The Book Recommendation thread

I never was interested in reading books but then after being helpless and bored I decided to delve into a few. I read this book called ''Think Big'' by Ben Carson which was almost like his autobiography and not really helpful as a self help manual but , it had a key point where he said that he got incredibly intelligent unconciously by reading lots of books .

Before he knew what was happening he started spewing out information he had read from books during his conversations with people and therefore shocking them with his intellect. By reading this book I learned that I had to start reading books ( lol! ) and now I find it fun to read as well as being helpful in making me a more multi-faceted conversationalist.

I read the 48 laws of power and it supports this theory by explaining that it is better to learn from the mistakes of others that have gone before you, most of the time.This helps you avoid lots of wasted effort and energy used when you figure things out on your own. Of course there are exceptions where nothing beats experience but you get my point.


The purpose of this thread since no one has come up with this, is for anyone who feels like sharing to post in here, books that have helped you in your personal development. It could be in any area at all such as dating , finance/investment, fitness, inner-game, conversation e.t.c. This is your dumping ground for the books that have made you the man you are today so go ahead and post.

I will be starting first by listing a few of the books that have got me going . I recently bought a massive wad of books to help give me some internal assuredness and I think its safe to say that I am a changed man now and will not be looking back if i can help it! I have read a few of them and will briefly review them but the rest are yet to be read so I will update as I go. I will also randomly from time to time post realizations that I am getting from my experience of dealing with chicks. Here is ze list ;

1.) ''Hold your head up high'' by Dr Paul Hauck
2.)Overcoming social anxiety and shyness by Gillian Butler
3.)God is a woman by comedian Ian coburn (arguably best dating book in the market currently)
4.)Feel the fear and do it anyway by Susan Jeffers
5.)How to be your own best friend by Dr Paul Hauck
6.)The articulate Executive by Granville.N.TooGood
7.) Assertiveness by Dr Windy Dryden and Daniel Constantinou
8.)Instant Confidence by Paul Mckenna
9.)Stop thinking start living discover life long happiness by Richard Carlson
10.) Super coach 10 secrets to transform anyones life by Michael Neill
11.)Critical Thinking skills by Stella Cottrell
12.) The 48 laws of power by Robert Greene ( didn't buy this in the flesh)
13.) 10 steps to positive living by Windy Dryden


Will update in a hot minute with brief reviews of the ones I have read feel free to add yours..........

I'm going through "No More Mr Nice Guy" by Robert Glover right now. It's definitely a good read for those AFCs, including myself, that need work on their inner game. It's giving me a lot to think about and work on.

1.) Hold your head up high by Dr Paul Hauck.

If there is a book that stays true to the saying of never judging a book by its cover, its THIS. It has such an unassuming but cute cover and when I first saw it I said to myself that it would be a fun read and I had no major expectations but boy was I wrong.........

Wow! this book is just loaded. Alot of guys ask for tips on inner game and posters such as interceptor explain what inner game is time and time again but their explanations can be difficult to grasp. Ladies and gentlemen this book puts things in perspective and gives you all you need to know about inner game in a simple yet direct manner. In fact it should be renamed the inner game handbook. It deals with issues such as assertiveness, the fact that you are neither a good person or a bad person, the reason why self esteem is bad and also why you should not rate yourself or others. For people who feel inferior in the presence of others who seem cooler than you (e.g hot chicks and jocks) , this is a must read.



2.) God is a woman by comedian Ian coburn - This is the best dating book I personally have read so far and believe me I've read about 10 dating books.
This is the pinnacle of explanation in terms of getting better with chicks and the best part is that it is ridiculously easy to read as well as being crack your ribs funny! I am flipping amazed that no one has mentioned this book on this site because its been out since 2004!

It touches on issues such as never assuming when dealing with chicks , why asking a babe if shes single is not really always good, why sometimes you should just swallow your spit and make a move and most importantly this book is not about tricks and gimmicks.

As this book unfolds and you read this guys' hilarious stories, it unconsciously trains your mind to believe that going for girls should never be a task and that it can actually be done and you just realise that its not as big a deal as it can be made sometimes. You just start to feel the need to go out there and get your hands dirty (*ahem*, excuse the pun, get your mind out of the gutter....) . One more very important thing this book shows us, hence the title of it, is that you are not always to blame for the way chicks are, they are b*tchy mostly (not all chicks of course) so get over it!

You actually start to lose your bitterness for chicks when you read some of their horrible antics in this book cause you see that that's the way they are which is self-destructive most of the time. If your gonna get just one dating book in your life it should be this. This is a f*king funny and valuable book seriously get this!

3.) 48 laws of power by Robert Greene

I ain't gonna tell you what this is about ( cliffnotes) cos its 400 pages and thats monstrously long. All I will say is that it is an essential tool for self improvement cos it covers a lot of facets of life. I shared this with the forum in one of my previous threads so just do a search on my thread making history if u wanna own your own electronic copy.

I will post more later when I am less tired..............

GDrake said:

I'm going through "No More Mr Nice Guy" by Robert Glover right now. It's definitely a good read for those AFCs, including myself, that need work on their inner game. It's giving me a lot to think about and work on.

Click to expand...

I own that book and it was quite helpful in letting me realize that I needed to be nice to myself first before being nice to others.

I am proud of myself because in my first ever post on this site , I said I wanted to cure my bitterness with women and I have succeeded and so can you.

Realizations set A

1.) Do not discount your achievements during your road to self improvement /success/ +ve change no matter how little others may think/say to you it is.

2.) There is a PIMP in every one of us, no matter how much of a loser you are /think u are right now, no matter how shy ,awkward e.t.c you may be . He is caged inside you , he's in there........

3.) Inner game is the only thing you need to change , its the be all and end all. Once you get this handled every thing else becomes a breeze.

4.) You can get any girl you want as long as she does not reject you while you are trying and as long as you don't reject yourself.

5.) Even the worst people (i.e people that piss you off) have good in them.

6.) never rate yourself or others, accept yourself.

7.) Social graces such as saying ''excuse me'' before talking to a chick are usually detrimental as they put you in the mindset of a beggar. Be gruff and to the point e.g say ''hey'' and then start talking, instead. Chicks are your equals after all. (Credit to IgetIt! for this one)

8.) Don't be discouraged if you read material and don't see an immediate change because the changes will be subconscious and will come out at the right time (during your day to day interactions/ experiences)

9.) It is often said that having demands upon your life expectations leads to dissapointment if not fulfilled . Its also said that eliminating your demands ( you want said thing to happen but understand it may not and accept this fact) cures this.

It therefore would follow that this applies to chicks and that putting demands on their behaviour is what leads to bitterness and therefore accepting them for what they are while being non-judgemental will weed out this bitterness.

10.) Self help books are often bashed but they DO actually help provided you get the right ones. You can do this by going to online book stores and reading both positive and negative customer reviews which will allow you to make an informed decision.

11.) Women ARE mind readers when it comes to relationship matters/thoughts us men have.

12.)If you read only 2 books from the list in the first post of the thread let them be God is a woman and hold your head up high. Hand on heart , I promise you they will change your life/outlook. They will help to mesh together all you have read on this site into one big ball.

More to follow..............

13.) Majority of women are mirrors so it is YOUR fault that you suck with them . Even if you only think of them as being crap but never show it in your actions, they will be able to tell so therefore your mindset is key in the sense that if your facial expression says '' Gosh she's attractive but I hope she aint a ***** and won't play games, the chick will pick up on this and be defensive.

So......let your mind be free. Embrace that they do messed up stuff but accept this fact and be non-judgemental.

14.) Having a hobby no matter how little, diverts your mind from your lack of chicks and opens up your mind to new possibilities as well as giving you a new sense of personal pride. It also gives you stuff to talk about.

If people ask me what mine are I will say that I freestyle rap (which I just do for fun in my bros room while he produces music beats) , I go to the gym and I read books. This makes me seem like an active person to the person who asked the question.

15.) Never assume a woman's relationship status bcos you will miss out on opportunities and if possible try to see girls with boyfriends who don't look too serious as a couple as potential targets. It will help decrease your scarcity mindset.

16.) In order to be good with chicks , you need to be at an acceptable level of normality/self-comfort in terms of interpersonal relations when dealing with people generally. (shout out to my brother for giving me this one)

17.) Women's sexually attractive parts are a trap if u are not sexually comfortable because they will lead to you not being able to see them as equals hence why sex sells so much. Try to curb your hunger a bit and not gawk at these body parts before there is some comfort unless u are a super player with good game.

18.) Sometimes getting the ball rolling in one way or another is all thats needed to make a good start towards positive change. An example of this would be going to a club alone even though you are super shy and have never done it b4, or talking to the stranger beside you in the club when you wouldn't normally do this.

19.) Think as you like but do like others (credit to 48 laws of power) . This was evidenced to me after I read a post by someone on this site who said that he lost his virginity when he decided to go out bowling one night with friends when he would normally not have done this.

He acted like the life of the party when according to him he was the most quiet and shyest in the group every other time and then he got chatting to this broad who could see him displaying higher value and she offered him her number. The rest was history for him.

I thought about this one and realised that sometimes a facade is all you need to get started , dress how you wouldn't normally dress, do what you normally wouldn't do cos people go by appearances mostly. This has helped me be less bitter towards preppy looking babes as I know some of them may be actually cool people who are blending into the crowd of followers while the rest may have no substance.

20.) GTA IV (grand theft auto 4 the video game) is very helpful in teaching guys who are too scared and clueless to expand their social circles , just how easy it can be. Niko bellic the main character in the game gets missions from mob bosses and police chiefs and he does them successfully and is then given new contact numbers of other people who need jobs done and he accepts these contacts with no fear whatsoever .

The game also shows you that being gruff but having a heart helps with the ladies as is evidenced when niko is driving his dates to activities and they comment that they know he does bad stuff but he seems like he has a good heart. Get this game if u can and observe.

21.) Focusing on negative things such as chicks being *****es will actually blind you completely from seeing the good thats in front of you. Example, normally in the mall I would walk around with negativity on my face, thinking of how messed up chick behaviour is and would get a few IOI's but nothing major and was wondering what was wrong.

My mum came to town and was with me recently and we were shopping together and I got meaningful IOI's which could be said to be competition anxiety but I think it had to do with the fact that I was relaxed and happy and was unashamed that I was shopping with my mommy. She's since left and I still get IOI's.

22.) When something negative happens dont just go home dissapointed and then forget the event. Analyse what you did wrong and what can be done to improve then put it in practice the next time.

23.) Its said that you should realise that girls take craps too but this method doesn't help much. Instead strive to improve your inner game to the point where you can walk past a group of 9's with crap (aka doo doo) on your face without feeling ashamed (You can always lie to them that its chocolate ice cream).

Mystery also advocated this in his book called The venusian arts by saying that a way to display higher value to a hot chick would be to pretend to blow your nose while talking to her which shows you are unaffected by her beauty.

24.) Bitterness holds you back a lot as well as having inner game. As dbot said here, its best to have unconditional love for life, yourself and others . Bible belt also said this in his post .

When you remove bitterness, dating becomes fun where you feel like your learning each time and have added a new LEGO (TM) building block of knowledge and game to your skill set.




Poem/ freestyle


Title - The student becomes the mentor


I want you to come with me to the sky where the stars lie

Come with me up high

Take my hand & come, lets fly.......

Great thread big props to op, inner game is king.

Inner game is the essential to everything in OUR lives, women being a small part in this. Life is a solo event, the only thing you will have for the duration is your ownself. Every other person and material posession will come and go, but yourself you will be till the end. We are born alone and will end this way, we strive forward toward in life for our own ambitions, not others. Self discovery and improving inner game.

It is just these things that happen to be the very thing that attracts women. Self confidence, security, power, ambition, love for life ie. inner game. But we dont do it to attract women, we do it for us. This is the correct mindset. The women just happen to be attracted to us, we dont need or dedicate ourselves to them. Again this is the exact mindset to have, and again we dont do it for anyone else, we do it for ourselves.

It is these inner game mindsets that is what we try to emulate with outer game. Outter game is the image created by inner game.

some thoughts u kno.

I got some straight FIYAH ! for y'all , will post in a hot minute......................

( translation for ebonics/slang racists on this site: hi guys I have some valuable info to share with you will post in a couple of hours or 10..........)

Ease said:

Great thread big props to op, inner game is king.

Inner game is the essential to everything in OUR lives, women being a small part in this. Life is a solo event, the only thing you will have for the duration is your ownself. Every other person and material posession will come and go, but yourself you will be till the end. We are born alone and will end this way, we strive forward toward in life for our own ambitions, not others. Self discovery and improving inner game.

It is just these things that happen to be the very thing that attracts women. Self confidence, security, power, ambition, love for life ie. inner game. But we dont do it to attract women, we do it for us. This is the correct mindset. The women just happen to be attracted to us, we dont need or dedicate ourselves to them. Again this is the exact mindset to have, and again we dont do it for anyone else, we do it for ourselves.

It is these inner game mindsets that is what we try to emulate with outer game. Outter game is the image created by inner game.

some thoughts u kno.

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hey my fellow uk dweller , i agree 100% with what you say.

realisations set B

Now for these set of realisations im just gonna use a machine gun approach and write them in an essay format.

I have to start by saying that self help books have really helped me as they are like having a free shrink dr in the comfort of your own home . Feelings like depression and jealousy and depression are actually mental illnesses (mental immaturity) but are seen as normal because almost everyone has these constantly . So definitely handle your innergame by getting self-help books or visiting a shrink thats really good because as has been said on this site, when you handle your innergame you stop seeing woman as over important and they start showing you more interest and coming to you and you end up developing a passion for life not just pvssy

You are gonna learn how to befriend the so called ''jocks'' , how to reduce the amount of rejection you feel when interacting with babes and how to recognize comeons from chicks . What do most of these skills tie onto? BEING ASSERTIVE ! When you become assertive , you realise that you do have a sense of humour but your just not confident enough to dare to use it, that you can actually deal with difficult people and interact with them properly and learn some things from them.

Anyway let me define assertiveness as I know it. Oh one more thing , most of what I'm saying is as a result of reading Dr Paul Haucks work which is amazing but I wouldn't class him as a messiah because he taught me through his books that you shouldn't hold anyone or thing in over high regard in comparison to yourself.



ASSERTIVENESS

Being assertive involves standing up for your rights and actually speaking up when you feel that someone wants to take you for a fool or attack you verbally or even physically. When you are assertive you realise that your confidence increases because you actually start to value yourself and you start being at ease with who you are. A lot of people think they are not assertive but every single one of you IS assertive . Your response times just vary .

Let me elaborate ....... If someone was to abuse you , depending on where your social confidence levels are, you might respond and let them know that their behaviour is unacceptable and that you won't stand for that OR you would rationalise that it is no big deal and let it slide. If you choose to let it slide , you will be making a mistake because you have effectively given that person permission/agreement to push you around. In effect silence is agreement. If that same person was to abuse your mother , how would you react? A lot of people here would not stand for that regardless of who the person is. So your reaction rate to being stepped all over is essentially an indication of how assertive you CHOOSE to be most of the time. Some people jus choose to be passive everytime until they are pushed to their limit. Being assertive is simply speaking up and saying something when you are wronged.


If you want to be assertive , simply point out what you don't like in what a person is doing or defend your case verbally. It might not come out right when you first do it but with more and more practise you will begin to do it with ease. Passive people internally choose to not respond when they are aggravated and this leads to them being frustrated, they rationalize in their minds how what the person did was no big deal but they are harming themselves in the long run by doing this.

If you can rationalise how what the person did was no big deal you can also rationalise how you should speak up for yourself at that moment. When a time arises where you feel u should speak up e.g if a person cuts you infront of you in a queue and you feel yourself rationalising why you shouldn't say anything and wanting to wimp out & not state your case, rationalise in that same way how you should state your case and DO IT! ( as politely yet firm as possible) With time your attempts will become more tactful and polished .


Ok so how does this relate to dealing with people you THINK are higher value than you?

Firstly no one is better than you unless you think they are. One way to firmly get this into your head is to learn to stop rating yourself and also stop rating other people (stop making comparisons all the time) . Hey their achievements are great , so what? Hey my achievements are great , so what? Realise that some people are good at some things and you are also good at some things which you may discount as being useless but which are really not. e.g you may think that a footballer is great at what they do but that same guy might not be able to handle his finances while you may be expert at this but terrible at football.

That does not make you any less better than him or him less better than you. Realise that the greatest achievement which all humans share anyway is that of being alive.So stop feeling inferior to other people. ( this philosophy is explained in depth and better in the Dr Paul Hauck book called Hold your head up high ).


Secondly , realise that no one person is totally good or totally bad. There have been cases where priests become paedophiles and nazi concentration camp officers become human rights campaigners. This would therefore imply that you judging someone as bad is flawed , they are not bad but their behaviour is. That same boss that screams at you will go home and make his little 3 yr old daughter smile and might also be an exceptionally good responsible family man. Knowing this helps you put things in perspective so that you don't judge that player guy when he says he smokes weed and was once a male stripper.




when trying to befriend these so called ''high value guys'' realise that they will be difficult with you if they sense that you do not value yourself.They might also be difficult just for the fun of it and your reaction will determine how you are treated . When you call them out on their behaviour you show that you respect yourself and it causes them to back down. e.g guy insults you in front of a group of girls or guys or one-on -one, instead of keeping quiet you could say that he shouldn't be so immature and that there is no need for that type of behaviour (don't say this verbatim just internalise the concept of speaking up for yourself).

Even if someone has been pushing you around a lot in the past you can still change the situation late on.

By having all these pieces of knowledge you can then proceed to befriend these so called ''high value males''. When they see that you are assertive and are not needy for validation of yourself by them, they relax around you and you can then proceed to copy the fvck out of them by observing the way they deal with babes and whatnot.

You also need to non-verbally communicate in a non- arrogant way that you can live without them and do not need them or their company for internal satisfaction.Upon doing this you see that the opportunities in your life expand cos you see that no one is better than you unless you give them the permission to make you think that way or unless you assume that they are and accept it as fact. e.g i used to feel inferior to some certain people and also judged them based on what they did as being bad but now that I cut out both behaviours , I get along with them and find them sometimes trying to validate their actions and themselves to me.


Also I am now going to see an arsenal football club game with one of them because he informed me of this and its always been my dream to do this before I died but, I used to think I never would. So as you can see life begins to expand and openings begin to appear.

will continue part 2 shortly ........need to break these things up you know.

How to Talk to Anyone - Leil Lowndes

Very useful book.

On to the chicks

If you never want to feel overly rejected when dealing with babes , first cut out your bitterness which i explained a bit earlier in this thread. Then learn how to assert yourself when dealing with them. Most chicks will be rude as a defensive mechanism but you may not even need to be assertive if you show true inner happiness and self respect in your body language and vibe [this naturally happens when your mind is in a good state and you are truly confident (which is gained from assertiveness and experience)] and you go after girls who actually show they are interested in you.

Even if a girl likes you she might still act b1tchy at first when you go holla at her . If she does this you can call her out on her behaviour (which has been said a million times on this site without being explained fully). You call her out by being assertive i.e refusing to be verbally stepped on. e.g I was talkin to 2 lesbians once and they said I looked skinny for the type of job I was doin (doorman at mc donalds) and they only said this after i refused the chips they offered me and I asked them if i look hungry. I simply said 'ok mum' and they went silent , had no comeback and were speechless.

If a girl is being rude with you , you can simply say ''hey no need to be rude'' i.e point out the exact action they are doing. Some of you may feel guilty doin this , thinkin it might ruin the vibe but assertiveness is learning how to not feel guilty for standing up for your rights cos obviously when you refuse to be assertive you think you might hurt the persons feelings but what you are doin is training them how to behave by being assertive.
PUT THEM ON THE SPOT .They have the mental strength to put you down so they can take a little correction as well provided you are not too harsh but you are firm.This is how bad boys get into panties. They are not afraid to get into the uncomfortable situations that come with having minor conflict. When you know at the back of your mind that you can alwways be assertive when things go wrong in your interactions , it helps you be more confident and to not dread rejection as much.

Another thing to bear in mind when hollering at babes is that they give undercover signals of interest which can be pieced together and you can use to make a move that will most likely be successful.e.g I was on the train the other day and this babe asked me how she would know the stop was hers , I answered but I knew at the back of my mind that the question was dumb cos she knew the answer already but the YAboi of before would have brushed it off as being nothin. I didn't number close cos she was headin to the airport, i was with a male friend and didn't feel like it (which leads me to this - don't always shotgun approach just cos you wanna improve cos it can leave u feeling dejected , do it when you feel the signs are there and when you wanna do it) . She later kept glancing over at me while I was chattin with my friend which made me know I was right in my suspicions of interest.

What Im getting at is that if your mind tells you that its an opportunity, it probably is. I learned this by reading a post on sosuave from the guy who blogs on georgeulysses.com that linked me to an article on his site which linked me to read Leill Lowndes undercover sex signals. After reading this book I thought I had wasted a lot of hours of my life because of a lot of the stuff in it about courting chicks with drinks and certain behaviours but make no mistake the signs in the book are so true i.e girls are so sly and subtle with their interest, its ridiculous . A copy of the book can be read on scribd.com by typing its name into the search bar on that site.

When you go at a girl that you think has shown you interest , with the attitude that her pvssy is yours, a love of life and non bitter attitude and a knowledge that you can defend yourself from put downs by being assertive, the pvssy could potentially , highly be yours for the taking.


Also try and copy a lot of the behaviours chicks exhibit e.g they are confident of who they are , they are not afraid to make others feel guilty when necessary, they call others out on bad behaviour ALL the time, they are in tune with their sexuality,they are not scared of eye contact e.t.c (just don't act like a fag)

credit to Dr Paul Hauck for the book ''how to stand up for yourself'' which is where assertiveness is explained in more simpler detail.

Rhoto said:

How to Talk to Anyone - Leil Lowndes

Very useful book.

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I will definitely be checking that out although, now that Im assertive and don't rate others or myself I find it so much easier to do this. But .....you can never stop learning.


edit - when i got confident after reading these books I hit a slump (this was before i read the assertiveness book) . By slump I mean i got depressed again and slightly bitter(nowhere near as much as b4 my enlightenment though) towards chiks again and I really think it had to do with me jacking off my tool and them being difficult and me not being assertive. When I first read the books I abstained for a 10 day period and was on cloud nine , but then went back to jacking off and got angry with chicks and life cos I felt out of control,was putting out a hungry vibe again & therefore being rejected through their body language. I think this is because of the cocaine/drug-like effect that sex has.

Now that I've read yet more of these books and am more knowledgeable and happy , im on cloud nine again as I have been practising abstinence from jacking off and now Im more comfortable with people due to learning how to be assertive so I think these 2 factors have helped. I intend not to jack off for the whole of october and then see how I feel after I relapse . Hey, maybe I might get laid b4 then *wink*, *wink* but I'll be indifferent either way if I do or don't .

Don't Be Nice, Be Real - by Kelly Bryson - A must read for anybody still dealing with lingering AFC qualities. While I don't necessarily adhere to the "nonviolent communication" tactic anymore, this book did wonders for laying the foundation necessary to root out all of my deeply indoctrinated people pleasing tendencies.... which is really all being an AFC is.... pleasing others before yourself.


How to Talk to Anyone - by Leil Lowndes - Somebody else already mentioned this, but I had to give it my endorsement as well. There is a lot of useful advice on how to freely socialize with people and become more outgoing in general. Very useful.


The 50th Law - by Robert Greene and 50 Cent - If you've read the 48 Laws of Power (as well as the 33 Strategies of War and the Art of Seduction), you'll definitely be interested in reading this one as well. This book teaches how to develop a completely fearless mentality toward everything in life which makes applying all the other 48 laws that much more effective. It was inspired by a lenghty period of time Robert Greene spent following 50 around after the two had met and 50 informed him that he was a big fan of the 48 Laws of Power. This book basically explains the mentality 50 Cent developed growing up in the dangerous, life and death atmosphere of the streets and breaks down how to develop the same mentality without having to go through what he went through. I didn't even like 50 Cent when I bought this book, but I earned a whole new respect for him after reading it.

The count of monte cristo: one of literature's greatest classics.

By Alexandre Dumas

A book about one man's quest on revenge and seeking out to improve all aspects of his life to achieve it. Not exactly a self help book, but it shows true determination and goals in a fictional perspective. A great read.

The Power of Now. Definitely changed the most in me than any other book.

And I'm not the only one.

This book is earth shattering. I'm not kidding. I almost had to puke once I realized some of the things that were in there because I was so incredibly overwhelmed. It's that mind-blowing.

How To Make Great Conversation And Small Talk by Sean McPheat: This book isn't even a seduction guide but it helped my game MUCH more than any other book has. They say that the most important part of a relationship with a woman is communication and somehow most of these dating books have completely missed it or did a poor job of explaining how to tackle the problem. Well, this book literally made me a different person overnight. I'm a MUCH more social person now and I'm not afraid to engage into conversation with anyone as I was before. Not even exaggerating, this book has changed my life.

David X ebook: This is basically David X's Relentless Program in a book and in my opinion, it's a lot better than the seminar because you can go at your own pace. I used to not like David X; thought he was way too ****y and thought he was the perfect representation of these new waves of *******s that think being a jerk is the way to seduce women. When I gave him a chance, I was just blown away by what I was reading. He offers nothing but great advice to help you build your inner game and his teachings is so much simpler than what other dating gurus have to offer. And you know what? The book is only 11 pages long but I've learned much more from those 11 pages alone then I have from almost all of the seduction guides I've ever read combined.

The Art of Worldly Wisdom by Balthasar Gracian -

Written in the seventeenth century, The Art of Worldly Wisdom has become an underground best seller, valued for its timeless insights on how to make one's way in the world. The author, Baltasar Graci n, was a chaplain, confessor, college administrator, and professor who lived a courtier's life in the company of viceroys, aristocrats, statesmen, and military leaders. In three hundred maxims, Graci n offers sage advice on how to impress superiors, confound rivals, and get the most from subordinates. Like Sun Tzu's Art of War, Machiavelli's Prince, and Lao Tzu's Tao Te Ching, Graci n's Art of Worldly Wisdom is one of those rare books that serve as enlightening guides and companions for life.

Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom -

Maybe it was a grandparent, or a teacher or a colleague. Someone older, patient and wise, who understood you when you were young and searching, and gave you sound advice to help you make your way through it. For Mitch Albom, that person was Morrie Schwartz, his college professor from nearly 20 years ago. Maybe, like Mitch, you lost track of this mentor as you made your way, and the insights faded. Wouldn't you like to see that person again, ask the bigger questions that still haunt you? Mitch Albom had that second chance. He rediscovered Morrie in the last months of the older man's life. Knowing he was dying of ALS - or motor neurone disease - Morrie visited Mitch in his study every Tuesday, just as they used to back in college. Their rekindled relationship turned into one final "class": lessons in how to live. This is a chronicle of their time together, through which Mitch shares Morrie's lasting gift with the world.

A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle -

Eckhart Tolle's A New Earth will be a cornerstone for personal spirituality and self-improvement for years to come, leading readers to a new levels of consciousness and inner peace. Taking off from the introspective work The Power of Now, which is a number one bestseller and has sold millions of copies worldwide, Tolle provides the spiritual framework for people to move beyond themselves in order to make this world a better, more spiritually evolved place to live. Shattering modern ideas of ego and entitlement, self and society, Tolle lifts the veil of fear that has hung over humanity during this new millennium, and shines an illuminating light that leads to happiness and health that every reader can follow.

Thanks to everyone who has contributed book names and reviews in this thread and well done in terms of educating yourselves and others , keep em coming sosuave crew!


I never thought I would get where I am now but hey presto , here I am. I remember when I used to lurk the forums 2 years ago and think of the posters on this site as performers of amazing feats. My heroes then were DonGorgon , edger, jon024, Maxtro, Caped crusader08, Duffdog, KontrollerX, ElStud and noob.

These guys helped me through my darkest days of uni before I joined the site cos reading their posts made my day. Their posts were emotional,entertaining,educational and most times ,funny as hell.

Now I have reached a point where I value myself so much so that its no sweat off my back to call these guys ''heroes'' en quote.My point is just to tell lurkers that joining this site is the 1st step towards self-development and growth if you're lackin in those areas. It only takes literally 5 minutes to join the site free of charge and from then on you are on your way. One warning I would give to newbies is to not post so much until you are at a self satisfactory level of personal growth because posting recklessly will derail you from your path and keep you in the matrix of followers. The best approach after joining would be to seek advice from those whose advice you read and think is very knowledgeable by sending them queries through private messages (PM) .

This site is almost like a personal diary of your life which forces you to commit towards achieving your goals and that effect is mostly be obtained when you are a member. Although I would say the coaching I received from oldschooler when I joined was unsuccessful in terms of me reaching my desired destination, it was successful in the sense that it helped me identify my weaknesses and exposed me to them enough to make me know what I needed to change specifically. Therefore by the time I came in contact with self help books I knew which ones I needed and now have sorted my issues out and am as happy as I was in my childhood now (maybe even happier, its kinda scary but im sure with time I'll be used to it).

I have since got some more books since starting this thread but I am sure they are the final books I will be adding to this thread and I will give a few reveiws when Im done with my final segment piece on assertiveness.Here is the list of books (some of which I have finished reading);

14.) Jealousy by Dr Paul Hauck
15.) Think your way to happiness by Dr Windy Dryden and Jack Gordon
16.) Depression by Dr Paul Hauck
17.) How to stand up for Yourself by Dr Paul Hauck
18.) Why be afraid by Dr Paul Hauck
19.)How to do what you want to do by Dr Paul Hauck

These books are dirt cheap off Amazon ( the online store)

Now some advice for uni students

- keep your room as tidy as possible as often as possible as your immediate living space is a reflection of your mindstate so if your room is messy , you won't really be at peace and your mind will be chaotic.

- Reading more will help you improve at your reading skills and you could find your self coming out with a 1st class if you so desire. This is because repetition breeds expertise and although it will be boring and difficult at 1st , you will begin to notice patterns and it will become a breeze as well as fun.

- Dr Ben carson (who is a brain surgeon and writer of the book Think Big) said that the brain only operates at 10% of its capacity in most humans so, if you make the excuse of not wanting to fog your brain realise that there is more than enough capacity and space for you to learn all those difficult concepts you are taught at uni. So overload your brain! it can take it . Just don't overwork yourself to the point of exhaustion or illness, all things in moderation.....


-Do not underline important parts of books when reading if you can help it cause it stops your learning and assimulation flow. At first I used to do this when I was reading my 1st set of self help books but then saw that it slowed me down badllllly. Instead just go over the important concept in your head for as long as it takes u to understand it. That way your brain juices are still working and the flow is still there.

I will explain assertiveness some more now before writing some more reveiws....

How do you know when to be assertive?

When a person , offends you there are some times that you can actually let it slide and this could be if they did it by mistake , but the main way to know when to be assertive is when you physically feel it. Yup you heard me right, when your body feels awful it is signalling you that you have been crossed a bit more than you should be. So when you feel angry or weak or like a loser after a putdown , then that is when you should act. You should also act if you feel like the person will continue if you let it slide.


More on how to assert yourself

In order to assert yourself very nicely indeed, just point out the exact action that the person is performing , for instance if youre talking to a girl and she is acting uptight , you could say ''hey why are you so tense, Im just getting to know you to see if you would be worth hanging out with''.

If you're with a group of guys and they offer you weed but you decline and they start calling you a pvssy, you could say ''haha you guys are trying the oldest trick in the book to make me feel small for not wanting to take weed with you''. See how humour was injected there? This leads me on to the fact that when you are assertive you begin to see that a sense of humour is not that hard to develop because it is just a modification of your assertive words to sound less serious because in that example you could say ''hey stop trying to make me feel small just so I take weed with you'' but that would probably ruin the mood.

Shy guys are scared of ruining the mood by being aggressive and standing up for themselves and this is the only reason why they are shy. When you learn that people will not die when you ruffle their feathers and that they are tough cookies themselves for being able to tease you in the 1st place , you begin to have enough confidence to stand up for your rights more and more and then people pick up on your confidence and don't even want to mess with you in the 1st place anymore. This is when you realise that the only cause of your shyness was fear of rejection and of the unkown rejection that you think can come if you stand up for yourself.

Knowing that you have assertiveness in your arsenal to be able to bring out whenever needed gives you confidence because all confidence is , is knowledge of how situations or processes work. Therefore when you have this confidence , cold approach anxiety becomes a thing of the past. The only fear you have is fear of not knowing what to say if a chick rebuffs you when you approach her and this dissappears when you become more assertive.


You also become articulate when you learn assertiveness because , you no longer fear running out of words to say because you can twist someone elses words and use them at will.

To sum up, when you become assertive, fear of cold approaching and shyness dissappear, you become articulate and you can employ ****yfunny at will by twisting your assertive words.

Now for some brief reviews............