Quiet Man

Mr.Smith

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I'm not sure if this is the right forum for this but I am going to give it a shot. I need help here because my being a quiet man has deterred my chances with many women. In the past year I've experimented with various herbal products to help with increasing my energy levels and thus gaining a better social life by talking more. Have noticed that most products caused side effects from increased prostate size to confusion. I'm in my late 40's.

My discovery has found that the reason why I am so quiet is because of having very low energy levels during the day. Do get plenty of rest at night but tend to fall asleep at times during the day. Yes there is prescription medication for this type of problem but I'm trying to avoid taking medication if there is something natural instead. Too many women have commented that if I was not so quiet they would go out with me.

Could use some advice here from men that have experienced this or know of some good tips on combating this problem.
 

MR_PERFECT

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In regard to your energy level, you have to make sure you eat enough during the day, and make sure you're eating enough carbs. You may also want to give working out a try.

Now, with the voice, I notice that I'll stumble over my words and stutter if I'm tired. If I'm going on a date and I feel that way, I'll drink an energy drink or have a few chewable caffeine pills. Another thing, too, is that you have to be aware of how much you are projecting your voice during conversation. I had a relative recently notice the voice change when I'm speaking with a waitress or anyone else. I try not to be lazy now. My biggest problem is that it’s not yet natural to me but I’m getting there.
 

Interceptor

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Most people whom are 'too quiet' are so because of being ashamed or embarassed of revealing themselves , or used to being 'too into their head'.
Some people also may just be very boring, and have nothing to talk about or say...

Youre saying you are quiet because you have low energy levels?

You mean you cant even think or talk because you are so tired?


Have you seen a doctor?
 

Mr.Smith

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Interceptor said:
Most people whom are 'too quiet' are so because of being ashamed or embarassed of revealing themselves , or used to being 'too into their head'.
Some people also may just be very boring, and have nothing to talk about or say...

Youre saying you are quiet because you have low energy levels?

You mean you cant even think or talk because you are so tired?


Have you seen a doctor?
Lol. No I am able to speak, just so tired that I am unable to have a decent conversation with a woman. Just small talk. Could be some boredom in there as well since nothing comes up to say meaningful and exciting to talk about. I'm not ashamed or embarassed to talk with them that I do know. Not into my head either. On rare occasions when I do have a good amount of energy I have no problem conversing with women and keeping the rapport exciting and fun.
 

Luthor Rex

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Mr.Smith said:
My discovery has found that the reason why I am so quiet is because of having very low energy levels during the day. Do get plenty of rest at night but tend to fall asleep at times during the day.
Falling asleep during the day is NOT NORMAL. Go see a doctor, sleep problems can really wreck you. If you are getting 8+ hours of sleep and are still tired enough for a nap something is probably wrong.

Mr.Smith said:
Too many women have commented that if I was not so quiet they would go out with me.
That's just an excuse they are making.
 

thedeparted

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I recommend a NaturoPath doctor. They will take a nutritional and wholistic approach, instead of just prescribing some meds. But I don't think you can solve health issues on soSuave
 

KarmaSutra

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Your shyness is merely asymptomatic to the core issue. Are you afraid of what a woman will say before she even says it? Having been an extrovert only recently, I can tell you that the worst thing you can do is try to foresee the future. Especially when it comes to women.

There is no quick fix. It will take commitment to reinvention, a renewed faith in yourself and who you picture yourself at your best, and, most importantly, you'll need to come out of your cocoon and metamorphosize your true being.

The fact that you're here is a great start.

What is it you want with a woman?

What is it you want from yourself which a woman can bring to your life?

What can you bring to a woman?
KARMIC LAW #21 - You have to be happy single before you can be part of a happy couple.
Read this LAW until it becomes mantra.

We need to know your success and your failures with women. It's crucial because it will allow us to critique those issues which we men have already faced and conquered.

Remember Brother, you're not alone anymore.
 

Señor Fingers

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It sounds like your energy is very YIN right now.

Yin is the silence, introspection and stasis you are experiencing. What you need is a shot in the arm of concentrated YANG (heat, fire, activity).

First thing you should tackle is your diet.

YANG Foods

• Beef
• Chicken
• Fresh Ginger
• Garlic
• Chili/Cayenne Peppers
• Chives
• Cassavas
• Glutinous Rice
• Eggs
• Mustard Greens
• Leeks
• Onions
• Kale
• Cherry
• Wine

I can't recommend the fresh ginger enough. It really activates your whole body. When I am feeling lethargic, I take a piece of it and run through a fine cheese grater. I then take the pulp and squeeze the juice out of it. Sometimes I drink like a shot or add to apple juice. It's awesome. (Don't overdoit though, you WILL get the runs! :p )

Also the way you cook your food affects its energy. Stir-frying, roasting and baking all raise the yang levels of your food. (Eat steamed, boiled or poached food sparingly)

YIN Foods (try to avoid)

• Milk
• Alcohol
• Honey
• White Sugar
• Oil
• Tropical Fruits
• Spices
• Stimulants
• Most drugs (such as aspirin)
• Refined foods
• Tobacco <= REALLY bad!
• Most food additives of a chemical nature.

BALANCED FOODS (eat as much as you want)

• Seeds & Nuts <= GREAT for testosterone levels
• Vegetables
• Cereal grains
• Beans
• Sea vegetables
• Temperate fruits (such as apples and pears)

The next thing you need is physical exercise. This is VERY IMPORTANT! It doesnt matter what you do.. run, swim, bike, climb, dance.. whatever it takes to get your heart rate really going for at least 40 minutes a day - you must ignite that inner fire and SWEAT. Do not underestimate your body's need for exertion. Move it or lose it!!

This is not about getting six-pack abs, its about altering your brain chemistry. Exercise not only releases testosterone along with those feel-good endorphins, it also increases your serotonin levels, allowing you to enjoy some DEEP, rejuvenating sleep.

With diet, exercise and rest building up your personal store of energy, you will soon find yourself restless and very motivated to be social. You will wonder how you spent so much time alone and in your own head.

Once you've reached this level, THEN we can talk more about social dynamics, the art of conversation and all that other fun stuff. Right now you just need to get off your ass more than anything.

Seriously.. why are you sitting there reading this crap??

Life is passing you by... GET UP!!!!!!
 

guru1000

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Mr.Smith said:
My discovery has found that the reason why I am so quiet is because of having very low energy levels during the day. Do get plenty of rest at night but tend to fall asleep at times during the day.
Sounds like a hypogonadal problem.

Increase your T levels. No recommendations or medications will help if sourced to low testosterone production.
 

Mr.Smith

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Señor Fingers said:
It sounds like your energy is very YIN right now.

Yin is the silence, introspection and stasis you are experiencing. What you need is a shot in the arm of concentrated YANG (heat, fire, activity).

First thing you should tackle is your diet.

YANG Foods

• Beef
• Chicken
• Fresh Ginger
• Garlic
• Chili/Cayenne Peppers
• Chives
• Cassavas
• Glutinous Rice
• Eggs
• Mustard Greens
• Leeks
• Onions
• Kale
• Cherry
• Wine

I can't recommend the fresh ginger enough. It really activates your whole body. When I am feeling lethargic, I take a piece of it and run through a fine cheese grater. I then take the pulp and squeeze the juice out of it. Sometimes I drink like a shot or add to apple juice. It's awesome. (Don't overdoit though, you WILL get the runs! :p )

Also the way you cook your food affects its energy. Stir-frying, roasting and baking all raise the yang levels of your food. (Eat steamed, boiled or poached food sparingly)

YIN Foods (try to avoid)

• Milk
• Alcohol
• Honey
• White Sugar
• Oil
• Tropical Fruits
• Spices
• Stimulants
• Most drugs (such as aspirin)
• Refined foods
• Tobacco <= REALLY bad!
• Most food additives of a chemical nature.

BALANCED FOODS (eat as much as you want)

• Seeds & Nuts <= GREAT for testosterone levels
• Vegetables
• Cereal grains
• Beans
• Sea vegetables
• Temperate fruits (such as apples and pears)

The next thing you need is physical exercise. This is VERY IMPORTANT! It doesnt matter what you do.. run, swim, bike, climb, dance.. whatever it takes to get your heart rate really going for at least 40 minutes a day - you must ignite that inner fire and SWEAT. Do not underestimate your body's need for exertion. Move it or lose it!!

This is not about getting six-pack abs, its about altering your brain chemistry. Exercise not only releases testosterone along with those feel-good endorphins, it also increases your serotonin levels, allowing you to enjoy some DEEP, rejuvenating sleep.

With diet, exercise and rest building up your personal store of energy, you will soon find yourself restless and very motivated to be social. You will wonder how you spent so much time alone and in your own head.

Once you've reached this level, THEN we can talk more about social dynamics, the art of conversation and all that other fun stuff. Right now you just need to get off your ass more than anything.

Seriously.. why are you sitting there reading this crap??

Life is passing you by... GET UP!!!!!!
Thanks Senor Fingers. I just came back from a walk with my dog, was not 40 minutes worth but at least I got off my ass. Came back and my neighbor was out on her patio. Recently a piece of mail of her's was put in my box by mistake. I went over to her place to deliver it but her mother was staying with her at the time and took it. When I came up the stairs tonight and saw her I came over said hi. Hey it's a start. She thanked me for bringing the mail over and told me it was a check. I then told her I wanted half of it. She just laughed. Told me it was $46.00. (This is when I should have had a backup phrase like I expect you to take me out, I'm free tonight) Did not say anything after that until she said "if you recieve anymore check's bring it over". A year ago I would have said ok but I said to her instead that I will be keeping the next check and buy that big screen tv I always wanted, whatever was left I would give back to her(now that I think about it after the fact I should have just said whatever is left over you have to take me out). She smokes and I do not date smokers so this is good practise. I know I AFC'd but practise is what it takes. Senor I will take your advice on the food, exercise and rest information. Will be joining the gym next month but in the meatime will be exercising by walking everyday with my dog for at least 30 to 40 minutes. Thanks.
 
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