Kailex
Master Don Juan
So as of this Saturday, I will finally hit the big 3-0.
I've seen past posts about being close to thirty or dating in your 30's, and well, I've had certain revelations over the past year.
I've officially been registered with this forum since January and the things I've learned and have shared with others have been plenty. I've read SoSuave for a few years but I never really digested the material until 2010.
In this year, I've lived out a ONEITIS of my own, I've gone through some major physical changes thanks to the H&F forum, and I've met quite a few people here which I've interacted with 1 on 1.
Things have changed for me, but it seems that they stay the same for a lot of the new posters or even posters of old. To those turning 30 soon or fearing that 30 is a cutoff, I have a message for you:
At age 30, I'll just be getting started. Technically, my new life began at age 29. I went horseback riding, have been to NBA games, been out to different parks, done some hiking, went on a cruise, etc, etc, etc...
It's been the most exciting year of my life and I am carrying that momentum over to my thirties. I've become a better person and a better man and surprisingly found that the more I focused on myself, the less miserable I was about the "dating game". I no longer had to sit at a virtual drawing board wondering what negs worked and what games to play. No. I was looking out for myself and in the meantime, dating plenty of women. I've met many interesting ones, many hot ones, and many crazed lunatics, but all of those experiences (good or bad) have helped me form a better idea of what works for me and what doesn't.
To all of you who think that being single at 30 is the end of the world, I can assure you, it's definitely not the end of the world. You are better off not getting married before 25... hell, even 30. At 18, I was in peak physical shape and hardly had a date. I had a 6 pack, a killer haircut and wicked fashion sense. I could hardly get a date. I was desperate and couldn't get a date.
At 29, I'm not even trying and I'm cutting women off left and right. I'm not as fit, but I'm getting there. I used to shave my head but now have it styled and longer. My fashion sense is that of a man now and not a teenager wearing baggy pants and G-Unit shirts. I work on myself and anything else comes after. I'm done with the shaming tactics and social conventions that Rollo has posted about time and time again. Now that I've employed the "Agree and Amplify" tactics taught to me by Warrior and JoPhil, I've kept all naggers of the female-kind at bay when they ask me why I am not married or have no kids.
I'm not married, by accident and now by design.
The same with kids.
I live for myself and if that is selfish, so be it. I am the most selfish person in the world, but guess what, I am happy.
I have a job, a great apartment, live in a kickass neighborhood, have plenty of friends, have lost weight ridiculously, amongst other things...
Notice how I excluded mention about women there? It's because they come last. And that's how I am keeping it.
Will I eventually find someone for me? Maybe, but for now, I am dating many someone's. I am NOT alone. Whether I die up old and shriveled by myself... we'll see. But I'll only be 30 and not 75.
What else have I learned?
- I get more attention at age 30 than I did at 18, because of my maturation process and because I understand the game now. I have options. When I was 18, I was indoctrinated to find THE ONE. At age 30, I know this is rubbish. All of a sudden, I'm high value simply because I'm NOT LOOKING. I enjoy the company of many women.
- A wise man once said to me: Monogamy is not the option, but a last resort. I thank him for that (although I am paraphrasing), but the phrase alone switched all of my own mental conventions.
- Red Flag = Ditch. Two Strikes, SOMETIMES. Had someone ***** at me after the second date because I didn't call in the appropriate timing? Ditched. Someone who came 20 minutes late without even considering calling me to tell me they were late. Ditched. Someone who started "playing" with my phone. Ditched. I don't care anymore. The first few weeks of a relationship are supposed to be easy. I am NOT putting up with any inconsiderate behavior. Sure, if she calls me to tell me she's late... that's fine, it HAPPENS. But setting a standard from the beginning of tardiness is NOT going to cut it with me. There are many more women out there. The options are bountiful.
- Enjoy life. That's right, something so simple... something overlooked by many posters. So much stock is put into this whole thing. I'd be dumb to say: There's no point to all of this. But there is... there's enjoyment from going out and meeting different women and bedding them. It's an addendum to an already busy and enjoyable life. And since I don't tolerate with any childish and unwanted behavior, it stresses me none. Life is to be enjoyed. And we do not enjoy life when women are miring our lives with all the added crap that the Red Flaggers possess. There's no need to keep those women in our lives. Everything about you is #1. They are #2 and I would expect for women to think the same thing. No one should ever be focused on LTR's until they feel they have savored so much of this world that they've found someone suitable for one. Life is too short to NOT be enjoyed while you can.
I missed out on a lot of my 20's by sticking around in an LTR that I knew was going nowhere. But because I was fed the blueprint of having to marry in my 20s... I thought that my LTR was as good as it was going to get. LIES, all LIES. My life is as good as it gets NOW that I am turning 30 and am single and enjoying it.
But guess what...
It's going to get EVEN BETTER.
I encourage all men, to seek our their happiness in the form of the things they love to do, the things that keep them busy and going... and not in the form of the other gender. You could never possibly be happy through being with a woman when you can't be happy on your own.
I'm excited for a new decade of my life. I've already gotten the momentum from age 29 going into age 30. This WILL be my best decade yet.
I've seen past posts about being close to thirty or dating in your 30's, and well, I've had certain revelations over the past year.
I've officially been registered with this forum since January and the things I've learned and have shared with others have been plenty. I've read SoSuave for a few years but I never really digested the material until 2010.
In this year, I've lived out a ONEITIS of my own, I've gone through some major physical changes thanks to the H&F forum, and I've met quite a few people here which I've interacted with 1 on 1.
Things have changed for me, but it seems that they stay the same for a lot of the new posters or even posters of old. To those turning 30 soon or fearing that 30 is a cutoff, I have a message for you:
At age 30, I'll just be getting started. Technically, my new life began at age 29. I went horseback riding, have been to NBA games, been out to different parks, done some hiking, went on a cruise, etc, etc, etc...
It's been the most exciting year of my life and I am carrying that momentum over to my thirties. I've become a better person and a better man and surprisingly found that the more I focused on myself, the less miserable I was about the "dating game". I no longer had to sit at a virtual drawing board wondering what negs worked and what games to play. No. I was looking out for myself and in the meantime, dating plenty of women. I've met many interesting ones, many hot ones, and many crazed lunatics, but all of those experiences (good or bad) have helped me form a better idea of what works for me and what doesn't.
To all of you who think that being single at 30 is the end of the world, I can assure you, it's definitely not the end of the world. You are better off not getting married before 25... hell, even 30. At 18, I was in peak physical shape and hardly had a date. I had a 6 pack, a killer haircut and wicked fashion sense. I could hardly get a date. I was desperate and couldn't get a date.
At 29, I'm not even trying and I'm cutting women off left and right. I'm not as fit, but I'm getting there. I used to shave my head but now have it styled and longer. My fashion sense is that of a man now and not a teenager wearing baggy pants and G-Unit shirts. I work on myself and anything else comes after. I'm done with the shaming tactics and social conventions that Rollo has posted about time and time again. Now that I've employed the "Agree and Amplify" tactics taught to me by Warrior and JoPhil, I've kept all naggers of the female-kind at bay when they ask me why I am not married or have no kids.
I'm not married, by accident and now by design.
The same with kids.
I live for myself and if that is selfish, so be it. I am the most selfish person in the world, but guess what, I am happy.
I have a job, a great apartment, live in a kickass neighborhood, have plenty of friends, have lost weight ridiculously, amongst other things...
Notice how I excluded mention about women there? It's because they come last. And that's how I am keeping it.
Will I eventually find someone for me? Maybe, but for now, I am dating many someone's. I am NOT alone. Whether I die up old and shriveled by myself... we'll see. But I'll only be 30 and not 75.
What else have I learned?
- I get more attention at age 30 than I did at 18, because of my maturation process and because I understand the game now. I have options. When I was 18, I was indoctrinated to find THE ONE. At age 30, I know this is rubbish. All of a sudden, I'm high value simply because I'm NOT LOOKING. I enjoy the company of many women.
- A wise man once said to me: Monogamy is not the option, but a last resort. I thank him for that (although I am paraphrasing), but the phrase alone switched all of my own mental conventions.
- Red Flag = Ditch. Two Strikes, SOMETIMES. Had someone ***** at me after the second date because I didn't call in the appropriate timing? Ditched. Someone who came 20 minutes late without even considering calling me to tell me they were late. Ditched. Someone who started "playing" with my phone. Ditched. I don't care anymore. The first few weeks of a relationship are supposed to be easy. I am NOT putting up with any inconsiderate behavior. Sure, if she calls me to tell me she's late... that's fine, it HAPPENS. But setting a standard from the beginning of tardiness is NOT going to cut it with me. There are many more women out there. The options are bountiful.
- Enjoy life. That's right, something so simple... something overlooked by many posters. So much stock is put into this whole thing. I'd be dumb to say: There's no point to all of this. But there is... there's enjoyment from going out and meeting different women and bedding them. It's an addendum to an already busy and enjoyable life. And since I don't tolerate with any childish and unwanted behavior, it stresses me none. Life is to be enjoyed. And we do not enjoy life when women are miring our lives with all the added crap that the Red Flaggers possess. There's no need to keep those women in our lives. Everything about you is #1. They are #2 and I would expect for women to think the same thing. No one should ever be focused on LTR's until they feel they have savored so much of this world that they've found someone suitable for one. Life is too short to NOT be enjoyed while you can.
I missed out on a lot of my 20's by sticking around in an LTR that I knew was going nowhere. But because I was fed the blueprint of having to marry in my 20s... I thought that my LTR was as good as it was going to get. LIES, all LIES. My life is as good as it gets NOW that I am turning 30 and am single and enjoying it.
But guess what...
It's going to get EVEN BETTER.
I encourage all men, to seek our their happiness in the form of the things they love to do, the things that keep them busy and going... and not in the form of the other gender. You could never possibly be happy through being with a woman when you can't be happy on your own.
I'm excited for a new decade of my life. I've already gotten the momentum from age 29 going into age 30. This WILL be my best decade yet.
