Hello everyone,
I have been here for about 1 year, I've noticed a huge change in myself and my outlook on life in that one year. I was a lurker like many, even though i had made an account, i barely posted...etc. However, at the end of this 1 year period, I' ve come up with some realizations. I'm going to first of all talk a bit about myself, and then what I have come to realize. You can skip to whatever part you would like, the main purpose of this article is for me to get all my thoughts down on one page.
I. Life story(abridged)
II. What I learned
I. Life story
In my school, a really small school, I was a bit the middle class, with a lot of hobbies. Not a super-nerd, not a jock. I would never get beaten up because I was tall, I would hang out with everybody ( quite a bit more with the nerds), yet I had no success with girls. Well let me rephrase that. I only got into girls last year. I had quite a few tell me I was cute, and typically, that I was nice. Those comments would flatter me. Don't worry, this post isn't gonna be about how i turned into a jerk or whatever, but basically, before, I was the type of nice guy that would garner no respect. But I didn't care, besides the girls, my friends respected me, etc... I didn't really have issues. However, I really wanted a girl. I was scared as hell of talking to one, though I stumbled on this site, same story as most I'm guessing. I spent a year looking at articles and taking in the wrong stuff. I was so insecure I would take comfort from other's failure stories (true) and get inspired by motivational articles. Meanwhile, my attitude would not change, and I would still lack the balls to approach. This site was not a resource, it was a security blanket. Then i got MSN messenger, a little late lol- like 2years after every one else. I was fulfilled, I thought i was finally going to get some girls, here was an unintimidating way to talk to them. However, soon this became my only way of talking to girls. I became addicted to MSN, it began taking from my hobbies. I did gain a little bit of confidence and some experience, and some girls started liking me, but this was liking me as friends. After a while i realized- this would not help me get some girls, it eliminates the whole eye contact/ kino aspect which makes a conversation implicitly sexual or whatever. My flirting with the girls was obvious and when i would do it, it wasnt really flirting- the conversation would get sexual but it would not hint to my sexuality. We were talking about sex but I wasn't really implying i was capable of it. Bottom line- MSN messenger was an improvement over my previous pretty bad state but still not great. Oh btw at the beginnin of the year I had started working out. 2 weeks before school ended, I decided f*** it, Im gonna have some fun- i got all restless, didnt care about girls, just having fun. I chilled with my friends, and suddenly, my fear about talking to girls disappeared miraculously. Now, I'm a lot better off than before. When those 2 weeks started, my whole ideology changed. My story up to now is probably missing little bits here and there, but either way it's not the moral of the story.
II. What I learned.
a. On being alpha
As i mentioned before, I was tall so no one would pick on me, but in personality i was the most un-alpha piece of crAp you could see. I would constantly apologize, it was pathetic. During the year, I tried to be alpha, but it came from nowhere. It's now that i realize it's not a bunch of insults that make the alpha, its the attitude. And that attitude is not a hostile or jerk attitude. It's the optimistic attitude of someone who is loving life, wants to experience it to its fullest, and does not take disrespect because he respects himself above all others. An alpha male is a man whos biggest priority is self improvement and lets no one get in his way. He is destined for greatness, destined to leave others who try to lower him to their level in the dust. He is constantly trying to improve himself. He has finally reached his standards, his goals? He makes new ones to constantly keep changing. The alpha male is the essence of change. When you have reached this point, women are no longer the objective. Hell im talking like ive learned so much, while im only 15. I have only started. What i'm saying, is that while I still would like to bang women, I personally only do so when I fancy it. I now look at women as another aspect of self improvement, and while they interest me, I do not depend on them. Right now, at the age of 15, I have reached the following levels:
- I program video games on flash.
- I work on art.
- I have gone, in one year, from barely running 1/2 a mile to 5 at an average of 8 mins a mile.
- I have taken up piano and have learnt in one year what my teacher says takes three.
- One year ago, I would do 20 pushups on the wall(no joke). I now do 115 on the ground.
- I could barely do 15 crunches before( pathetic, eh). I now do 150 with 17.5 pounds.
- I could swim maybe 3 laps. I swim 120.
- I lifted with 5 pounders. I now do the same reps with 35 pounds.
- I make music on my computer.
- I play chess constantly.
- this week i went out 8 times with the guys. Until then, I think my max was two.
- Five girls are hitting on me.
- I have a 95 average...
- I am independent to a certain extent- I was able to work to earn myself an amazing computer, and boy does it feel great.
All this, because I simply want to advance myself. I seek excellence, nothing else, and i let NOthing get in my way. I see my friend, and i feel bad. Sure, hes more social than me, but he is being pulled down into mediocrity. He has success with the ladies, but he has quit his guitar, he has quit sports, everything when he heard he was leaving. My point is, you members of sosuave, dont let yourselves get bogged down by "openers" and neg hits and all that crap. Im not asking you to forget about women, Im asking you to get into other things so you lose your desperation. This is harder than it seems. What I suggest, is to write down a list of goals, attainable goals, that you will work on and complete. Here are some categories you could write your goals in:
- Social : hang out more w/ girls guys, whatever...
- Personal: take up a new hobby, physical, intellectual....
- Physical: take up working out or a new sport like rock climbing
- Adventure: Im still working on this part, planning on taking a trip right before uni around the world, saving up already.
- Financial: here you could write a target income, haha mine is 100 a month, the life of a high schooler is so simple.
- Family/ Philanthropy: you could do some feel good stuff- be nice to some family members daily, be nice to some one on the street.
- Culture: Read a book. Read 2 books. Read a thousand. Read read read. When you;re older and are constantly invited to dinners or events, your personal knowledge will make you light up the room.
To make it brief, try to squeeze the marrow out of life as some guy said. Thank you sosuave, what is in this post is what you have taught me.
---Lone chicken
I have been here for about 1 year, I've noticed a huge change in myself and my outlook on life in that one year. I was a lurker like many, even though i had made an account, i barely posted...etc. However, at the end of this 1 year period, I' ve come up with some realizations. I'm going to first of all talk a bit about myself, and then what I have come to realize. You can skip to whatever part you would like, the main purpose of this article is for me to get all my thoughts down on one page.
I. Life story(abridged)
II. What I learned
I. Life story
In my school, a really small school, I was a bit the middle class, with a lot of hobbies. Not a super-nerd, not a jock. I would never get beaten up because I was tall, I would hang out with everybody ( quite a bit more with the nerds), yet I had no success with girls. Well let me rephrase that. I only got into girls last year. I had quite a few tell me I was cute, and typically, that I was nice. Those comments would flatter me. Don't worry, this post isn't gonna be about how i turned into a jerk or whatever, but basically, before, I was the type of nice guy that would garner no respect. But I didn't care, besides the girls, my friends respected me, etc... I didn't really have issues. However, I really wanted a girl. I was scared as hell of talking to one, though I stumbled on this site, same story as most I'm guessing. I spent a year looking at articles and taking in the wrong stuff. I was so insecure I would take comfort from other's failure stories (true) and get inspired by motivational articles. Meanwhile, my attitude would not change, and I would still lack the balls to approach. This site was not a resource, it was a security blanket. Then i got MSN messenger, a little late lol- like 2years after every one else. I was fulfilled, I thought i was finally going to get some girls, here was an unintimidating way to talk to them. However, soon this became my only way of talking to girls. I became addicted to MSN, it began taking from my hobbies. I did gain a little bit of confidence and some experience, and some girls started liking me, but this was liking me as friends. After a while i realized- this would not help me get some girls, it eliminates the whole eye contact/ kino aspect which makes a conversation implicitly sexual or whatever. My flirting with the girls was obvious and when i would do it, it wasnt really flirting- the conversation would get sexual but it would not hint to my sexuality. We were talking about sex but I wasn't really implying i was capable of it. Bottom line- MSN messenger was an improvement over my previous pretty bad state but still not great. Oh btw at the beginnin of the year I had started working out. 2 weeks before school ended, I decided f*** it, Im gonna have some fun- i got all restless, didnt care about girls, just having fun. I chilled with my friends, and suddenly, my fear about talking to girls disappeared miraculously. Now, I'm a lot better off than before. When those 2 weeks started, my whole ideology changed. My story up to now is probably missing little bits here and there, but either way it's not the moral of the story.
II. What I learned.
a. On being alpha
As i mentioned before, I was tall so no one would pick on me, but in personality i was the most un-alpha piece of crAp you could see. I would constantly apologize, it was pathetic. During the year, I tried to be alpha, but it came from nowhere. It's now that i realize it's not a bunch of insults that make the alpha, its the attitude. And that attitude is not a hostile or jerk attitude. It's the optimistic attitude of someone who is loving life, wants to experience it to its fullest, and does not take disrespect because he respects himself above all others. An alpha male is a man whos biggest priority is self improvement and lets no one get in his way. He is destined for greatness, destined to leave others who try to lower him to their level in the dust. He is constantly trying to improve himself. He has finally reached his standards, his goals? He makes new ones to constantly keep changing. The alpha male is the essence of change. When you have reached this point, women are no longer the objective. Hell im talking like ive learned so much, while im only 15. I have only started. What i'm saying, is that while I still would like to bang women, I personally only do so when I fancy it. I now look at women as another aspect of self improvement, and while they interest me, I do not depend on them. Right now, at the age of 15, I have reached the following levels:
- I program video games on flash.
- I work on art.
- I have gone, in one year, from barely running 1/2 a mile to 5 at an average of 8 mins a mile.
- I have taken up piano and have learnt in one year what my teacher says takes three.
- One year ago, I would do 20 pushups on the wall(no joke). I now do 115 on the ground.
- I could barely do 15 crunches before( pathetic, eh). I now do 150 with 17.5 pounds.
- I could swim maybe 3 laps. I swim 120.
- I lifted with 5 pounders. I now do the same reps with 35 pounds.
- I make music on my computer.
- I play chess constantly.
- this week i went out 8 times with the guys. Until then, I think my max was two.
- Five girls are hitting on me.
- I have a 95 average...
- I am independent to a certain extent- I was able to work to earn myself an amazing computer, and boy does it feel great.
All this, because I simply want to advance myself. I seek excellence, nothing else, and i let NOthing get in my way. I see my friend, and i feel bad. Sure, hes more social than me, but he is being pulled down into mediocrity. He has success with the ladies, but he has quit his guitar, he has quit sports, everything when he heard he was leaving. My point is, you members of sosuave, dont let yourselves get bogged down by "openers" and neg hits and all that crap. Im not asking you to forget about women, Im asking you to get into other things so you lose your desperation. This is harder than it seems. What I suggest, is to write down a list of goals, attainable goals, that you will work on and complete. Here are some categories you could write your goals in:
- Social : hang out more w/ girls guys, whatever...
- Personal: take up a new hobby, physical, intellectual....
- Physical: take up working out or a new sport like rock climbing
- Adventure: Im still working on this part, planning on taking a trip right before uni around the world, saving up already.
- Financial: here you could write a target income, haha mine is 100 a month, the life of a high schooler is so simple.
- Family/ Philanthropy: you could do some feel good stuff- be nice to some family members daily, be nice to some one on the street.
- Culture: Read a book. Read 2 books. Read a thousand. Read read read. When you;re older and are constantly invited to dinners or events, your personal knowledge will make you light up the room.
To make it brief, try to squeeze the marrow out of life as some guy said. Thank you sosuave, what is in this post is what you have taught me.
---Lone chicken
