I ALSO realize what has to happen...

LISTEN UP SOSUAVE MEMBERS...

We CANNOT help CapedCrusader08

We simply cannot do it. We've tried over and over and over again,and in the four months he's been here,he's not even almost tried to improve. Guys....GUYS....there's nothing we can do. For every piece of advice we give,he comes back with 3 more questions. Three members will answer those three questions,then he comes back with three more questions to each one of the previous three that were answered. It's a never ending cycle. It's bad enough that he himself is all twisted in his head. Don't let him get you guys all twisted too. WE CANNOT HELP HIM,PERIOD.
To help someone,you need cooperation. In this particular situation,our part is to provide the information,his part is to apply that info to his life. Well,we've done our part. We've done our part repeatedly. I don't even need the help you guys have offered him,yet I myself have learned a few things and benefitted from some of the advice.

We cannot help him guys. We can't. In fact,this one guy all by himself,is having a greater effect on the all the members here than the other way around. He's exactly the same as he was when he first started,yet some of us have grown frustrated,angry,and bitter over this dude. We're getting worse while he remains the same. Ridiculous. Don't allow this guy to drag you down with him. Everybody means well. We all have his best interest in mind,yet 40 threads,thousands of replies,and four months later,the only change has been in us. Guys telling him to F-off,calling him names,telling him to commit suicide and other foolishness. That's not us guys. That's what we've allowed this guy to cause in us.

Some guys here think that Crusader doesn't really want help. I disagree. He actually does want help. The problem is that he's miserable,and misery loves company. Whenever we reply to one of his threads,he has the company. Therefore,since he has company in his misery,that's less of a incentive to change. It's crazy. He actually does want to change,but the very act of us replying to his threads enables him to not change.
It's nuts. The only way we can give him the info he needs to better himself is to reply to his threads,but us replying to his threads makes him want to stay the same. Even this thread in part reenforces some part of him not to change. Sosuave members-GET OUT OF THIS TWIST CYCLE!!!!
The sad part is that we CANNOT get rid of him. There are new members joining everyday,and one of them is going to try to help him, thereby giving him company in his misery. So more than likely he's here to stay. But don't let him infect you. Don't let him make you bitter. Don't let him cause vile,evil words of name-calling and other ugliness to come out of you.

He has said that he realizes what has to happen. Well,I also realize what has to happen. We need to avoid this guy. Peroid. There's nothing he's going to asked that hasn't already answered before. There's no reply we can give that hasn't already been replied before. There's no subject he can bring up that he hasn't already brought up before. He's upset over women and sex,but that's the last thing he need to focus on. Even if he did get into a relationship right now,all this weird,crazy,twisted,insecure ball of madness in his head would just make the girl take off running down the street. All that madness would probably drive her to a therapist.

SAVE YOURSELVES GUYS.

I know. Every time he posts, Im drawn to it, like "Oh my fvcking god, what is he gonna say this time?" He's like the Anti-Pook. We're all waiting for some sign of forward progress, as if we have our eyes glued to a coma-patient, who keeps twitching, but wont wake up, but we cant bring ourselves to pull the damn plug.

lol... maybe they should add a new rule in the forum rules for all the new members.

Rule #1: Do not respond to capedcrusader08

If they ban him, he'll just make a new sn, capedcrusader09.. Besides, I doubt a moderater can morally ban somebody who's almost suicidal on a self help forum.

Ok ok,you've made you're point. I am not suicidal.

But this post,for me at least,only reinforces my own negative state and my own painful reminders. Yes,I have been here some time,trying to figure out how to get out of this,have I done or has anything changed,no. Hence the frustration.

I know I am twisted in the head,but it feels like something beyond my control. Some problem that has manifested itsself and I can't escape from. I am not trying to drag anyone down. Well,that's half true. I honestly sometimes don't realize the affect I have. To me,it's just venting. I sometimes ask myself,what the hell am I doing on here all the time? I try to make myself feel better,then,it all shift's. I mean,you think it's bad the past 4 months,try the past few years for me.

Well,what should I be focusing on? What should I do? Do you know how hard it is to not focus on that sort of thing,when it's going on in front of you all the time,serving as a reminder of how lonely you have felt all this time,how unnormal it makes you feel?

I mean,I try to pysche myself up,but I can't. Something reminds me over and over again,and I get brought down. It stems from something inner.

As for the "weird,crazy,twisted,insecure ball madness",what do I do about it?

I don't think anybody asked you this question yet.. Are you, or have you ever, done any drugs illegally?

If you ever did, depression and loss of motivation is a strong withdrawal symptom after you stop using them, even if it's been years. Psychology class we're learning about addiction.

CapedCrusader08 said:

Ok ok,you've made you're point. I am not suicidal.

But this post,for me at least,only reinforces my own negative state and my own painful reminders. Yes,I have been here some time,trying to figure out how to get out of this,have I done or has anything changed,no. Hence the frustration.

I know I am twisted in the head,but it feels like something beyond my control. Some problem that has manifested itsself and I can't escape from. I am not trying to drag anyone down. Well,that's half true. I honestly sometimes don't realize the affect I have. To me,it's just venting. I sometimes ask myself,what the hell am I doing on here all the time? I try to make myself feel better,then,it all shift's. I mean,you think it's bad the past 4 months,try the past few years for me.

Well,what should I be focusing on? What should I do? Do you know how hard it is to not focus on that sort of thing,when it's going on in front of you all the time,serving as a reminder of how lonely you have felt all this time,how unnormal it makes you feel?

I mean,I try to pysche myself up,but I can't. Something reminds me over and over again,and I get brought down. It stems from something inner.

As for the "weird,crazy,twisted,insecure ball madness",what do I do about it?

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Dude,you already have 5000 threads of your own,why are trying to hijack mine? What do you want me to say? Be confident? Forget the past and move forward? Go out and say "hi" to 5 women,then report back to us? You already have like 45,50 threads full of info to help you out whenever you want. I intended this thread for the benefit of the other members here. I have no advice for you.

You know what, i do get where I'm at with dealing with his posts. I enjoy helping people and giving advice on here. I feel I have enough experience to give advice on here, but I still ask for advice too as it's nearly impossible to ever get good enough to never need advice.

Since I'm somebody that feels good about myself when my advice actually helped another member, it makes me feel like a failure when I can't help him. Which is one reason why I'm still drawn to give him advice. It is frustrating, and I do agree he can't be helped by any one of us. It's hard to ignore when you want to help so badly though.

Yes,I have done drugs illegally. Smoked weed a few times,haven't in years though. I started feeling depressed and motivation troubles long before I ever smoked or drank anything. I have had trouble with alcohol in recent years as well,esp the past 2.

yeah.i get it.inspirational video. that still doesn't solve anything for me. It's more than just being able to/not being able to approach women. It's something else entirely.

CapedCrusader08 said:

yeah.i get it.inspirational video. that still doesn't solve anything for me. It's more than just being able to/not being able to approach women. It's something else entirely.

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You are beyond help. You should accept your lack of success, and wait for your death.

CapedCrusader08 said:

yeah.i get it.inspirational video. that still doesn't solve anything for me. It's more than just being able to/not being able to approach women. It's something else entirely.

daygameguy said:

You are beyond help. You should accept your lack of success, and wait for your death.

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There. You see what I mean? This is exactly what I'm talking about and what I said in the original post.
I'm not saying that the dude is beyond help. I'm just saying that WE can't help him. We can't. So far,the only thing that's been accomplished by us concerning this guy is us wasting hundreds of hundreds of our posts,and member after member angryly lashing out at this dude. That's it. I challenge any member here to name one good thing that's come out of us trying to help him. Just one. This reply of yours is not like you Daygame. You've always given sound advice to anyone you thought you could help. This thing you said about him accepting his lack of success and waiting for his death isn't you,it's this guy's negativity effecting you. I've never,ever heard you say something like that to someone seeking help,which just proves my point:we can't help him. When we try to help him,it turns us bitter.

SOSUAVE,JUST LEAVE HIM ALONE.

CC,

you must look for help outside of here.
You must look to parents, family, relatives, friends, counslors, human resources help at work, ANYBODY but here.


You need serious medical help.


YOU NEED SERIOUS MEDICAL HELP.


Please, do yourself a favor, help yourSELF out, man.
Go to a therapist.
Go to some sort of counseling.


Good luck.

I agree with the OP. Just put the guy on your ignore list. He does drag down the spirit of the board with his useless cries for attention. If I were a mod I would ban him.

I second this thread let's end this madness lol.

daygameguy said:

You are beyond help. You should accept your lack of success, and wait for your death.

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Hahahahahha

I've never seen Elstud and CapedCrusader08 post in the same thread. Think about it. Coincidence? I think not.

horaholic said:

Guys, stop feeding him, for christ's sake. Dont respond to him.

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I wish it were that simple,Horaholic. Now personally,I don't reply to his threads,but the problem is that new members who join up here will probably try to help him out of ignorance to his neverending mental issues. Crusader may be miserable where he is right now,but each reply he receives makes him feel a little bit better. That's why he won't actually use our advice. In order to get out of this twisted cycle he's in,it will take time and hard work,but he'll feel better. But why go through all the time and the hard work to feel better when he can instantly feel good just by making another thread. He's substituted the information,the content of our replies,for the act of us replying. I guess he's figured it'll be too hard and take too much time to apply our advice to make things better. So instead of doing all the hard work,it's easier just to make another thread and feel good about all the replies/attention he gets.