Confess my feelings, not exactly sure now

Creative · Dec 28, 2007

There’s this girl I've fell in love with. We dated for a couple months but she said she wanted to be friends cause she wasn't ready for a relationship, I never confess how I felt about her. But we still made out and stuff for several more months, and then we just stop making out just recently. She sends me confused mix signals. I have known her for almost a year. I decided to do something special for her and also confess. I invited her to my place, had a candle light dinner set up with soft music playing in the background. I cook her Italian food, and had champagne. We talked about life, the atmosphere was so romantic.

I gave her some Christmas gifts and she seemed very happy, I handed her a rose. I put some thought in trying to get her something thoughtful and nice; she really loved the presents I got her. In it was a card that expresses my feelings. I asked her if she knew how I felt about her, she said “more than just friends.” I gave her a real close hug and whisper in her ears, "I'm in love with you...." looked her in the eyes and said "I want to be with you...” Just stare at her eyes while holding her and said “will you give me a chance?" She says back to me "we’re friends.” She said she had to go and she grabs the gifts and I said "Take care...” I guess I was too romantic and came on too strong but I needed an answer from her. I'm not exactly sure what to do now.

redspicyflag · Dec 28, 2007

ouch

ouch

Yeah you're on your way to becoming a dj

LJBF is coming next

so heads up

And don't confess your feelings

That's driving a stake into a coffin

Vice · Dec 28, 2007

Yeah, you're getting SO AFC on her.

Stop showing her so much damn affection and start having fun with her. Tease her. Go somewhere fun and just hang out, and don't say anything along the lines of "I love you". It'll drive her away.

You can still salvage this. It'll take time though.

Potbelly · Dec 28, 2007

you know why they call it confessing your feelings? it's like confessing a crime....it not good

CLICK DJ BIBLE LINK AT THE BOTTOM OFTHE PAGE AND LEARN!

Brians_600rr · Dec 28, 2007

Vice said:
Yeah, you're getting SO AFC on her.

Stop showing her so much damn affection and start having fun with her. Tease her. Go somewhere fun and just hang out, and don't say anything along the lines of "I love you". It'll drive her away.

You can still salvage this. It'll take time though.

Bro, it would take a miracle to salvage this situation. I mean, come on, the dude went SUPER AFC on the chick. He bought her gifts/roses, totally tried to impress her with a romantic dinner, and then to top it off he confessed his LOVE for her!!!!! Huge mistake bro.

I think the only thing you can do to salvage this, is to just move on. Maybe she'll here about you dating other chicks and maybe that will spark that attraction which started this mess.

And if all the stars align and she actually starts to have feelings for u again. Play it cool!!! good luck bro

Bonhomme · Dec 28, 2007

Creative said:
I'm not exactly sure what to do now.

Learn from it, move on, find some others, and do differently.

I supposed that solved the problem of uncertainty.

Prodigy746 · Dec 28, 2007

Rofl at the "SHE TOOK THE GIFTS AND LEFT". What a hoe ....if she doesnt care about you why take the gifts. Man next that girl ASAP

Monkey · Dec 28, 2007

Creative said:
I'm not exactly sure what to do now.

Do anything you want, it won't matter, because this girl is NOT interested.

j0n024 · Dec 28, 2007

True I mean you put lots of thought into that night and she just up and bailed on you AFTER saying the same thing of LJBF! What a b1tch...I'm sorry but that's how I see her, your date was by the books and I applaud you for taking the time to do all that for one girl but those days are long gone man the only time you should do that is for your mom or a women you have been with for over a year already and you know she doesnt cheat on you! I am sorry for what has happened and hopefully you learned your lesson otherwise you will be down in the dumps for a long long time...good luck.

romangod · Dec 28, 2007

Creative said:
I gave her some Christmas gifts and she seemed very happy, I handed her a rose. I put some thought in trying to get her something thoughtful and nice; she really loved the presents I got her. In it was a card that expresses my feelings. I asked her if she knew how I felt about her, she said “more than just friends.” I gave her a real close hug and whisper in her ears, "I'm in love with you...." looked her in the eyes and said "I want to be with you...” Just stare at her eyes while holding her and said “will you give me a chance?" She says back to me "we’re friends.” She said she had to go and she grabs the gifts and I said "Take care...” I guess I was too romantic and came on too strong but I needed an answer from her. I'm not exactly sure what to do now.

Being a romantic AFC is a big mistake with a girl you're not already intimate with. Romance should be a reward when already in a relationship and feelings are already established. Using it as bait in the hope that she will like you is the kiss of death. She won't. It is time to forget her and move on. You screwed up.

.

Potbelly · Dec 28, 2007

I just read this again and it's pretty damn funny. Suddenly I don't feel guilty for myself this past week...hell AT LEAST IT'S FOR ME TO KEEP!! HAHAHAHA

unlike your sorrry azzz

You lose this one mate...move on. Cut and run. Quit while you're not so far behind.

The Deacon · Dec 28, 2007

Wow, that's a nasty burn. I take it she just thought of you as a "friend with benefits" cause she made out with you and not really as a potential lover. You know, it could just be she's one of those really fickle chicks who, for reasons unknown to the human race, you could do everything right with and she'll still be scared of getting into a serious relationship.

At this point, she's not gonna answer your calls or your texts so don't bother doing either. If you try to approach her in person, she's probably going to try and avoid you. She just felt awkward about that whole situation, and there's not really much you can do at this point except get some balls and confront her about it (which will be tricky because of the above reasons).

Theoretically speaking, you could take this out of the supreme awkward funk, but if you end up unsuccessful, just get on with your life. Oneitis is such a terrible disease.

Francisco d'Anconia · Dec 28, 2007

Wasn't there a thread started a couple of days ago similar to this asking if he should bring up the topic of being more than "just friends (with benefits)?" This is a good example of what could happen if you force the issue before she's ready. It's a fault so many guys have about needing specific definitions associated with the things and people in their lives.

Francisco d'Anconia · Dec 28, 2007

Prodigy746 said:
Rofl at the "SHE TOOK THE GIFTS AND LEFT". What a hoe ....if she doesnt care about you why take the gifts. Man next that girl ASAP

This is why I'm adamant against trying to impress a woman with what you have (or what you can give her) instead of impressing her with yourself. You can end up with a woman that is more impressed with your stuff.

MikeEdward1973 · Dec 28, 2007

Creative,

I'm one of any number of guys on this board that used to do stuff like this. In fact, I've done much worse than this.

She is not interested. There is nothing left for you to do. No closure to seek, no further action items. Unless she owes you money or something, I wouldn't bother with her again, except for perhaps an annual holiday e-card, or something.

About 9 months ago, I started what some people would call 'serial dating.' Lot of Match.com, lot of getting introduced to new people via friends, and of course hitting some nice bars & clubs now & then. I bet if you try this, you're going to feel a lot better.

Francisco d'Anconia · Dec 28, 2007

MikeEdward1973 said:
...She is not interested. There is nothing left for you to do. No closure to seek, no further action items. Unless she owes you money or something, I wouldn't bother with her again, except for perhaps an annual holiday e-card, or something....

closure - klō-zhər - n. (male) : The act of asking to have your other nut slammed in the door.

romangod · Dec 28, 2007

Francisco d'Anconia said:
closure - klō-zhər - n. (male) : The act of asking to have your other nut slammed in the door.

:crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:

.

Mr. Wolf · Dec 28, 2007

Creative said:
There’s this girl I've fell in love with. We dated for a couple months but she said she wanted to be friends cause she wasn't ready for a relationship

Brother, let's pretend that you have your best buddy George. George is a cool dude. One day he takes your hand, and confesses his love to you, and then tells you two should explore this more..

Wouldn't this evoke this "Ewwwwwww" feeling inside of you?

Well brother. Never confess your feelings to friends, because they will get disgusted..

Creative · Dec 29, 2007

Thanks for all the positive feedback and advice. I definitely screw up but I knew this girl for almost a year and I wanted an answer from her because she kept sending mixed signals. The more cold I act to her, the closer she gets, the more I chase her the farther she goes from me. She said we're friends but she makes out with me and other times she wouldn't. I wasn't sure if she was playing mind games or not but I got tired of it and wanted to know how she felt. I definitely showed too much affection, one of my weakness. I wanted to make her feel special, I had feelings for her and I guess that was also my downfall. I put myself in a situation where I've emotionally imprison myself because I invested so much of myself to one person. My heart was wide open to her. At least I know I tried my best and know without regret. I guess this is good for me because now I know she wasn't interested in me and was just using me, when she felt lonely or needed someone to hangout with. I can finally move on, I tried my best. I can feel the pain searing through me, I know time will fade these wounds and I will become a stronger person. I will never ever let that happen to me again.

Effington · Dec 29, 2007

Wow, ultimate horrible move, I'm sorry it came to that. Yeah, if you had any chance before, it is now gone. Don't pursue this one anymore.

If she's a cool girl she will be friendly with you, but also will be cautious not to try and lead you on. Reading what you did kind of made me cringe inside, in a "NO NO NO" kind of way.

I hate to admit it, but I kinda pulled one of those moves in my younger days, although I didn't go to the extreme you did. Live and learn, I guess.

Your move should be to cut contact with her, as much as that will suck. It's going to be majorly awkward going forward.

Confess my feelings, not exactly sure now

Don Juan

Master Don Juan

Master Don Juan

Master Don Juan

Don Juan

Peace and Quiet

Master Don Juan

Master Don Juan

Master Don Juan

Master Don Juan

Master Don Juan

Master Don Juan

Senior Don Juan

Master Don Juan

Master Don Juan

Senior Don Juan

Master Don Juan

Master Don Juan

Banned

Don Juan

Master Don Juan

Too Many Women?