BPD Women success stories.

ostap1

Don Juan
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Is there anyone out there who went through the LTR drama with one of these witches and either tamed them, had them change their behaviors eventually, worked things out and had/have a successful relationship. Is there such a thing or is it just plain wishful thinking. I'm currently going through the stressed out stage after dating one for a year and she left me for another dude back in March. On one hand I knew she was wrong for me and was a blessing in disguise that she left, but on the other I still think about her constantly and mostly miss the sex and her vibrant off the wall personality. yeah she had major pissed off modes, but when she was fun, she was real fun and that roller coaster ride of emotions is something that I got used too and am now detoxing from. it's weird but I kind of miss it, but know tha tthat type of behavior is not normal.

I don't know about your BPD veterans out there, but it seems like the personality is soooo far out there and soo different that any women I've met in my life that it seems that it is going to be a rather difficult task to find a woman who has a lively personality but is also not crazy and is not a user, gold digger. attention wh0re, etc. I guess what I'm trying to find out from you guys is your sides of the war stories and how you dealt with them and if anyone actually is in a relationship with one of these women and how are you trying to handle it knowing that she has the problem.

I'm starting to feel better but this sh1t still bothers me, and especially when she left me for the dude (who spent 8 yrs. in jail and looks like John Cena) and later on (when she tried to be "friends" with me) told me that she had better sex with him than with me and he has a bigger d1ck. I know she said that because she knew it would hurt my feelings and lower my self esteem but I also know that she is not with him any longer and her feelings are nonexistent as she has no real personality or sense of self worth.

She knows me too well and knows how to push the right buttons as when we first started out as "friends" (she had a bf at the time) I used to get soo nervous around here at times and when it came down to us hooking up months later I actually had ED problems with her (AFC to to the tenth power). I overcame all that but nonetheless she had crazy control over me and it was always her way or the highway but she made it seem like I was in charge (very cunning and manipulative). A complete user who never worked and spent all the time at my house and constantly called me day and night (which made me become very used to her thinking I was in "love"). Man she had me good and now after two months of NC, I am beginning to feel that she will start trying to get a hold of me any day/ week now. I know that I have to be strong willed and not answer. Anyways, any thoughts to share fellas?
 

Bible_Belt

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I have been through all of the same stuff. It's the exact same story, over and over with every guy.

I ended up leaving my bpd girl for a woman who is sane, at least by comparison. But I still talk to bpd girl, even though my current girlfriend is always very worried that I would leave her for the bpd girl - her fears are in part justified because I did that once before, and was with both of them at the same time for several months. Lately, bpd girl has sucked me back into talking to her; she had some scary health stuff, and I have never denied that I care about her, have known her over ten years. But now she is better and texting me all the time, trying to get me to sneak away from my live-in girlfriend.

When you describe your bpd girl, you are describing mine, too. Even though they are so different from most women, the small minority of girls who are bpd are pretty much all alike. Beautiful - mine is a suicide girl - smart, fun, charismatic, and basically very good at making your male brain pump out happy chemicals...that is when things are going well. But then they get mad and say ridiculous things. Mine would say that she was faking it during sex (uh, huh :rolleyes: ) and that I was a big pvssy that she never felt same with. The point is that they are really good at honing in on what will piss you off the most, and then they feel like they win just because you are mad. With BPDs, people are all either 100% good or 100% evil. And which side of the line you fall on may change on a minute-by-minute basis.

The essence of the personality disorder is a fixation upon re-experiencing a traumatic childhood abandonment episode. They will always pick men with whom a successful LTR is not possible, and if one happens they will sabotage it. There is not any real chance of ever having a lasting relationship, because that does not fill their need to experience abandonment. Often, like my bpd girl, they have kids by different men, who each end up raising the kids themselves, because the bpd mother has run off with another guy. The abandonment craving is stronger than even a mother-child bond.
 

KontrollerX

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"Is there anyone out there who went through the LTR drama with one of these witches and either tamed them, had them change their behaviors eventually, worked things out and had/have a successful relationship."

There was a guy a while back on the forum who posted that he thought he got one to stay with him and he was all happy about it thinking he'd won.

He posted that what he did to keep her was provide her with constant drama and change things up constantly.

This is I think what Bible Belt does in a way to keep his BPD interested in him but yeah unlike Bible Belt I think this guy who told the forum his story had the delusional idea that his HPD/BPD wouldn't cheat on him because he was providing her so much drama and keeping her interested in him through that.

No matter how many times I tell it to guys on here only a few get it that even if you do everything right so to speak which means do all the behaviors that will keep the HPD/BPD available to you in the present or in the future they will cheat on you.

Its not a question of if they will cheat but rather when they will cheat and its not always about hurting you it can also be about them getting the fresh new attention supply from a new person since their sense of self is so non existant they'll eventually need an external ego boost from someone new verifying that they've still got it within them to attract someone.

So to conclude I suppose a person could win or have a success story to share about being with these people but they'd either have to be a guy like Bible Belt who is emotionally adjusted and calloused enough to not be harmed greatly by the BPD's trickery and cheating or it'd have to be a guy that knows how to play HPD/BPD's well and also gets off on the idea of his woman riding another man's c0ck because again these women will do that eventually.
 

Captain

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The problem with BPD women is that men who date them try to change them, and change their own behaviour to try to calm or tame the woman. With any other woman, the man wouldn't put up with ridiculous behaviour, so why treat these women any different? There are better women out there.
 
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