deep breath.....here goes. My Journal

I've made a decision today to change my life. I am determined to become
successful with women, expand my knowledge, cultivate meaningful relationships
with people not just friends or acquaintances.
Today I buried a relationship of 3 years which cost me all, love, "friends",
and a lot of time and effort from my part. But enough of that because this
is where the fun starts.

I've hit rock bottom and there is nowhere else to go but up.

Reports later tonight.

THINGS IM WORKING ON:

#1 Get out my comfort zone with anyone: guys/girls/pets or whoever is willing to listen
#2 Finish BC week #3
#3 Forget about my oneitis one and for all (toughest by far)

So after making this thread I headed to school to study for calc 3.
All I had in mind was to just talk and improve my social skills.

Computer Lab:
I get in and while checking homework online I noticed this middle-eastern ish looking cutie sitting behind me...I start brain storming for something to say..got nothing..then I remember this the SAY SOMETHING, ANYTHING

Enri: hey, do you know what time the lab closes
looks confused for a bit then lightens up
bh7?: ehhmm.. im not sure,
hb7: i think around 6?
Enri: ah, cool, thanks!
didnt know what else to say and finished with a smile to which she reciprocated...she then finished what ever she was doing and left.

Later at the 3nd floor library:
me walking around trying to find someone to talk to
I spot this girl/guy from my math class doing some homework
Now before I'd just say hi or not even that and walked by them
but I decided to go sit at their table and B.S around for a little
ended up staying for a while, talked about school and whatnot
all to keep me in a talktative mood

1ST floor library:
Coming down from talking to my ^ new friends I went to borrow a stapler
from the circulation dest, As I'm putting together something I spot this hb7 latina
glance at me and down at her book all alone at a two chair table.
now this room is filled with tables with 10+ people and many of the empty
so I take a deep beath and walk to her table:

Enri: "Mind if I join you?"
latina: Looks up up at me, little puzzled and says "no, not at all" then looks down at a book the size of an encyclopedia
Enri: I quicky pick up on this and said something about the book, as i sit down
latina: chuckles on my comment
Enri: What is it?
latina: Accounting
Then proceeded into a full conversation of her classes, where she lives, her
major, etc. She made it pretty easy to go from one topic to the next
After about 10 mins of talking I remember I hadnt asked her name lol
I get her name, Martha, but she doesnt ask for mine _BURN_ i think to myself heh
I ask where she's from then she asks where I'm from.. finnaly i think an IOI!
She laughs when I tell her whenre im from wtf?
Enri: "woah whats with the laugh" in a exaterated tone
Latina: "oh no nothing" with a smirk "my husband is from there"
me thinking ahahaha! -BURN AGAIN-

So she ends up telling me shes got a husband, kid, pet, the works lol
we talk some more and I tell her i have to go study

Well so much for my bravery lol it was fun though

later I talked to this other girl who was standing right next to me in a empty
hallway, not my type at all but what the hell..
She had her eyes glued to her iphone so I asked her some general Qs
about the phone, it would have helped if she'd look up when she answered
but mehh..So i didnt bother
She was there for a while as if waiting for something, we didnt say a
word...finally she looks at me and storms out....lol


Overall, my goal is to put myselft out there first
one that's handled the techiniques are on!

more later

Today I followed my same route:
I have like 30 mins to do my walkaround before class starts.
Get into School -->main lobby-->cafeteria-->library--computer lab--Class

I didnt nocite anyone special to intrigue me and say to myself "I must talk to her".
I go to a predominantly Black school, and me being Hispanic it's tough
makes it a bit challenging in terms of variety.

After class, talked to some classmates and left school.

On my way home driving down the main street, I notice on the second floor
of this building, through the big glass walls people dancing and on the outside
this huge sign Dance School.

So I think to myself "What the hell, nothing to loose " park and go in.
I walk in, music in the background, and see this cutie MILF showing
everyone some steps

The girl at the reception area, a 7 i'd say sees me come right up to her and smiles
enri: So when can I start?
hb7: depends what do you what to learn? smile again
she's goes right into giving me info strictly about the classes etc..boring
enri: well they must pay you good, Im sold, where do I sign
with lots of EC
hb7: she laughs and gives me a form to fill out but neglects to give a pen
enri: you seem pretty distracted, should I may be sit one chair back? big
smirk on my face
hb7: oh god no, im sorry, here
hands me a pen
I start filling out the form and notice her looking at me as I write, I make
some other small talk without looking up, and keep writing
hb7: I think i remeber you from somewhere
enri: "I doubt it"
still not looking up
hb7: im serius, over the weekend, I think I saw you.mm...starts thinking really hard
I look up and catche her looking at me
Enri: where?
Im skeptical since I'd gone clubbing over the weekind fri/Sat on two different
towns

more later..damn cant finish this now..this takes too long to write.. will finish later
I need to sleep!

To continue my last post, that day I ended signing up for Salsa Classes lol.
I didnt try anything with the girl at the desk because I'll seeing her everytime now.

I talked to another girl from my class the next day, not my type at all but just for practice.

Friday I went Clubbing solo after reading some very good posts about it here. I had some alcohol before I left so i wouldnt get ripped and to get in
a more outgoing mood. My mindset was to have fun as prescribed but in the
lookout as well.

I dont remember much. First I hit a bar, was pretty slow, bunch of guys
here and there and all the girls were in mixed groups. I didnt open any sets
so I had a beer and left for the next venue.

Then I hit a lounge right down the street, go in, semi packed by now I'm
buzzed pretty good so I hit the dance floor immediately. I start dancing
by myself all over the place and avoid at all costs to stand anywhere. I
try to dance with a few girls, get turned down, no biggie, keep moving and
dancing.

I open a set of 4 really nice looking girls dancing by themselves. I used the
booty bumping move on one of them, to gauge some interest, and I'm in!
I'm dancing with her and her friends try to take her away from me and instead

I get in the middle and start dancing for all of them, they start laughing and
let me stay. All of them are dancing with me, I'm grind with whoever is the
closest and so forth. I was pretty drunk and having a blast and did not care
at all how I was dancing or with who or who was looking at me.
So it gets pretty intense and all of them want to dance with me, I have 1
in front of me one in the back and 2 on the side touching me and rubbing
against me. i keep it VERY sensual at all times, deep EC, EXTREME kino with
all of theme, this turns them on and at the peak of it all they try to undress me!!! LMAO

So many things were happening and way too fast!! I was drunk so that didnt
help me to see what was going on either, i can barely remember it
I was wearing a stripped button down shirt, a t-shirt under that and a
cardigan on top of it all.
At one point the girls start feeling me up all over under my shirt
One girl lifts up my cardigan over my head but not off and another starts
unbuttoning my shirt, I bugging out becuase of this since it's Never! happend
to me before these girls are dancing, ,laughing, screaming, at what taking
place and im in shock but keep laughing and dancing
Once my shirt is undone I feel a bunch of hand all over me, I am by no means
"ripped" but I have an athletic body type with a 4 pack LOL. My posture
makes it look like I am more built than I really am.

So..all of this is going on, I have no clue what was happening around us
I basically getting rapped in the middle of the dance floor LMAO and it
was getting too wild I guess and a bouncer comes to break it off thinking
I was getting naked by myself I guess or too drunk.
He tries to kick me out of the club, I assure them Im OK the next thing I
know the girls are gone haha

From there it went down hill pretty much
I tried to open more girls but got ****blocked more times that I can
remember, guys will straight up push me aside when I tried to dance with someone WTF!

So shortly after the club closed. I stayed a little afterwards but then jsut
left. I was happy as fvck lol
I danced with 4 girls with normally would conside out of my league and had
a blast! Best night I have had in a whiiiile..

I feel change is coming...cant wait

get a wingman bud useful for clubbing. Distracts the mates, Good for getting into big groups of difficult girls and if they aint biting just dance with him and have a hell of a good time and the girls will always come over and dance with you. That way they can dance with you and their mate won't feel left out and be a pain in the arse.

10-26-08 Saturday night,

I went out by myself again to different town so that I can let myself loose
easier.

I started drinking early at home before I left again. To sum it up I went to
2 venues, the first was a Salsa club, which I thought it'd be easier being
that im hispanic myself but no luck. I Stayed for aroun 30 mins and left.

the next venue, pretty big, lots and lots of people everywhere I think
I may have gone a little too far with the alcohol at home. I was very buzzed
when I got in. i went in pretty confident given what had happened the night before I tried dancing countless times and got shut down every single
time....damn it
That screwed up my head so I left the place. I parked a couple of streets
off the place. I started walking to where i THOUGHT i left my car. I was very
drunk but I still functioned somehow. I was feeling down already beucase
of not having any type of sucess. I passed by the Salon where my ex works
and it starts to get me depressed. I keep walking. I get lost...and I am loosing
my conciousness fast!! I walked for 2 hours trying to find my car..I am
sad and upset and really depressed by now..I almost break down in the
middle of the street out of frustartion. All I wanted to do is go home.

So I walk in circles around the place where I thougt I parked..drunk as
fvck..paranoid that I wont be able to go home. So finally i give up and
walk one more time on the street I left my car...about 5 blocks off where
I had been looking I find it!!! Man it was the happiest feeling to see my car
I go runing and kiss it!! LMAO No joke.. Iw as that bad.

So i get in and break down because by now I'm missing my ex and and get
really depressed. I drove home (I know this is bad).

Better days are ahead..

Corey said:

get a wingman bud useful for clubbing distracts the mates useful to break into big groups of girlss

Click to expand...

I know. I dont know anyone yet to become my wingman.

I lost all my guy "friends" because of my break up..they chose her over me.

Thats OK though, I'm working on it.

go to the wingman section of the forum.
try not to get a wingman from school, dont mix personal life with school.
keep friends and school separate , trust me. YOu will enjoy it without worrying too much.Sometimes friends from school can backfire on you if they also are attracted to your girl.

Mad Props doing your journal you look back how you learned out of your own experience, this will change you...it has for me!

Oneitis posts here are awesome look them up... just start flirting and hitting on the girls. this will keep your head busy and avoiding relapse.

AVOID RELAPSE !!!!!

If any look up matt hutson get your ex back. my friend showed it to me when he got it and dude its based on female psycology and it works!
the fact of the matter and the basis of this program is to move on then after that she will crawl back cause they always do... either you move on or she will see you just as she left you....

You on the right path bro!

wow it's been a few weeks, time fliees

Following Broken Dream's advice i started PMing every one around my area,
a few replied but when it came down to businiess to meet up or set something up 99% of DJs flaked? I was loosing hope.

I contacted a DJ from here (DJkid) and we met up and he introduced me to
2 of his wings, very cool, fun guys all around. So I've been hanging out with
them every chance I get. These guys are ruthless at approaching haha
which is the exact exposure i needed. I have not had any success -yet-
but I love watching these guys on the field, approaching and number closing
left and right.
My anxiety is still strong but even so I been throwing myself out there with
them even if I suck lol But i can feeling coming,it's only a matter of time.

i've been diagnosing myself a lot lately, I'm pretty ok with myself physically
but not so much psychologically. I have self diagnosed myself with some
Social Anxiety symptoms, man did I screw my head bad this past 3 years haha
so I trying to get that worked out and become the loud outgoing phucker i
once was once again which got me the girls in the first place

So i feel there is a lot to do and it will take time and im ok with it as long as
i dont loose focus

I just wish i had more time to put in into this project but school and work have taken over my life which is ok since they're positive things

so more updates later
cheers

Some crazy Thanksgiving weekend ia had lol

Wenesday Night

Since I had no work for the rest of the week and school being lite i was pumped
about the weekend.
After work I head home and take a sweet nap, get in the mood by blasting
some club music, some bodka and cola and some fresh clothes.
I call up one of my last good old AFC friend J to come out with me. He's no
Wingman but i didnt feel like going alone. We met up at a local bar, another two
old friends were already there, we talk for a bit and I notice the bartender, a tall
brazilian HB an 7 in my scale is flirting with one friend M I met there. I knew exactly
how that was going to end. She would show him interest and he would stay
there long enough to screw up his chances. It happens all the time in that
circle of friends, reminded me why I stopped hanging out with them. They are
the type of people that have good looks in their favor, ie above exaple, but
know very little about attraction and give all the power away when they see the
smallest interest towards them. Anyway..

So I sense those two were going to stay there all night. I tell my buddy J to hit
a club, he agrees and we're off.
We go to this popular latin club, it's packed and expensive to get it.
On our wawy, I try to school him on some wingmanship. He doesnt
seem to take it seriously. I tried. So we get there and reluctantly I
pay the cover charge but my mind is swayed by the hot female exmaples that
were in there. We get in, order a few drinks. While waiting for my drink I open this
two set right next to me, they are waiting for drinks too.

-Me: Hey, you guys having fun?- Just as I finished my question their drinks arrive
and they leave me there talking to myself..LOL I laugh it off and think to myself
The shields are on full force tonight.
I scout the place a couple of times, my "wwing" on my tail always try to squeze
into daning multiple times. No luck. Turned down every time.
By this time my wing gives up and goes get a drink and stand in a corner. Wallflower!
So I keep on by myself. I do manage to open this chuby girl. All in the name of
social proof I think while we dance. I say "thanks" and leave. By know my friend
is bored and wants to leave. I cant object since he was driving.
Not so eventful but way better than just staying home

Thursday Night -Thanksgiving Night (ONS ALERT!)

So after spending part of the night with the Fam and having dinner and some whine i head out.

The night beggins as it did Wednesday night. I met the same people at the same place
around the same time. Now I see the girl isnt even talking to my friend M. I cant
help but smile to myself and imagine exactly what happened.
We leave to the next venue a couple of streets down.
There were 4 of us. We set stage close to the bar and the lounge gets increasingly
packed within the hour.
I break out of my friends to scout the place. I notice various, 4, 3, 2 sets scattered
along the floor.
I report back to my friends and tell them the news. They look at me as If I had
two heads when I suggest approacing. AGAIN these are the type of people who
wait to get approached and what bugs me that it does happen as you'll see
shortly. So we're all just drinking and dancing close to the bar. My friend M was
high on alcohol so he gets at bit ballsy and ventures further by himself close
to a 4 set dancing by himself. The 3 set gets broken up by random guys and
there's one girl left. I'm laying back on the bar counter studying all the moves.
She drags him to dance with her. An easy 7+. I think to myself 'lucky bastard'.
So after that we're all back together and I decide to make a move.

I move into the dance floor, open a two set. Get initial interest and even start
dancing with one of the girls but get eventually ****blocked by her girlfriend.
Everytime where I found myself in the situation when I knew I couldn't hold a
set for long I motioned to any of my friends to come and help but they just
looked at me struggle and get rejected and ignored me. WTF!. Some friends eh?

So i get fed up of them and go on my own. I was drunk enough to not give
a sh!t and open a 4 set immediately, All of them in the 8 mark. Well at least I try. They're all
on a table clearly waiting to be apporaced by their constant onlooking and open
body language.
I walk up the HB closest to me.

me: Hi, how you doing.
HB8: great -fake smile- looks away
me: come! lets have some fun! I offer my hand.
HB8: -smiles, looks at her friends- not right now

I got no IOIs whatsoever so I exit

My mystake was to maybe I didnt acknoledge the whole set just my target.o well

So I go sit for a few in a booth, let the alcohol sink in
While sitting I get some random IOI from different girls in the floor I try to pursue it
with some deep EC. All flake out.

I see my friend M dancing with the same girl again without any effort on his part.
I smile again knowing how it'll end. I mentioned i was with 4
buddies. Well one of them is J toal AFC who will never approach. And the other one
was along the same lines. I didnt know him well. Both on their own planted by the bar.
Seing this encourages me.
I spot an 5-6 being abandoned by her HB8 friend and some guy. She goes to sit for a sec
and comes back almost immediately. I was already in the move.
As I walk over her,more like dance my way thre, he seems lost. I approach her head on
and start dancing, she immediately lights up and opens up.
We grind for a while and I pull some Kino session i've never had the balls to do
before. I start getting really close. Breathing heavy down her neck and strong EC.
I grab her gently by her neck, waist and work my way down and her waist.
No word has been said. I keep strong EC. She looks at my lips and it hits me!
I go in straight for the kiss. No resistance at all. We make out for a freaking while
still dancing. By now I'm pretty drunk. By now I realize she's not the 6 i thought lol
more like a solid 5. Nothing special goin on but nothing horrendous either.
We keep dancing I try to be bold and reach for the gold. I gropped her all over LOL
She doesnt let me. Fine. More making out.
Im getting tired, and im sort of afraid this will turn into those other
ocassions where i had success in a club with make out sessions but never went
anywhere. So I decide I'd be more assertive this time.

me: to her ear -let's get out of here-
by know i had built some major rapport physically only
HB5: -IDK im waiting for my friend-

I drop it and dance and make out some more.
By now it hits me all my friends must be watching me.
I get selfconcious for a sec thiking how they'll rip
on me for not closing on a 10. Yea they're like that too.

So again i tell her

me: let's go somewhwere else, im leaving now
her: -OK- nods head

my heart drops...I've never had a girl come with me ever!
my mind starts racing, i dont even want think what my other body
parts were doing. We walk out. Almost close time. As we're out
we start walking towards my car and I realize I left my coat inside.
I tell her I got to get my coat. I go in get my coat and see my friends
had left. Perfect.
As I come out I see her talking to some other guy. I was like FVCK!
But instintively I just walk past them and just as im walking next to
her i say:

me: -let's go-
her: -sorry gotta go- to the other guy and rushes to my side
I left like the fscking MAN. It was so great I just smiled.

My car was just around the block. We get in and get into some small talk.

me: what's your name
her: -blah-
I forgot what it was lol
me: im enri
me: you live around here
her: yeah right by Walgreen
me: great, that means we get to goto your place
her: idk, what about yours?
me: cant i live next town over
her: i dont think I can, my roomates..
me: alrite, we could stay in the car
it was freezing outside and my AC barely works lol
her: hmmm..she's quiet for a bit -alrite i guess we can go-
Im flipping out but by now I had accepted it, sucess, so i kept cool.

we drive to her place, we talked about some BS i cant remember. I was drunk.
She happened to live in the same neighborhood as my Oneitis. I smiled. Of
all the places lol. So we go in I see a couple of kids passed out in the
living room we go straight to her room. She asks me to keep quiet not to
wake up anyone. of course lol. It had to be around 3 am.
we go in and naturally get straight to bussiness. Make out, undress, the works!
i used about 3 condoms and things got pretty stale around 5:30. I said I had to
go but she told me I could spend the night and she wasnt done lol.
I pretty much was so I told her I worked the next morning all while getting
dressed and teasing her body all over. I was in complete control. It was eyeopening!

Thats the great thing about me. ONCE i know I have no resistance from a girl and
regection is impossible I'm a natural DJ. I did everything perfect while I was with
her, kept it mysterious, one step front, two back, teased, made fun, and over all
kept it amplifying. I left on her highest point. She even offered me a shirt and tie
to wear to "work" if i didnt leave LMAO.

So i get dressed and left. She walked me to her door and tried to play the i've never
done this, it was a mistake card and tried to pull off the hard to get. All too late.
Right before I say goodbye:

me: oh i never got your number
her: oh i dont even know you
me: oh I think you do
her: no i dont think it's a good ide after what happened
me: smirk..rise her chin with my finger and kiss
me: -it's going to be ok- (thanks DD) lmao
her: picks up my phone and dials her number (i laugh my ass off inside haha)

So i leave, I drive down my Oneitis house, two streets down and cant help but to laugh histerically
at how stupid of me for being downw for this girl, i felt great nothing could knock me off

I get home and go to sleep with the biggest smile in my face...



Three days later..i have the biggest body sore ever. I hadnt had any in about 3 months since my
break up and apparently i've been out of shape. I spent two days in bed trying to recover..oh the
beautiful pain LOL

I talked to her today, well texted. I'll going to do a "surprise" visit sometime this week. Will report back.

Fiday Night (Black friday)
I meet up with a wing from SS.net
we hit the mall to try to practice some day game
couldnt have picked a worse day lol everybody is running around shopping, also we both arent
that great on day game either so after strolling the mall for a few without any success we leave
we hit a pub right next to the mall and as we suspected it was dead. we drink a beer and call it an afternoon.
We set up to ge sarging later that night.
night comes, we set up the location, i get in the mood (ie drink, dance at home and dress up) and leave to
meet them. My car breaks down in the worse part of town and I had to walk my ass home in the freezing cold at
midnight, apparently i had to much alcohol too so that made it worse. definately worse night of the week.
it eneded there. My wing then reports next day it went pretty well for them. Damn it. o well. Next time!

Saturday Night
I had no car and it rained from dawn to sunset so I just chilled home.

Sunday Night
I couldnt even move. Recovering from Thursday night. LOL I still cant believe it happened but I have all the sore muscles to prove it.

I'm coming alone fine.. I think.

opinions?

everyone's done at least one or two 5's in their seduction careers, lol. I hear some people target them as slumpbusters.


Showing up unannounced to surprise a ONS seems a weird but I don't know the full details of your relationship. Good stuff mayne