Cute chick. Job. Need game plan. Help?

So here's the deal:

I work with this cute chick. Interested in her. I know the rule, "don't dip your pen in the company ink". However, this is my summer, seasonal job. We do painting and etc. and this is my last year returning. The job ends when back to school begins.

She's not bad looking. She's looks like a 7-8. However with the right clothes and a little makeup she can be a 9.5 easy. She's got a great body but she's a bit of a book worm. (yes I know that is )

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I need some sort of a game plan. I need to play it safe for a month and a bit, then the gloves come off since I don't need the job anymore. I will have more than enough money to pay my tuition loan from college, and for next semester.

I'm not bad looking. I'm a 6+... I guess. I don't know.... I guess that's something I can use. I can be funny. I'm not that good at telling stories, so I try to avoid that in conversation with anyone except my closest friends. I am mostly a deep thinker, I invent/make **** in my spare time whenever I need something.

I am not introverted though. I just don't socialize all that much, and rarely feel the need to do so.



Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

If you guys need anything clarified, let me know. I haven't included much to keep it short.



One thing I really need to work on is better communication... on a personal level. I know I'm a bit cold & dry in that area. Works well for business though.

First off you need to believe in yourself. Just in your post there you clearly descried yourself as being lower than the female, a 6 compared to a 7 or 8. what you think you rate doesn't matter at all, only what she thinks of you. and she will think of you as you present yourself. if you present yourself and believe yourself to be a 10, she will believe it too. of course it's not quite that easy. it involves alot of personal growth on your end. Have some ego. Socializing is a DJ's best friend, and you should try to do it more often, even if you don't feel the need to. It's hard to give you much advice because much of what you do has to be done on the fly. You should be a bit of a mystery. if she asks you about yourself, don't give her a straight answer. don't tell her the whole story. Women hate not knowing everything about you, and they'll do practically whatever to figure out what makes you tick.

Were only as good looking as another person percieves us, so nobody can solidly say another person is an 8. Im sure with the right clothes and enough effort the avg person can be a 9 or 10 to plenty of people they rate a 9 or 10.

I take it your friendly with one another so why not ask her out for a meal so its clearly a date but say 'were going as friends though, ok?' if she complains about the friends thing great, you can act cool and say slow down and so on

If she doesnt im sure she will still be wondering, act like its a date but say its not, then escalate with kino and the things you say if you notice signs from bodylanguage or the stuff she says.

Basicly the purpose of that is to make her think she hasnt qualified yet and that she has to impress you to qualify, your the prize right Either way it will make her think about you even more which is always a good thing.

Good luck and remember 'He who hesitates, MASTURBATES!'

remember to post again saying how it worked out

Infamous_Wolf said:

you clearly descried yourself as being lower than the female

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In terms of looks, yes. I shouldn't have mentioned it since its not important. I don't really care much. My bad. I need to work on communication.

only what she thinks of you. and she will think of you as you present yourself. if you present yourself and believe yourself to be a 10, she will believe it too.

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I don't really present myself as anything. I don't have confidence, but I don't lack it. I just don't show it. This is what I need help with. I have no reason to be confident, but I don't have a reason not to be.

Have some ego.

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I got that under control awhile ago. It got out of hand, I was a major ******* for a while.

Socializing is a DJ's best friend, and you should try to do it more often, even if you don't feel the need to. It's hard to give you much advice because much of what you do has to be done on the fly.

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I've been trying to socialize more. It depends on the environment also. Any advice is appreciated.

if she asks you about yourself, don't give her a straight answer. don't tell her the whole story.

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Done. This is something I can apply straight away. Thanks mate.

Women hate not knowing everything about you, and they'll do practically whatever to figure out what makes you tick.

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I barely know me.

Alle_Gory said:

In terms of looks, yes. I shouldn't have mentioned it since its not important. I don't really care much. My bad. I need to work on communication.

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But you did mention it. and you mentioned it again right there. You seem to be lacking some self-esteem when it comes to your looks. You may not admit it to yourself, you may not even actively think about it, but I bet when you see a hot woman, you automatically think you have no chance based on your looks alone. I looked like the nerdiest son of a b!tch just a couple years ago but I've turned myself around. I decided to get myself some style, figure out to dress good. Get a couple nice outfits, something you can feel good going about the town in. But I still felt under-qualified to get myself a hot lady, so I just recently started a consistent workout routine. And it's not even anything that difficult. I got out and run around my complex for half an hour and then do some muscle work thereafter. It's only been a month but I already feel 2 times better than I used to.

Alle_Gory said:

I don't really present myself as anything. I don't have confidence, but I don't lack it. I just don't show it. This is what I need help with. I have no reason to be confident, but I don't have a reason not to be.

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I know it seems stupid at first right? But if you want people to respond to you, to notice your presence, you need to establish confidence in yourself, and then exude that confidence in all of your interactions. Becoming confident also comes with the territory of simply improving yourself. Like I was saying before, getting nice clothes, working out, just generally taking good care of your self gives an enormous confidence boost. You know, this sounds like the most ridiculous thing ever, but I somehow got myself in the habit of looking in the mirror, in just any mirror, and thinking "I am a sexy beast. I look f*ckin good." or something similar. It's become second nature now and it actually did boost my confidence. A Man named Pook once said "As you think, so shall you become" That's not a joke bro. If you think you're mediocre, just an average guy, you will *always* be just a regular joe. But if you keep telling your self you are a strong confident man, then continue that thought in to the real world with you, amazing things will happen.

Alle_Gory said:

I got that under control awhile ago. It got out of hand, I was a major ******* for a while.

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An ego is a good thing and a bad thing. You should recognize that you are a man, and be confident and self-assured that you are. You don't need to be a **** about it tho. You are never perfect, you can always improve. But that doesn't mean you can think you're awesome right now. You just get more awesome as you go.

Alle_Gory said:

I've been trying to socialize more. It depends on the environment also. Any advice is appreciated.

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Go out with a bunch of friends. Hell you don't even need them, go make some new friends. It only gets easier if you do it more. Being in highschool can be severely limiting in terms of meeting new friends, I understand. But just wait a few more years, once you've graduated, and especially after you turn 21, practically every opprotunity for meeting new people and women becomes open to you. you just gotta go out there and grab 'em. just go up and start conversations with people that catch your eye. I know you're going to be nervous and all that jazz, but it's totally cool dude. You just need to keep that nervousness inside. It takes some will power, your inner wussy will be screaming at you the whole time, but you gotta fight past it. Soon, the apprehension disappears. Soon, you feel more free than you ever have before.

Alle_Gory said:

I barely know me.

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Well than that is your most pressing problem at the moment. How do you think you can find w woman you like and is compatible with you if you don't even know who you are? But that's ok too, you're young. This is the point in your life where you should start *MAKING* you. Develop your intellect, pick up hobbies and activities to keep yourself busy. You need to look for something you really like doing and pursue it. And it can't be women. the woman never ever comes before you.

Keep in mind, that the strict advice you read on this website is merely here to get you started on your own personal growth and evolution. no rule is completely infallible. Think of these guidelines as the bumpers on a bowling lane, they keep you inside the lines until you can do it yourself. It does not come fast, and it does not come easy. but if you dedicate, this day forward, to improving yourself and growing in to man, then a man you shall become.

Infamous_Wolf said:

I bet when you see a hot woman, you automatically think you have no chance based on your looks alone.

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Yup. Most cases.

I decided to get myself some style, figure out to dress good. Get a couple nice outfits, something you can feel good going about the town in.

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I've gotten back into this also. This situation was a wakeup call. I let myself slide too much. Its unnaceptable. I'm on a pretty harsh diet to lose weight, just started gym sessions. I feel like ****, but its worth it.

How do you think you can find w woman you like and is compatible with you if you don't even know who you are? But that's ok too, you're young. This is the point in your life where you should start *MAKING* you.

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I know what I like and how I like it. That's it. Everything else changes over time.

Keep in mind, that the strict advice you read on this website is merely here to get you started on your own personal growth and evolution. no rule is completely infallible.

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I'm just here for ideas. It's all up to me to put it into action.


Thanks for your advice. I will post an update when I make it happen.

I am a ****ing idiot.

So I talked to one of the employees who frequently chats to her. He's a guy, gay. But anyways I am afraid that my simple question about whether she is single or not, may start up a **** storm of real & fantasy drama. I hate drama.


Worst case scenario: If she knows I am interested, what can this result in?

I usually like to keep my mouth shut until I make a move. But curiosity got the better of me.

Be careful about dating in your workplace. My ex still works at the place I work at and there is a significant bit of awardness in the air when we are in the same room. And I feel too self-conscious for my liking.

I've done the work thing about a million times and I've been having more success recently due to my experiences with it and how to make it work. The number one thing I've come to accept is that when you like a girl you work with, it is not wise to overtly ask her out. Maybe go out for drinks afterwards or go on break or whatever and use your charm there, but a direct date offer has consistently bombed for me.

I usually start off with mild rapport and joking. Then escalate a bit into playful flirting and teasing. Then I ask the girl if she wants to go on break with me somewhere, etc. Then if I'm feeling good vibes, I mention something outside of work and see if she wants to join me.

The one thing you have to do in this situation is take it slowly, and don't force anything, and always be cool and calm with whatever happens.

It's not exact and I'm still working on this system but this is usually the route I take to hooking up with work girls. And also, let them see you flirt with other girls there too.

So I went for it and asked her out. We're going to a pool hall... sometime. She has to check her schedule and let me know. I know ahead of time she's been all over the place. We're going as friends though.


I'm relieved about this. I just learned about her complicated situation. She's been seeing her lover-boy from childhood on and off for a few years, open relationship since he lives in the States. We're in Canada. He proposed to her to get married in 9 years. They have a 'pact' or something. He just came into the picture this week, for a couple of weeks. I don't like this chick so much now.

I feel very dissapointed. First I thought she was interested, secondly I thought she was a nice girl. Damn.


I'll see how this goes. Looking through her Facebook profile she's got some cute friends. Might be worth some effort to become friends.

If anything its another chance to practice my social skills and talking to women. I'm still rough in those areas.