Notice how I capitalized so much. I grasp the reason why awkwardness in general is looked down upon by women (sign of low confidence/weakness, makes thing uncomfortable, etc), but I really don't see why they have to look at if it's some incurable disease. I say this because I can be a rather awkward guy and some girls tend to make a huge deal out of my awkwardness as if it's the only way to describe me.
Why do girls hate awkward guys SO MUCH?
- Thread starter lazikia
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AlexTheGreat
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Think about it from their point of view. Do those girls who think you're awkward see you in non-awkward situations? Do they see you in situations where you are cool/funny/interesting? Probably not, hence the reason why they think you're awkward, and don't like you for it: because that is all they know about you. Show them a different side and you'll see a different reaction.
AlexTheGreat
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That's because you care of the outcome. You try to show a different side because you want them to notice a different side. They will still feel as if you're awkward because you will still be: you'll be making extra effort to act different.
That is not the way. You must act different for yourself and ignore what they think completely. If they feel you are still awkward, screw them; you don't need them. Act for yourself, and once on the path to change, keep the path and don't stray.
At first people will think you're pretending, because they're not used to seeing you acting that way. But with time they will see that the change is real, and get used to it, and change their own attitude towards you.
That is not the way. You must act different for yourself and ignore what they think completely. If they feel you are still awkward, screw them; you don't need them. Act for yourself, and once on the path to change, keep the path and don't stray.
At first people will think you're pretending, because they're not used to seeing you acting that way. But with time they will see that the change is real, and get used to it, and change their own attitude towards you.
Rata Blanca
Senior Don Juan
You wanted the reason?
This is why: http://es.youtube.com/watch?v=Fwv0-d7MKw4
This is why: http://es.youtube.com/watch?v=Fwv0-d7MKw4
You're right it is a huge deal to women. I don't know anyone actually good with women who's awkward at all. I guess this is because awkwardness signals that you lack all of the qualities of a good lover. Imagine an awkward guy in the bedroom. He can't get it up, he fumbles with the bra, he's nervous and groping things in strange ways, he's making the girl uncomfortable rather than turned on, and if he's not doing that he's just boring. Why the hell would any girl want an awkward guy? The guy could look like Brad Pitt but if he's awkward like this in the bedroom then he's useless.
Another reason is that women care about how they look with a guy in public. You can imagine how she feels about him when she watches him make awkward social graces with all her friends and embarrasses her. Not good to say the least.
I suggest you work on projecting confident smooth body language to start; the old fake it till you make it approach. At the same time write out affirmations about how smooth and fearless and sexual you are. Speak slowly, confidently, and relaxed but loud. When you are in a group be looking to give value. You are not there to take anything but instead to contribute to the energy of the group dynamic. Pay attention to what smooth people you know do as they do.
These things are more like band aids though. A lot of awkward guys I know have deeper self-esteem problems that need to be addressed. If you suffer in this way maybe counseling would help.
Another reason is that women care about how they look with a guy in public. You can imagine how she feels about him when she watches him make awkward social graces with all her friends and embarrasses her. Not good to say the least.
I suggest you work on projecting confident smooth body language to start; the old fake it till you make it approach. At the same time write out affirmations about how smooth and fearless and sexual you are. Speak slowly, confidently, and relaxed but loud. When you are in a group be looking to give value. You are not there to take anything but instead to contribute to the energy of the group dynamic. Pay attention to what smooth people you know do as they do.
These things are more like band aids though. A lot of awkward guys I know have deeper self-esteem problems that need to be addressed. If you suffer in this way maybe counseling would help.
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WaRpEd
Senior Don Juan
It IS a disease. Your awkwardness will spread to them if your around them. Thus making them feel extremely awkward. Don't complain about how society gets annoyed around awkward people. Instead educate yourself, train, and cultivate confidence. I know you've read it a million times around the site assuming you've done your homework.
In my language, the word awkward translates "uglovatiy", literally means "angular". Just like the word implies - your actions are NOT "flowing". Clever, huh? In Russian this word has even a worse connotation.
There were a few times up until a year ago or so, that even my mom would notice me being "awkward" in some social situations, and she was like, never be like this again please, it looks very unappealing, as if you stole something, or as if you are trying to cover up something. She's very good as spotting such things. We were on a family vacation, and me and her were walking to our hotel, and this guy walked behind us, then walked faster, and she caught a glimpse of his face as he walked by us. Shifty eyes, stiff/fast walking. She's like "wow, he's so awkward and creepy... it's good that you're walking with me right now, I got scared".
She's in her forties, but she thinks more like a younger person. So yes, being awkward is a REPELLING quality, women get almost scared by it
There were a few times up until a year ago or so, that even my mom would notice me being "awkward" in some social situations, and she was like, never be like this again please, it looks very unappealing, as if you stole something, or as if you are trying to cover up something. She's very good as spotting such things. We were on a family vacation, and me and her were walking to our hotel, and this guy walked behind us, then walked faster, and she caught a glimpse of his face as he walked by us. Shifty eyes, stiff/fast walking. She's like "wow, he's so awkward and creepy... it's good that you're walking with me right now, I got scared".
She's in her forties, but she thinks more like a younger person. So yes, being awkward is a REPELLING quality, women get almost scared by it
So true.WaRpEd said:
And being awkward means that you're not comfortable with the situation.
Look at it from their point of view, if you're talking to somebody and they're acting awkward it usually means they are uncomfortable with the situation. This is the vibe they give. Now you being to feel the vibe (feel uncomfortable). It spreads.
If you were talking to somebody who was a happy funny person then thats the vibe that person gives. This makes you feel better and lightens the atmosphere.
You see now why many people avoid awkward people?
comic_relief
Master Don Juan
What is your take on awkward girls that just freak people out?
I think that you might just answer your own question.
comic_relief
I think that you might just answer your own question.
comic_relief
DonGorgon
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MOst young hot girls wanna look coo, and they want their man to make them look cool too, not awkward.
MacAvoy
Banned
Why do guys hate fat ugly women so much?
MacAvoy
Banned
I'll spell it out for you just in case you don't know, because THEY ARE NOT ATTRACTIVE. Its that simple my friend.
DonGorgon
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Cause hey are fat and uglyMacAvoy said:
Alphamale1821
Senior Don Juan
because awkwardness is not an attractive alpha quality of a man. It's a quality of an insecure Chump, and believe it or not chicks dig confidence.
penkitten
Master Don Juan
because it makes them feel uncomfortable.
MooseGod
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What if you're doing the robot? :cheer: :banana:
i have a lot of girl friends so i can give you an answer straight from the horse's mouth.lazikia said:
they got burned out by the awkward guys. any hot girl was once naive, she gave some awkward guy a chance. then he started acting weird. stalking her. talking weird ****. being really really weird in bed. saying very offensive things without even realizing he's offensive. he also couldn't take a hint and couldn't take no for an answer. he would keep calling her over and over and over. he would leave her messages at 3am in the morning. he would talk about marriage after knowing her for 2 days. he would show up at her place unexpectedly and tell her how he couldn't stop thinking about her. he would just be a very very bad and PERSISTENT presence in her life, and she couldn't get rid of him no matter how hard she tried. she might even had had to start fearing for her safety.
after it happens to a girl once, she becomes very cautious. after it happens twice, she will never let an awkward guy near her again.
so it's not your personal fault, maybe you aren't like that. but most awkward guys are, and you just get caught in the generalization. you're just in a bad category.
