scarface316
Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 25, 2008
- Messages
- 28
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Alright, I know this is my first post and it seems really "sketchy" but I've been roaming and reading through this website for years.. I took the information and understood the concepts everyone has on life, girls and being a man. I improved myself by being more independent than before.. But the main thing holding me back is executing the deed or moves to come from friend or just met you to being valued as a lover. Hopefully you guys can give me some good advice or suggestions.
Here's the thing about me, I've always been a big kid, not in height but in weight. After years of rejection and realizing how fat I was and how you cannot get laid by hot 8-10's by being fat, and after watching 300, I was pretty inspired to finally lose weight. And I did. I peaked at 315 pounds at around the time 300 came out, I decided to work out and dropped to 275 pounds without really focusing on it (work/school). And then in October, I set a goal to fit in a size 34 waist pants by New Years. I saw myself transform, I went from a size 42 waist to a 34 by Christmas Eve. I went from a XXL t-shirt to a L or even some medium sizes. I've noticed people and especially girls complimenting me on how good I look, which surprises me because I still feel "fat".
I lost all this weight so fast my mind has never been used to all this and I don't wanna use it as a crutch but I can see I am stuck with old habits from when I was bigger. Reflecting on my life, I've been conditioned the last few years to be the "nice-guy", (fueled by family values and because I grew up with a mom and aunts, no true "man" figure in my life), being the nice guy is all a fat man can do with hot girls. And after losing the weight, I'm in a whole different situation than I've ever experienced before. (I haven't been under 200 pounds since I was maybe 10-12 years old, I'm 5'11).
My situation is with this girl I've known for maybe 2 years, she is hot and fun to be with. And she saw me at a party for the first time in months and was shocked. She was all like, "ooooOohhh! Sexy!" when we talked about my weight loss. So for the past month or so, we've been talking to each other.
Anyways, she is and always have been doing things for me, giving me or making things for ME (even when I was with my ex last year, who is her good friend). All my friends say she's diggin me and always wanting to hang out with me. But I've hung out with her over 5-6 times and my perception of her is still the same as when I was a fatty. Therefore, I am HESITATING in situations I feel, after it passes by, that I should've done the move. I calibrate my feelings with the situations and understand it after its too late or too awkward to do it. And the thing I noticed is that these moments are QUICK, passes by in mere seconds. This is where I need help at. I want to learn how to create situations where I am in control and I know for sure I am going to make the move without making a fool out of myself.
I KNOW its dragging because I haven't made a MOVE on her! And I know I'm f***ing up by not doing anything. The real problem for me is knowing the right moment to go in for the kiss. And how can I find out if its too late to even bother because I feel like I'm doomed to be in the "friends zone".
What can I do? As well as what things should I and shouldn't I do?
Here's the thing about me, I've always been a big kid, not in height but in weight. After years of rejection and realizing how fat I was and how you cannot get laid by hot 8-10's by being fat, and after watching 300, I was pretty inspired to finally lose weight. And I did. I peaked at 315 pounds at around the time 300 came out, I decided to work out and dropped to 275 pounds without really focusing on it (work/school). And then in October, I set a goal to fit in a size 34 waist pants by New Years. I saw myself transform, I went from a size 42 waist to a 34 by Christmas Eve. I went from a XXL t-shirt to a L or even some medium sizes. I've noticed people and especially girls complimenting me on how good I look, which surprises me because I still feel "fat".
I lost all this weight so fast my mind has never been used to all this and I don't wanna use it as a crutch but I can see I am stuck with old habits from when I was bigger. Reflecting on my life, I've been conditioned the last few years to be the "nice-guy", (fueled by family values and because I grew up with a mom and aunts, no true "man" figure in my life), being the nice guy is all a fat man can do with hot girls. And after losing the weight, I'm in a whole different situation than I've ever experienced before. (I haven't been under 200 pounds since I was maybe 10-12 years old, I'm 5'11).
My situation is with this girl I've known for maybe 2 years, she is hot and fun to be with. And she saw me at a party for the first time in months and was shocked. She was all like, "ooooOohhh! Sexy!" when we talked about my weight loss. So for the past month or so, we've been talking to each other.
Anyways, she is and always have been doing things for me, giving me or making things for ME (even when I was with my ex last year, who is her good friend). All my friends say she's diggin me and always wanting to hang out with me. But I've hung out with her over 5-6 times and my perception of her is still the same as when I was a fatty. Therefore, I am HESITATING in situations I feel, after it passes by, that I should've done the move. I calibrate my feelings with the situations and understand it after its too late or too awkward to do it. And the thing I noticed is that these moments are QUICK, passes by in mere seconds. This is where I need help at. I want to learn how to create situations where I am in control and I know for sure I am going to make the move without making a fool out of myself.
I KNOW its dragging because I haven't made a MOVE on her! And I know I'm f***ing up by not doing anything. The real problem for me is knowing the right moment to go in for the kiss. And how can I find out if its too late to even bother because I feel like I'm doomed to be in the "friends zone".
What can I do? As well as what things should I and shouldn't I do?