Yeah but is she INTERESTING??

A thought came to my mind the other day while talking with some female co-workers...

They were asking me who - at work - I would sleep with or date if I could have whoever I wanted. I told them to guess. Now, I guess this is where I differ from other dudes, because they ran through a list of hot girls and I was like: "nope", "no way", "not her" and they were dumbfounded by my responses. They were like "but EVERYONE likes HER..." etc, etc
I only then realized that yes, many girls are HOT (like extra spicy jerk chicken bathed in tabasco) BUT...I need more than hotness to be attracted...

Of all the girls at my work that would be 10's or even 8's or 9's to the other guys, I see many of them as farther down the scale. Waay farther down.

For example:

(and these are all fake names)

Esther...is smoking hot, great body, nice face...BUT shes not very interesting at all. She works, goes home, watches TV and sometimes goes tanning or shopping. And she's not a very good employee either. NEXT!

Veronica...BIG t!ts, great hiney, killer smile, excellent worker...BUT...again she does nothing of interest outside of work. She's all about movies, and shopping and drinking at clubs...and THATS IT. A little better than Esther but still...NEXT!!

Esmeralda...as far as looks, shes about a 6 or 7 out of 10...great body, crap hair, couple crooked teeth but a nice smile...AND she is into photography, plays like five instruments (or more), draws and paints, works out daily, and is like a font of knowledge...she can answer almost ANY question. SOLD!!

There is a lot to be said for a woman who actually DOES things, because I think far too many just sit at home or chill at the mall waiting for a MAN to make their lives complete. And thats fine, I reckon. The more they spend time on their hair and nails the hotter they will look while I'm giving it to them, BUT beyond intercourse there is nothing to them, they might as well be blow-up dolls.

On the contrary, after "rodgering" Esmeralda, we would have a plethora of things to do together - play guitar, go on nature walks with the camera, have deep conversations about the nature of the 4th dimension, etc etc.

TONS of women are hot, or can manipulate their looks to be hot. It is not special or unique. But far too few are actually "AMAZING" - which I count as being not only good-looking but interesting by means of having interests OUTSIDE of themselves and having some depth of character.

SO...I would say to all my fellow AFC's (I'm still a member) keep this in mind when you are getting nervous about talking/picking up hotties. You might think shes tremendously hot as far as looks, but go TALK to her and see if her personality is also HOT. DONT BE AFRAID to approach her - she is not special or unique, shes just another chick with lots of makeup on or is blessed with good looks. Go up to her and find out if she has a great personality or not. If she has a great personality AND is also hot, THEN you can get nervous (lol)

Ask yourself "yeah but is she interesting?" then go and find out...

great post, thanks

and just to follow up, once she knows you think she's boring, she starts to want you . . .

Hey Sam, I got a couple of thoughts regarding Tabitha. It could be that maybe she has a policy against dating co-workers or maybe you're just not her type, and that could be why she doesn't light up around you. You ever see how a girl will be all animated around one dude, big happy smile on her face and eyes all lit up and chatty, and then another guy she's not interested in talks to her and she looks like what a yawn would look like if it were a girl? So maybe it's not that she's boring.

But this also caught my attention:

>> She's always very friendly and tells me how funny I am.>>

That's an IOI, isn't it? Why don't you try isolating her outside of work one day and see how it goes?

Soylent, most people aren't all that interesting, period.

Come on, man...if Esther or Veronica ripped their clothes off and jumped on top of you, would you throw them off?

WTF are you doing looking for "girlfriend material" at work anyway? You don't want a corporate relationship.

I hear what you're saying...sometimes girls are just so lame that it's hard to even sarge them. Which is why God invented KINO.

thedeparted said:

and just to follow up, once she knows you think she's boring, she starts to want you . . .

Click to expand...

This is all really one big game that you can never put your gaurd down to, including in marriage if you want to have successful relations with women.

squirrels said:

Come on, man...if Esther or Veronica ripped their clothes off and jumped on top of you, would you throw them off?

WTF are you doing looking for "girlfriend material" at work anyway? You don't want a corporate relationship.

Click to expand...

Haha, no I would not refuse Esther or Veronica at all, I'm just saying that I don't judge a womans attractiveness on looks alone...also, we were just having a discussion about hot girls; I'm definitely NOT looking for girlfriend material at work.

Basically, this post was to help ME and other AFC's who put too much weight into a womans looks and thus get afraid to approach her. I find it easier thinking in this way when I approach women. There is much more to people than looks and I bet TONS of afc's are scared off when the woman is hot.

I currently use the mind-set like: "ahh, shes pretty hot, but she might be a total psycho, so I wont let her good looks scare me into not approaching, I'll go and see what she's about"
...but my mindset USED to be: "she so f-ing hot, oh my god, I can't possibly talk to her, she's way out of my league...etc"

As far as just "getting laid" - I couldn't give a damn about her personality in this case, but even still I would tread carefully since some women take one-night stands very seriously and can get flakey, so personality and interests do count for something, I think, EVERY time. If there are two girls both equally attractive - lets say they are twins - but ONE is smarter and more interesting or more mature, I'm going to go for her first. But I would still DO both of 'em...