Getting Depressed, Lost my social standing.

I am getting depressed, this morning I woke up and pretended to put a gun to my head and commit sucide.

I had a date planned the other day and I was so stoked that I had met this really pretty, nice girl. I was stoked because this was my first date in a few months and I told all my friends about it.

Well I got stood up and now everyone is asking all these god damn questions and offering to give me tips.

I am really embarrassed right now. I can't get a date because even though I've lost weight I am still 100kg. I feel like a total loser now because all the women I've ever been with have been bat**** crazy. It's like any woman who is worth anything at all won't be attracted to me. I don't have much to offer.

I've been workingout more lately, but by the time I could lose any substantial weight I'll have to move back to my country and help my parents open their business for the season, and that means I'll be entering my annual 4 months of forced celibcy because their business in a small town that I can't escape from.

I really feel like that every woman I meet secretly hates me, because I am not worth it and I shouldn't even try. My friends think I am shy and need "tips," but it's not that I am shy, I don't get nervous or scarred. I simply don't think I am worth it anymore, I am fat and have NO chance.

I am a cronic failure and if I don't start making some better decisions with women and life, I should just end it.

Here is a post from another member you should read.

Bigdada said:

Let me be a living inspiration to you:

you may not believe me, but I'm FAT (as in obese, even have moobs) but I still get women's attention. why? I'm a jackass. I'm not afraid to be assertive, and confident in myself. and I ALWAYS remind women of my sexuality (I'm 18, btw, lol)

my last gf, she was this 5'5, 130lb Mexican girl who almost everyone would rate an 8 out of 10. dark skin, great smile--I did it because I befriended her, and drove her NUTS with my constant reminders that I didn't find her as attractive as the girl's I was screwing (That I reminded her of)

so she got to know me emotionally (which made her attracted to me on that level) but I was a challenge. see, the fat man is supposed to be trying to bang any girl who comes near him, right? WRONG. I straight ignored her so much, she thought I was something special, and felt intimidated to even approach me. lol. straight up.

we're broke up now, but man, I had mack skills. had.

Lol, I should post this in a separate thread...

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Now you said this

I am a cronic failure and if I don't start making some better decisions with women and life, I should just end it.

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Do you plan on making better decisions? Your decisions are pretty simple...

Take your fat ass to the gym every day.
Eat healthy food.
Groom and dress your best everyday.
Do positive affirmations/prayer/meditation everyday.
Talk to women everywhere you go to get comfortable talking to women.

Those are all the decisions you need to make for the next year, done for you. Any more excuses?

SharinganUser said:

I am a cronic failure and if I don't start making some better decisions with women and life, I should just end it.

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Hey, you know yourself better. But before you take the coward's way out, why don't you try a few things.

1. Fix your diet. Also add in B-Complex vitamins and a good multivitamin.
2. Stop caring so much. You're really dependent on other people for attention. You're not a chick, don't act like one because your system is not built to handle such emotion.
3. Go weight training, and do some cardio. Sprints and running is good for depression.
4. St. Johns Wort is good for depression.
5. If this doesn't work, see a doctor.


Your depression is preventing you from making progress. Let it go, enjoy what you do and you will see improvement. At work, school, in the gym, with people... etc.

Let go of all that and enjoy the moment you have with someone. That's all it is. Don't bring your feelings and thoughts with you when you hang out with someone. Leave that sh*t at home.


If you apply these things and they don't work for you, I will eat my shoe.

100kg and how tall? That's not THAT fat... unless you're like 160cm. Don't assume you can't get girls because you're "fat". All it sounds like you need is some confidence, and the best way to do that is just start acting confident in one aspect of your life, then another and another etc. A lot of guys don't even end up talking to girls period... you're at least a step ahead of them. And... 4 months of celibacy is nothing, you would benefit to realize that will power goes a long way... If you can turn on and off the need to have sex, you will find that you have a lot more control in your life in general.

Just because you got stood up by one girl doesn't mean the world is over. Go to a mall. You will see there are plenty of hot girls there. Once you have approached a lot of girls that will get you out of this mindset. Sometimes you have kiss a few frogs before you find your princess.

I went out to a party last night. I was having a good time and was acting goofy and talking with some chicks. I wasn't getting great feed back but I didn't care because I was having fun and getting drunk. Well apparently they don't like me and they got some russian guy to pull me aside and tell me to stop talking to them because they don't like me and they are in love with someone else.

I don't care so much that they don't like me, but to have some Russian mother****er come up to me pretending to be my friend and do her (first russian chick) dirty work was just a huge ****ing slap in the face. I can take rejection, I just don't like that they had to send some ****ing **** to do it.


Then there was this other ***** who actually ****ing ran away when I approached her. That was just plain bull****.

These girls are friends of friends, so the next time I see them I am going to ****ing tell them **** off.

I am good guy, not perfect but I don't deserve this ****.

SharinganUser said:

These girls are friends of friends, so the next time I see them I am going to ****ing tell them **** off.

I am good guy, not perfect but I don't deserve this ****.

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Apparently there is something about you that repels them. Telling them off won't help anyone as it just highlights that you put stock in what they think of you and that it hurts you that they aren't accepting of your advances. How drunk were you? Guys being really drunk is often a turnoff to women unless they are equally wasted.

Sometimes it's hard to make big life changes in attitude and social standing if you're hanging out with the same group that knows you as a dweeb. Try branching out a bit socially if possible.

Don't be bitter and blame them. I've seen a lot of men do that, and they are chumps.

Go to the gym and eat small amounts of food, all of it healthy. Go out and meet random women. Don't worry it you get rejected, just keep going out and improve.

I've said it before and I will say it again: one of the ways we can help along the process of a woman falling in love with us is to create an environment condusive of her doing things for us. In her mind she will subcounsciously convince herself that she must like you more because she is doing x, y, and z for you without being forced to or asked to, etc.

It's much more complicated to describe what I am talking about than that, but my point is you need to start pulling that little trick on yourself. I did. It worked. I was worse off than you in the sense that I came close to following through with what you say has crossed your mind.

But then I stopped and thought about my brother who I love, and what that would do to him. I thought about my Uncle that I was so close with who died a couple years ago from cancer and how I can't let him down. I thought about his daughter, my cousin - who looks up to me and adores me; she would be heartbroken and disturbed...all because poor little me who has money and a nice car and decent looks - got caught up in my own broken frame and gave up because my sensitive little heart was broken over some psychotic cunt..? FUCK THAT! :nono: :cuss: WTF was I thinking? Oh no not me!

It was at that point that I, after more closely than I ever had before considered switching it all off, that I understood it wasn't an option.

It was at that point that I decided I had to come up with an action plan to change myself and change my world.

I read the DJ Bible. I read 48 Laws of Power. I learned meditation. I went to a doc and had my test levels more closely monitored. And perhaps most importantly - I started doing things for myself that I enjoyed. I started to pamper myself by eating good foods and basically treating myself as if I was God's gift to the planet. That is when - what I first mentioned in the beginning of this post - started to make sense to me, because it was then that I found it easier to begin loving myself more. Admiring myself. Finding different ways I can improve and become a better man. The man.

The answers you are looking for can be found in the mirror of your mind. How does the person who you envision yourself as best capable of being, look like? Does he smell like the Polo cologne in the green bottle? Does he drink 7 glasses of water a day? Does he take vitamin b-complex daily? Does he have a slight tan, even if it is in the winter? Does he have a slight grin/smile everywhere he goes? Does he feel good. Does he enjoy being alive. Does he get frustrated easily or does he have a natural pateince about him, because he is a positive person who looks on the Brightside of things?

The secret to having everything you want, including women can be found in yourself. By practicing positive affirmations and telling yourself the things that you wish to be true, instead of talking shit to yourself as you have shown that you do now, and by creating a mega action plan to reinvent yourself into a person who loves himself and a person who is genuine, wide eyed about life, and eager to be a good person and do good - how suprised can you find yourself (little Ross Jeffries for Tyoko-O) becomming this new version of the person who you always knew you could be? That may have been incoherent but basically what I'm saying is if you build it, they will come! Like the movie with the baseball park; what's it called???

You are in more control of your destiny with regards to your social standing and depression than you may think. You can do this. Take control.

Read the first post in this thread and the 7th post in this one.

Find any way you can to love yourself and everything else will follow, including a lifetime of smiles (and some cherries on top - pun intended).

Its late here. Good night!

Good luck!

Thank you, darkstar. That helped me. May God be super awesome to you.

Dude take it easy man! we want you to get better. Work out 2x harder! you can do it. Stop with all the silly negative thought your going to end up crashing yourself. This stuff thats happening to you is just a process of growing, Hold on man your almost there. Keep going! be Positive!