Fellas, this will save you time and trouble

Fellas, this will save you time and trouble: The 2 Strikes Rule!

THE 2 STRIKES RULE!

Let me simplify your life with a little something I wrote

WHAT?: THE 2 STRIKES RULE is the common sense rule which reminds you that if a woman is interested in you as a man/lover, she will not deny you 2 times in a row. It follows the basic fact of life that women will not give you time and attention unless you are attractive to them. Most guys complicate their lives trying to figure them out when they aren't getting what they want out of women, yet they really aren't that difficult if you can accept the fact I stated (if they want you they will not deny you) and follow the 2 STRIKES RULES.

If a woman is in any way interested in a man she might deny him once (and we'll give them the benefit of the doubt) but not twice in a row. You give a woman 2 chances to give you what you want. Do you want a date? do you just want to talk to her on the phone for the first time? a kiss? Giver her 2 strikes. If she likes you she won't deny you twice. If you keep at it after more than 2 strikes you are wasting your time with a woman that isn't attracted in you as a lover.

WHY: The 2 STRIKES RULE will only make you put time and effort on women that you actually have a chance with plus it will save your dignity and self respect, and remind you of a basic principle about women (if they want you, they won't deny you twice in a row). Besides it will keep you from being labeled as a creep by women cause really 3 tries is too much.
HOW?: This rule applies to all aspects of dating. Whether it be asking her out and not geting a date (1st strike), not getting a call from a girl you met the other day (1st strike), kiss close attempt (1st strike) etc etc etc
IMPLEMENTATION: It is simple to implement this rule. Follow the 3 steps after the 1st strike

1. Forgive
2. Benefit of the doubt
3. 2nd try

If they get a 2nd strike, THEY'RE OUT!

denied you for a date? flaked on you? ignored you? not called you back? resisted your kiss attempt? refused to give out her cell?? did not follow your commands? FORGIVE, BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT, GIVE IT A 2ND TRY WHEN YOU THINK THE TIME IS RIGHT, if that fails...2ND STRIKE! THEY'RE OUT!

SCENARIOS

Scenario 1) you call a girl to ask her out, tells you shes busy but she was giving you all kinds of signals the other day! what do you do?
Answer: If a woman is hot for you she will make time for you the first time you ask her out. If she really does have a legitimate reason (work, school, family, whatever) go ahead and try again! remember the 3 steps

FORGIVE
BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT
2ND TRY

If you are denied the 2nd time you ask her out, 2 STRIKES! YOU'RE OUT!

Common Sense: If a woman is attracted to you as a man she will not deny you twice. Sure she can have a legitimate reason the 1st time but a 2nd time? better for you to focus your time and energy on women that are really attracted to you. Please remember that women come up with all kinds of bs to deny the wimpy men that ask em out. I don't care what excuse she gave you, if she leaves you hanging for a 2nd time in a row it is time for you to move on. She does not want you as a man.

Scenario 2) you call a girl you met the other day and she doesn't answer and it's been a couple days, what do you do?
Answer: If you met a girl and she was interested in just being your friend she would answer. If she doesn't even answer your first call you can pretty much forget about her BUT if you want to be nice...

FORGIVE
BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT
2ND TRY

If you don't get a response the 2nd time you call her, 2 STRIKES! YOU'RE OUT!

Scenario 3) you go for the kiss close, are denied, what do you do?
Answer: If she wants you then you won't be denied, but maybe she isn't ready yet? or maybe you haven't built enough attraction and rapport? if so you can wait for a 2nd try later on..

FORGIVE
BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT
2ND TRY

yup you know it..2 STRIKES! YOU'RE OUT!

Common Sense: So you tried to kiss her again the following week and she turned her head?, 2 STRIKES! YOU'RE OUT! if she was interested in you sexually she would have kissed you as you already tried before and she knows a 2nd attempt pretty much should tell you that she doesn't want you (even though most guys can't understand that fact but she doesn't want to just say it). Definitely not interested in you as a man.

FOR THE SKEPTICS

So you don't want to follow my advice? So still think you have a chance you hopeless afc? go ahead and break the rule and ask her out again some other time so you can only be denied again and she can let all her girlfriends know how creepy you are (and that is a really bad word for a woman to use for a guy). Go ahead and try a third time maybe you will get a different answer from the first 2...NOT!!

3 strikes is only 1 more strike after 2 but it really does make a huge difference.

The strikes can be labeled as
1st strike: Benefit of the doubt
2nd strike: Decider
3rd strike (if you go for it): the self dignity removing finger crosser (cause this is what you're doing, crossing your fingers and removing your self dignity if you try more than twice)

CONCLUSION
Use this rule in all aspects of dating to simplify your dating life. There are so many scenarios where you can use the rule. If you have any questions or scenarios on the implementation of this rule, just ask.

Good post. I've been doing this myself. If she doesn't answer her phone twice, I delete it and move on. a lot of the time, I'll get called in a week or two.

I like this post, it makes it a lot simpler, but does it change any with a girl you've hooked up with a few times already, do they get a 3rd strike?

hondo928 said:

I like this post, it makes it a lot simpler, but does it change any with a girl you've hooked up with a few times already, do they get a 3rd strike?

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It doesn't change how women work, women won't deny a man they want twice.

example: so you hooked up with a girl a few times. You haven't seen her in 2 weeks. You call her asking what's up, she doesn't answer. Ok so you try calling her again 4 days later, she still doesn't reply, what is going on here? this b|tch was all into me and we had a lot of fun!

the above is a typical scenario you can find in a thread on sosuave. Why does the guy complicate himself so much?

would you not answer the call from a woman you want to F***??? twice in a row? NO!

a lot of things can happen in 2 weeks. Maybe she found another guy, maybe she died, maybe she found religion, who knows! the fact of life still remains the same, if she wants you she won't deny you twice. So at that moment in time she does not want you anymore or is not interested, get that thru your head! you already gave her 2 chances to get what you want, 2 STRIKES! YOU'RE OUT!

still think she wants you? maybe she was having huge personal problems? the fact of the matter is that women won't deny you twice. You gave her 2 strikes, she got your calls, never answered, that shows low interest level, so now you go pursue other girls and if you happen to get a call from her up to you to answer. Let her do the work, you already gave her 2 chances.

Confident persistence > this.
Unless you're going for a dime a dozen girl, then sure, don't bother putting effort into her.

Nice Tip...No Doubt!!

Sounds good to me.

Excellent tip.

MisterMcGee said:

Confident persistence > this.
Unless you're going for a dime a dozen girl, then sure, don't bother putting effort into her.

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confident persistence and the 2 strikes rule are compatible.

Let's say you use confident persistence to finally get a date with a girl you been pursuing for a month. You go on a date, it goes well and you have fun. You go on a second date and you attempt the kiss close and she turns her head.

Now ask yourself if you attempt to kiss close in the future and she refuses, just how much "confident persistence" do you have in you with a girl that is showing she is not interested in you as a man at the moment? and by "confident persistence" i mean patience. Are you going to let her strike you out 3 times? NO! I say YOU GIVE HER 2 strikes. You need to make yourself the prize. Your time is valuable, you only live once, make yourself the prize not her! if she isn't giving you what you need whether it be for not being attracted to you as a man or for whatever reason, time for you to give her 2 strikes.

f283000 said:

confident persistence and the 2 strikes rule are compatible.

Let's say you use confident persistence to finally get a date with a girl you been pursuing for a month. You go on a date, it goes well and you have fun. You go on a second date and you attempt the kiss close and she turns her head.

Now ask yourself if you attempt to kiss close in the future and she refuses, just how much "confident persistence" do you have in you with a girl that is showing she is not interested in you as a man at the moment? and by "confident persistence" i mean patience. Are you going to let her strike you out 3 times? NO! I say YOU GIVE HER 2 strikes. You need to make yourself the prize. Your time is valuable, you only live once, make yourself the prize not her! if she isn't giving you what you need whether it be for not being attracted to you as a man or for whatever reason, time for you to give her 2 strikes.

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I am a big fan of the two strikes rule. In fact, I've used it myself not long ago. I ask girl out, she says yes, I set date and time...on the day of the date she says she has work and pushes the date back a couple days (STRIKE 1)...on the new day of the date, I get stood up (STRIKE 2!!). I got a text a few hours later with her apology, but I didn't have any of it. I just told her I'd "see her around" and ended it there. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

As for confident persistence, I like the sound of that too, but I'm still learning what exactly that really is in terms of pre-first date. A girl I "like" said she's busy till the Thanksgiving Break, 9/10 times I say game over. However, this confident persistence thing says if I just be myself and act as if nothing has changed (more or less), there's a chance it may work? This girl's cool enough and I don't know her really well yet, maybe it's worth a shot. I actually just made a thread on this ("Worth Another Shot?").

Anyways...I agree in that both work. I'd use "confident persistence" until I swing and miss for "Strike 2!" :yes:

I used the 2 strike rule recently as well. I had 2 number closes from a sarge. I texted both of them and none replied. I gave them the benefit of the doubt and waited a couple more days and this time I just called them, both did not reply. That was it. A third time would have just made me a creep.

The 2 strikes rule saved my dignity, time and effort. Sure I learned a lesson i'm not txting a # close again i'm calling or leaving voice mail, but even so if they had ANY interested in me even as a friend they would have replied to my txt. The rule works because it is common sense.

there are girls out there who are genuinely busy. there are also others who aren't gonna put you at the front of their priority queue simply because they really don't know you yet

the one good thing about the rule is the frame, because it helps a guy eliminate needy behavior. it's dumb to chase and put in that much effort when you don't even know the girl yet. This has nothing to do with prizing either, it's what you do naturally when you come from a frame of abundance.

as far as reading a girl's interest level though, the rule tells you nothing and you'll end up nexting a lot of girls prematurely that you could've had with a little more persistance

it's kinda like the don't call for X days rule. once you've gained enough experience and are no longer needy or outcome dependent, all these rules are meant to be broken

The Comeback Kid said:

I am a big fan of the two strikes rule. In fact, I've used it myself not long ago. I ask girl out, she says yes, I set date and time...on the day of the date she says she has work and pushes the date back a couple days (STRIKE 1)...on the new day of the date, I get stood up (STRIKE 2!!). I got a text a few hours later with her apology, but I didn't have any of it. I just told her I'd "see her around" and ended it there. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

As for confident persistence, I like the sound of that too, but I'm still learning what exactly that really is in terms of pre-first date. A girl I "like" said she's busy till the Thanksgiving Break, 9/10 times I say game over. However, this confident persistence thing says if I just be myself and act as if nothing has changed (more or less), there's a chance it may work? This girl's cool enough and I don't know her really well yet, maybe it's worth a shot. I actually just made a thread on this ("Worth Another Shot?").

Anyways...I agree in that both work. I'd use "confident persistence" until I swing and miss for "Strike 2!" :yes:

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I asked a girl I see at our part-time workplace once every 1-2 weeks out casually a couple/few months ago. Mind you she's 17, I'm 19, and this is a teenage part time job.
She said yes, seemed happy (just her being polite likely, it was over the phone), we would see each other before work the next day. Bam, nope. She flaked. I won't go into details, even though there aren't many.

Anyways, I saw her at work that day, it was obviously kind of awkward but I decided to just act normal and not give her much attention or anything for the course of the shift. Later on she was helping me do whatever and I decided to ask her for her number.
She (pretended like she) didn't hear me ask. Strike 2, right?

Well, I let that second strike mean something other than "NEXT" to me, cause I wasn't ready to let down (for numerous reasons - she didn't really know me, I was slightly AFCish at the time, slightly nervous, no rapport, bla bla) and I wasn't convinced I gave it 'my all'. I wouldn't be satisfied if I nexted her cause it'd always be a 'what if' in my head, for many reasons.

So I just decided to lessen contact, give her little to no attention (simply be polite, sort of thing), improve myself, take it easy and mingle/laugh/joke/haveagoodtime with others at work, have a positive frame, and other crap.
I was improving pretty quickly as a person (what a time to go through a transitional phase, eh? In the middle of your 'conquest' for an HB9).
I didn't bother 'trying' when it came to approaching or communicating to her and... well I could go on... I basically just stopped doing pseudo AFC stuff. I wasn't an AFC back then, but I was still slightly naive and not really smooth.

Basically, things just incubated for a while, and I saw her beginning to react differently to me. She was always nice to me ever since I met her in early August. After the flake incident, it was clear that she wasn't ready for anything like that, and I'd find her occasionally locking up in front of me, shying up in conversations, walking away, etc.
I knew that, if this would get anywhere, she'd have to start properly sizing me up because she was aware by that point that I'm interested in her.

And that's what began to happen during this post-flake period - sizing me up. She didn't knock me out of the field by continuing the awkward 'locking up' and 'appearing slightly uncomfortable' once I'd start a 1 on 1 conversation with her. These are things she did right after the flake, but it didn't last for long at all.
She began paying more attention to stuff I did, without getting involved or anything. She'd see me interact with other people, customers, and so forth and I was just free being myself, doing my own thing, and not clinging at all.

So for the past 1ish month (meaning around 2 or 3 meets), I can basically see the 'results'. I didn't totally ignore her or drop off her map, though. I did around 1 month (meaning around 2ish meets worth) of 'not giving her attention'. Then afterwards I'd start each shift not giving her attention and see her be the first to approach me for the night. I'd notice by the end of the night that I hadn't really approached her at all, and any conversation we had was initiated by her.
Now at this point, things aren't exactly at the point where she shows obvious signs of interest (due to the details of my situation which don't concern you ), but that's because it's up to me to make another move soon. I'm 100% myself, a budding DJ, I feel great, she's been getting to know/see/experience "me" as a guy, and if she turns me down at this point, then I can comfortably NEXT her if I so choose to.
But I can do this because I didn't choose to NEXT her. I've been persisting and while my tactics don't seem to be that of a typical persister, I ensure you it's due to the specifics of my situation.




Keeping myself in the game in 'my situation' is probably different than some other situations, but it's these situations that benefit from confident persistence. Calling a girl who you've met at a bar or that you don't know more than 3 times without an answer... there's nothing to gain there by being persistent. She literally is just a fish in some random arse pond. But when it comes to social circles and women you actually know, then confident persistence can be applied because the exposure and opportunity is there.


My situation is also special in a few other ways, and I've been being confidently persistent while keeping these 'quirks' in mind. That's the important part. If you don't want to bother analyzing the situation a tad and considering the girl's personality and character and comfort levels, then yes NEXTing is the best option. Usually, when some random girl isn't showing high interest, NEXTing her is the best option. No doubt.


So yeah, I could've nexted this girl back in late August when she got 2 strikes in one day, but that wouldn't be fair to me nor to her. It's all up to you, and there's no harm in keeping yourself in the game if you feel like you can overcome the obstacles.

ready123 said:

there are girls out there who are genuinely busy. there are also others who aren't gonna put you at the front of their priority queue simply because they really don't know you yet

the one good thing about the rule is the frame, because it helps a guy eliminate needy behavior. it's dumb to chase and put in that much effort when you don't even know the girl yet. This has nothing to do with prizing either, it's what you do naturally when you come from a frame of abundance.

as far as reading a girl's interest level though, the rule tells you nothing and you'll end up nexting a lot of girls prematurely that you could've had with a little more persistance

it's kinda like the don't call for X days rule. once you've gained enough experience and are no longer needy or outcome dependent, all these rules are meant to be broken

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Agreed 100%. This is exactly what I'm talking about. This 2 strike rule is an easy mindless way to make it appear like you have a solid frame. No offence meant to the OP.
You can demonstrate having a strong frame without kicking the girl out of the picture just because she got 2 'strikes'. And since 2 'strikes' is any form of flake at all, at any time in your relationship (not depending on her early comfort levels, fluctuating interest levels, or availability, or whatever), you definitely will end up 'striking out' many girls prematurely.

all girls are unique, many things are the same with girls but saying that 2 strikes with every girl isn't right i think, its a basic theory, but if you have that gut instinct to take the 3rd strike go for it or you will regret forever.....

Regret what? As far as I have experienced, the 2 strikes rule is almost always the way to go. Like I said earlier, if the girl is into you, she will make an attempt when you break contact. And if she isn't into you, why waste your time? Sure if you ask enough times she may give you the time of day, but I personally don't have the time for that. Of course, if you don't really have any plates you do have time and may be willing to go the extra mile.

This 'rule' doesn't take the girl, situation, or circumstances into account and only attempts to protect/maintain your frame no matter what. That's fine if you're looking to get a quick lay or don't want to waste time with certain girls.

This should really be second nature. Wether you're just trying to score a girl for a lay or are dealing with someone you feel has more serious potential.


Try twice. If no buy, then it's all up to her to come to you if there's to be any follow up at all.

Seriously, someone rejecting you twice on a date offer is really not interested. NOT EVEN IF SHE HAS A LEGITIMATE REASON SUCH AS WORK OR SCHOOL.

A girl who is interested in you will MAKE TIME to see you. Trust me on this and everyone else who says this. No time = no interest. No time right now entails that they make you a counter offer or offer to let you know when they have time and ACTUALLY doing this as well.

One important part to keep in mind: this is provided you aren't on top of her like a puppy dog, offering and being rejecting on the first date offer, and then again on the second less than a week after the first. You can't expect someone to make time for you if you make two date offers in one week when that week is already fully planned, for example.

Be patient. Don't rush it. Interest doesn't spoil unless you spoil IT. People who are really interested in you will MAKE time for you.

ready123 said:

as far as reading a girl's interest level though, the rule tells you nothing and you'll end up nexting a lot of girls prematurely that you could've had with a little more persistance

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the fundamental problem here is that you are forgetting that trying twice IS PERSISTENCE IN ITSELF! You tried once, got shot down, got back up and tried again. When a girl says NO the first time give her the benefit of the doubt, BUT IF SHE SAYS NO AGAIN??? I think she means it fellas.

Hard for guys to get it thru their heads that if a woman is really interested in you as a lover in any way she will give you a chance and won't turn you down back to back times. For example if a girl goes out with you the first time you ask her out she is attracted in you as a possible lover that is plain to see. If a girl turns you down the first time but goes out with you the 2nd time, you give her the benefit of the doubt for whatever reason she had but you know she wouldn't be giving you the time of day if she wasn't attracted to you as a possible lover.

I'm not saying confident persistence doesn't work, but if she got 2 strikes already and you keep on with "confident persistence" you are working with a girl that isn't giving you the interest level and you aren't attractive to her as a possible lover. Do you keep putting time and effort or do you go with girls that won't strike out the first 2 times? up to you.

I absolutely LOVE this thread. It's basically just plain common sense. Like f283000 said,some things about women are just plain simple. If she wants to spend time with you,then she'll spend time with you. It really is just that simple. If you ask her out,and she says she's busy that day,but she's really interested in you,then guess what? SHE'LL suggest another time if she can't make it on the day you asked. I realize that a lot of women's behavior is confusing,but some things are just as plain as they appear.

Good stuff. It's the same rule of thumb my friends and I have been using pretty much forever. More guys should give this a go. It'll save a lot of frustration and wasted time.