Can you guys help me Damascus out?

Damascus

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Hi, I'm a wienie hut jr hut AFC and i have been used many times by women in the past. I laugh like spongebob, ( hes the funniest) and i always walk with my head down, because im scared of people saying mean things about me. They say im not manly because i cry alot. I thought being a Snuggle bear and cute and adorable was what got girls. That's what my momma always told me, and what momma said was the law. My real name in life is Damascus the Third, and i went to private schools, and in grade, middle, and high school i was always picked on, thrown into trash cans, pissed on at the bathroom, teased, and since i was the smartest kid that ever lived, won a ton of academic awards, and even invented an improved version of a Fleshlight, but when i sent ot to the fleshlight people they never called me back.

the popular kids would take my homework and copy it all the time. Those jerks! In high school i only had only had one girlfriend and people made fun of her because she had a lightling bolt on her cheek as a birthmark, and just like me was a hunchback who was naturally beautiful.

So she never shaved her legs when she wore a miniskirt, and was a little overweight, and had the cutest backbraces with flower designs on the metal, and thats naturaly beautiful to me. I had to leave her because she was cutting into my World of Warcraft and Gears of War 2 times, and one of the poular kids said if i beat him in GOW 2, he would invite me to his party, but only if i wore a costume, the man in the cage one. http://www.mooncostumes.com/item/4721 . its 1,400 dollars but its worth it, because girls get turned on by mascots right.? When i go to disneyland the girls always flirt with mickey when their commanders arent looking. Women need to be treated nicer by the guys. Guys are big meanies who touch them alot. It gets my brunches in a knot, and my sword of Avion gets turned on when i hear this. That's my sword i always carry around, and it was named after my first love, the girl i was talking about, her name is Avion.



.

They would call her Frakenbride because she had a big forhead and would walk like frakenstein with her arms out. Well, back to me, i was known as Mangina, because they said my face looks like an infected Vag!na with all the acne i have, and most people can't tell if im a boy or girl, because i wear long hair like my heavy metal heroes. Long live Twisted Sister! I say Im not gonna take it alot, but it never works. and sometimes they call me Princess Damascus, and the guys had fun "rescuing" me by kicking my ass. One time they taped me to a lampost in the city park, and a hobo raped me when he pulled down his pants and forced me to give him a *******. Its felt good thou, even i i couldn't move haha.

iM in college , and im not a virgin, i had had sexual relations with my 56 year old neighbor. Its true when they say the older they are, the more tricks they know haha. Im 5' 9 and around 250 pounds, and work at a computer store for 6 years, and have never been promoted because im not a "people person" or "leadership material". Im studying to be a comedian. Im the kind of person that would rather watch saturday moring cartoons, ( Naruto from here to beyond), than play football or meet girls, but my momma says i need to meet girls now or i won't get my $ 1,726,000 inheritence. Yes, im rich but i have never told anyone that because i don't want them to judge me. My dad and my family are powerful, but they are not proud of me. They made me work for the real life experience, and im always being put down for a rich kid.

Im here because i can't over my maid, shes the prettiest girl, and i want to impregnate her. What do i do? What's the first step. Im really really smart, and with some engineers, i have even build a 5 foot T-rex to scare the neighborhood kids, those richie rich brats! No respect.

Azudragon recommended me here. His the coolist eva! I met him thru his Last.FM account because he wrote a comment on Joe Satriani's page. I sent him a private message because anybody who thinks Joe Satriani's Surfing with the Alien is " The horniest and most orgasmic sound known to mankind" is my kind of guy. I sent told him where he gets his confidence, and he wrote me back saying:

"Go to sosuave.net. Register as Damascus with or without numbers. Go read the Dj bible. Im Azudragon on the forum. Good LucK. Don't private message me unless its all about the music dumbass"

I want to meet girls. what do i do? Where is Azudragon on the forum?

Edit: I sent him a PM and on his Fun Times Thread
 
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Damascus

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P.S I am willing to do almost anything. I really want to change.. I have started reading the DJ bible but i don't understand what kino is. Im perplexed. Im gonna read the pdf called Dj Bootcamp first and do that first. What is the secret to get girls?
 
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Damascus

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I don't look like troll, im human and i feeling you know.

Things i can change:

1. get proactiv for my acne

2. go see my personal trainer Rodrigo and work out

3. go see a stylist and see if they can change my image.

Any other tips you guys? I have a really big fear of rejection because my parents never really took care of me, and my nannys were always mean to me, any good sources to read on how to get rid if rejection?


I read this good article, what do guys think of it?


Top 10 Dating Tips
Dating Tips and Advice for Singles

Whether you are new to the dating scene, are reentering the dating scene, or are a serial dater, you can use dating tips and advice. No one is a dating expert – even the most beautiful and wealthy people all struggle with matters of the heart. Everyone can learn something about how to date more, how to attract the types of people we want to attract, and how to make sure initial chemistry blooms into an enduring relationship.

The truth is, there are no magic formulas, no fail-proof tricks, no cunning ways of trapping Mr. or Miss Right. There are however some essential facts that you should always bear in mind along the way. Dating tips are just that -- tips, not one-size-fits-all guarantees. Different tacks will work for different people. It depends on the situation, who we are, where we are in our lives, etc. However, there are some threads of advice that are fairly universal and can benefit anyone who practices them:

Top 10 Dating Tips

1. Get prepared for dating. If you really want to succeed in the dating game, be ready to commit to dating. Half-heartedness won't work. In fact, it won’t even get you half-way. If you really want to date, put some effort into it. Do some research and think about what you want out of dating. Prepare yourself for the inevitable rejection we all face at some point in dating and commit not to give up.

2. Get your act together. Begin a regime of looking your best. Join a gym, read health magazines, get fit and start a diet. Get your hair cut or styled and begin a new regime of good grooming or beauty treatment. Though it will not find you a date in itself, you will feel a million times more confident about yourself, and others can sense that.

3. Go shopping and treat yourself to new clothes and even a whole new look. Get your image right, one that you can manage and live with, but one that flatters you. Don't try to be someone you’re not, but amplify and accentuate your positives. Throw out those tired jeans, old sweaters or cardigans and spruce yourself up. Your date will appreciate that you demonstrated some effort.

4. Think about what you want to gain from dating and what timeframes you expect. Do you see yourself married within 2 years? If you do, then approach dating accordingly. If you are more laid back and don't take dating too seriously then ask yourself some honest questions about why you are dating and what you hope to achieve. If it is purely sex then ask yourself if you are about to be honest with those you hope to date.

5. Surround yourself with people who will support your dating aims. By following the first four tips you will feel better and be more focused. Don’t sabotage this by sitting around with friends who are negative about love and relationships (often the married ones). Start attending social functions frequented by singles. Sitting alongside couples at dinner parties in suburbia is not necessarily where you need to be right now.

6. Choose those you have a good chance of dating. Be realistic. In other words, your dating is based on the whole package you present as well as just your personality. If you are looking for a glamour girl or boy and want to date someone trendy and gorgeous, great! Just know that others will expect you to be the same.

7. Join clubs, societies, sports events, drama groups -- anything that might help you meet like-minded potential partners. You will not meet people by staying indoors and playing video games – many have tried and failed at this approach.

8. Take time off from dating occasionally if it’s not going well or causing dating fatigue. Recharging your batteries and keeping confidence and optimism levels high is an absolute must. We all hit rough patches, but don’t let your search for love become a death march. Date in phases if necessary.

9. Enjoy dating for what it is, dating. It is meeting people and socializing and spending time in the company of stimulating individuals who may or may not play a bigger part in your life down the road. The fact is, most people have something interesting to offer. While you may not be out on the dating scene looking for new friends, you may well find one or two fabulous people along the way.

10. Never make yourself too available. People like mystery and enigma and the thrill of the chase when dating. As part of keeping up the mystery, do not sleep with your dates early on. The longer a person is made to chase and fall for you within reason, the more likely that love may blossom. (And yes, this goes for both men AND women!) If the chemistry peaks too early, your emotions may never have time to catch up and the relationship will eventually wither away.
 
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You make me want to make start a comedy show about you. Your are very perpendiculous my fellow sky drake. And no i know your not a Perpendiculous since that's not a creature, like a troll ( hint hint). I don't think we can help you out, you need real life professional help my fantasy fictionado


---------------
+ rep if this post helped you out
Come join me and share your thoughts at my Approach Journal and Fun Times Thread
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=159172[/SIZE]
 

Maxtro

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Hey Damascus,

Can you get me Rock Lee's autograph? I'm sure you've seen him time to time in the Leaf Village.
 

Damascus

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Maxtro said:
Hey Damascus,

Can you get me Rock Lee's autograph? I'm sure you've seen him time to time in the Leaf Village.
I wish i could get his autograph, but his a celebrity and is very hard to get ahold of. You can't go into the training centers and gyms were he trains at, without the official headband, and i havent earn my yet. I might get one of my friends to get his autograph, but his a player and always surronded by girls.

I have this poster of him in my room thou:
http://www.foroswebgratis.com/imagenes_foros/0/9/2/2/0/626467RockLee3.jpg
 

Moon-Wolf

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The new youth has gone to shlt ;P

Edit: I didn't realize that I just bumped up a really old thread. I got kinda lost in his trolling way.
 
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