Can you critique my text convo quick? Any damage done?

Been out with this girl [27] a few times, but her interest level really spiked after our date on Friday. Friday she didn't know if she was seeing her friends on Vday or staying in, so today I initiated this conversation. This part of the convo comes in after I said Happy Vday and she told me about her weekend. Started around 5pm and concluded around 10:30pm (I was slow to respond to half of her texts)

ME: If you stay in tonight and feel like grabbing ice cream later, give me a shout.
HER: Cool actually i'm just grabbing pizza and a movie.
ME: Pizza here too. Yum
HER: You should have waited for me!
HER: What kind?
ME: Lol next time I will. Made it myself, u?
HER: You did? Wow! You mean you just put it in the oven? ha ha. I didn't get anything just went home
ME: Made it all. What never met a man who could cook? hehe. That sucks, hope you got a good movie at least
HER: Wow Impressive!
ME: Would've brought ya some if I knew
HER: It's ok I will settle on dessert. lol jk
ME: Too bad your j/k i've got some chocolate ice cream i'm about to open
HER: Oh yumm!
HER (an hour later): Still waiting on that ice cream!
Me: Dont know where ya live to bring it
HER: Excuses Excuses!
ME: Give me directions, maybe you'll see

She didn't respond and I'm not sure what to think. If she was playing text games, just didn't feel like hanging out, I scared her off, or am just over-thinking. What do you think?

I don't like the opening line, not ****y enough, kinda AFC

First of all, had you banged her prior to this text convo?

Saying Happy Vday to a girl you haven't even banged is stupid.

It would have been better to simply lie low and not contact her at all on this day and let her wonder...

bilboteabaggins said:

I don't like the opening line, not ****y enough, kinda AFC

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I agree. Judge a girl by her actions, not her words (or texts). Did she give directions to her place? By the end she knew you didn't have anything else happening, and she had you where she wanted you...under her control.

Important not to fall into the trap of texting a girl too much, but easy to do. We've all done it.

If your texts are as long or longer than hers (as some of yours were) you are doing it wrong!

If you respond to every one of her texts you are doing it wrong!


Here's a better example of a text convo. Keeping it brief and not always responding. Assuming she texted first:

ME: What's up? I'm pretty busy tonight, your plans?
HER: Cool actually i'm just grabbing pizza and a movie.
ME: Pizza here too. Home cooked [don't say by who]
HER: You should have waited for me!
ME: [No answer]
HER: What kind? Did you cook it?
ME: Pretty tasty. Ham and pineapple.
HER: You did? Wow! You mean you just put it in the oven? ha ha. I didn't get anything just went home
ME: [No answer]
HER: It's ok I will settle on dessert. lol jk
ME: Chocolate ice cream.
HER: Oh yumm!
HER (an hour later): Still waiting on that ice cream!
Me: [No response since it is getting late and you are "busy with other stuff"]
HER: ?
ME: [next morning] Yeah, that ice cream sure was tasty. What a crazy night. Let's meet up Thursday night


Words mean nothing - focus on her actions as they are all that matter

the_stig said:

Been out with this girl [27] a few times, but her interest level really spiked after our date on Friday.

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Well my first question would be....has there been any sexual contact between you two?


You said that she's been on several dates with you,so have you two kissed,fooled around a bit,or anything? Because that's the REAL DEAL.


That itself,plus the fact she's been on multiple dates with you is more of an indicator of her interest than her not responding to ONE TEXT you sent.

Started around 5pm and concluded around 10:30pm.

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5 and a 1/2 hours????? That's how long this texting session went on?

Don't you think that's a bit much? You think she may have not responded to your last text because of something you might have done wrong,but to me,I think it might have been out of sheer exhaustion.


I just think her fingers needed a rest,lol.

the_stig said:

ME: If you stay in tonight and feel like grabbing ice cream later, give me a shout.
HER: Cool actually i'm just grabbing pizza and a movie.
ME: Pizza here too. Yum
HER: You should have waited for me!
HER: What kind?
ME: Lol next time I will. Made it myself, u?
HER: You did? Wow! You mean you just put it in the oven? ha ha. I didn't get anything just went home
ME: Made it all. What never met a man who could cook? hehe. That sucks, hope you got a good movie at least
HER: Wow Impressive!
ME: Would've brought ya some if I knew
HER: It's ok I will settle on dessert. lol jk
ME: Too bad your j/k i've got some chocolate ice cream i'm about to open
HER: Oh yumm!
HER (an hour later): Still waiting on that ice cream!
Me: Dont know where ya live to bring it
HER: Excuses Excuses!
ME: Give me directions, maybe you'll see



She didn't respond and I'm not sure what to think.

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Don't freak out over this. I still think she may have just been tired over the texting going on so long for one,but asking for directions to her house.....well....I'm with you on this. I think the texting was just for texting sake. I don't believe she was really looking for any "action" that night. I don't think she wanted you to really go over to her house.

I scared her off, or am just over-thinking. What do you think?

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I don't think you "scared" her off,if anything you tired her out and BORED her out.


There was no ATTRACTION in the convo WHATSOEVER,it was all comfort.

There was no flirting,romantic talk,compliments,or anything sexual in it.

You need to watch that because if you don't,you run risk of getting friendzoned.


I don't think she was frightened,it's that the convo was just too long and void of any romantic excitement.

Thanks for the response guys, that's the kind of feed back i'm looking for. Haven't banged yet, nothing really physical after two dates except hugs and a little kino. Both instances in the convo where she sent back to back texts is when I didn't reply. I agree with the amended convo, but I was trying to score a date with her, but felt like I came off as too desperate in the process. Would you agree it'd be best if I backed off for a few days now, or waiting for her to initiate? Next time we do text, i'll definitely be spicing it up.

the_stig said:

Thanks for the response guys, that's the kind of feed back i'm looking for. Haven't banged yet, nothing really physical after two dates except hugs and a little kino. Both instances in the convo where she sent back to back texts is when I didn't reply. I agree with the amended convo, but I was trying to score a date with her, but felt like I came off as too desperate in the process. Would you agree it'd be best if I backed off for a few days now, or waiting for her to initiate? Next time we do text, i'll definitely be spicing it up.

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Based on what happened in the first 2 dates and this exchange, you need to take action to avoid the friendzone...fast!

Suggest a time to meet up in a few days and avoid text contact otherwise.

And when you do meet up, make sure to escalate. Heavy make out minimum.

If she flakes or won't meet up, chalk it up as a learning experience.

The texting wasn't horrible as far as texting goes. The problem was that it's still texting. This conversation would have been great over the phone and would have taken about 5 mins. Then the rest of the time she wouldn't know what you were doing, leaving it to her imagination, which creates mystery. When you were texting she knew exactly what you were up to during your whole evening and when you asked to come over she felt she didn't even need to bother trying to get you, because she had your attention the whole evening. She OWNED your evening, it was all about her. In a phonecall she would've owned 5 minutes of your time which she would feel lucky to have had. Be scarce.

Note that you can be extremely sweet and charming as you want in the phone conversation, yet you'll still come off as non needy cause it was for such or short amount of time. Treat your time as a gift. Overflowing a girl you just starting seeing with gifts will make her lose respect. Giving her a flower you picked on your way over makes her tingly.

It's probably not over yet. She might still be interested to some degree. Just remember this for next time and LET HER CONTACT YOU FIRST. This shows that her not answering your text may have made you lose interest and attention, so she'll learn not to behave that way again. You HAVE to condition girls on how they should behave around you.

the_stig said:

Friday she didn't know if she was seeing her friends on Vday or staying in...

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Hmm... something doesn't feel quite right. Women tend to know exactly what they're doing on those "important" days... my spider-sense is tingling... could there be a BF in the background?

so today I initiated this conversation.

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And therein lies the failure. Let the women come to you!

Now dude, please take no offense but the whole convo made me cringe. It sounded like two girlfriends talking about their day. No spice. No sexual tension. No "oomph."

She didn't respond and I'm not sure what to think. If she was playing text games, just didn't feel like hanging out, I scared her off, or am just over-thinking. What do you think?

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Dude, you gotta have more of an edge with your conversations (which also applies to texting, which in my opinion, should be kept to a minimum).

This girl I recently granted exclusivity to asked me yesterday "So, what are you doing after this?" I came back with "Oh, I gotta go see my wife! It is Valentine's Day after all..." with a big wink and a smile.

She just coyly giggled.

A - I'd never offer to get ice cream with a girl. And I'd never give the caveat "If you're staying in tonight". If your dates aren't worthy of her breaking other plans, then your dates are no good (whether she's staying in or not). It just sounds like, "If you don't have anything better to do, let's get ice cream together as your emergency backup plan"

B - I HATE the back and forth text conversation. HATE it. Always will. That whole string of texts could have ended with 2 messages.

You: Hey. Staying warm over there? Let's catch up tonight. Grab drinks, etc.

Her: Staying in tonight. I got pizza, blah blah.

Right THERE she had the chance to invite you over for pizza OR to reschedule another date. She did neither. So there's no need to continue the conversation by asking what kind of pizza, or any of that other high school stuff. At very most you could have sent one more text saying:

You: Enjoy. Well, I'll catch you around some other time.

Look at it this way: if you're going to be in a constant state of communication, you might as well just f**kin move in together. And just imagine how exciting that is.....always talking. Always knowing where each other is. Never any drop of mystery or even curiosity about what's happening in each other's lives.

Doesn't that just make you tingle with excitement? No? Me either

I find texting weak anymore. But i guess its the new thing. I got a friend that said he texted over 6000 times last month.

TizZle said:

I find texting weak anymore. But i guess its the new thing. I got a friend that said he texted over 6000 times last month.

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Not sure about your friend, but I've got better sh*t to do than hold a tiny ass piece of expensive plastic and punch out little cutesy messages to some chick when all I have to do is call her, meet up, and bang.

CONSTANT TEXTING IS FOR WOMEN.

HER (an hour later): Still waiting on that ice cream!
ME: You're going to be waiting a while.
HER: <33333
ME: 8======>

By not replying to your last text line she got the upper hand. Never let that happen again. I basically agree with all the others' comments. Moving forward, don't initiate contact with her from this point on, even if it goes on without any contact for a few weeks; let her come to you and if she doesn't than so be it.

francoatgrex said:

By not replying to your last text line she got the upper hand. Never let that happen again. I basically agree with all the others' comments. Moving forward, don't initiate contact with her from this point on, even if it goes on without any contact for a few weeks; let her come to you and if she doesn't than so be it.

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Quick sit-rap.. she texted me the next morning with something like "haha I fell asleep! Shoot!" to which I didn't reply. We'll see if I hear from her. She is very conservative which I feel is why we're off to a slow start. Within a few minutes of our 2nd date ending friday she texted and said 'you seem like a really great guy', then again right away on Sat, so I know the IL is there.

Damage points: 0.01
Reason: Analyzing Text

the_stig said:

Been out with this girl [27] a few times, but her interest level really spiked after our date on Friday. Friday she didn't know if she was seeing her friends on Vday or staying in, so today I initiated this conversation. This part of the convo comes in after I said Happy Vday and she told me about her weekend. Started around 5pm and concluded around 10:30pm (I was slow to respond to half of her texts)

ME: If you stay in tonight and feel like grabbing ice cream later, give me a shout.
HER: Cool actually i'm just grabbing pizza and a movie.
ME: Pizza here too. Yum
HER: You should have waited for me!
HER: What kind?
ME: Lol next time I will. Made it myself, u?
HER: You did? Wow! You mean you just put it in the oven? ha ha. I didn't get anything just went home
ME: Made it all. What never met a man who could cook? hehe. That sucks, hope you got a good movie at least
HER: Wow Impressive!
ME: Would've brought ya some if I knew
HER: It's ok I will settle on dessert. lol jk
ME: Too bad your j/k i've got some chocolate ice cream i'm about to open
HER: Oh yumm!
HER (an hour later): Still waiting on that ice cream!
Me: Dont know where ya live to bring it
HER: Excuses Excuses!
ME: Give me directions, maybe you'll see

She didn't respond and I'm not sure what to think. If she was playing text games, just didn't feel like hanging out, I scared her off, or am just over-thinking. What do you think?

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she probably hadn't wax her legs/pu ssy that evening and didn't want you acually showing up to her in joggings?

thats most likely



(not to op)
some guys that answered the thread ae sooo tripping on the silent treatment button!
relax already. A guy that gets hurt and ÒBVIOUSLY starts soacking because of an unreplied text, i find him childish and quite feminine...

ha ha you guys must be fatties with the 20 messages back and forth about pizza and ice cream. For my entertainment I would have thrown a slice of pizza between you two than watch you fight over it like a pack of hyenas.

But seriously, you should have cut it off after the second message and been like ' come on over' and thats it. Keep it short and simple. if shes down ,she'll come. if not, you didnt waste time talking about ****ty food.