The real reason why females will always be at an advantage

An original story by Francisco...

*Sigh*

I really got a lot to do today, but I just can't let Keto slide on this one. It really irks me that some noob might read this thread and end up agreeing with this terribly weak perspective.

Every thread on this forunm just about exemplifies women asserting their advantages

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That's because most of the dude's that post here are AFCs... DUH. You should rename your title bro.

"Reasons why women will always have the advantage...over CHUMPS."

What advantage do men as a group have?

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Are you HIGH? There are tons of advantages and reasons I LOVE being a man

Here are my Top 10:

1. We age better and are still attractive to women well into our 50's 60's and beyond. Look at guys like Sean Connery, Clint Eastwood or George Clooney.. HOT 20 year old chicks think they are sexy! With the exception of genetic freaks like Demi Moore and maybe Angela Basset (always had a crush on her) most women look TERRIBLE past 40, like their whole body just said 'Fukk it'.

2. We are not slaves to our emotions. This is one of the big ones because it empowers us to take control of situations instead of vice-versa. REASON and LOGIC are the greatest gifts bestowed on us by nature.

3. We are not slaves to our vanity. Put a man and a woman in the bathroom and see how long it takes them both to shower and get ready. Who is more insecure and concerned about how people see them?

4. We have thicker skins and work better under pressure. Ever wonder why all the top chefs in the world are men when your grandma cooked so good? It's because women are not energetically built to handle serving 100 people at once... it's too much for them!

5. We are aggresive and creative at the same time, which is why it is MEN that built everything around us, from the chair you are sitting on, to the walls around you, to the computer you are using to post this gay sh!t

6. We LEAD. Women FOLLOW. Despite all the Feminist agendas, the top paying jobs in the world belong to men and the people who run this planet is one giant boys club. Sure there are some lady players out there.. you got the Condoleezas and the Hillary's.. but that's like what, under 1%?? Oh noes!!! They are taking over!!!!!

7. We are not worried about being perceived as wh0res. Even in this, the pinnacle of sexual revolution, women still roll with the anti-slut defense.. despite their 'liberation' that sh!t is hardcoded in their DNA. No self-respecting girl wants to look like a hoe, even to her closest friends. Men, OTOH, get nothing but props and high fives for being the dirty dogs that we are.

8. We don't put up with the BS women do. It never ceases to amaze me how a girl will silently stew in her own misery for YEARS and you would never know it because they convince themselves that everything is fine. Both sexes are guilty of this, but women take delusional to another level.

9. We whip women's ass at basketball. You ever watch the WNBA?? I thought so... that's my point.

10. We pee standing up! You may laugh but I see this gesture as the perfect analogy for who we are. We are the ones that stand up.. we are the ones that mark our territory and are willing to fight and even KILL for it if need be. Women are only willing to fight each other to find that kind of security in a man. Plus, that toilet seat gets awful cold in the winter

Now look at that wonderful list and compare it to yours.

1. Women have pvssies (Totally ignoring the fact that they want d!ck too)

2. Women are more social (They actually are because they never STFU..god bless em)

3. Women don't have to approach (This is an advantage for lazy people)

Though your reasoning seems weak to me on the surface I am willing to give you the benefit of the doubt here. Please tell us ketosix, all personal differences aside - how exactly has this mentality of women having all the advantages actually helped you succeed? And how successful are you with women to be even making this kind of assessment?

With all due respect, women choose too. There's nothing stopping a woman from taking initiative.

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You are so right man! There isn't anything stopping them at all!! But for some reason most (especially the hot ones) never do. No matter how much a girl fancies a guy, she always waits for him to step up and fulfill his role as a man. What a torturous existence this must be... waiting for a MAN to show up in a world of AFCs. You may envy women and their 'advantages', but TBH, I actually feel sorry for them.

Women do choose, but only what's handed to them. I'd much rather choose whatever looks good to me.

The only difference is whther she takes initiative or not she'll have a higher succes rate either way.

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Your problem is that you equate success with getting laid. And you are right, if you're a man! Women do not have the same idea of success though - for them it's meeting someone who pushes all the right emotional buttons, gets them worked up enough to fukk and will eventually commit to them. They want the connection more than they want the sex. Do you have any idea how much more difficult it is to connect than it is to copulate? People fukk all the time, but how many of them have real chemistry and were 'meant to be'? It's about as likely as hitting the lottery

The path to our satisfaction is so much simpler and practical than theirs. In this respect, men come out on top once again.

Now I realize that you are not alone in your sentiments and on a board whose majority is built of weak, frustrated men you will get plenty of support...

thedeparted said:

I think ketostix is right. He took the red pill on this one.

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But taking the pill is not enough! In fact it requires very little effort.

The traitor in that movie also took the red pill, but what did he do with that knowledge? Knowing is not enough.. being aware of the odds stacked against you is NOT ENOUGH. We need the strength and faith to overcome these odds and I'm sorry but believing that your opposition has all the advantages is not the path to victory.

Guys don't want to face the reality, because it's depressing. But they're living in the matrix.

Click to expand...

Ugh.. more of this Matrix crap..DAMN YOU LMS!!!! :cuss:

I will humor this tired analogy one more time...

Reality is what YOU make of it. That's the real message behind the Matrix. In that movie, all the characters were scared sh!tless of the sentinels. "They can bend time and space.. they have all the advantages!!" Sound familiar?

Humanity was doomed till Neo showed up and was like "Advantages Schmadvantages... watch this sh*t!!" He was only able to do this once he realized he had a purpose, a cause worth dying for. He flipped it on the sentinels when he finally realized his potential and let the taps off his personal power.

Now, do you think the movie would have had the same ending if ketostix was in Neo's shoes? No freaking way! He woulda ran off and shacked up with Trinity, feeling totally lucky that one of these female goddesses with all the advantages in the universe would actually grant him access to her golden vagina.

No other way to explain the pvzzy-whipped fools I see walking around every day, who will let their wife walk all over them, disrespect them, spend all their money on garbage, and they say she is their best friend.

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Sure there is. It's called IGNORANCE and LACK OF SELF-WORTH. The same elements that fuels guys to believe that their entire gender is at the mercy of another and punani is actually a rare mineral that must be mined with great care.

Señor Fingers said:

*Sigh*

I really got a lot to do today, but I just can't let Keto slide on this one. It really irks me that some noob might read this thread and end up agreeing with this terribly weak perspective.



That's because most of the dude's that post here are AFCs... DUH. You should rename your title bro.

"Reasons why women will always have the advantage...over CHUMPS."



Are you HIGH? There are tons of advantages and reasons I LOVE being a man

Here are my Top 10:

1. We age better and are still attractive to women well into our 50's 60's and beyond. Look at guys like Sean Connery, Clint Eastwood or George Clooney.. HOT 20 year old chicks think they are sexy! With the exception of genetic freaks like Demi Moore and maybe Angela Basset (always had a crush on her) most women look TERRIBLE past 40, like their whole body just said 'Fukk it'.

2. We are not slaves to our emotions. This is one of the big ones because it empowers us to take control of situations instead of vice-versa. REASON and LOGIC are the greatest gifts bestowed on us by nature.

3. We are not slaves to our vanity. Put a man and a woman in the bathroom and see how long it takes them both to shower and get ready. Who is more insecure and concerned about how people see them?

4. We have thicker skins and work better under pressure. Ever wonder why all the top chefs in the world are men when your grandma cooked so good? It's because women are not energetically built to handle serving 100 people at once... it's too much for them!

5. We are aggresive and creative at the same time, which is why it is MEN that built everything around us, from the chair you are sitting on, to the walls around you, to the computer you are using to post this gay sh!t

6. We LEAD. Women FOLLOW. Despite all the Feminist agendas, the top paying jobs in the world belong to men and the people who run this planet is one giant boys club. Sure there are some lady players out there.. you got the Condoleezas and the Hillary's.. but that's like what, under 1%?? Oh noes!!! They are taking over!!!!!

7. We are not worried about being perceived as wh0res. Even in this, the pinnacle of sexual revolution, women still roll with the anti-slut defense.. despite their 'liberation' that sh!t is hardcoded in their DNA. No self-respecting girl wants to look like a hoe, even to her closest friends. Men, OTOH, get nothing but props and high fives for being the dirty dogs that we are.

8. We don't put up with the BS women do. It never ceases to amaze me how a girl will silently stew in her own misery for YEARS and you would never know it because they convince themselves that everything is fine. Both sexes are guilty of this, but women take delusional to another level.

9. We whip women's ass at basketball. You ever watch the WNBA?? I thought so... that's my point.

10. We pee standing up! You may laugh but I see this gesture as the perfect analogy for who we are. We are the ones that stand up.. we are the ones that mark our territory and are willing to fight and even KILL for it if need be. Women are only willing to fight each other to find that kind of security in a man. Plus, that toilet seat gets awful cold in the winter

Now look at that wonderful list and compare it to yours.

1. Women have pvssies (Totally ignoring the fact that they want d!ck too)

2. Women are more social (They actually are because they never STFU..god bless em)

3. Women don't have to approach (This is an advantage for lazy people)

Though your reasoning seems weak to me on the surface I am willing to give you the benefit of the doubt here. Please tell us ketosix, all personal differences aside - how exactly has this mentality of women having all the advantages actually helped you succeed? And how successful are you with women to be even making this kind of assessment?



You are so right man! There isn't anything stopping them at all!! But for some reason most (especially the hot ones) never do. No matter how much a girl fancies a guy, she always waits for him to step up and fulfill his role as a man. What a torturous existence this must be... waiting for a MAN to show up in a world of AFCs. You may envy women and their 'advantages', but TBH, I actually feel sorry for them.

Women do choose, but only what's handed to them. I'd much rather choose whatever looks good to me.



Your problem is that you equate success with getting laid. And you are right, if you're a man! Women do not have the same idea of success though - for them it's meeting someone who pushes all the right emotional buttons, gets them worked up enough to fukk and will eventually commit to them. They want the connection more than they want the sex. Do you have any idea how much more difficult it is to connect than it is to copulate? People fukk all the time, but how many of them have real chemistry and were 'meant to be'? It's about as likely as hitting the lottery

The path to our satisfaction is so much simpler and practical than theirs. In this respect, men come out on top once again.

Now I realize that you are not alone in your sentiments and on a board whose majority is built of weak, frustrated men you will get plenty of support...



But taking the pill is not enough! In fact it requires very little effort.

The traitor in that movie also took the red pill, but what did he do with that knowledge? Knowing is not enough.. being aware of the odds stacked against you is NOT ENOUGH. We need the strength and faith to overcome these odds and I'm sorry but believing that your opposition has all the advantages is not the path to victory.



Ugh.. more of this Matrix crap..DAMN YOU LMS!!!! :cuss:

I will humor this tired analogy one more time...

Reality is what YOU make of it. That's the real message behind the Matrix. In that movie, all the characters were scared sh!tless of the sentinels. "They can bend time and space.. they have all the advantages!!" Sound familiar?

Humanity was doomed till Neo showed up and was like "Advantages Schmadvantages... watch this sh*t!!" He was only able to do this once he realized he had a purpose, a cause worth dying for. He flipped it on the sentinels when he finally realized his potential and let the taps off his personal power.

Now, do you think the movie would have had the same ending if ketostix was in Neo's shoes? No freaking way! He woulda ran off and shacked up with Trinity, feeling totally lucky that one of these female goddesses with all the advantages in the universe would actually grant him access to her golden vagina.



Sure there is. It's called IGNORANCE and LACK OF SELF-WORTH. The same elements that fuels guys to believe that their entire gender is at the mercy of another and punani is actually a rare mineral that must be mined with great care.

Click to expand...

Thank god a real man speaks!

Gives me hope...

Señor Fingers said:

*Sigh*

You are so right man! There isn't anything stopping them at all!! But for some reason most (especially the hot ones) never do. No matter how much a girl fancies a guy, she always waits for him to step up and fulfill his role as a man. What a torturous existence this must be... waiting for a MAN to show up in a world of AFCs. You may envy women and their 'advantages', but TBH, I actually feel sorry for them.

Women do choose, but only what's handed to them. I'd much rather choose whatever looks good to me.



Your problem is that you equate success with getting laid. And you are right, if you're a man! Women do not have the same idea of success though - for them it's meeting someone who pushes all the right emotional buttons, gets them worked up enough to fukk and will eventually commit to them. They want the connection more than they want the sex. Do you have any idea how much more difficult it is to connect than it is to copulate? People fukk all the time, but how many of them have real chemistry and were 'meant to be'? It's about as likely as hitting the lottery

The path to our satisfaction is so much simpler and practical than theirs. In this respect, men come out on top once again.

Now I realize that you are not alone in your sentiments and on a board whose majority is built of weak, frustrated men you will get plenty of support...



But taking the pill is not enough! In fact it requires very little effort.

The traitor in that movie also took the red pill, but what did he do with that knowledge? Knowing is not enough.. being aware of the odds stacked against you is NOT ENOUGH. We need the strength and faith to overcome these odds and I'm sorry but believing that your opposition has all the advantages is not the path to victory.



Ugh.. more of this Matrix crap..DAMN YOU LMS!!!! :cuss:

I will humor this tired analogy one more time...

Reality is what YOU make of it. That's the real message behind the Matrix. In that movie, all the characters were scared sh!tless of the sentinels. "They can bend time and space.. they have all the advantages!!" Sound familiar?

Humanity was doomed till Neo showed up and was like "Advantages Schmadvantages... watch this sh*t!!" He was only able to do this once he realized he had a purpose, a cause worth dying for. He flipped it on the sentinels when he finally realized his potential and let the taps off his personal power.

Now, do you think the movie would have had the same ending if ketostix was in Neo's shoes? No freaking way! He woulda ran off and shacked up with Trinity, feeling totally lucky that one of these female goddesses with all the advantages in the universe would actually grant him access to her golden vagina.



Sure there is. It's called IGNORANCE and LACK OF SELF-WORTH. The same elements that fuels guys to believe that their entire gender is at the mercy of another and punani is actually a rare mineral that must be mined with great care.

Click to expand...

Mwuahhahaha!!! Yeah yeah yea!!!!
Loved that!

its simple supply and demand and the change in perceived value that goes along with it :

-There are more men than women
-Demand form women is higher than demand for men
-women value goes higher
-Cost to obtain women goes up with their value
-Competition among men increases
-Women get special treatment and no longer have to respect men cause they can replace them so easily.
-Men get more desperate and start paying $10,000+ for prostitutes
-occurrence of sex crimes against women also increases...

JackPrescott said:

... had there been 14 women and 2 men, the men there would have been made of fukking gold.

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Actually almost al the women would leave to find a bar where that have the power...

Perception of a 2:

Women have all the advantages. They hold the treasure!



Perception of a 6:

Women have some advantages if we give them POWER over us .



Perception of a 10:

It's GREAT to be a MAN. Women THROW their p*ssy at me.

JackPrescott said:

This is true. It's all about "Supply and Demand."

Last night I was at a pub, in town. Two HB7s walked in, late 20's kind of heavy, not all that great looking, but dressed like Whor*es. Well, the ratio was 14 to 2. They thought they were Pamela Anderson and Jessica Alba, had there been 14 women and 2 men, the men there would have been made of fukking gold.

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Exactly, you get what I was saying. What Fingers posted sounds and feels good and all and it's not that I don't think men are overall more powerful, but that has little to do with the point of men being in high supply, and supply and demand. It's kind of like however many options a guy has multiply that times 5 for a female. And I was adding that now females have equal or greater economic leverage, hence they've been given all the advantages.

guru1000 said:

Perception of a 2:

Women have all the advantages. They hold the treasure!



Perception of a 6:

Women have some advantages if we give them POWER over us .



Perception of a 10:

It's GREAT to be a MAN. Women THROW their p*ssy at me.

Click to expand...

The girls that you fvck. Can they cook? Do they like to party? Do they have guy friends? Will they stay home if you ask them too? If one of there friends is a skank and you tell them don't hang around with her will they listen to you??? If all there friends are going to vegas and you tell them its disrespectful to go there will they see it your way?

Walk into a starbucks you will see 15 guys in there all by themselves like vultures gawking at woman. You won't see any HB9 sitting there gawking at men.

At 3 am when the clubs start to clear out who is left lingering?? Men looking to get laid. In the beginning stages of a relationship before a woman opens up her legs and in the coldapproach they have the power, And than the men wonder why they get flaked on.

Me personally no woman would ever say I am not attractive. I give myself a 9 and the lowest a woman could give me is probably a 7. If she did not find me attractive she might say he is good looking but not my type, or he is too ****y and those I usually end up banging.. lol

But even if your a 10 a woman that is a 7 will have more power than you. She will attract more men than you will woman anyday of the week, and that is pretty much a fact.

That is the power that woman have over us. Its the pu$$y.... There are AFC's that would spend $5000 for a piece of azz for the night. Go out on the street and sell your d1ck and you won't get $5 for it. We just had a high profile politician buying a call girl do you think a woman would do that? Fvck no.

Woman have only one power over us and thats the pu$$y. There have been many rapes,killiings,and wars because of pu$$Y. When has a woman ever fought over d1ck?

ketostix said:

Exactly, you get what I was saying. What Fingers posted sounds and feels good and all and it's not that I don't think men are overall more powerful, but that has little to do with the point of men being in high supply, and supply and demand. It's kind of like however many options a guy has multiply that times 5 for a female. And I was adding that now females have equal or greater economic leverage, hence they've been given all the advantages.

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This kind of defeatist theory, proves nothing. No actaul proof then your self inflicted oppression. Put a chain around your neck, your still an afc till you walk tall without your guess work.
Truth is you don't know what you just said, your repeating the voice of your surrounding afc brothers in chains. Stop! Your a man for god sake.

lookyoung said:

Woman have only one power over us and thats the pu$$y. There have been many rapes,killiings,and wars because of pu$$Y. When has a woman ever fought over d1ck?

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Inject 250 mg of TESTOSTERONE into a women and then repeat this.

Women are simply not AGGRESSORS because of their lack of T. Have you ever met a woman bodybuilder?? You would feel like the WOMAN. Believe me!

A good looking woman has only her prime years to attract.

A good looking man has most of his life.

A man poor in the looks department who is higher in the status/wealth scale has his whole life.

MAN's Attraction value= Looks + Wealth + Status

Only 1 part of this equation needs to work

Woman's Attraction Value= Looks

The girls that you fvck. Can they cook? Do they like to party? Do they have guy friends? Will they stay home if you ask them too? If one of there friends is a skank and you tell them don't hang around with her will they listen to you??? If all there friends are going to vegas and you tell them its disrespectful to go there will they see it your way?

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They are SOLDIERS!

ZenGodMod said:

This kind of defeatist theory, proves nothing. No actaul proof then your self inflicted oppression. Put a chain around your neck, your still an afc till you walk tall without your guess work.
Truth is you don't know what you just said, your repeating the voice of your surrounding afc brothers in chains. Stop! Your a man for god sake.

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OK if we're going to throw labels and deny things as plain as daylight, then I'm going to say you're a KBJ. How does your counter theory benefit anyone really? All your doing is giving a green light for women to collectively complain and demand more.

guru1000 said:

MAN's Attraction value= Looks + Wealth + Status

Only 1 part of this equation needs to work

Woman's Attraction Value= Looks

Click to expand...

No a man needs some of all three and to be at least average to above average in at least one to do well with women. Looks are just an extra for women. All women need is their pvssy and it results in an over supply of men.

Look, what I'm saying is that women are spoiled. If guys can't even admit that then is it any wonder women continue to become more spoiled? This common mentality that men have that women don't have it too good is in IMO why, as Lookyoung has explained so well, all that women are offering to the table is pvssy. it's just an observation and maybe a rant, but I don't get why some guys feel the need to create strawmen to attack.

ketostix said:

All women need is their pvssy and it results in an over supply of men.

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Yep.. AFCs and men who just want to fukk them. As I said though, this is not what women are after. You keep making the mistake of assuming that they operate with the same motives as we do.. this is a crucial error!

Your whole stance is that the grass is greener in women-land but you are dead wrong.

What you refer to as a "steady supply" may seem like heaven to you, but trust me, it is actually a nuisance to a hot babe. She has to deal with a constant procession of drooling fukktards every day who are either creepy, desperate or just want to get in her pants. That sh!t is annoying when sex is not your biggest priority.

Look, what I'm saying is that women are spoiled. If guys can't even admit that then is it any wonder women continue to become more spoiled?

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Dont stray from your original point. Please explain to me how being spoiled is an advantage. If anything it destroys any chance you have at finding true happiness. All the attention, gifts and supplication in the world will not make a woman happy, it will just give her a baseless sense of entitlement that will sabotage her from ever finding the man of her dreams.

Honestly, the real reason women are spoiled is because weak-ass fools put such a high premium on the poon to begin with. This is why women will not have any advantage whatsoever on a strong man with standards and options on his plate.

When a man has higher expectations from a woman than an orifice in her body, he is beyond the woeful contemplations of armchair philosophy.. he is too busy having fun with the Hunt to be concerned with spoiled wh0re nonsense.

...all that women are offering to the table is pvssy. it's just an observation and maybe a rant, but I don't get why some guys feel the need to create strawmen to attack.

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By strawmen do you mean the steady stream of drivel you've been posting? Was it not you who challenged us to show just one advantage men have in this game? Haven't you repeatedly reasserted that women will ALWAYS have the upper hand? Expect to have your ass handed to you not only for making such irresponsible remarks, but also for defending them tooth and nail and basically whining like the women you scorn.

Whatever, I'm done trying to wake your punk ass up. If this mentality of yours is getting you the results you want, then by all means play on brother.. but if it isn't (and I have a strong premonition that it aint) then perhaps you need to rethink your take on the situation.

Maybe it's not women that have such a big advantage. Perhaps it is actually YOU that is massively disadvantaged.

ketostix said:

No a man needs some of all three and to be at least average to above average in at least one to do well with women. Looks are just an extra for women. All women need is their pvssy and it results in an over supply of men.

Look, what I'm saying is that women are spoiled. If guys can't even admit that then is it any wonder women continue to become more spoiled? This common mentality that men have that women don't have it too good is in IMO why, as Lookyoung has explained so well, all that women are offering to the table is pvssy. it's just an observation and maybe a rant, but I don't get why some guys feel the need to create strawmen to attack.

Click to expand...

Seems like you BELIEVE your testosterone is a curse rather than a blessing. Good luck to you.

guru1000 said:

Seems like you BELIEVE your testosterone is a curse rather than a blessing. Good luck to you.

Click to expand...

LoL talk about an example of a strawman argument. I've never brought up testosterone. I never said that women were naturally better than men, Fingers is really saying that. I've said basically that nature gave both women and men advantages but modern American society has taken all of men's advantages and gave them to women. You can disagree if you want to, that's fine.

Finger's, I don't agree with your assertions that most men are AFCs and women are so great, which is what you're essentially saying. Sure there are men that are AFCs but this is more of an effect than a cause, i.e., men aren't AFCs for no reason and AFC is the cause. No men are AFC because of a cause and AFCism is an effect of that cause. The cause is women having advantages outside of the responsibility of these AFCs in the first place. Sure, being an AFC doesn't help them much, but you claim it doesn't help women either and I disagree. I find you annoying more than anything else. Your post are full of ridiculous claims and kind of childish conclusions.

Señor Fingers said:

.. drooling fukktards..

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:crackup: AFC = drooling fukktard :crackup:

that's one image I plan to keep! Thanks

ketostix said:

OK if we're going to throw labels and deny things as plain as daylight, then I'm going to say you're a KBJ. How does your counter theory benefit anyone really? All your doing is giving a green light for women to collectively complain and demand more.

Click to expand...

The only thing plain as day is your denial! Seriously do you even get laid?
How does you theory benefit the rest of us?

"Women have the advantage....OMG...us men are doomed...Oh sh!t! I wish i was born a woman!!! So someone can stick a d!ck into me!"

mrRuckus said:

Weak men are at the disadvantage. How can they control me with pu55y power if I have 10 pu55ies at arm's reach? Sh1t, i sent a girl home from my place Saturday night who was mad I wouldn't kiss her. I didn't feel like it. Then an hour after that I had a booty call from my one fvck buddy who was at a bar about 3 blocks away, "want some company?" 'No, I'm tired; I'm going to bed.' Even if i was horny big deal... it's easier to rub one out in 5 minutes than stay up waiting for her to get there and then put in all that effort of sexing and seeing to her needs too when all i would want is quick relief and to get to sleep. There isn't some exclusive vagina mine on the Moon. It's everywhere, and it's free as in beer.

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When I do it, t's a good long hour, maybe more. Wanking is the opportunity to train your endurance, else I don't wank. If a girl's not getting me off right, I'll tell her to move her thighs in and out more.

azanon said:

The harder challenge is getting rid of them when you're done with them. Now that's hard sometimes. With the more crazy ones, it can be downright scary if you have a psycho-wench on your hands.

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You got that right. Them Indian ones come beatin on your door armed with a tamohawk at 2 in the morning in a slurred speech telling me to "open up" so all the neighbors can hear. They broke into my apartment one day and stole my guitar.