The way of the attention wh0re

Hi guys

Seeing as I have been used as: an emotional tampon, a sex toy, a backup boyfriend and anything else you can imagine by THE SAME WOMAN. I thought I should post some of the characteristics. I know this has been posted in the past, but case stories are always good and no AW is EXACTLY alike. In this case, the AW had a boyfriend.

She kept "breaking up" with him repeatedly only to cheat on him with me. She would tell me it's over with them and pretend me and her were going to get together, then she'd disappear for a week or so and be back with him. I realise I was an AFC with her, but we can still learn from my mistakes.

Signs she's an AW:

WARNING SIGN #1: She's gets angry easily
She get's pi$$ed off easily when you challenge her. (i.e. catch her out lying, or she senses you doubt her honesty).

WARNING SIGN #2: She will drop you at a moments noticeShe pretty much tells you to fvck off if you argue with her, like she doesn't need you. And will literally cut you out of her life. (Only to have you run back like a good little puppy). Also she will cancel on you at the last minute on occassion and lie about why she can't make it (this one was iwth her BF). She will dissapear for a week, and you won't hear from her.

WARNING SIGN #3: She forgives you WAY too easily.
Example: I had known her only two weeks, we'd spent some time together. I kiss her at my house, she says she doesn't know what to do because of her BF of 2 years. I OVER REACT and go AFC when she LJBF's me call her a liar, manipulator and say how I couldn't trust someone who would cheat on her BF (which she'd already admitted once). Basically I was a complete @sshole. She told me to fvck off forever (see sign #2 ).

Now if a chick had done that to me, called me names and been a total AFC. I would NEVER see her again, alarm bells would ring in my head and I would think "This chick's crazy! RUN!". Guess what? I call her up and appologise, and after about 20 min on the phone she "forgives me". Either because I was right about her , or because she want's the male attention and ass-kissing. Either way it's fvcked up.

WARNING SIGN #4: You get the feeling she's lying to you
Her reasons for not being able to see you, or canceling on you don't make sense. Or if they do make sense. She gives herself away. This AW would give herself away and say things like "I was at this party two weeks ago", when she was supposed to be with me. What was her excuse at the time, SHE HAD A %(*&# FUNERAL TO GO TO! Her BF's friend had comitted suicide. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!? Also she will lie in ways that she can't really get caught too easily, she will tell half-truths and twist things around when you challenge her.

WARNING SIGN #5: She has a troubled past/present
I used to think she was lying when she told me her mom used to swear at her and her parents where @ssholes. But then I found out it was true. If you hear stories of abusive ex boyfriends, or parents. WATCH OUT! Trouble at home leads her to seek comfort from other men.

WARNING SIGN #6: She is WAY too comfortable around men
She dances like a real slvt and flirts with other men easily. She talks with you openly about sex (which is a good thing) but never delivers. She also understands how men's minds works and uses this to use men. For example, this AW would tell me how she kissed one of her HOT friends at a club. And even told me she would have a threesome with me and her friend. Coincidentally I haven't seen or heard from her in two weeks.

WARNING SIGN #7: She keeps you isolated from her friends
I did meet her friends, but she would manipulate me so I wouldn't see them. Like she told me what a b!tch her one friend was. And told her FRIEND what an @sshole I was. So we both don't speak to each other. She likes to keep you in control and makes sure she has all her bases covered.

Hope this was informative. I could post a BILBE on this woman alone. So many things she's done or said.

Thanks for reading
NaturallySelected

Hah... yeah, I'd have to say those are pretty accurate. I just recently had an experience with a girl who was like this.

I knew her for about 3 years. She recently IM'ed me asking for me to help her out. (Funny, the only time she made an effort to talk to me is when she wanted something. i.e. Help on something, a favor.) I gave her the cold shoulder, told her to go figure it out herself, since she's a pretty smart girl.
Next day, I get an IM back saying how she thinks I've changed for the worse, and how I'm something I'm not, and how I'm fake. Needless to say, I wrote her what I consider a masterpiece of an E-mail, pretty much telling her I'm not her little *****, and I'll change into whatever I feel I should change into. (A DJ, of course! ) Of course, she got pissy, because I'm not being the person she wants me to be.

Ah well, f'ck 'em, right?

Originally posted by Skweints
Hah... yeah, I'd have to say those are pretty accurate. I just recently had an experience with a girl who was like this.

I knew her for about 3 years. She recently IM'ed me asking for me to help her out. (Funny, the only time she made an effort to talk to me is when she wanted something. i.e. Help on something, a favor.) I gave her the cold shoulder, told her to go figure it out herself, since she's a pretty smart girl.
Next day, I get an IM back saying how she thinks I've changed for the worse, and how I'm something I'm not, and how I'm fake. Needless to say, I wrote her what I consider a masterpiece of an E-mail, pretty much telling her I'm not her little *****, and I'll change into whatever I feel I should change into. (A DJ, of course! ) Of course, she got pissy, because I'm not being the person she wants me to be.

Ah well, f'ck 'em, right?

Click to expand...

Yeah I agree . And it is always the case that they only come to you when they need to. Normally e-mails are considered un-DJ but sounds like your one was brilliant! HAH! Don't you love the power you feel when you push em' away and their ego's take a hit?

I fell inlove with a girl with those #1-6 signs... #7.. Well, i never found out.

Wait a minute...

I never found out.. why?? Because she did isolate her friends! ****!... Ain't that a *****..

All tha posts here are so.. soo... true.. it's sad.

But i'm glad i found this site.

Tomorow, classes starts and i'm going to do my first cold approach.

Or first approach rather..

And hopefully it'll turn out better than my approach when I was 8.

One comment: There seems to be the sentiment that being an attention ***** is the woman's fault. Not so. It's your fault for giving her all the attention. Remember guys, don't get mad at women for mistreating you, get mad at yourself for allowing it to happen.

okay, i am RIGHT NOW in the middle of this situation... I fell in love with this attention ***** JUST before sosuave. i didnt give her any attention, and i played my cards right. I ignored her, talk to other girls, and everything. She got jealous, and she one day sat on my leg. this girl is so nice and beautiful she gets asked out at least twice per day. at LEAST. I didnt know if she genuinely liked me, or if she is just out for attention, because she talks with a lot of other guys, but she does stuff with me i've never seen her do with other guys.

Well, tomorrow i am going to ask her out for lunch- my first approach, a POPULAR cheerleader/attention *****. I dont consider myself to be anything extremely special, but i am gonna take the risk because MAYBE just MAYBE she's worth it... i mean, its funny because i see guys she flirts with, and she gives them all signs, and when they ask her out, she says no.... like she's ordering toppings on a pizza.

the signs i noticed that she does is:

she shows off her body to you, sayin she got a "fat stomach, legs... etc"

She will try to get your attention by tapping you on the shoulder/head

she will do something bad and smile at you.

she will talk to other guys, or try to get your attention when you're talkin with other girls/guys.

if you are standing, she will look in your direction, (like something behind you), but wont get eye contact just to know whether or not you're looking at her... something like a clock or doorway.

Originally posted by gregory
okay, i am RIGHT NOW in the middle of this situation... I fell in love with this attention ***** JUST before sosuave. i didnt give her any attention, and i played my cards right. I ignored her, talk to other girls, and everything. She got jealous, and she one day sat on my leg.

Click to expand...

\

The only way you get any play from a AW is jealousy, use it.
As soon as you sense her IL dropping, make her jealous.

lol ya that is true. but if u should only do that when she pushes. u push she pushes.

Yeah I agree . And it is always the case that they only come to you when they need to. Normally e-mails are considered un-DJ but sounds like your one was brilliant! HAH! Don't you love the power you feel when you push em' away and their ego's take a hit?

Click to expand...

Considering the situation, me being in Japan, and her being in the States, E-Mail was my only option. What I find most ironic, though, is that the way I act now is EXACTLY the type of guys she used to date back when I was her "best friend". She's definitely got a wake of drama trailing in her footsteps, and I simply got tired of it. But hey, if you want, I'll PM ya that e-mail I wrote her. My buddy (who told me about this site, and is one hell of a DJ himself) was even stunned by it.

Originally posted by A.J. Stanson
One comment: There seems to be the sentiment that being an attention ***** is the woman's fault. Not so. It's your fault for giving her all the attention. Remember guys, don't get mad at women for mistreating you, get mad at yourself for allowing it to happen.

Click to expand...

You're absolutely right... in a sense. However, it takes more than one guy to turn a woman into an attention *****. It's not necessarily "getting mad" at the woman, either. It's more like sternly putting her in her place or knocking her off her pedestal, and letting her know that you're not (or no longer) going to kiss her ass or let her use you to flaunt herself. I try to be as respectfully as I can at all times, even to those I do not like.

Originally posted by A.J. Stanson
One comment: There seems to be the sentiment that being an attention ***** is the woman's fault. Not so. It's your fault for giving her all the attention. Remember guys, don't get mad at women for mistreating you, get mad at yourself for allowing it to happen.

Click to expand...

I agree you shouldn't let it happen to you. But how can you not blame the woman for being an attentin wh0re? She chooses to be that way. I don't care what cr@p she in her life, that's no excuse. I have been burned plenty of times and you don't see me turning into an @sshole.

Besides the really good AW's can play with your emotions and mind-fvck you so much you don't even realise you're being played. I have been in the situation and you fool yourself into thinking everything is ok. Hell with the one I posted about, I always SUSPECTED she was with her BF every second weekend when she would vanish. But I never really BELIEVED it.

Then I found out the truth about a lot of her lies and the whole illusion was shattered. I promise you, it's scary the amount of lies you'll believe. The AW knows all the right buttons to push at the right times, she is in a lot of ways is like a DJ. EXCEPT she does all these things just to LEAD MEN ON. We push and pull, give attention and then pull away. But we do actually plan on dating her and making her our GF. AW's just use these tricks to hurt and use men. I hate them. NO excuse can make you that way, I have had my fair share of sh!t in my life and I still consider myself to be an acceptable human being.

The best way to deal with an AW woman exhibiting traits #1 Thru #7 is to not waste your time on said woman and concentrate on other women who aren't as fvcked up.

They're all fvcked up in one way or another, but this type of woman is high maintenance and will leave your head spinning trying to figure out how to deal with them - evidenced by all of the posts in this thread.

Originally posted by NaturallySelected
I agree you shouldn't let it happen to you. But how can you not blame the woman for being an attentin wh0re? She chooses to be that way. I don't care what cr@p she in her life, that's no excuse. I have been burned plenty of times and you don't see me turning into an @sshole.

Besides the really good AW's can play with your emotions and mind-fvck you so much you don't even realise you're being played. I have been in the situation and you fool yourself into thinking everything is ok. Hell with the one I posted about, I always SUSPECTED she was with her BF every second weekend when she would vanish. But I never really BELIEVED it.

Then I found out the truth about a lot of her lies and the whole illusion was shattered. I promise you, it's scary the amount of lies you'll believe. The AW knows all the right buttons to push at the right times, she is in a lot of ways is like a DJ. EXCEPT she does all these things just to LEAD MEN ON. We push and pull, give attention and then pull away. But we do actually plan on dating her and making her our GF. AW's just use these tricks to hurt and use men. I hate them. NO excuse can make you that way, I have had my fair share of sh!t in my life and I still consider myself to be an acceptable human being.

Click to expand...

Ok the really fuvked up attention *****s actually have personality disorders, things like Borderline Personality, Histrionic etc. They actually aren't female players, atleast they don't try to be. Here's the problem. They have been through so much fuvked up shiat in their life that their emotions are literally GONE!! They have coached themselves on how to ignore feelings good or bad because that's what brought about their manifestation into a attention w-hore in the first place.

There is only one way to defeat them..LOL That is to shatter their ego. They have the BIGGEST ego's in the world and you should know that AW's are only good as a fuvk buddy and nothing more. However even then you'll eventually fall for her and her lies, manipulation and drama will all come out then.

Trust me I just got out of a relationship with the bigges AW I've ever met. She actually has Borderline Personality Disorder. I found out recently that she's supposedly was raped 3 years ago, and she cuts herself. I would constantly break up with her and she would call me back crying for HOURS telling me how much I meant to her and how she couldn't imagine me out of her life. I kept the DJ game up with her for 5 months before I finally started to care for her. These girls will BRING YOU DOWN, I don't care if your the best player in the county, they'll get the best of you.


However you should take joy in knowing that its really nothing you did wrong unless you get totally AFC, in which case any girl would kick you to the curb, its the simple fact that they will continue to recycle through men as we do through toliet paper. They'll NEVER be happy.




PIMP

I'm sorry to hear about your experiences. I actually had a friend like that once. She would flirt with guys and come on really strong just to boost her own ego. A couple of years ago, she and I went out to the fair, and she was engaged at the time. I had just started dating my boyfriend. Some guy saw us and he obviously found me attractive because he said I was "hotter than hell." I was flattered but yet a little intimidated, so I just thanked him for the nice compliment. My friend suddenly starts flirting with him like mad, and she gets him to buy her dinner, so he followed us around for a while. He kept trying to talk to me, but I made it clear that I had a boyfriend already. My friend kept leading him on, though, and at the end of the day he asked for her number. The really bad thing was, she was ENGAGED and I kept wondering what her fiance would think if he knew what an AW she was.

I don't speak to her anymore. The only times she ever wanted to see me anyway was when her "cooler" friends were busy. And every time I called her she would make some excuse not to talk. And after seeing her behavior at the fair, I lost all respect for her.

Guys, I got burnt really badly by an AW and I didnt even get to sleep with her.

These were her characteristics:
1. hasn;t spoken to her father for 12 years
2. many male friends
3. ugly female friends
4. would always tell me about her male friends
5. every time I would burn her, she would call up, be nice and then I would come closer and she would burn me
6. her female friends are ugly
7. I was kept away from her female friends
8. she had poor excuses for not wanting to seem me

I can't understnad why she didn;t sleep with me. I had contact with her for 3 months and in that time she slept with a married guy from work and an ugly tosser who used her for sex.

Originally posted by NaturallySelected
I agree you shouldn't let it happen to you. But how can you not blame the woman for being an attentin wh0re? She chooses to be that way. I don't care what cr@p she in her life, that's no excuse. I have been burned plenty of times and you don't see me turning into an @sshole.

Besides the really good AW's can play with your emotions and mind-fvck you so much you don't even realise you're being played. I have been in the situation and you fool yourself into thinking everything is ok. Hell with the one I posted about, I always SUSPECTED she was with her BF every second weekend when she would vanish. But I never really BELIEVED it.

Then I found out the truth about a lot of her lies and the whole illusion was shattered. I promise you, it's scary the amount of lies you'll believe. The AW knows all the right buttons to push at the right times, she is in a lot of ways is like a DJ. EXCEPT she does all these things just to LEAD MEN ON. We push and pull, give attention and then pull away. But we do actually plan on dating her and making her our GF. AW's just use these tricks to hurt and use men. I hate them. NO excuse can make you that way, I have had my fair share of sh!t in my life and I still consider myself to be an acceptable human being.

Click to expand...

God, how these words ring true with me. I just got out of a relationship with a woman who displayed all 7 characteristics, and am still hurting pretty badly from it. Even though I'm an AFC, I believe that no matter who you are, you can always be played.

No problem

Guys, I got burnt really badly by an AW and I didnt even get to sleep with her.

These were her characteristics
1. hasn;t spoken to her father for 12 years
2. many male friends
3. ugly female friends
4. would always tell me about her male friends
5. every time I would burn her, she would call up, be nice and then I would come closer and she would burn me
6. her female friends are ugly
7. I was kept away from her female friends
8. she had poor excuses for not wanting to seem me

I can't understnad why she didn;t sleep with me. I had contact with her for 3 months and in that time she slept with a married guy from work and an ugly tosser who used her for sex.

Click to expand...

About number one. MOST aws have problems with their mom or dad. One of them is "responsible" for her awhorism. WHat she's trying to get from these guys she "hits on" is just attention,duh. This represents the love she never received from her dad or her mom.

Aws are experts in extracting your maximum attention, since that's what gives to her a "sense of existance". Everyone must pay attetntion to her (especially guys). She wanna be loved and DESIRED BY ALL. Her self steem is basically made by the others opinions about her.

Once she made you interested and conquered you, she lose interest (because she knows you like her) and goes to the next and next and so on. She wants to impress.

2. Many male friends - Usually those guys she calls "friends", slept with her at one moment. After that, she either keeps having sex with them (for the attention, cherish) or put them on the back burner (and keep using them just to boost her ego).

3. Ugly female friends- Aws are insecure and competitive. Hot girls close to her are dangerous. They'll steal the attention she'd receive from guys. Aws are really egocentric and envious.

4. Tell about her male friends - She wanna say that she's desired and that they like her.

5. Histrionic dramma queens - They dont wanna connect with people. They just want attention, nothing more (they get bored easily).

8. Excuses - They play a lot of guys at the same time. One of Aws I knew use to give out her number to guys she wasnt interested and when they called she would talk to them and later would go out spreading the news "he's my fan", "another guy in love with me".

I asked her why she gave her number, and she said "because I'm a classy woman, I'm educated".
And I said "for your "education" they're gonna call you"...Come on thats Bull$hit girl!

They're a waste of time. They can be fun, but with time they're gonna suck all of your energy and if you fight with her she's gonna "burn" your image. Be careful.

If you buy the book "emotional vampires" you're gonna know how to deal with them ESPECIALLY. Here you can find ways to deal with them, but if you read the book you'll be so skilled at detecting those "aws" that you'll be surprised.

I think the initial post is really accurate. well done.

Ive been getting upset about this attention ***** whos been around me, and i've made a conscious decision to completely cut her off. (did so i nthe past, but she kept coming onto me, and burning me when i tried anything).

She started *****ing to me about the guy shes been chasing(much to my surprise, cause she was all over me) So i basically told her off called her an annoying flirt and walked off. Shes been inviting me over to her birthday party, and trying to IM me to talk....i just dont respond. Boycotted her birthday last night and dont regret it one bit. She hasnt come over in about a month(she lives about 200 yards away), and i couldnt be happier.

Originally posted by NaturallySelected
I agree you shouldn't let it happen to you. But how can you not blame the woman for being an attentin wh0re? She chooses to be that way. I don't care what cr@p she in her life, that's no excuse. I have been burned plenty of times and you don't see me turning into an @sshole.

Besides the really good AW's can play with your emotions and mind-fvck you so much you don't even realise you're being played. I have been in the situation and you fool yourself into thinking everything is ok. Hell with the one I posted about, I always SUSPECTED she was with her BF every second weekend when she would vanish. But I never really BELIEVED it.

Then I found out the truth about a lot of her lies and the whole illusion was shattered. I promise you, it's scary the amount of lies you'll believe. The AW knows all the right buttons to push at the right times, she is in a lot of ways is like a DJ. EXCEPT she does all these things just to LEAD MEN ON. We push and pull, give attention and then pull away. But we do actually plan on dating her and making her our GF. AW's just use these tricks to hurt and use men. I hate them. NO excuse can make you that way, I have had my fair share of sh!t in my life and I still consider myself to be an acceptable human being.

Click to expand...

absolutely brilliant.very true words, and pretty much descibe what i feel about the whole attention *****s thing.

It is their fault for being the way they are. They sleep around so much , no one knows who they are trying to get jealous(cause they constantly do this to get their 'target's' attention or who they are interested in.... they complain about how all guys are jerks, and complain about the how guys have treated them bad...but the weird thing is they keep running back to them.

Thats their choice...they choose who they want to be, and who they want to be with. They, like everyone else, get EXACTLY what they deserve.

Cheers

my AW doesn't sleep around much - most of the AFCs in her fanclub have not slept with her.

What sort of guys do these AWs fall in love with? do they even fall in love or do they just move to the next guy?