so i cant cook healthy meals for her very often.

Gangster Of Love · Jun 30, 2009

DJinTraining06 said:
She hates jogging. She usually says no to walks too, cuz shes tired from work. She works the normal 9-5. She walks 8 blocks to the train to and home from the train so when she gets home she says shes too tired to walk cuz she "walks" all day. 8 blocks is exercise for a 60 yr old man, not a young woman thats riduclous aint it? She's also always taking naps for no apparent reason too. Its hard to get the point across to her that fatness is not acceptable to me. Lately ive been trying to make hints at her. I keep telling her that im trying to lose 10-15 pounds this summer (i'm not fat, i didnt let myself go, like her, but id like to lose a lil extra weight i put on) I keep making a point to tell her stuff like "i worked out alot today", and "i ate a healthy lunch today." I also make funny comments about fat girls i see on the street and i tactfully say certain girls are hot. Im careful how i say it or else id be in trouble. But other than this im not sure wat to do. I guess ill only say yes to healthy food when we go out to eat and ill drink less so maybe she drinks less. She drinks so much i think that contributes to it. No matter where we go she has to have several glasses of red wine or mixed drinks. She can never just get buzzed she has to get drunk. But other these ideas i dont know wat to do cuz im not home before her most of the week so i cant cook healthy meals for her very often.

She's not motivated. She has nothing to loose. She is complacent, as mentioned above. She is not threaten by the possibility of loosing you. It is very possible you have seen her at her best.

I suggest you wait until she complains about her weight to you. Even if she just mentions it, take the opportunity to adress it and make your point, and get an idea what her attitude is about her added weight. There is no easy way, and you cannot be the one who motivates her. There's gotta be a reward/punishment factor that only SHE can use to drive herself to do it.

DJinTraining06 · Jun 30, 2009

Rollo Tomassi said:
Still clinging to that losing horse (or should I say cow?) DJINTRAINING?

Well shes a good girl, i think the problem has been me, ive been complacent and enabling of her certain behaviors and i think i gotta get her back to where she worries bout her appareance and me in general. I am tryin to lose wieght and get in shape again for a few reasons. I figure if im in great shape ill be more willing to dump her if the time has to come, cuz then i feel i can go out and meet other girls no prob. I think her seeing me all fit and looking great will also be a hint to her that she should lose weight cuz otherwise shell look like a cow next to me and shell feel like shes not good enough.

Bible_Belt · Jun 30, 2009

I figure if im in great shape ill be more willing to dump her if the time has to come, cuz then i feel i can go out and meet other girls no prob. I think her seeing me all fit and looking great will also be a hint to her that she should lose weight cuz otherwise shell look like a cow next to me and shell feel like shes not good enough.

I agree. That is a good attitude.

DJinTraining06 · Jun 30, 2009

Gangster Of Love said:
She's not motivated. She has nothing to loose. She is complacent, as mentioned above. She is not threaten by the possibility of loosing you. It is very possible you have seen her at her best.

I suggest you wait until she complains about her weight to you. Even if she just mentions it, take the opportunity to adress it and make your point, and get an idea what her attitude is about her added weight. There is no easy way, and you cannot be the one who motivates her. There's gotta be a reward/punishment factor that only SHE can use to drive herself to do it.

She never complains about it. I dont even hear her complain about it to her girlfreinds. She's a weird chick, every other girl ive ever know talks about their weight and dieting like every damm day. I guess maybe its possible that shes embarassed and she doesnt wanna bring it up. But i'm not so sure. She seems to have a very high opinion of her looks, she is always saying shes better looking than my friends gf's and stuff like that (which she is by far its kinda obvious cuz they got ugly gf's) but i dunno she just doesnt seem to think theres anythign wrong with her body at all. She gets hit on all the time, i think that might be the problem. They hit on her cuz of her face and chest but i am sure theres a ton of guys who would think shes a cow. Guys have different preferences. Me personally i like them a lil thick, but not fat. I dont wanan feel your back fat when were doing it, or get suffocated when ur on top. If sex has become boring its probbably cuz i cant move her around at all she weighs a ton, what can i do with her in bed, nothing lol. She even said to me once "when i get married im gonna be hot, im gonna just not eat for a year before" And then she says just to warn u tho "im gonna prob put it right back in a few months" That was my openign there to say soemthing to her about it, and the godamm phone rang so i lost my chance lol.

speed dawg · Jun 30, 2009

DJinTraining06 said:
I am tryin to lose wieght and get in shape again for a few reasons. I figure if im in great shape ill be more willing to dump her if the time has to come, cuz then i feel i can go out and meet other girls no prob. I think her seeing me all fit and looking great will also be a hint to her that she should lose weight cuz otherwise shell look like a cow next to me and shell feel like shes not good enough.

You just answered your own question. You've identified the problem, now fix it.

It's funny all my LTR's all my life have mirrored what I did. Gain weight, so do they. Get in shape, so do they.

Trendsetter · Jun 30, 2009

Dump her. It's gonna get worse.

Girls will lose weight to get a man but when they get him they let themselves go. Your best bet, and what has worked for me, is to work out with her. Start by doing the fatx101.com workout. It'll get you and her right in 12 days.

Alle_Gory · Jun 30, 2009

DJinTraining06 said:
She hates jogging. She usually says no to walks too, cuz shes tired from work. She works the normal 9-5. She walks 8 blocks to the train to and home from the train so when she gets home she says shes too tired to walk cuz she "walks" all day. 8 blocks is exercise for a 60 yr old man, not a young woman thats riduclous aint it?

Not really. She's got no energy and motivation. That's why she takes naps all the time. She doesn't exercise so her metabolism is messed up. Do what you can, and be prepared to let her go worst case.

Don't expect her to suddenly become active because YOU want to. It takes time. Try some more active dates. Try something low energy like bowling and then increase intensity. Also healthier foods. Take her to healthier places, slowly.

And make sure she gets that extra motivation. Use the whip and the carrot. The whip could be you leaving her, or not giving attention. The carrot is praising her whenever she does something active. Tell her how awesome she's doing and how she's getting in shape and how you find her more attractive because of that.... etc.

For diet: meats, salads and fats (for flavor) are awesome. Cut the carbs. Less drinking. If she wants the alcohol get her some hard drinks. Lower calories!

For exercise: start slow and gradual. Push her, don't break her. Bowling, then you can move to biking, then to swimming, then etc... increase intensity to the point where you can simply work out together at the gym once in awhile.

horaholic · Jun 30, 2009

Maybe meet yourself a skinny female 'friend' to be your workout buddy.

pLaYtHiNg · Jun 30, 2009

Alle_Gory said:
Not really. She's got no energy and motivation. That's why she takes naps all the time. She doesn't exercise so her metabolism is messed up. Do what you can, and be prepared to let her go worst case.

Don't expect her to suddenly become active because YOU want to. It takes time. Try some more active dates. Try something low energy like bowling and then increase intensity. Also healthier foods. Take her to healthier places, slowly.

And make sure she gets that extra motivation. Use the whip and the carrot. The whip could be you leaving her, or not giving attention. The carrot is praising her whenever she does something active. Tell her how awesome she's doing and how she's getting in shape and how you find her more attractive because of that.... etc.

For diet: meats, salads and fats (for flavor) are awesome. Cut the carbs. Less drinking. If she wants the alcohol get her some hard drinks. Lower calories!

For exercise: start slow and gradual. Push her, don't break her. Bowling, then you can move to biking, then to swimming, then etc... increase intensity to the point where you can simply work out together at the gym once in awhile.

^^This.

I think subtle hints are going to go the farthest. If you flat out tell her she's fat and unattractive she's going to... grab a tub of ice cream!

I think it's actually pretty cool that she's comfortable with herself and doesn't b!tch about dieting and her weight. That's got to be a welcome change! I would also suggest a raw foods, or even primarily vegetarian diet, (I stay pretty thin just because I don't eat meat). Stay away from the alcohol, my goodness that'll plump you up faster then a Thanksgiving Turkey!

I do know how hard it is to work all week and have no energy left over for excercise, but somehow I find the motivation. I often hike the mountain trails here on my own or with a few dogs, and sometimes, if I can find a friend to go with me. Maybe you can tell her you want to spend a day hiking and have a romantic picnic while you're out. Bring fruits and nuts and such...

Good luck!

speakeasy · Jun 30, 2009

One of my qualifications with a woman is that she believe in a healthy, active lifestyle. I can't respect a girl who abuses her body with drinking too much, or drugs, or eating fast food constantly and not exercising. Nor even caring about these issues.

It's good that a woman be moderately vain. I think moderate vanity is a great thing. It keeps you wanting to look good, dress good, and carry yourself good. Like other have said, women will keep the weight off when they are single and looking for a man. But if they're doing it only to find a man, then that weight is going to come back when she finds a guy and gets comfortable. You have to find a woman who works out because SHE believes in being healthy, not just to attract a man. That's the kind of women who will work out whether she is single or been married 15 years.

Teflon_Mcgee · Jun 30, 2009

Why is this sucj a taboo topic for couples?

Here's the reality:

Unless you're really that cool (and most of us aren't) her gaining weight is going to trouble your mind. Don't sweat it, this is normal no matter how cool she is.

TELL HER. You shouldn't be afraid to let here know that YES, PHYSICAL APPEARANCE IS IMPORTANT no matter how much you love someone.

Let her know a healthy body is just as important as a healthy mind.

The first conversations may be awkward and uncomforatble but you'll (you and her) get used to it and before long you can be like, "hey Babe, looks like you need to hit the gym this week."

The important thing is that you create a new paradigm in which:

1. Healthy food choices are always made (as a lifestyle)
2. Excercising becomes a daily habit (as a lifestyle)
3. Both of you uderstand that it's important to keep your body in shape

If you're not prepared to do this then just leave now. Save yourself the heart ache of whishing you had a thin girl and always struggling with the fact that you could be doing better.

Levex · Jun 30, 2009

When buying clothes as a gift for her, get it a size or two too small (just make sure she did wear that exact size before she gained weight).

If she gets upset with you, just say "well thats the size you wore last time i shopped for you, didnt notice your size changed" or make up some other BS that will not make you look like a d1ck.
That way she will get reminded that shes becoming a fat cow, and not think of you as an azzhole for bringing it up.

p.s: and for fvck sake dont buy her a size 2 when she's size 14, be subtle.

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