the dreaded roommate

Alright I know this has probably been discussed before but here's my situation. I moved in with her 2 months ago. She is 32, I am 31, she a self-employed photographer who works from home.

She knows I'm relatively knew to Halifax and is under the impression that I broke up with my g/f when I moved in with her. She knows I've also spent a considerable number of evenings not home.

We have similiar interests/tastes. I would rate her 6.5-7. I'm not overly attracted to her. I only want her because I'm not suppose to have her. Thats who I am, I always go after the wrong targets. I've come to accept that I like the challenge and thrill of victory more so than the actual prize.

On the weekend, I usually cook myself breakfast. Two weekends ago, I cooked a big meal, she woke up late Saturday afternoon, smelt it but I told her I ended up eating it all. This weekend I cooked breakfast again, made sure there was enough for her. She was estatic, like a kid on xmas morning.

Last night, she cooked me a nice supper. I was quite impressed as for the past 2 weeks while I've been slaving over the stove cooking for myself every night, she orders take out. Aah I miss the perks of being self-employed.

So I haven't really done much to create attraction. However I don't think I'm quite in the friends zone yet. Although I know I'm sorta there by default being a roommate.

So how do I create attraction when she sees my every move? We've gone out a couple of times to the bars with her friends and stuff. I don't really have an interest in using her to lay her friends.

The problem why I haven't made a move when we've been out drinking is that I always end up getting loaded. So other than, stop being the drunker one, what else can I do?

Dude,


Are you SURE you want to escalate this situation? Why on earth would you want to put any effort into trying to get with a woman you're only BARELY attracted to?

You seem to understand yourself and your motivations pretty well, so I'll refrain from offering you an unqualified AND unsolicited lecture. LOL

But I will ask you a few questions:

Wouldn't trying to fukk this girl do more harm to your current living situation than help it?

Or do you even really give a damn???? lol


And if the answer to both of these questions is NO. then I say escalate with eye contact & kino one nite while watching TV and take it from there.

I just hope your ass don't wind up living out on the street because of the DRAMA that's sure to follow after it's over...lol



March on.

Just because you're not supposed to? That's the lamest reason I've heard in here for trying to hit something in quite a while.

STOP, STOP, STOP

Trust me. I got involved with someone I lived with and when it went sour it was pure hell. Drove me straight to happy pills for a year. It's great when you're in it... but when it falls apart you're faced with her every day. Ugh.

MacAvoy, here are some observations based on certain assumptions;

1 You chose to live with this woman for accommodation convenience? Yes? You didn't choose her and then accept the accommodation.

2 I don't see why you can't cook for each other, in multiple share accommodation situations, there is frequently a cooking roster. But that's where there is a group. Two of you together start playing happy homes and it's different. You start with the kino and it will be another living together relationship, just that it started the opposite way around. Is that what you want?

3 I'm sure you could get her, and you know you can, in fact I think after a week or so of good cooking by you, you would be 90% of the way there. But so what. I knew a guy who lived a long time with a woman, initially like this. But he couldn't resist the fringe benefits. But that means you don't get to try out other women without jealousy, so consider what's better. A pleasant room mate arrangement or a full deal, with all that it brings.

make like the opposite of the old Nike slogan and Just Don't Do It!...it's not worth it, remember that Men and Woman can be friends, sure there will be always be some sexual attraction there but it doesn't mean you have to act on it.

Don't go there

Man, if I were you I would keep it all business. I just stopped rooming in Vegas with a chcik from CA and it was all good at first. But after the fvck buddy stuff started the whole deal changed and she expected it. Took me about 3 months of total hell with her head trips till I finally moved out about 6 weeks ago. My advice from experience>>>DON'T GO THERE

Just my 2 cents

Sticky, sticky.

The problem is, unless she finds you repulsive (which I'm sure isn't the case), you're on an impact trajectory.

You know, you leave the shoe shop and walk home together in the fog. You're cold and damp when you get home, both relax on the couch and watch Seinfeld, then one of you looks at the other...

Just don't play games with her, like go on a friendly date when you both know implicitly that something more might happen.

My advice? Talk to her about it. Tell her you think she's attractive, but that it would be very awkward if anything were to happen, and tell you should be completely upfront and direct if either of you is thinking of taking it further. Just don't make it sound like an all-out rejection -- i.e., things might be different if you weren't living together.

Well you have to ask ur self a couple questions? What type of girl is she. IF you fukk her is she going to get tooo clingy.. Or is she the type were u can have sex with her and it wont change things.

Is it worth it you say you are not that attracted to her.

My opinion is just go for it, but only if u want it... Drink with her together develop some kino and see how it goes....

I would probably do her.

Maybe I'm finally maturing a little bit but after the first 5 or so posts telling me about the headaches etc.... I'm not going to make a move. I'm usually one of those guys saying not to dip your pen in the company ink, so realistically this is almost the same scenario.

I think the attraction is laziness on my part. The thought of waking up with a hangover, bein all horney and simply walkin to the next room. In reality we all know thats not gonna be happening. It would have to be the night before if I want to score.

I feel you on this whole issue. A female roommate just move in with me a week ago and she has got the best body I ever seen. In my book of looks, I would give her a 8. The situation is when she just get out of the shower and I am in my room watching TV, she would stand there and start talking to me with only a towl around her. What is a man to do? She is one of those women who like to flirt and everytime she leaves the house she always ask what do I think of her jeans, modeling them around for me showing me her a$$.