Why Girls Today are Flakier than Ever Before and How to Adapt to Game in this Era

spinaroonie · Nov 29, 2011

The late 2000s saw a dramatic acceleration in the growth of female-centric communications technology - namely, the explosion of texting, social networking, and online dating.

IMO all the growth in technology has had a negative effect on game. Simply, girls today have more options and more distractions literally at their fingertips than ever before. They get their egos stroked constantly on Facebook. They have guys constantly blowing up their smartphones texting them out. They get hounded with hundreds of messages on online dating sites. They’re getting constant attention and validation and being pulled in all directions.

There was a time when “getting a number” actually meant something. You’d call her home and she’d pick up, you’d have an actual phone conversation, you’d set up a date and she’d actually show up. It sounds like something from the Jurassic period but the older guys here will attest to this.

Now it’s 2011. How many threads have we read here where a guy seemingly has a great interaction with a girl in a club and gets the number, only to have the girl screen out his call or ignore his texts a few days later? “Flaking” as a verb didn’t exist in the 90s or earlier – flakes were something that came with dandruff.

It’s funny to read guys in here still crowing about getting numbers. Fellas, numbers means nothing. How many of those numbers are translating to dates and lays?

Girls today give out their number like candy on Halloween. Girls will give out their number to get rid of you. Girls will give out their number just to get their egos validated from constant texts. Girls will give out their number even when they have no intention of seeing you again.

Now guys will come on here and say that it’s all a numbers game – that you need to talk to 100 girls and get 20 numbers, play these little text games, and maybe get 3 dates out of it.

Who has time for that sh*t? I have other demands on my time – I work, I study, I work out, I volunteer, I have hobbies, and spend time with family and friends. Far better to invest in one quality interaction with one quality girl that I’ll be assured of eventually dating and laying.

Game 1.0 is dead. It’s time for Game 2.0 – game in the smartphone era.

Rule #1 for Game 2.0: Numbers from bars and clubs mean nothing. 90% of the numbers you get from bars & clubs will flake. PUSH FOR THE PULL.

puabestmate · Nov 29, 2011

This is so true. Unless it's a match made in heaven, love at first sight, getting her number, even getting her agree to the dates don't mean a ****, especially interaction time was under 10 minutes during day game. She may felt some excitment and attraction while you were there. Once you were gone, you are out of her sight, out of her mind.

A lot of poeple blame on weak phone game whatever, it's not the case. I gave up improving phone game, it's too hard. Just ditch the technology all together. None of the BB pins, skype none of that will help you getting closer to her *****. I find the only thing that improve the odds is to extend the first interaction. At least get to the rapport stage, and do multiple venue changes if you can - walk with her, preferrably to her house if possible. Kiss close her on the first encounter. However, if you just want make out with a girl on the street it's not too hard. I've done it under 10 minutes, but again it means jack ****, she will flake when you schedule a date because the kiss probably felt too fast too sleazy. A good kiss is filled with tension and aticipation, not just attraction.

Another really REALLY good way to improve the odds that she does not flake is to have a real purpose of 2nd meeting rather than "date" or "Getting to know each other". Actually fnid out what she is interested, what she NEEEEDS! then make your invitation actually have value to her. Granted, if she is attracted to you enough, you are the value enough to make her come out. But I am talking about average joe like myself, don't have Brad Pitt looks or Bill Gate's bank account. So offering something concrete and fun on day2 surely make her less flaky.

Mike32ct · Nov 29, 2011

OP:

I love your threads. You are at the cutting edge and see the game for what it really is NOW, not how it used to be or should be. +1

Definitely go for the pull. Or as I think Evan said, if you do take a number, text her THE SAME NIGHT. You might get her to meet up with you after she gets away from her friends. But either way, the principle is the same. You must strike when the iron is hot.

Otherwise, once that "Club High" (credit: Solomon) wears off, in most cases, it's over.

nismo-4 · Nov 29, 2011

spinaroonie said:
The late 2000s saw a dramatic acceleration in the growth of female-centric communications technology - namely, the explosion of texting, social networking, and online dating.

IMO all the growth in technology has had a negative effect on game. Simply, girls today have more options and more distractions literally at their fingertips than ever before. They get their egos stroked constantly on Facebook. They have guys constantly blowing up their smartphones texting them out. They get hounded with hundreds of messages on online dating sites. They’re getting constant attention and validation and being pulled in all directions.

There was a time when “getting a number” actually meant something. You’d call her home and she’d pick up, you’d have an actual phone conversation, you’d set up a date and she’d actually show up. It sounds like something from the Jurassic period but the older guys here will attest to this.

Now it’s 2011. How many threads have we read here where a guy seemingly has a great interaction with a girl in a club and gets the number, only to have the girl screen out his call or ignore his texts a few days later? “Flaking” as a verb didn’t exist in the 90s or earlier – flakes were something that came with dandruff.

It’s funny to read guys in here still crowing about getting numbers. Fellas, numbers means nothing. How many of those numbers are translating to dates and lays?

Girls today give out their number like candy on Halloween. Girls will give out their number to get rid of you. Girls will give out their number just to get their egos validated from constant texts. Girls will give out their number even when they have no intention of seeing you again.

Now guys will come on here and say that it’s all a numbers game – that you need to talk to 100 girls and get 20 numbers, play these little text games, and maybe get 3 dates out of it.

Who has time for that sh*t? I have other demands on my time – I work, I study, I work out, I volunteer, I have hobbies, and spend time with family and friends. Far better to invest in one quality interaction with one quality girl that I’ll be assured of eventually dating and laying.

Game 1.0 is dead. It’s time for Game 2.0 – game in the smartphone era.

Rule #1 for Game 2.0: Numbers from bars and clubs mean nothing. 90% of the numbers you get from bars & clubs will flake. PUSH FOR THE PULL.

QFT!

I've got this in the courtroom files. +1!!!

Seriously, always take risks. Unless you have a lot of money, you've gotta take your lumps like a man!

synergy1 · Nov 30, 2011

i have been a long time proponent of the idea from this and other related threads. Simply put, there are too many options available for most women in order for an average person to stand out. Getting a phone number or more isn't a guarantee these days. Most women (and men too) are looking to date up so having options available at their fingertips means that most men are nothing more than a medium for attention.

I have been trying to investigate changing how to play this game a little bit. Here are a few highlights to what I think guys should do to help their odds.

- Come off more as a player than as a guy without options. Women would rather compete over a winner than settle with a loser. I used to downplay it when chicks asked me if I was a player, now I subtly hint at it. Sometimes not very subtle.

- Text less. Easy way to differentiate yourself from the hordes of losers, and come off as if you have options. Respond if a chick talks to you though. We don't need to be rude

- Have options. Pretending you have options is a good way to start, but work on the real thing. Chicks can smell an obvious fake, but they can just as easily tell when you have options.

- If these are chicks you know and see regularly, don't rush in. Make them friends. When they see other girls hit on you, than you won't even need to do work.

All of these sort of tie in, and are really a simple summary of what this site promotes. They key is to continue to differentiate yourself, stay positive and optimistic in your endeavors.

Kerpal · Nov 30, 2011

The OP is right. A lot of the advice here about getting numbers, waiting a few days to call, etc. is outdated. Numbers don't mean anything, women give their numbers out like candy these days, ever notice how everyone has 2,000 numbers in their phones and 2,000 facebook friends even though they only talk to about 10 of those people regularly? It doesn't mean anything anymore.

And if you wait 3 days to call, the girl has been bombarded with hundreds of texts and calls from other guys since then, she's probably already forgotten who you are.

Alex DeLarge · Nov 30, 2011

As of right now, I have about 50% success with chicks in bars. But I usually approach girls that seem like they'd have common interests with me. Girls in band tee shirts I've heard of or with a rock and roll look.

I agree totally though. Technology is ruining everything that had developed through the 90s with the PUA community. The reason being, is that men are TOO FVCKING AVAILABLE these days.

Now, even if a guy goes across the country on the other side of the continent from his sweetheart, he can still see her 24/7 on his "skype" program, or text/call 24/7 on his cell phone. That stuff didn't exist back in the 90s and 80s.

Also, with texting.. The guys who were too pvssy to call a girl before have an alternative form of communication. Same with facebook. Don't even get me started on facebook and online dating when it comes to game.. So many AFC dudes on there constantly complimenting girls.. Girls that won't even talk to them.. Girls that would never be SEEN in public with them. Half of these dudes can do WAY BETTER than the girls they're complimenting too if they just had a little bit of game.

It's time to take it to the next level definitely. But what direction can we possibly go in? I like the idea of the instant date. Pick up a woman in a bar or club, instantly go for a walk around the city or something similar.

5string · Nov 30, 2011

I know why they are flakier.

Their little hamsters became inbred over time. Now they are genetically fvcked up and will not function properly as in days gone by.

Gameness · Nov 30, 2011

I've been thinking about the exact same issue OP is posting about.

The only way to overcome facebook and the hordes of AFC's, is to destroy her ego with a sledgehammer.

It's time we as men learn to be ****y, self confident, charming semi-douchebags. Imagine standing on a streetcorner in NY in the 1950's and watching a group of italians go to work on a passing girl. If she played up herself like she is a goddess, they would shout out at her and generally just act like a group of dominant males hunting a female.

We need to separate outselves from the majority (AFC's). And we have to do it truthfully.

Packers2010 · Nov 30, 2011

Alex DeLarge said:
It's time to take it to the next level definitely. But what direction can we possibly go in? I like the idea of the instant date. Pick up a woman in a bar or club, instantly go for a walk around the city or something similar.[/b

i like this. i think if your in one pub you could say to the girl.

" look we are going to pub X for a drink" then along the way there you could " get to know her" then go back to the other pub.

Burroughs · Nov 30, 2011

Espi said:
Actually, it seems women everywhere (and of all shapes and sizes) seem to have no problem conveying demands and expectations, while offering absolutely nothing in return. The majority of women don't even seem to sell themselves anymore...and it's because they feel like they don't have to.

For every DJ who refuses to put up with her bullshiat, there are likely 10 AFC's willing to bend over backwards to secure companionship.

Yes demands and expectations...Over the last year I must have spoken with 30+ women....6-7HB, low pay 35K job who thought they were entitled to a HB 10, 300K dude....too funny.

And yes the problem is that for every 1dj who rejects one of these entitled biaches there are a 100 afcs who will slobber over themselves to get one.

AFCs represent a true irritant for the DJ in that they provide entitled woman a solace and companionship they do not deserve...of course as our economy crumbles the truly successful males will have an advantage.

corrector · Nov 30, 2011

When I follow-up with a lady, say six months, or even a year or two after I get her number, then ask her out (out of the blue), on two occasions she said yes. My experiment also was not to have any telephone rapport and just go by arrangements.

Both girls had the same result, they flaked on me. They agreed to meet with me, but never called me to finalise, or they never returned a text to finalise.

So, I'm now thinking that you may need to have "rapport" with a girl and actually talk to them. I use to think waiting a year or two was too long to follow-up, but now I think it's because of the "rapport".

In2theGame · Nov 30, 2011

spinaroonie said:
The late 2000s saw a dramatic acceleration in the growth of female-centric communications technology - namely, the explosion of texting, social networking, and online dating.

IMO all the growth in technology has had a negative effect on game. Simply, girls today have more options and more distractions literally at their fingertips than ever before. They get their egos stroked constantly on Facebook. They have guys constantly blowing up their smartphones texting them out. They get hounded with hundreds of messages on online dating sites. They’re getting constant attention and validation and being pulled in all directions.

There was a time when “getting a number” actually meant something. You’d call her home and she’d pick up, you’d have an actual phone conversation, you’d set up a date and she’d actually show up. It sounds like something from the Jurassic period but the older guys here will attest to this.

Now it’s 2011. How many threads have we read here where a guy seemingly has a great interaction with a girl in a club and gets the number, only to have the girl screen out his call or ignore his texts a few days later? “Flaking” as a verb didn’t exist in the 90s or earlier – flakes were something that came with dandruff.

It’s funny to read guys in here still crowing about getting numbers. Fellas, numbers means nothing. How many of those numbers are translating to dates and lays?

Girls today give out their number like candy on Halloween. Girls will give out their number to get rid of you. Girls will give out their number just to get their egos validated from constant texts. Girls will give out their number even when they have no intention of seeing you again.

Now guys will come on here and say that it’s all a numbers game – that you need to talk to 100 girls and get 20 numbers, play these little text games, and maybe get 3 dates out of it.

Who has time for that sh*t? I have other demands on my time – I work, I study, I work out, I volunteer, I have hobbies, and spend time with family and friends. Far better to invest in one quality interaction with one quality girl that I’ll be assured of eventually dating and laying.

Game 1.0 is dead. It’s time for Game 2.0 – game in the smartphone era.

Rule #1 for Game 2.0: Numbers from bars and clubs mean nothing. 90% of the numbers you get from bars & clubs will flake. PUSH FOR THE PULL.

Have to agree here 100%.

the_stig · Nov 30, 2011

My buddy and I just made a fake female profile on pof just for laughs; I fully expected to be completely inundated with messages, I mean that's a given, but I was just completely taken back by what I saw.

Within seconds of clicking "create profile" I had three instant message requests, 60 seconds later I already had about five messages and multiple meet me requests, and now sixteen pages of emails after 24 hrs. It's like a mass of Zombies wading around just looking for fresh meat to pounce on.

I know there are mixed opinions about pof on here, but I feel that site as a whole is representative of the kind of attention your average female receives in todays society. At that rate, there's just no possible way to stand out, no matter how good you are. A surprising amount of messages are *NOT* very afc sounding either. A mistake we make is assuming that every guy, unless on a pua forum, is a chump.

Frankly it just makes me glad I'm in a relationship and done with the nonsense. It's getting to the point where dealing with the flaking and frustration just isn't worth it to get your **** wet for ten minutes.

We should be working out where the next hotspot will be (think: Yahoo chat late 90s/early 2000s, MySpace 2005, Facebook/pof 2009), so what's next?

synergy1 · Nov 30, 2011

the_stig said:
A surprising amount of messages are *NOT* very afc sounding either. A mistake we make is assuming that every guy, unless on a pua forum, is a chump.

I would rate a higher percent of online attempts as more towards AFC than in real life. Anyone in real life who can approach regularly is probably doing okay. Within the spectrum , I'd say the community falls above the norm in many regards but there are plenty of guys who do really well with women who do not/ won't post online.

Demonpenz · Dec 1, 2011

I like the post, but I hope there is a segment #demongame that plays it for fun
Gathers points, has fun, gets numbers, etc for fun. It is fun for me to play the game for fun. It entertains me and keeps my skills sharp for when a girl really likes me.

Demonpenz · Dec 1, 2011

#demongame is going to include a strict point system and achievements like xbox. The game is going to be the reward not the vag. Jump on grenade for friend achievment unlocked
No love stains in jeep after suv sex 10 points.

AlexLefty · Dec 1, 2011

Alex DeLarge said:
Same with facebook. Don't even get me started on facebook and online dating when it comes to game.. So many AFC dudes on there constantly complimenting girls.. Girls that won't even talk to them.. Girls that would never be SEEN in public with them. Half of these dudes can do WAY BETTER than the girls they're complimenting too if they just had a little bit of game.

Omfg this sh1t pisses me off like no other! It's like I don't realize how the guys don't understand what they're doing when they "like" and post comments like "how did you get so cute" or "sexy" etc. on the girls newly uploaded photo. Even though I wasn't alive in this era, I can imagine how a males AFC status could be an advantage to us because the girls would see how much of a prize we are. Now, the AFC males are more detrimental to us because of the internet & texting etc.

Alex DeLarge said:
It's time to take it to the next level definitely. But what direction can we possibly go in? I like the idea of the instant date. Pick up a woman in a bar or club, instantly go for a walk around the city or something similar.

Off the top of my head I'm not really sure how we can "take it to the next level". We just need to be more smooth, charming, and alpha than any other generation before us., to make us stand out. Sounds spectacular right?

Alex DeLarge · Dec 1, 2011

Honestly, Alexlefty.. I don't think women can even admire a dude being smooth anymore. I remember back in the summer I literally had this girl head over heels for me after 2 dates. She would tell me "I can't stop thinking about you" "You're so hot I want to fvck you so bad" etc.. Then a week later, she stops contacting me. I don't mean to sound like I'm all that and a bag of potato chips, but I'm probably the best this chick has ever got. I only got a BJ out of her, but she's never been charmed that much before. I could see it in her eyes. Then she just threw it away. Tough luck for her.

Lord Shinra · Dec 2, 2011

Espi said:
Really meaty post, spinaroonie.
Actually, it seems women everywhere (and of all shapes and sizes) seem to have no problem conveying demands and expectations, while offering absolutely nothing in return. The majority of women don't even seem to sell themselves anymore...and it's because they feel like they don't have to.

For every DJ who refuses to put up with her bullshiat, there are likely 10 AFC's willing to bend over backwards to secure companionship.

Never has so much truth been posted in one paragraph. I was having this conversation today amongst mixed company. It amazes me how women ***** and moan about how we dont do anything, but they dont feel the need to do anything either. If only..

Why Girls Today are Flakier than Ever Before and How to Adapt to Game in this Era

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