MY GF is an AFC

.. and what is so bad about having a clingy, faithful woman who'll do whatever you ask, again? I fail to see the point here.

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Ask a woman that question about a man, see her response...

Everyone is sitting here telling you that you have THEIR dream girl. Is she YOUR dream girl? She sounds great to me, but I have doubts she'd be my dream girl - I like 'em a little feisty myself.

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Great thoughts btw, she IS great, but she's not my dream-girl because I don't require or desire to have a woman be my mother and tend to all my needs. I have a strong personality and I like to wrestle around a little and chase my dinner, not have it handed to me on a silver platter. She could easily become my dream-girl if she just learned how to BALANCE, i'm not saying for her to start denying me sex, or stop cooking for me period, or stop cleaning my house, I'm just saying... cook for me Tues. and Thurs. and well go out with your friends on Sat.... the rest of the week i'm yours !!

I'm working with her, if I see her trying to change aka finding some balance i'm in for the longer haul and we'll continue having a great LTR... but if she keeps going like she is, I guarantee i'll end up cheating on her or leaving her before it gets to that point... WE've talked it out for like 3 hours last night and we're both on the same page, she wants marriage and I'm still 22 and not looking for that, she was treating me like a husband and not a bf... she says she understands and she'll slow down... sounds great to me !

Control is an illusion anyway.
So to see things otherwise is to be led by misunderstanding.

Also... a woman "wide open"... EXCELLENT!
My ex was a sneaky closed mistrusting snake of a B!TCH. (and thats putting it lightly, lol)

Bro, I feel you when you say there is literally no tension, thus its boring. But, maybe you should create the tension you like. Don't pit it on her. Keep her the pure wide open, wanting to satisfy innocence she is.

Everyone else has given you plenty of advice.
The only unique addition I can add is... Becareful.

A situation like this, could flip on you SEVERELY.
What if she does catch on to the game!? What if she does start turning you down, and sees the power she can wield over you. She could easily turn the tables here, once she sees the strings your trying to show her, and what they do. Especially coming from such a desperate place of love/desire to have you. And as you say... she's not one for balance, thus could take this to the extreme as well. Not out of malice, but out of application to achieve her wonderful desires for you.

So... I would warn you, in trying to change her to becoming hip the game. I would simply implement the amount of leverage you need, to keep the relationship fun and attractive.

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Great points, you're always helpful. The best tip I've taken out of this is to NOT depend on her for sexual tension and excitement, I need to provide this for myself if I need it. Either with me and her or within my own life, I kind was lacking some excitement in my own life and took a little out on her, so I've got to make some changes to the rest of my life and it'll help...

Yeah and I se eyour point about her going from one extreme to the other haha, she has no middle so that's completely possible. But I work under the assumption that if two people are supposed to be together, they'll be together. I'm not AFRAID to lose her, I'm really not, I love her but if its not meant to be I'll find someone else... I always have, I look too good lol. If I ever don't have feelings for her, I'll just leave... no problems, I tell her the same thing for me... we both get each other.... we're not settling

On the other hand, even the best of things can get old, especially if there is a pattern to it. How often have I read "be a challenge" on this board? Well for me anyway, it goes two ways, I need a bit of unpredictibility in my girlfriend - someone who won't be agreeable all of the time (except of course when I need to get laid). Wanting what you can't have only makes you appreciate it more once you get it, so I don't mind the occasional NO. But if I never heard NO, I'd start to wonder.

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Glad you understand a little bit of what i'm going through. I don't plan on leaving her, just working on getting the balance just right. She's always going to be who she is (she told me that) and said she has no desire to become a bvtch or 'evil' and she'll always keep her good spirit, but she's willing to relax a little and just enjoy without having it be necessary to be superwoman...

I honestly can't believe what his problem is. He's found a woman who obviously loves him to death and will do anything for him and he's complaining? I found a girl like that once, and I married her! As a result that area of my life has been beyond wonderful for the past seven years now and has no indication of changing. Yet if he'd been with a ***** who cheated on him and disrespected him he'd be wishing he'd had a faithful girlfriend like the one he's got now.

I don't know whether to laugh or cry at this thread, I really don't.

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You're irrational and hence no response is necessary... u can stop commenting now as you're opinions are no longer valid for me. Tks for taking time to help out tho bro..

Well, that's the bottom line here - she isn't that hot...which is why she's so compliant and he isn't sprung on her.

If she was really hot, she wouldn't be that naive and he certainly wouldn't be whining...(even if she WAS still that nice)!

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First off, I've DUMPED girls hotter than hell for WAY LESS... i can get 10's if i really wanted, its nothing about physical attraction, all i gotta be is attracted, I ainn't gotta be cummin in my pants everytime i see you... i'm not shallow, far from... I've had hot girls, nothing to them... i want happiness, not some fantasy girlfriend... please ur so ignorant

Has much more to do than with physical attraction, I'm VERY well attracted to her. She's no model, but she's more attractive than most people walking down the street IMO...






Tks again fellas, much help you've been !



-Cod3r

Whatever bro. I'm not irrational, I look at things very simply because there's no need to be more complicated than that.. and I'm simply telling you, your girl is very rare and a lucky find and if you were to dump her for someone more 'challenging' you may regret it for a long time if not forever.

Oh, and I'm happily married and older than you, in case you think I'm just some 16 yo throwing out advice off the top of my head.

Btw, I thought you were gonna start working out. Drop by H&F sometime.

^ ^ ^ I only called you 'irrational' because you keep insisting that i'm going to 'dump her' when I expressly stated I have ZERO intention of leaving her..

Also, don't make the mistake and think i'm some 18 year old that knows nothing about women. I may be young (22) but I've had enough experienes to know how things work, I'm not lusing after this woman, I'm genuinely in love and ready to make it work, not some loser arsehole that runs at first signs of trouble...

Btw, I thought you were gonna start working out. Drop by H&F sometime.

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Yeah I've been pounding hard bro, I don't have a scale to check gains but I look much bigger than usual and have had comments recently. What's H&F ?? I train at Eastern Athletics, pretty nice gym... its huge


-Cod3r

Cod3r said:

^ ^ ^ I only called you 'irrational' because you keep insisting that i'm going to 'dump her' when I expressly stated I have ZERO intention of leaving her..

Also, don't make the mistake and think i'm some 18 year old that knows nothing about women. I may be young (22) but I've had enough experienes to know how things work, I'm not lusing after this woman, I'm genuinely in love and ready to make it work, not some loser arsehole that runs at first signs of trouble...



Yeah I've been pounding hard bro, I don't have a scale to check gains but I look much bigger than usual and have had comments recently. What's H&F ?? I train at Eastern Athletics, pretty nice gym... its huge


-Cod3r

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lol, I meant the Health and Fitness forum on this site. Sorry for the misunderstanding about your girl, I should really start reading threads instead of skimming over them.

^ ^ NP :rock: <-- seriously u gotta love this guy

I'm a 'lurker' over there at H&F. Afraid to post right now, you guys are experts i'm just reading to find out some info here and there lol. I don't like opening my mouth unless I have intelligent questions that haven't been answered somewhere else before...

Don't worry i'm always lurking muahaha


-Cod3r

Cod3r said:

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Woa. Is she the girl from Ringu & Ju-on?

Some guys got it so rough....

I hope I have problems like this some day

I understand a man acting like a wimp (pussified) being called an AFC.

But a woman acting like a perfect woman used to? You cannot call a woman that is giving to her man an AFC. You can only call her the “traditional woman” that not longer exist. The same way you can call the few masculine men in today’s society the “traditional men” that not longer exist.

Cod3r, is it that she's no challenge when you're with her, or is it the fact that you're with her too much?

I think you just don't want to be in the same room with the same person for 5 and a half of the 6 hours when you're not at work or asleep. And you don't want to hear any subtle, crestfallen guilt trip when you "skip a day".

I have had clingy gf's, and I just laid down the law: "I won't be seeing you more than 3 times a week. I don't make the rules, I just enforce them." I was pretty vague on who made the rules . . . but anyhow, that's something simple to try.

If you were a truck driver who only saw her every other weekend, I'm sure your emotions would be different. So get busy (not as busy as a truck driver), and stop taking her calls every day to listen to her whine about not seeing you enough.

Woa. Is she the girl from Ringu & Ju-on?

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lol ur always entertaining :yes:

Cod3r, is it that she's no challenge when you're with her, or is it the fact that you're with her too much?

I think you just don't want to be in the same room with the same person for 5 and a half of the 6 hours when you're not at work or asleep. And you don't want to hear any subtle, crestfallen guilt trip when you "skip a day".

I have had clingy gf's, and I just laid down the law: "I won't be seeing you more than 3 times a week. I don't make the rules, I just enforce them." I was pretty vague on who made the rules . . . but anyhow, that's something simple to try.

If you were a truck driver who only saw her every other weekend, I'm sure your emotions would be different. So get busy (not as busy as a truck driver), and stop taking her calls every day to listen to her whine about not seeing you enough.

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You seem to understand, its just I have a hectic life and it sometimes seems she waits for me to get home from a 12 hour work day and immediately she's ready to jump on me... I don't get anytime to think or eat or sleep, I don't have time to myself at all...

To her credit, she dosen't act like this always just sometimes. Also everything is cleared up now and I'm glad we had a discussion about it, we're stronger than ever, she'll be here in another hour or so lol


-Cod3r

Cod3r said:

...To her credit, she dosen't act like this always just sometimes.

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It sure didn't seem that way by how you described it! :woo:

None the less, glad to hear that you've worked out things. Relationships need constant tending like a garden to keep it healthy. As long as you address issues before they become unmanageable you should be fine.

I'd like to have a woman like that, you can be sure she wouldn't cheat on you. I would marry that kind of girl.