dannyegg4575
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 7, 2007
- Messages
- 311
- Reaction score
- 11
I woke up this morning, I come to a realization. Many people come to this site, asking for help in getting the exes back.
I am no relationship expert, but I do act on logic. And here is what logic tells me. I'm sure that a lot of us are great guys here. We are here because we're way too good to our women, I think. However, let me ask you this question...
Of course it's different for everybody. so.. you have to sit down and really think about it.
Firstly, can you ever trust this person again? A woman dumps a guy only when she has someone else lined up. She does it because she thinks that the other guy on the other side of the fence is better. What happens is, she keeps you hanging on while she tests the waters with the other guy without telling you. So, while she convinced you that things are going great, she moved on emotionally already. Do you get it? Us guys, we don't do that. We are straight up and we just do it.
Given that is the case, picture yourself in that situation where she does come back. Seriously, can you imagine trusting her to not cheat on you again? Every time she's out, you’ll always have that haunting feeling and conscious thought of asking, “who’re you going out with?” What are you going to do? guys... you can't go back.
Secondly, when you were with her, you placed a trust between you two where you see her as someone pure. That's why when you made love to her, you are thinking you've made love to someone really special. The fact that she'd broken that trust, love making will never be the same again. In the back of your mind, she slept with someone else during your absense.
Thirdly, you need to understand that you are not a door mat. If she is to see you as a door mat, that will all you will ever be in her mind. You are a pushover that she can always come back to and reuse. That means that it's too easy to go with someone else and you empower to know that no matter, you will always be there for her should her next relationship with someone else fails. My question for you is, are you able to deal with this?
Fourth, this is something that you will have to deal with. If you are so sure she's the one, she's going to be the one. Someone you will be with for the rest of your life. Meaning, it will be 40+ years, if you're lucky she hasn't moved on already with someone else. Do you understand? Your relationship failed for a reason. It will continue to fail until you figure out what that problem is. It may not necessarily be you but it is vitally important to understand that you are also the culprit to your demise. Move on to the next one having given this lesson. 40+ years with someone you don't love is going to cost you dearly. Think about it.
Fifth, you're beating yourself up now because you're going through your garbage trying to find something that is already thrown in and consumed. You may think you need it back, but the mess you make is hardly worth it. You'll end up with a big mess.
-------------------
I remember the first time I was LJBF, it was crazy. I was like 22 and she was like 18. It was one crazy roller coaster I tell you. I cried my heart out for this chick. I rode the bus for an hour just to see her everyday. It was sweet and all but it seriously, means little. In our mind/heart, we think that's what women want, the truth is, it's not. ALL WOMEN have this problem... and it's that they are always seeking for something that is impossible to attain. They envisioned a rich prince charming would come and sweep them off their feet.
Whatever you do guys, don't be such a nice guy!!! If she had broken up with you, let her go. Let her decide if it was a right decision. She is not stupid... It doesn't matter what her parents say, or what her friends say. what matters is what her heart says. and her heart is where you will get to her. Think of the things you've done for her and how you encouraged her to grow. If she does come back, you then decide what you want to do with it. If she doesn't, at least you have your sanity by moving on with your life.
girls at the age of 14-27 are in general, stupid. They won't know what they've lost until it's gone. but they will continue to look for that one guy who is MR. Perfect. and by the time they're 30 or something and they still don't get that guy, they'll settle for anything.
Remember guys, girls don't get to choose. They are to be the ones chasing us, not the other way around. Because when they're all old and ugly, they either become feminists or they settle for anything. Use this time to look for something for yourself. Pursue your career rather than chase dreams.
I'll add more if something comes up... hope this helps...
I am no relationship expert, but I do act on logic. And here is what logic tells me. I'm sure that a lot of us are great guys here. We are here because we're way too good to our women, I think. However, let me ask you this question...
Of course it's different for everybody. so.. you have to sit down and really think about it.
Firstly, can you ever trust this person again? A woman dumps a guy only when she has someone else lined up. She does it because she thinks that the other guy on the other side of the fence is better. What happens is, she keeps you hanging on while she tests the waters with the other guy without telling you. So, while she convinced you that things are going great, she moved on emotionally already. Do you get it? Us guys, we don't do that. We are straight up and we just do it.
Given that is the case, picture yourself in that situation where she does come back. Seriously, can you imagine trusting her to not cheat on you again? Every time she's out, you’ll always have that haunting feeling and conscious thought of asking, “who’re you going out with?” What are you going to do? guys... you can't go back.
Secondly, when you were with her, you placed a trust between you two where you see her as someone pure. That's why when you made love to her, you are thinking you've made love to someone really special. The fact that she'd broken that trust, love making will never be the same again. In the back of your mind, she slept with someone else during your absense.
Thirdly, you need to understand that you are not a door mat. If she is to see you as a door mat, that will all you will ever be in her mind. You are a pushover that she can always come back to and reuse. That means that it's too easy to go with someone else and you empower to know that no matter, you will always be there for her should her next relationship with someone else fails. My question for you is, are you able to deal with this?
Fourth, this is something that you will have to deal with. If you are so sure she's the one, she's going to be the one. Someone you will be with for the rest of your life. Meaning, it will be 40+ years, if you're lucky she hasn't moved on already with someone else. Do you understand? Your relationship failed for a reason. It will continue to fail until you figure out what that problem is. It may not necessarily be you but it is vitally important to understand that you are also the culprit to your demise. Move on to the next one having given this lesson. 40+ years with someone you don't love is going to cost you dearly. Think about it.
Fifth, you're beating yourself up now because you're going through your garbage trying to find something that is already thrown in and consumed. You may think you need it back, but the mess you make is hardly worth it. You'll end up with a big mess.
-------------------
I remember the first time I was LJBF, it was crazy. I was like 22 and she was like 18. It was one crazy roller coaster I tell you. I cried my heart out for this chick. I rode the bus for an hour just to see her everyday. It was sweet and all but it seriously, means little. In our mind/heart, we think that's what women want, the truth is, it's not. ALL WOMEN have this problem... and it's that they are always seeking for something that is impossible to attain. They envisioned a rich prince charming would come and sweep them off their feet.
Whatever you do guys, don't be such a nice guy!!! If she had broken up with you, let her go. Let her decide if it was a right decision. She is not stupid... It doesn't matter what her parents say, or what her friends say. what matters is what her heart says. and her heart is where you will get to her. Think of the things you've done for her and how you encouraged her to grow. If she does come back, you then decide what you want to do with it. If she doesn't, at least you have your sanity by moving on with your life.
girls at the age of 14-27 are in general, stupid. They won't know what they've lost until it's gone. but they will continue to look for that one guy who is MR. Perfect. and by the time they're 30 or something and they still don't get that guy, they'll settle for anything.
Remember guys, girls don't get to choose. They are to be the ones chasing us, not the other way around. Because when they're all old and ugly, they either become feminists or they settle for anything. Use this time to look for something for yourself. Pursue your career rather than chase dreams.
I'll add more if something comes up... hope this helps...
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