I was accused of rape.

I've known of this place for a while but haven't signed up becuase I had nothing to say. But since monday 14th I've had a lot on my mind.

I met a girl in Febuary and she gave me her number quite happily and agreed it would be nice to meet up sometime. Sometime later I sent her a text message asking her to meet up and she said "oh that's a good idea luv blah blah blah" and other things to that extent.

So we met up, I didn't have any money, asked her if she did and she said yeah... Went to a job agency so I could hand in a form then went to a pub and she bought me a drink.

In there we talked for a bit, I was joking with her, teasing her, then I said "Have you ever been to the park?"

"A couple of times, why?"

"Cuz that's where we're going after this."

She was fine with that, then we kissed, she sat on my lap and I gave her a bit of a massage. I wasn't too into it, she didn't have a great body and was overweight, but I thought maybe her personality and sense of adventure would make up for it.

We went to the park, then I walked her up against a tree and we kissed a bit, then I undid her bra and she was happy with that, simply saying "Idon't think you opened it properly." I thought since I'd got her bra off I'd try her trousers, she didn't have a problem. At one point she said "Kiss me" So as a joke I got down on my knees and was about to kiss her there, but it wouldn't work out and I was pretty disgusted by her belly anyway.

At that point I was thinking "Hmm. maybe not..." but the we started touching again, so I got my **** out, she touched it and stroked it, then I tried to lift her up, she said "I don't think it will work like that." Then I put her down and said "Better put something on." She said "That's a good idea."

I took a condom out of my wallet and opened it, then tried to put it on, realised it was going the wrong way round, turned it around and put it on anyway, then realised that was a stupid thing to do. Took it off and threw it away.

Then she said, "Shouldn't we find a better place?"

I said yeah, and walked off to a better place with her following me.

Then I said "Take your cardigan off and sit on it..." which she did. Though she did say "Shouldn't we get to know eachother better first?"

I said "Listen, this isn't something we haven't done before, and we'll both enjoy it." or something pretty much like that, it was a while ago. She got down happily enough, and I got down beside her and undid her jeans again with her helping. THey wouldn't come off over her boots and I asked if I should take her boots off, she wasn't into that and said "Lets just do it the normal way." I said "Haven't you ever done it in another position?" "no." "So how do you know you don't like it?" "Maybe later, not here."

So I put on another condom and got over her and slid in like nothing. I thought that was pretty strange since my other girlfreind had to hold herself open. She was loose and it was really unsatifactory. so I pulled out and said again we should try another positon. "No... just the normal position." So I did that again, got bored again, then she said "I think you'll find you've fallen out."

I pulled the condom off and then straddled her stomach and said "Put your tits together etc..." to which she tried but couldn't. Then she jerked me off a bit, but suddenly she says "get off." quite firmly but still calm, so I do, turn round and see some guy on a hill and think "****, some perv's watching us." I said "Is it because there's a guy," "What guy?"

That confused me. Anyway, she pulled her clothes back up and they were covered in mud so I laughed a bit, it was a really surreal situation for me.

Then we walked back out the park and as we were parting ways she says "Okay, I'll see you later then." I go "Oh okay." and then go back to the pub to pick up the bag I forgot.

I walk the three miles home, read a book, put something in the over. Then the dogs start barking and there's a knock on the door, some police are there- "Are you _______?" "Yeah." "I'm arresting you for the rape of a young girl in the park blah blah blah."

So I go to the police station, have to strip off, get my blood taken, have pubes plucked, get my **** swabbed and five hours later eventually find out what I'm accused of. The girl lied in her statement so I make sure I get this across in the interview (I was picked up at 4 pm and interviewed at 12:30am). She claimed she was saying "no I don't want to" all the way through and I held her hands down (at one point I did, but not hard or for any great period of time and only because a woman had told me she liked being held down).

The thing is she said I forced her to have sex in the first location and only used one condom. They found the other condom and the stilleto heal prints from the second location and through CCTV pretty much verified my account as accurate. But that's not good enough, I have to stay in the ****ing cell overnight and in the end I leave at about five the next day, why? Because the girl has left the county with her family to go on a ****ing holiday (which she is still on seemingly, cause they haven't interviewed her yet).

Now I'm on bail for the 10th of May whilst this little ***** has already got what she wanted, and what does she face for wasting police time and having me in a cell for 24 hours and having my mobile phone, clothes, dna and wallet (with all my cash cards) taken. Nothing, because "wasting police time? Everyone wants that, if we followed all of those up we wouldn't be able to do anything else." Civil suit? My solicitor "Why, does she have money?" "Probably not but that's not the point!" "Well, it's very expensive..."

Has anyone else been in a situation like this or know how the **** I'm supposed to get back into trusting woman again? As I was arrested I wondered for a moment, "****, what if I really did it?" But the truth is, she doesn't even believe she's been raped. She's just getting back at me in a spiteful and malicious way because I didn't want to be some ugly girls ***** and pander to her even if she's looser than a thai ***** and a worse **** than a 80 year old nun.

I wish I couldn't be bitter, and too be honest I'm really not but it seems if a few things hadn't had gone my way (like sensibly using a fresh condom) I could be heading for a court case with my name all over the local papers and facing a life sentene. I'm only 19 and she's 18. What did I do wrong? I asked my solicitor what could I do in the future to stop it happening again, and he just said "Nothing."

I really need some help.

Well, now you will use the right head instead of like 70% of the rest of the guys on here that think with their smaller head.

How exactly am I supposed to know which girl is a head case and which girl is going to be fine with her own sexual desires?

In this community people go "Oh, the sooner the better, the longer you don't sleep with a girl the less likely anything will ever happen". Yet I'm also supposed to vet them?

To be honest I think I have learned something from this though. If this girl had been more attractive I doubt she would've made such a petty complaint because she'd have been more in control of herself and be psychologically more able to deal with the fact someone else will come along.

If I found her more attractive I would've been more amiable with her anyway and probably set up another meeting even if I wanted to see other girls too. There's a lesson for all of you guys, don't bother with people you don't want to deal with again. The only problem is, who do you know until you've tried?

Similar thing happened to one of my friends. I don't see how the story will help, but it's got a happy ending.

He and a girl got drunk at a party, went to one of the bedrooms, and started bonkin. Then her parents walk in on them (dunno how that happened). They scream a lil, and my buddy goes home. She, on the other hand, stays at the party and gets together with ANOTHER guy. Odd.

Anyway. Next moring my friends mom wakes him up and says the cops are there. So they take him to prison, where he spends the next few hours. Luckily he had 3 packs of smokes on him, so he was too busy sharing 'em to get a$$ raped. (He's from Zimbabwe, by the way. it's baaaad over there.) He also gets out on bail, and eventually goes to court. Only the third lawyer prosecuted him. (The first two said they won't take the case, cause there's not enough evidence.) ANd unluckily for him, the judge was the countryies leading women's rights activist. But since he was underage, he didn't stay in prison. They just took him there, put a bag over his head, and lashed till he passed out. (Terrible scars... terrible.)

And hey... good ending is that he's a free man.

Err... yeah... that's it.

That's ****ed up, not sure how true it is, but South Africa is a rough place so who knows.

Why did he go to court? Didn't they even bother charging him?

Women who falsely accuse men of a crime against them disgust me. The bad thing about this is that it is her word against yours...unless you manage to track down the guy that saw you. Don't forget to tell your lawyer about that guy and push for the police to try to find him.

You should not only offer to take a lie detector test, but INSIST on it relentlessly. That will help show those working on the case that you are innocent. They might try harder to find the guy if the believe you are innocent. Don't attempt to contact this girl in any way because it will look like you are trying to influence or intimidate her. If there is a law school around where you are they might represent people for free to train students. If you want to pursue a civil suit, then I'd start looking for representation there. You might also find a lawyer who volunteers to defend men's rights. You should search the internet for those kinds of resources for your area.

Yes, it's going to be hard for you to trust women after this. This is one of the risks of having one night stands with drunk girls or girls who you meet at bars. You don't really know them and never know if they are like this or not. All you can do is be more selective and use a three date rule...YOU don't put out until after the third date...for your OWN protection against this kind of thing.

Good luck...

I think they did. Just don't ask me for the details, I can't remember. But ss you said: This place is Fooked up.

Don't bang fat chicks.

This is way they say that no matter what happens in the end always leave on a good note.This is what coaches tell players, always walk her out ot the elevater. Even if you have no plans on seein her again always let them leave your presence in a peaceful happy mood, because 'hell has no fury like a woman scorned'

Originally posted by Wyldfire
Women who falsely accuse men of a crime against them disgust me. The bad thing about this is that it is her word against yours...unless you manage to track down the guy that saw you. Don't forget to tell your lawyer about that guy and push for the police to try to find him.

You should not only offer to take a lie detector test, but INSIST on it relentlessly. That will help show those working on the case that you are innocent. They might try harder to find the guy if the believe you are innocent. Don't attempt to contact this girl in any way because it will look like you are trying to influence or intimidate her. If there is a law school around where you are they might represent people for free to train students. If you want to pursue a civil suit, then I'd start looking for representation there. You might also find a lawyer who volunteers to defend men's rights. You should search the internet for those kinds of resources for your area.

Yes, it's going to be hard for you to trust women after this. This is one of the risks of having one night stands with drunk girls or girls who you meet at bars. You don't really know them and never know if they are like this or not. All you can do is be more selective and use a three date rule...YOU don't put out until after the third date...for your OWN protection against this kind of thing.

Good luck...

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Cheers, I live in the UK so we get a free soliciter anyway, but you're idea of looking for a guy who specialises in defending mens rights is appealing...

I really don't think it will go any further as CCTV shows her speaking to me after the alleged incident and there's pleanty of evidence showing she lied anyway. But always be prepared.

And yeah, don't bang fat chicks. That's funny, my girlfreind before her was absolutely beautiful but she was too clingy so I thought "I'll just shag whoever comes along for the physical side only..." Stupid me. So the ugliest girl I've ever slept with is the one that accuses me of rape, whilst my beautiful ex still wants me. Probably, if I had my mobile phone I might know.

Originally posted by Royal Elite
This is way they say that no matter what happens in the end always leave on a good note.This is what coaches tell players, always walk her out ot the elevater. Even if you have no plans on seein her again always let them leave your presence in a peaceful happy mood, because 'hell has no fury like a woman scorned'

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I must have missed that in my David D multicase. But yeah, I obvioulsy need to change my behaviour if it reaps this kind of fruit.

Wow. With rape, it's pretty much the exact opposite of the way the legal system is supposed to work. By that, I mean that you're guilty until proven innocent. Although there is nothing you can do about her accusing you of rape, the thing that any competent lawyer should be able to get you off on (if it ever even goes to trial, which I highly doubt) is the fact that she "forgot" about the second location and second condom. Victims of rape would rarely "forget" about something like that. However, just being cleared of the charges isn't going to be the end of it. A rape charge (even though it will be dismissed) makes whoever it was stuck on reek for a long time afterwards. Regardless of the fact that it was dropped (and people might assume that it was dropped because she was so ashamed that she couldn't press charges, which isn't that uncommon among rape victims) it is still going to show up on your record - arrested for sexual assault/rape.

I hate to sound so cavalier about it, but perhaps this should serve as a lesson to you. Don't try to sleep with a girl in a park on your first date, especially if it's some random girl you have just been talking to on the internet (which this situation sounds like it falls into the category of). I forget where, but there's some thread on this forum with a link to an article about some guy who went with a girl he'd never met before (except online) to a park, and ended up getting jumped by her 5 guy friends, who then proceeded to steal everything he had on him.

Another lesson: Don't try to sleep with everything that crosses your path. You weren't attracted to this girl, you shouldn't have tried to put it to her in the first place.

I wasn't too into it, she didn't have a great body and was overweight, but...

There should never be a "but". She's overweight. End of story. I mean, there are guys out there who love girls with extra padding - best of luck to them - but it doesn't sound like you're one of them. Don't ever lower your standards! See what happened when you did?

Good luck with the whole mess, keep us posted on what developments take place.

Oh, on a side note: Something like this once happened to me, also. I'd been seeing this girl for a while, and she apparently found out that I'd also slept with 2 of her roommates. We both went out one night to different places, and got drunk. I called her up, went over to the house she was renting, and knocked on the door. Her roommates were all there, which should have been some warning to me but wasn't... Her and I went back into her bedroom, had sex, and I left. Two days later, I got a call... "I just wanted you to know that I'm pressing charges for rape... what happened the other night?" I blew up at her, then called the police to find out what was going on. The police operator checked, and said she had no record of any police officer being dispatched to that street, let alone that house. Came to find out from one of her friends (who's also one of mine) that she made up the whole "pressing charges" thing because she had so much to drink she couldn't remember anything and was trying to get the story out of me. Needless to say, I didn't talk to the psycho again, and within 2 weeks she'd broken my windshield (she was the... 2nd girl, out of 3, to do so...)

Blah.

fat girls have issues that why i run from em'. a guy i know at work got into a similar situation, but he met the girl online , and guess what? she was a fat ***** too. this can happen to any guy, i guess you were just unlucky, my neighbours gangbang girls they meet online and havnt had rape accusations yet but i have a feeling thier time will come.

Crazy.

I haven't been charged so it's not public or on my record, except for a local record being kept that I've been arrested for this offence. It was just so strange how the police reacted to me, they were joking with me and they all kept asking me "Are you alright there?"

I cried because something like this had never happened to me before... It did ruin my week cause the day after I got out I had a gig and played well, and girls came up to me a lot more attractive then her and started talking to me and making conversation, but I just felt such a weight on me. I feel better now though.

Hopefully I'll have a few more gigs coming up soon, it's always best too look on and see the best side of everything.

Wow, man. No joke here, I am still going through just about the same stuff you are right now. Here's my story...

I had sex with a fat b!tch back when I was desperate. A couple months later, we did it again, but filmed it. WOW, what a stupid idea. Word got out about it, and soon, she was pressing charges. Rumors started going around that I was going to jail for a long time, and all this other crap. So I talked to my parents about it. The police came and got my computer, four, or so months later, I'm in cuffs. I spent just a night in jail, and I already broke down. When they brought the food in, I cried. Nasty, deteriated cheerios, two slices of bread, and milk, all on a brown plastic tray. It was on this day that I really got into religion. When you're in a tiny cell like that, God is all you can turn to.

So anyway, I got out, and 20 days later, I went to see the judge. Got off with Community Service, and no contact with Miss Piggy. I'm telling you man, do not **** with fat chicks, ever. Unless that's your thing, make sure you know them very well, and for the love of God, only have sex at your place. It will give you an aliby. She came to YOUR place, willingly.

Dude, even when I was super desperate I didn't resort to fat chicks. Just Ms. Palmela.

I'm glad you got this settled though. And remember:

"Fat chicks don't count."

These women should be prosecuted or fined for false allegations. And the law enforcement agency should be held responsible for false arrest. Just being arrested victimizes you. That's what they're trying to do really. This record stay on forever and can negatively affect you in employment and tarnish your reputation.

What sucks is women are vague about their desire to engage in sex anyway. And most women are passive and the guy has to be aggressive if he's ever going to be successful.

Well it's good that they can't easily convict innocent guys, but when it's her word (lie) against yours (truth), they could investigate without arresting you and they shouldn't keep permanent records of it. It should be treated like any of the other 1000's of bogus allegations the police receive. I know this is just wishful thinking, but it piss me off that just being a guy makes you vulnerable to this BS. Luckily I never been accused of that, but women have pulled a lot of other shyt on me. It's all thanks to the feminist system in place that I talked about before.

But let it be said ugly fat girls are avoided for a reason, it has little to do with being shallow.

I dont think this is real. How the hell would she know where you live?

Originally posted by Reach
I haven't been charged so it's not public or on my record, except for a local record being kept that I've been arrested for this offence.

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No, it's on your permanent record, which is availiable to any and all law enforcement officials (or any interested public party). There is no such thing as a "local record" in that sense. If you're arrested for rape, you've been charged with that offense, ipso facto. It's a permanent stain, whether she presses charges or not. If she doesn't, then the charge(s) are dropped. It doesn't change the fact that you've been charged with the crime.

How is it that you don't know this, considering it would have all been explained in quite some detail by the police during booking and processing?

Originally posted by diablo
No, it's on your permanent record, which is availiable to any and all law enforcement officials (or any interested public party). There is no such thing as a "local record" in that sense. If you're arrested for rape, you've been charged with that offense, ipso facto. It's a permanent stain, whether she presses charges or not. If she doesn't, then the charge(s) are dropped. It doesn't change the fact that you've been charged with the crime.

How is it that you don't know this, considering it would have all been explained in quite some detail by the police during booking and processing?

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diablo, he lives in the UK...the legal system could work differently as far as criminal records go. I have no idea...but just saying it's not the US legal system he's dealing with.