Looks are more important than you think! Merged [Official thread]

Many guys think that girls arent really into looks, but this is the biggest myth ever. Girls can just be as bad as guys when it comes to looks sometimes WORSE!.

Alot of guys claim to see tons of hot women (I'm talking about women with model looks with ugly guys), but the truth is you don't. These guys are either overatting the girl or under-rating the guy, or pecieve themselves as being better looking than they really are. If a lot of model dated ugly guys, you wouldn't look twice at an odd matched couple. And guys would never feel intimidated towards approaching a high maintainance girl.

But true women do often get the short deal when it comes to looks and guys still have more freedom to trade higher. A lot of hot women want money more than anything, so they may choose an ugly guy over a hot one.

Some guys thing on this forum that it was the ugly guy's personality game or attitude that won over the model. This rarely true if you see a hot girl with an ugly guy, she is making a big statement. She often deliberately chose this (if he is not rich), not the other way round. She is terrible insecure and wants a guy she can easily manipulate, I doubt it was for sex.

Some women don't care about looks at all, but then there are some women who are not that crazy about sex.

I have many friends who say personality is more important, yet complain about the lack of good looking guys. I use to always say personality was more important but each time found myself weighing a guy up on his looks.

When you do see a model with an ugly guy she never looks that happy, its definately not can't keep my hands off him.

Guys what I am saying for any woman to love you or be really into you in a sexual way she has to like you looks. Otherwise she is with you for another reason, usually for a calculated reason.

Many guys might not like what I am saying, but wouldn't you be upset if the girl you was dating wasn't physically attracted to you?

I've seen it twice, so I guess it isn't all that common, but it does happen.

One was an ugly guy I know that is a real jerk, and has lots of very good looking girls after him. You women love drama and he certainly supplies it.

Another is a guy I went to H.S. with, but he had popularity and a ****y and funny attitude going for him.

So, yeah, I guess your right.

I have been with quite a few very good looking women, I wonder if its because I look good, or because I have tons of confidence, and a ****y funny personality?

Mr. Mystery

Just note, I do sometimes she really good looking guys with average looking women. So I guess it happens the other way round too at times.

Originally posted by MysteryWoman
Just note, I do sometimes she really good looking guys with average looking women. So I guess it happens the other way round too at times.

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This has happened to me. The only reason I was out with the girl was becuase I didn't know how to tell the booty call we were not dating (almost all botty calls I have known were in denial). I would have made a horrible boss back then.

I agree that looks do matter - but only to an extent.

I think they matter when forming the initial attraction but after that they become secondary. Once you start to really care about someone their physical flaws become more and more transparent.

interesting thing is that physical attraction is purely psychological.

what a paradox, eh?

I don't really want to get all into it, but it's true.... look at it this way.... five hundred years ago, the most "beautiful woman" would nowadays be rated about a 6. A HB9 nowadays would probably be a middle-end prostitute back then.
That just shows that beauty is not universal.
I guess it doesn't prove that physical attraction is psychological, so I'll bring back some AFC memories....

Back in your AFC days..... remember that girl you had one-itis for? You could have sworn she was the most gorgeous girl you'd ever seen! Find a picture of her now. You'll prolly think "hey, she's pretty, I guess..... but she's not THAT hot...."
it was infatuation which made you think she was so pretty.

There is lots more to say about this subject..... maybe if I'm not too lazy I'll make a real post about it....... but I still believe that physical attraction (beauty, looks, whatever) is purely psychological......

which means, in a nutshell, looks don't matter -- attraction does.

Originally posted by MR_PERFECT
This has happened to me. The only reason I was out with the girl was becuase I didn't know how to tell the booty call we were not dating (almost all botty calls I have known were in denial). I would have made a horrible boss back then.

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Sorry I don't understand what you are saying, can you say this in English. What does booty mean?

.

Tommy Lee is not ugly, nasty but he isn't fat bald or wears glasses e.t.c. The Art of Seduction was written based on evidence which happen a hundred years ago, good abstract but poor practical theory. David D'Anglio is after your money!

Many guys think that girls arent really into looks, but this is the biggest myth ever. Girls can just be as bad as guys when it comes to looks sometimes WORSE!.

Alot of guys claim to see tons of hot women (I'm talking about women with model looks with ugly guys), but the truth is you don't. These guys are either overatting the girl or under-rating the guy, or pecieve themselves as being better looking than they really are. If a lot of model dated ugly guys, you wouldn't look twice at an odd matched couple. And guys would never feel intimidated towards approaching a high maintainance girl.

But true women do often get the short deal when it comes to looks and guys still have more freedom to trade higher. A lot of hot women want money more than anything, so they may choose an ugly guy over a hot one.

Some guys thing on this forum that it was the ugly guy's personality game or attitude that won over the model. This rarely true if you see a hot girl with an ugly guy, she is making a big statement. She often deliberately chose this (if he is not rich), not the other way round. She is terrible insecure and wants a guy she can easily manipulate, I doubt it was for sex.

Some women don't care about looks at all, but then there are some women who are not that crazy about sex.

I have many friends who say personality is more important, yet complain about the lack of good looking guys. I use to always say personality was more important but each time found myself weighing a guy up on his looks.

When you do see a model with an ugly guy she never looks that happy, its definately not can't keep my hands off him.

Guys what I am saying for any woman to love you or be really into you in a sexual way she has to like you looks. Otherwise she is with you for another reason, usually for a calculated reason.

Many guys might not like what I am saying, but wouldn't you be upset if the girl you was dating wasn't physically attracted to you?

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I dont agree with none of your statement. its all about fellings honey (thats right honey how you like that )

just because your a women dont expect me to fall to your knees and worship your everyword "a girl said it its true it must be true!"

it kills me to see dj's agree with certain things just cause a woman says it. other day I say a girl here say buy flowers for your girl and some DJ's actully agreed.

looks get the interview personalty gets the girl. its all in fellings if some ulgy guy can make you fell good. but a guy who looks like brad pitt and treats you like sh!t who would you date or marry whatever? answer me that and honestly.

some women dont even know what they want so if you dont know ill understand.

MysteryWoman,

I agree with some of the replies to this thread - if a guy can get a woman respond to her 'emotionally,' then he CAN get her even if he isn't stunning.

The most masculine men are men who create their own environment instead of adapting to the one they have been given, think of famous musicians, actors, entrepreneurs. Remember nobody really knows anything, that's the trouble here. That really hot guy you've been obsessing over could be a serial murderer for all you know.

Guys who are less good looking but REALISE this stuff, get very pis.sed off at the realisation, and decide to live life by their own rules. Society won't do it for them. Why should a guy who's committed crimes and treated people like sh.it be worth more than me, just because his parents were conventionally better looking than mine? Fcuk the society that laid down those rules, they're wrong, now I'll live by my own.

Now I know a lot of girls who are really average looking but really harsh about the way a guy looks. He HAS to be really good looking or she just is not interested.

But these women NEVER get what they want out of life.

They will never be truly happy.

Why? I guess because they know they are not worthy of being loved, because they are incapable of SEEING inner beauty - they can't feel real love, so why would anyone who's worth being loved by give a s.hit about them?

Sounds a bit harsh, but it's true.

Also, they just are NOT GOOD ENOUGH themselves to get a guy who's good looking but has other stuff going for him as well. So they just end up with an average schmuck because he's good looking, and they have to convince themselves that they're happy with what they have got.

I know guys who have supposedly unattractive features, but because they measure themselves by their own standards, they are driven by something internal, they DO become attractive. They don't carry themselves by society's standards, they play by their own set of rules.

They just don't give a s.hit, they have balls! Think of somebody like Mick Jagger, now plenty of HBs over the years have GENUINELY digged the guy, he's not what you would call good looking but he KNOWS what the he.ll he's doing on this planet. He knows he's number one.

So MysteryWoman, I get the feeling some as.sholes have maybe been really harsh about the way the way you look, which has pis.sed you off and led you to become really into looks yourself. But if so, try to move away from that way of thinking.

People like that are just t.ossers anyway, it's going to hurt, but try to ignore it.

People in general are less superficial than you think. In London, though, I have noticed that there seems to be this growing culture of people blaming sh.it that other people have done on another guy or girl, just because he or she is a member of the same sex as the person who did the damage. It's getting a bit nasty, I don't like it either.

In response to your question, though, remember, there are few guys with real attitude about and the HBs do respond to that.

Also, these guys know who they are, and they target HBs and avoid average looking chicks because the latter ARE often more superficial than the HBs.

One HB I dated, her friends couldn't see the attraction in me at all. Why? Because they judged men purely on looks, like they were characters in a soap opera or something. I couldn't believe how superficial they were, these were girls in their early 20s, it was so fcuking retarded I was amazed, the guy literally WAS what he looked like, that's all, they didn't care about ANYTHING else.

And here's the important bit: her friends assumed I was desperate just because THEY didn't find me attractive. It didn't cross their minds that a) I didn't find THEM attractive, and that I could do better anyway, or b) that other women might find me attractive.

That's the fundamental point of what I'm saying. Women are NOT more intuitive, empathetic etc., all that s.hit, you get the picture, than us men, we probably have MORE of a capacity for all that.

Instead THEIR view of the world is the ONLY view of the world. How psychopathic. We're talking about women in their 20s who obviously think a guy can literally shoot himself just because THEY don't find him attractive. If they don't find a guy attractive, they still have to assume that he finds HER attractive - even though he probably doesn't, because he's better at seeing WHO people are than she is!

Lol!

You get the picture. And there are guys out there who really do split opinion, I know for a fact, BECAUSE I AM ONE of them! When I go to nightclub I've often got negative comments from average chicks but the HBs genuinely dig me.

So, sorry MysteryWoman, there are certain realities going on here. Don't assume nobody wants a guy just because he's not great looking, because he could easily be a master DJ. No offence, but maybe they're just not talking to you because you look miserable and paranoid.

great reply Brad23.

Sorry Brad I have to disagree to some extent An ugly guy only gets the chance to win over Model through attitude if she lets him.
And Mick Jagger doesn't count because he is a multi millionaire.

And ugly guys with attitudes to do not get to date multiple models, they may have been lucky to get one or two. Because the majority of models usually go for good looking guys, it is the minority who aren't into looks or money(and they are not many REAL STUNNERS around)

But then again I have seen handsome guys with not so good looking girls.

And no no one has ever insulted me about my looks, I have dated a few guys with model looks-and a I have been told I'm good looking.

Some average girls are selective, but the stunners are worse.

Guys you have to realise that if you want a woman to be sexually attracted to you, she has to be physically attracted to you to some extent. Attitude alone won't do it, attitude is for maintaining the attraction.

Any man who doesn't believe that it's all about looks is FOOLing themselves. MysteryWoman, you say that women can sometimes be worse than men... SOMETIMES?!?!? Unless you have money, or fame, or power, a woman wants nothing to do with an unattractive man. And seloifter, there is no difference between looks and attraction. That's like saying there's a difference between water and ice. Looks are the basis for all sexual attraction between a woman and a man.

And you can go on and on about "I saw an ugly loser with a hot b1tch" or "Why is she with that ugly dude, he has no money or power?" WHY? because SHE finds him attractive, what you think makes no difference. Not only that, but perhaps she's working her way up the ladder-- going out with a less-than-great-looking guy until something better comes along. But for the time being, he LOOKS good enough.

Originally posted by MysteryWoman
Sorry I don't understand what you are saying, can you say this in English. What does booty mean?

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I didn't type "booty", I typed "Booty Call". If you don't know what a booty call is, maybe you are one.

Everyone wants a good looking lover. Can anyone,male or female say that they dont? Most people want someone who they feel is on thier level of attractiveness.So, your statment is true that looks are very important. In my opinion you can only date slightly above the way you look without something substanital to offer money, power, intelligence ect.. An example of this would be
if your a 5, a 7 is usually the highest your going to get. But, that doesnt mean someone who is a 5 cant get a 10, it does happen quite often when money is involved. My laywer ugly and rich=hot *****y wife.

Fame, power, money....

These are NOT ALWAYS things that people are born with, often they are things that they have gained as a by-product of the attitude to life which they have developed!!

People who ADAPT to their environment are the people who waste their money in seedy pubs and bars every night, whining with their b.itchy working-class friends about how the opposite sex only care about looks.

People who create their own environment think, hey, this sucks, why don't I concentrate instead on making some money, or live a life based on caring more for others, ANYTHING BUT THIS. Since there seem to be so many tos.sers about, at least it'll keep me away from those whinging shallow losers.

So they concentrate on their careers or interests or education instead, they have something INTERESTING to talk about rather than just b.itching on about the shape of someone's nose across the bar, and generally HAVE MORE OF A LIFE, despite their supposed physical flaws.

C'mon, people who wallow in self-pity due to what other people think about the way they look, are OBVIOUS. And people won't approach you, because if you come across as being shallow about the way you look, then you must be shallow about the way THEY look.

'HBs only go for powerful men.' Quite true, so how do you GET power?

By supplicating to the accepted rules? Or by constructing your own set of rules? MEASURING YOURSELF BY YOUR OWN SET OF RULES? Deciding that you are number one, you are stuck with yourself no matter what, and what are you gonna do about it? - that is a big step on this path. You have taken back the 'power' in your own life.

I would never criticise a HB who will go for a guy who has a great job, a great car, etc.

Why not? It shows he has been working on HIS life instead of hanging around in a bar every night talking about looks.

ALSO, don't tell me what I said previously was false, because I have been ME for nearly 24 years now, so I think I'm quite well qualified in saying that it's true!

It depends on the individual, obviously I do fit the contemporary mould to some extent, which is why opinions are split about me so much.

For example, I am six feet two inches tall, white, good hairstyle, good complexion, slim athletic build etc., so I will attract a certain group of women.

And these ARE often the HBs, don't tell me they're not, I'm me, I should know ffs!

Also, MysteryWoman I would like to know where you are from exactly, it's not Slough is it?!

The last time I went there I was shocked at how basic, uncultured and rude the locals were. Get out of that s.hithole while you still have the chance, it's eating away at your soul, so do something about it.

Seriously, to be so obsessed about looks demonstrates a total lack of joy in your life.

Who are you to call somebody 'ugly'?

Who said a model is necessarily 'beautiful'?

Maybe the 'ugly average bloke' and the 'stunning, oh-so-beautiful model' actually understand each other quite well and simply like each other?

True, you don't see many four feet tall Chinese dudes with six feet Scandinavian blondes, so I agree there is a certain limit, there are certain prototypes that are difficult to define, but a woman knows what she likes when she sees it, and many women just do not GET another woman's taste in men, so they just assume that he has a lot of money or whatever.

Usually, however, it is down to their ignorance, as women's taste in men DOES actually vary A LOT, and women are just selfish in thinking that their taste in men is 'the right taste' and anything else is 'wrong' just because SHE doesn't like it.

But you miss out on life by generalising about things.

Originally posted by billythekid78
Find out about Gabriel D'Annunzio, for one example. He's mentioned in Robert Greene's "The Art of Seduction." He was an almost ugly man who was the best seducer of his time. Or Voltaire, he was an ugly man and had his pick of woman. Socrates was the ugliest man in Athens, but he married the most beautiful woman around.

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Or fragmentor, who is unbelievably skinny and yet gets any woman he wants

Daaaamn. Brad23 is a Don Juan to watch in the future! Keep up those posts man! Now Mysterywomen, I noticed that your signature says "the b!tch" which I agree with. Although, it should also read: "arrogant, stuck up, self centered, and whiny as hell if someone even finds something REMOTELY close to proving that I am wrong." Looks are the most important thing out there? Please inch your face closer to the screen. Closer, closer, closer, so your nose is touching it. Good. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Maybe looks are important if the female is UGLY, ARROGANT, or a GOLDDIGGER. Although, you could be right...looks are important...after all, there are more female porn stars then males. Go figure. If looks are so important, how come skinny ass, pasty as dough, acne faced (ok, just the red marks are left), semi-athletic (kicker in football, everywhere in baseball), dumb as bricks, poor as poor can be, me get some of the hottest chicks around? Looks? Phesh. Attitude? Yep. Now Mystery, I don't want to insult you too much, but if you think looks are the most important thing out there, then don't look in the mirror. You'll be dissapointed.